Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum Podcast.

Okay, GBC, Erin, come on in, come on in. This is exciting. Big news, big news, big news. You know how we do that podcast together?

Hey Riddle Riddle. Yes, it was on the tip of my tongue.

I thought, um, this is maybe something that, like, I don't know if, like, fan club Chicago Improv.

Sorry, I couldn't remember how I knew you guys. I was like, are these my doctors? Are these my doctors?

We've played your doctors.

Right. Improv, uh, Riddle Riddle. Okay. On the same page. Caught up. Caught up.

I feel like this used to be a big fad maybe with like, you know, like the Beatles fan club or like with the Brady Bunch or whatever. I thought we, as a collective, as Hey Riddle Riddle, the podcast, we should get a pet. So I got us a fun little pet and we can name it like Riddles or I guess Riddles is like the only good name. The best name. And Erin, here's the thing. It is a racehorse.

Okay. Because is it like the type of thing that like when we're here it's kind of all of our responsibilities and then we all have to take turns taking it on weekends and holidays.

Oh shit, I didn't even think about the upkeek.

So it's Riddle? If it's a racehorse, shouldn't it have like, um, don't racehorses have like longer names like, you know, Daddy's $20 Little Habit or something like that?

Daddy's $20 Little Habit?

Daddy's $20 Little Habit?

He found something that costs $20 these days?

Are you buying those state-sponsored Starbucks cups or whatever? What about a racehorse called Hey Riddle Riddle?

That's a longer name.

That's a good name.

Hey Riddle Riddle's coming down the track.

Passing the other ones.

Oh, the horse has seemingly given up on the race. He's smoking a cigarette. He's flicked the cigarette butt into a crowd. He's getting hostile towards the crowd. That sounds good to me.

The horse is calling for a scene. He wants to see two of the other horses playing doctors in the moonlight. Adal, this is great. Did you already purchase the horse? I did. It's actually behind this screen.

Oh, okay. Not the oxygen-proof screen. Don't tell me.

Oh, no. Not the air-sealed... Horses breathe oxygen? Uh-oh. I thought they were like a different kind of creature.

Well, that's a good point because seahorses don't, Erin, so like half of the horses don't breathe oxygen.

That's a good point.

Oh, I'm sorry. I got a sea racehorse. No, I'm sorry. I got a racist... C-word horse.

Doctors in the Moonlight is a great name for a horse.

I got, I got, what Adal got is a racist cunt horse.

You said those words.

Erin.

You said those words.

Erin, will you please, please help us raise racist cunt, the horse, also known as The Horse in the Moonlight.

Doctors in the Moonlight, turning the bend.

Adal, this is a great gift. I will say, It was maybe a little bit parallel thinking. I also got us, ordered us, an animal kind of to be like our shared podcast pet. I'm glad that Adal's horse thing worked out well because mine did not. I wasn't even going to bring it up. I tried to order us a pheasant.

Oh, that's nice.

Yeah.

Okay, is it alive?

No, it came dead. Yeah. And I kind of fat thumbed it a little bit. I ordered us what I thought was going to be a pheasant. I got a peasant. So this was a... Oh no.

So this peasant's dead.

Oh, it's a dead peasant for sure.

This is a medieval peasant.

Is he plucked? Is he de-feathered? He was tarred and feathered because apparently this one had done some bad stuff in town and they had kind of run him out. He was kind of a racist, a little bit of a... But parallel thinking, that's crazy, huh?

Wow, that is insane. Well, maybe we can tie that dead peasant to the horse and that can be like a fun, like it's a duo. So Erin, like you said, doctors in the moonlight. Doctors implies two, so now we have our doctors in the moonlight. Yeah. Perfect.

Thanks Adal and JPC. I'm Erin and I'm here on Cunt Watch. That's right. I'm counting how many times my male co-hosts have said cunt this episode and how many times I had said it before just now.

Casey Bleeper.

I'm catching up to them.

Casey Bleeper.

I've said it twice.

It's crazy to have her say that. Just bleep this out please.

Back to you Adal and JPC. Ya cunts.

UK listeners are like, why are they making such a big deal out of this?

That's what they called Baywatch in the UK. Just cunt. Not even cunt watch, just cunt. Well, you know, it's a new year. It's mid-October, it's a brand new year. What calendar? Is this a new year? Pagan. Pagan. Yeah, kind of, you know? Pagan. Pagan. Pagan? It's a Pagan calendar?

It's a Pagan calendar. Musical guest.

Pagan calendar. It's a brand new year. We're happy that you're celebrating it here with us. We know that you could be anywhere.

And I think... You could be anywhere else in the world.

You could be anywhere in the world. We got two dead animals. One's a person. The other one may or may not be a seahorse.

Hey, rule of threes? Three dead animals. Pull up. Did you say ta-da or hot dogs? What did I say?

I think I said ta-da. Erin, what do we have here? Erin is a magician.

I fed it hot dogs. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Pushes the wagon out of frame. What were we talking about? Something funny, I bet.

Erin, that was a hot dog in one of those little Dunkin' Donuts L.L. Bean sweaters.

It was. Cute.

I'm not familiar with the Dunkin' Donuts L.L. Bean sweater. Well, JBC, would you believe they come out tomorrow?

Just in time for to wear them to what? Where would you wear one of these? To your court-mandated anger management?

Your Honor, I'd like to see my kids and to prove how serious I am, here is me wearing my Dunkin' Donuts. So here's what it is. It is an L.L. Bean sweater for your cup of coffee.

Oh, it's an L.L. Bean sweater for your cup of coffee.

So it's a koozie, but we obviously would never say that C word on the show. No.

And we apologize to everyone listening in, I want to say Finland, for who we upset by saying koozie. Oh boy. Because they already have Lapland. Yeah. This sucks. I'm looking at this online. This is a little Duncan L.L. Bean sweatshirt. Not only does it suck, it really sucks that like, So many places are reporting it and it's all like Boston Globe, Boston.com, Dunkin Donuts.com. It's just like everyone in the Boston area is just only reporting on this. But then I do have another, I'm looking at the list of the people, you know, Food Network is on here as well, but the Portland Press-Herald also is reporting it. And I believe that that's got to be Portland, Maine, right? Oh, yeah. They're like, we're close enough to Boston that we could still talk about Oh yeah, it's talking about how their Dunkin' locations across Maine. So they're just trying to jump in on the Boston action, on the Dunkin' action. Do they care about Dunkin' Donuts in Maine too, Erin, I'm assuming? Do they consider themselves Dunkin' Donuts territory as well?

I think so. This is a literal territory. You guys know about the Dunkin' Donuts witch and the shadow she casts over New England.

Well, I know it's sort of a Hatfields-McCoy situation with Starbucks and Dunkin' on the US map.

And Connecticut is where the line is. And every year, right before Christmas, everyone brings those, like, travel coffee mugs, and then they, like, shake them and spray them at each other, which doesn't make sense because they're not carbonated, right? So why would that? Why would they do that?

They're spraying hot coffee at each other? Yeah. And that word's on the Dunkin' Witch?

Well, you have to make sacrifices to the Dunkin' Witch. Do you guys we don't learn we only learn about regional history, huh? Yeah, it's so crazy. I can't believe they don't teach about the Duncan went to the schools. That's wild.

Yeah, Maine is in her territory. Yeah. Now, Erin, this is for you to say yay or nay to. Of course. What was the brand that your famous sweater was from?

Farm Rio.

Okay. Could we, you, make some Hey Riddle Riddle coffee sweaters that are exact replicas of the Farm Rio sweater? And is there a way for us to skirt around the legal issue of replicating a design?

I wonder if they'll sue me if I say, I didn't mean to. I didn't know any better.

Now, Duncan makes coffee, so it makes sense that they have a little sweater to go in the coffee cup. We make bullshit. So what could... What could we put... What could we wrap our bullshit around? Like, what is it?

You can put bullshit in a koozie.

Sort of a catch-all. That feels like one of those homesy phrases of like, you can put bullshit in a koozie.

Let's make a koozie that makes cold coffee hot and hot coffee cold. Just to piss people off.

Technology. I just want to slap a sweater on coffee, Erin. I don't want to have to create something.

Grok make a technology that makes cold coffee, hot coffee, cold coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, and then Grok does it and then it's okay.

And then Grok does like this cool, totally not woke joke that makes the whole room laugh. Right, Elon? That's right, Erin.

In 30 years, we will not need coffee. In 30 years, we will not need coffee. You'll all just be motivated to work for me. Full self-drinking.

Full self-drinking coffee. In the next four months, no one will be drinking coffee. Coffee will be being drunk by you.

Not if the Duncan Witch has anything to say about it, billionaires.

Fucking moron. Yeah, she can't swim, but she can curse you. You know what I would like to do? I'd like to dunk him. I'd like to dunk him in a goddamn ditch.

The Duncan Ditch. Hey!

Elon Musk and I'm dunking you in a ditch and you're fucking... JPC, you don't mean it.

You're just mad.

You might have to bleep some of this stuff.

You're just mad. You don't mean it. You're just upset.

Yeah, you're right, you're right. I'm just upset, but I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm cooling down, like my hot Dunkin' coffee.

I'm cooling down. Well, speaking of, you can put bullshit in a koozie, or whatever we said, today we're going to play a little game known as, what's that Sinatra song, In Other Words? In other words, what's that song?

I did it my way.

Now, I know what you're thinking, because he said Sinatra's song and your brain immediately said, stop listening to anything else he's saying and just say, I did it my way. My brain did the same thing.

Am I wrong?

I don't know. I don't know who's right. I don't know who to believe.

In other words, I guess that isn't my way.

You're right. You're right about what I did.

I only know Sinatra. I don't think I've ever sat down and listened to a Sinatra album. I don't think I've ever been like, let's hear what his whole oeuvre was about. I think I know him from songs from Ocean's Eleven movies and that's it.

Would you believe that's Mel Tormé? Welcome to the show. Boys will be boys. Boys will be boys. Boys will be boys.

Boys. Adal, that's a great example. I love that example. I feel like I'm absolutely fucking ready to dig into the rest of these. Can we take a little break first?

Yeah, of course. Let's all drink our coffee.

Boys will be boys.

Hey everybody, it's JPC. Well, it happened again. I was in the market for a weather balloon, I had stopped at a roadside weather balloon stand, and as I was browsing, kind of the new weather balloons, the 2026s, the 2027s that have just kind of hit the lot, they release in fall of the previous year, I got all of my clothes snagged on a weather balloon and the dang thing took off and took all of my clothes with it. So, completely naked and I'm thinking to myself, JPC, why does this keep happening to you? And then I thought, well, it doesn't matter, my friend, because you can go to Quince. Quince focuses on high-quality wardrobe staples made with premium materials like 100% Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton, and merino wool. The styles are timeless, versatile, and designed to become the dependable pieces you reach for day after day. And I'll be honest with you, I put on this 100% mongolian cashmere sweater and this thing is not breaking the bank. It starts at just $60 and I thought there's no way this thing gets snagged on another weather balloon and pulls all my clothes off up into the sky to who knows where. And when temperatures start to drop, it's more important to Thanks for watching! Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns now available in Canada and the UK too. And when quints ask where you heard about them, let them know it was Hey Riddle Riddle, and more specifically, it was JPC who got all his clothes stolen by a weather balloon. It's the best way to support the show.

JPC, Erin, good day. I hope you notice my solid gold clothing.

Wow! Whoa!

Clink, clink, clink, clink. It's just I've saved so much money with Rocket Money. Have you heard? Have you seen?

Oh, yeah. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings and buy an awesome outfit made of gold. Adal!

I mean, yeah, that's truly made of gold. I mean, it looks soft, but heavy.

Malleable, yes.

Yeah.

Is it comfortable? No. But looking good can sometimes hurt. It looks good. You look great.

I love Rocket Money. I've been using it since way before they were a sponsor. I love how it consolidates my checking, saving, loans, and investments into a single dashboard and gives me a clear picture of where I'm at. I just moved recently, and I've been loving Rocket Money because it's helping me see how much I'm going over budget in some of my little categories. And I go, oop, I've bought in too many new vases for my new house. My vase budget went a couple hundred over. But that's OK, because I'm saving money by canceling all of my unwanted subscriptions.

Yeah, you can also set budgets, set goals if you have like big ticket items that you're saving for like further down the road. We're saving for a car right now and it's it's useful to be able to use Rocket Money Plug a little bit away at a time so that hopefully that you will get there when the time is right. And with their regular personalized insights and regular reports, Adal, there's a lightning storm. I didn't pay attention in science class. Are you safe from lightning when wearing all gold?

I don't know. I don't know either. Let's see what happens. RocketMoney.com slash Riddle.

Hi, I'm Nicole Byer, host of Why Won't You Date Me here on HeadGum. On my show, I talk a lot about love and dating, but one important thing that doesn't get talked about enough is our sexual health. That's why I'm so excited to partner with Care for the Culture, sponsored by Gilead Sciences. Care for the Culture is an amazing movement focused on helping normalize conversations around HIV prevention in Black communities. And we're doing this without shame, fear, or judgment, because knowing your HIV prevention options, getting tested, and having honest conversations with your partners shouldn't feel awkward. It should feel empowering. Care for the Culture is all about keeping it real, Taking care of yourself and your people and making sexual health a normal part of everyday conversation. Whether you're actively dating in these streets, in a relationship, or somewhere in between, having information and support matters. You can go on their site and find tips on breaking the ice and getting the conversation started. We are building a whole new generation of daters with no shame and no stigma. So go get informed. Learn more about HIV prevention, testing, and how to start the conversation at carefortheculture.com and speak with your healthcare provider.

Hey Riddle Riddle. All right, let's do this. Let's fucking crush these.

Well, that coffee hit your bloodstream right quick. Oh my goodness.

Yeah.

Oh yeah, baby. Coffee's in needles now, Erin. That's why you have to be very careful.

In the name of beauty and staying young forever.

They need to have like a like a Botox opposite that's like short use for all of the celebrities that do too much Botox and then it's not celebrities I mean actors all the actors that do too much Botox and then lose control of any facial reaction muscles I think that they need to like shoot them with coffee or something that loosens them up just for the day and then they can go back to being you know What's up?

Leave your face alone!

Yeah, just do whatever you want. Leave the face.

We need the face. Have it move at least. Keep your laugh lines. Do it for me. Keep your laugh lines for me.

Casey says that is almost kind of a real thing, right, where they time the Botox shots to be between work because it softens a bit after a while. Whoa. Oh, interesting.

Thanks, Casey, for being Hollywood Watch.

OK, Casey. Now I'm going to have to look at Casey. His camera's off, but I'm like, this guy knows too much about Botox for him to not be a practitioner himself.

A ton of work done. Casey with a ton of work done. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Casey tiny. Casey tiny of work done. Casey ton of work done.

Here's our first one. In other words, maintain your snout to be sanitary.

Keep your nose clean.

You got it, Erin.

Keep your nose clean.

Keep your nose clean.

Do we know the etymology of keep your nose clean? Do we know why?

Fascinating by that, but I don't know what that means or why it means that.

I do want to see a scene. The two of you are in medieval England and this is sort of the origin of that being like a really necessary thing to tell people.

Right. What? What's on your face?

What's on my face? Normal. Normal stuff that's on everyone's face. Shit. Dirt. Bits of bread. Let's see. Hair. Blood. Lot of blood.

There's something missing. Are you alright? It's not a thing on your face. It's a lacquer thing. What is it? Is this skin?

Are you nagging me? Are you inventing nagging?

Well, my name is Elizabeth Neg, is it not?

I don't know. I don't know your name, miss, but I'd like to. You're clean! Hold on. Hold on. You're clean!

No, no, no.

I'm not clean. I'm not clean. No, I've got everything normal on my face, like dirt and piss and shit and bugs.

Smells like lemons and linens and... You took a bath!

He took a bath! He took a bath! Bath? What? No! He took a bath! He took a bath! He took a bath! Keep your voice down. I didn't take a bath. Okay. Okay. You bath taker. Shut up about my bath. I did. I took a bath. It feels f***ing wonderful. Okay?

That makes you sick. We stay healthy and live long lives if we don't get clean.

I thought so too. That's why I took a bath. It was a moment of despair. I wanted to die. And I said, this is how I do it. I take a bath and then the Grim Reaper comes and touches me with his bony skeletal finger. But it didn't happen. I feel great. I feel like 10 pounds lighter.

I feel like free, I feel like I have, I finally got a good... William Clorox, I swear, if you start some sort of trend in this direction, I'll be mean to you until it gets you to fall in love with me, so help me.

Well, I am married already because I'm 15, but... Off with her head! Classic.

Classic.

Classic people being named after the products that eventually... What if Clorox was like, yeah, Clorox, we are 700 years old. We're a company that is 700 years old.

Are there any companies that are 700 years old?

Zest.

Pepsi.

Johnson & Johnson, I think.

What's like the oldest company? Chef Boyardee.

The oldest company. Now here's the thing, and this isn't the oldest company, but it's always surprising to me when you find out like Nintendo has been around since like the 1800s. And it's like, wait, Nintendo? And it's like, yeah, they used to make playing cards and then they, you know, spun off into video games and stuff. So.

Casey says the company of good friends. Casey, you've got to stop. Tomato.

Tomato.

I was going to be like Dutch East Trading Company. Trading Company. They're probably not around no more, huh?

I'm looking at the Wikipedia of list of oldest companies and would you believe it?

There's a lot of them in places that aren't America. Wow. Now, there claims to be, now I don't know if this can be corroborated, but the oldest company looks to be a construction company in Japan called Kongo Gumi. I may be mispronouncing it. And it says it's from the year 578. Now there's also a hotel from the year 705 in Japan That looks to be, yeah, it looks to be an existing hotel that was founded 1,321 years ago.

Can you imagine Erin being like Lisa Kanga Jumi and you're like the only child and you're like, you know what? Fashion. And they're like, honey, please.

We are literally on internet lists. You wouldn't even believe how many lists we're on on the internet. When people Google oldest companies, it's us.

Please go into construction.

I just want to dance. No you don't. No you don't.

Can you dance in a building? In Japan, there is a word for a business that has been in operation for at least a hundred years, some more than a thousand years, and it's shinise, S-H-I-N-I-S-E, and it translates to long-established business, and they are prestigious in Japan. It'd be so cool to be from a country with a fucking history and not like ours that's got a not very good history.

What do you mean? I feel like poking around Japan of like, oh, what should I do in like Kyoto? They'll be like, oh, here's a place that's been selling and making candy for 400 years and you stop and you're like, What? What's that now? You're like, I've been to a Denny's that's been around since the 50s, but that's maybe the oldest thing in America I've been to.

Guys, this hotel in Japan was founded in 705 that is, as of this year, 1,321 years old. I'm pleased as punch to let you guys know that the hotel has password-free Wi-Fi. Wow.

Well of course Wi-Fi slid for something else back then. JPC, can you quickly do a quick Google search of how long Oxford has been around because I fear that my statement of Oxford is older than the Aztec Empire is cartoonishly wrong.

I will say that Oxford University in this Wikipedia article is cited several times, but just the university like dating things, but Oxford University is not listed as one of like the oldest things and they go back to, the oldest goes back to things that were from 1699. So I don't know about Oxford being the oldest. Let's see, how old is Oxford? I don't know. It doesn't seem like it is.

Now, that seems like they're hiding something. If we can't find out when they were founded... Okay, it says there's evidence of teaching as early as 1096, but that doesn't... Whoa!

I don't know if that makes sense.

1096?

The number one thing people ask is, is Oxford older than Aztec? And it says, yes, Oxford University is older than the Pontiac Aztec, which came out in 2007. Oh, wait. So, that's what people... Pontiac Aztec.

This kind of communication makes me go, how does anybody think that a religion that was invented thousands of years ago hasn't been sort of misinterpreted? You guys, I can't even make it, Pat, through two guys. Boys will be boys. What are we doing?

All right, fine, Erin. Let's just see you do any better.

Okay, let's Google something. Tell me anything, I will convey the information accurately to you. Ask me about anything.

Is religion correct?

Let's see.

Let's do... Which religion is the right religion?

Depends on your definition of truth.

Okay.

There's contradictory claims, if you can believe it. Huh.

What about, okay, can you Google, okay, so you can Google, I can make Erin Google anything that I want. What about Famke Jansen hug controversy? Oh!

No.

What about, who's the woman who sings TikTok?

Oh, Kesha.

What about Kesha Seinfeld hug controversy? Google that. Erin, do you know about this?

What are the other hug controversies that we can trick Erin to Google?

The Kesha one is so uncomfortable, but she had the last laugh, did she not?

I think so. Oh yeah.

Did she?

I think so.

Oh man. Okay, I think that we should do riddles because I can't think of a hug controversy.

How about, here's another, in other words, recompense from within to out of the snout? Recompense from within to without from the snout? Recompense from within to out? Not on the nose. Erin, very close. You said not on the nose?

Something on the nose.

Very, very close. Out of the nose.

Give out the mouth.

Recompense.

Don't nose the mouth that feeds you.

Give with the mouth, but take with the nose.

Recompense. So this is going to be the transference of money.

Paid out the mouth. I paid out the mouth for this ass.

Or something out the nose.

Yeah, combine those two ideas. Oh, I paid out the nose. Pay out the nose. Pay through the nose.

Which means you're paying way too much, right?

Yeah, I think so.

Do you think that literally happened to someone and this is why we have that phrase?

Yes. Some men gave all, all men gave nose. Huh. Hold on. I'm not stupid. You guys treat me like I'm stupid and I'm not. You guys treat me like I'm stupid, but I'm smart. I'm not stupid like everyone says.

Some men gave all, all men gave no.

I just feel like I watched someone try to attempt to do a backflip after not practicing doing a backflip, didn't land it, and then got super hostile to everyone in the room.

Okay, I do need to see... JPC, I'm so sorry to do this to you. Erin's going to help you out on this, but this is going to be... This is like Ken Burns' documentary voiceover, and you did not sleep the night before, so you did not sort of go over the script at all. So you're just trying to make up facts as you go along, and this is for the Civil War. And Erin, you're sort of the voiceover director, and you have to chime in to kind of help out everyone.

Okay, so you'll just roll the footage and I'll read the voiceover. Okay, let's yeah.

And then a lot of what we're going over today is just sort of like love letters back and forth between some soldiers and their wives back at home. So just whenever you're ready. And again, that sort of warm tone that we're trying to that we talked about when we hired you. Awesome. And can I get you a water or anything? I know talking here you look pretty sweaty.

I'm fine. Yeah, I'm a professional so I'm fine. The American Civil War. Sure, we all know the story. Sometime in the spring of 1860s, up until the Spring of later on.

I guess I have two things.

Yes, I'm sorry.

One is, please read the copy in front of you.

In the copy in front of me, okay.

And two is, we can see the reflection.

It just said the Civil War, it didn't have, yeah, it didn't have dates on here, so. Right.

It just read the letters.

So just read the letters.

So, and I would say we can see the reflection of you trying to order Taco Bell from Uber Eats off your phone. We can see it.

The app has me blocked, so I have to go through Uber Eats. I'd rather go through the app, but they have me blocked.

Well, we're going to take lunch in a couple hours. Sure, let's just get into it. And action.

We all know the story of years of intense combat. Brother against brother, father against nephew, cousins at war.

But what about the personal stories of the soldiers who were deeply- We can't take a little bit of throw-up dribble out of post, so just take that part again.

Yeah, of course. But you could take it out of post, so it's not... No, we can't.

We don't have to.

You can't. We cannot.

Yeah, sorry. I should pronunciate. Pronunciation. Pfft. Annunciate. Classic me.

Big flub. Big flub. I'm sorry. If we could just take that again and you say, uh, pronounce.

I'm so sorry.

I'm a little hungover.

And if you could pronounce your words and enunciate a little better.

Sure. Most of the soldiers who fought in the Civil War were illiterate, but a select few knew their letters and could use their letters to write back to their sweetheart at home to give them good tidings of What was going on? Like this letter from 1860... Okay, we can see you sending a text.

Oh my gosh, I realized I called you 14 times last night. I know we talked about going no contact for a while. We can see the reflection in the... I know we talked about going no contact for a while.

I'm still typing. I'll type it as you're talking.

Okay, you know what? Yeah.

Drunk actions are sober thoughts, and I really thought maybe now is the time to reconnect.

Am I not allowed to do, if as long as I'm talking, am I not allowed to do two things at once? I mean, I'm talking. I'm saying everything I need to say.

That's a good point. If you could just jump right in from the start of the letter, that would be great.

Professionals don't interrupt as much. Just so you know, I've done all the Dragonfire books. I read that whole series.

We cut to a snippet of the Dragonfire books.

Jacob's heaving penis heaved breathlessly in his pantaloons.

Hey, you're leaving this on a voicemail for me. We talked about going no contact, okay? See, you're not contacting me.

You're contacting Jacob from the Dragonfire books.

I'll tell you what. I'll tell you one thing I know for certain. If I buy an audiobook and it starts with Jacob, I'm turning it off. If you make Jacob a 22 syllable word, I am not continuing.

All right, fine, read it. Someone knows how to read. Okay, cool, so you better than half the people in the Civil War. Great.

Rag. It would be funny, Civil War letters, and it's like a woman writing this beautiful, poetic, sort of 10-page letter to her husband at war, and then him writing back and realizing he doesn't know how to write.

Maybe I'll just put my handprint and I'll draw a turkey. She'll love that. Ladies love turkeys.

It's just a picture. She gets it back. It's just a picture of a turkey with a flag or something. She's like, what the hell? It's a bunch of just like shapes. My husband. Triangles and stars and squares and stuff up in the corner.

What's that on the fridge? My husband's at war. And Erin, your rap persona is LLT, Ladies Love Turkey.

Ladies Love Turkey. And it goes something like this. I'm not going to rap. Don't worry everybody.

I think my rap name is Ladies Love Cool James. And a friend is like, maybe we just do LL Cool James. Maybe that's a little smoother. Here we go. Here's another, in other words. Okay. Water source of formative years.

Water source, river, lake, stream.

River of childhood.

Ocean of youth.

Fountain of youth.

There you go, Erin. Got it.

I'm such a fucking idiot. I said river of childhood. I'm going to fucking, I can't even fucking believe how dumb I was just now in front of all these people. This is so vulnerable to be this dumb in front of this many people. I'm sitting at my house, I'm minding my business, I'm trying to live my life, and I have to log on to be this dumb in front of all of you? Do you understand how horrible this is?

Erin's older than the Aztecs. Erin, some men gave nos.

I know, I'm just saying. Some men gave nos. I know, and I know that you guys also feel that. I'm talking to people who I think should have empathy for me here. Isn't this just so horrible sometimes to be this vulnerably dumb in front of people? You two not as much as me. My hit rate for dumbness is way higher, of course.

No, I got it.

Okay, I'd like to see a scene.

Okay.

Yeah, please. JPC, you are someone going to the Fountain of Youth. Adal, you're the fountain. And Adal, you think that JPC is so old that you're not even able to help. Like it's not even worth it.

After so many years of searching, I finally found it. The Fountain of Youth. Now to taste the cool waters and transform into the man of my youth. Hey, listen.

You have found... Oh no. Oh, hello?

Oh, the fountain. You're talking to me. I'm just going to take a quick sip, if that's okay.

Hold up, hold up. Don't dip that old glove. Don't dip that old glove into the... Of course. My water's tainting it.

We should talk. We should talk. We should talk ground rules or whatever, because you're going to give me, you know, youth or whatever. I don't want to be too young.

Yeah, I don't think we have to worry about that.

Listen, my... Because my wife is quite a bit younger than me, but not... Can I see a picture? I don't want to be younger than her. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to go down too... I don't want to make her... Pedophile. If you know what I'm saying.

Would you believe that's the first time someone's said that word at the Fountain of Youth? So you're on the board, buddy.

That's good. Right? That's gotta be good if it's the first time someone's said pedophile at the Fountain of Youth.

I don't think it's good. Good for you. Why? How?

I said it. How? It'd be bad if a bunch of people were here saying pedophile, right?

Hey, listen, we... We here at the Fountain, uh... That's a good question too, Fountain of Youth.

Like if I drink the water and I become a little boy, and then I have a consensual... Get this guy out of here.

Why are you still engaging in this? I'm trying. I'm trying. Don't be polite with people this messed up.

...sexual relationship with my wife, who's 40 years younger than me, but you know, at that point... Oh my God, get him out of here. ...is she a pedophile or I'm actually... It's like the person from... It's like the movie Big. Right?

We're unfamiliar. We've only seen Splash. We've only seen Splash.

I don't think there's a pedophile in Splash.

Get out of here, man.

Stop saying that. Hey, let me take a drink, okay?

No. No.

Come on.

No. You need to go to the... We've never been drier. Get out of here. You need to go to the Middle Age Waterfalls. I just think...

It's rude and actually counterproductive to not let people drink out of the Fountain of Youth because they said the word pedophile. That's like people turning off a podcast because someone says the word cunt. Even if it makes sense in context, you know?

Thanks Adal and JPC. A little bit of a delay over here for me, Erin, on Cunt Watch. We are up to another cunt from JPC. Of JPC. I'm here with JPC to talk about how he just said the word cunt on a podcast. JPC?

Actually, that was a character. So that's the fun thing about improv.

Was it? Your voice sort of sounded similar.

Well, I sound a little younger. Okay, Erin, come on.

You have kind of the same energy you do now.

Oh yeah, I'm that pedophile guy, that's what you're saying? You're saying I have a pedophile energy?

Casey, clip that.

Back to you, Adal.

I think that's a good time to go on another little break. You mean like for the podcast, like take a year off or something?

Like Adal and I get like a year off?

Think about how we got here. We'll be right back.

This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Oh, guys, I ate too much website. Oh, I ate too much website. I think I'm going to be sick.

Ah, GPC.

I know, I just couldn't help myself. It was so delicious. Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place.

And I had to JPC, I hope you left room for videos, because Squarespace makes it easy to showcase your expertise and engage clients with video content on your website. Upload and organize your videos, create stunning video libraries, and even monetize your content by adding a paywall, perfect for online courses, exclusive tutorials, and premium workshops. And it's coming right up, so JPC, I hope you left room.

Don't say coming right up, Erin.

Oh, I ate so much website. No, no, no. Hold it down. Hold it. Hey, JBC, calm down. We'll just tell your mother that we ate the websites. Listen. Classic. With Squarespace.com, we'll keep making you new ones to eat with delicious cutting edge design. You know that Squarespace has cutting edge design tools. Anyone can build a beautiful, tasty, scrumptious professional online presence that perfectly fits their brand or business.

And you can get discovered fast with integrated Squarespace SEO tools. Every website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions, an auto-generated site map, and more. So you show up more often in search engines and bring in more of your ideal customers. That sounds delicious. Maybe I'll have some.

Wow. And enough time has passed. I feel like I could eat some more. And if you could eat some more, head to squarespace.com slash riddle for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Squarespace does not approve of eating the websites. You should not eat the websites. You can't eat the websites. What are they talking about?

Hey Riddle Riddle

Guys, I just made you my favorite new drink. It's called a Summer Sandy. So, it's basically, are you familiar with a shandy? Like half beer, half lemonade? It's a shandy, half beer, half lemonade, but half sand.

Looks like the sand absorbed all the beer.

Yes, and it's very clumpy and it's not wet. Getting on my teeth. Oh, good. Yes, then that's the feeling that you're going for.

Oh, Erin, it's very clumpy. Eddie Murphy? Is our guest Eddie Murphy?

I think it might be Sandy.

No, it's Gritty.

Oh, even better.

The Eddie Murphy of mascots. You didn't know what he sounded like. It's me. Sounds like me.

That would be quite funny.

It would be hilarious. I remember being overseas a long, long time ago as a kid and seeing my name on a menu. And I think it was, it was like they misspelled shandy or that's how they said it in the country. I was like, oh, great. What's that? And they're like, beer and lemonade. I was like, no thanks.

Not this time.

Not this time. Very good. Yeah.

Now I do. I've never been a big shandy guy and I don't drink anymore. But even when I did, I was like, I don't, I don't think I'm a big combination drinks guy. I think I like, I don't like it when people get too like,

Coming with each other. Like your arm separated from your palmar.

Exactly.

Well, speaking of mixing things up, that's it. I don't know if anything can do with that. Great transition. That felt great.

Fucking phenomenal.

Speaking of fucking things up, I have a game. So I'm sure we're all familiar with the improv game where you're given a prompt and you have to tell the audience how sex with you is like that thing. Of course. We are going to do that in reverse, so to speak. I'm going to give you a bunch of clues. Hey, I love that.

I guess so.

Oh, great. I love it.

Okay.

This is fun. This is great. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And there's no wrong answers, except I only have one right answer. So great. You know, yeah, but there's no wrong ones. There's no wrong ones. But the only one right one. Yeah, it's like taxidermy. I got some at a Montana yard sale. Coming to the table of jokes

We're just monsters and we can't not say stuff like this.

No, it's great. I actually wanted to do it. Okay. Sex with me is like blank because, and I'll give you one and give you a chance to guess. And then if you don't get it, I'll give you another. And I have up to three or four for each one. Sex with me is like taxidermy. It takes six to eight hours at the ice. Never look right. Sex with me is like blank. It's very sandy.

The beat?

The beach. Sex with me is like the beach. It's very sandy. That works.

That's not what I had in mind. Like I said, no wrong answers. Except for one.

Set your hourglass. What else is sandy? Breece? Is it Sandor? Is it just you? It's just me. All of these are me.

It's just about sex with me.

The planet from Dune.

Oh, Arrakis. Sadly, that is correct. I can't even give you my second clue, Erin. Sex with me is like Arrakis? Nice. Sex with me is like Dune because when you put your hand in my box, it'll hurt like hell.

Sex with me is like Dune because we reuse fluids.

Holy shit.

Is that what they do in Dune? I'm starting to feel very self-conscious.

Sex with me is like Dune because after we do it, you'll Zediah.

Yeah.

I couldn't think of any others. That was it for me on Dune. Sex with me is like blank because there's lots of teabagging.

American Revolution.

The United Kingdom? Nope. Sex and Bees Like Blank because a pussy is going to be very happy.

The last one I have for that one is, a furry is going to come, but not for a while.

I want to think of one for Alice in Wonderland. Yeah. Fuck. Fuck. I'm going to think of one in the middle of the night. Okay, hold on. You guys do them and then I will do mine.

The whole time Erin is just pencil to paper.

Can I say something about my rabbit hole?

Should we wait for Erin or keep going?

Um, on birthday, you're late. I'm gonna tell you you're late the whole time.

Oh yeah, being late, that was a good one too.

We definitely need Erin for this. We have to let Erin finish.

Oh, sex with me is like Alice in Wonderland because I have no problem having sex with my Red Queen. Put down a towel.

Sex with me is like blank because the sheets are gonna get messy. Wawa.

Wawa?

That's awesome. Sheetz is a local, uh, Pennsylvania? It's like a Wawa-esque gas station, right? Oh, got it. They're the ones that are competition. It's like blank because we try to find balance, but it rarely works. Microsoft suite? Microsoft Word?

Try to find balance, but it... Okay, the sheets are gonna get messy and we try to find balance?

Yeah. Quotuaries. Yeah, yeah, bookkeeping. Bookkeeping. Bookkeeping. Got another one?

Uh, sex with me is like bookkeeping, I'm always in the red. There you go. Uh, god, what am I, sex with me is like bookkeeping, uh... Um... Uh... Oh, sex with... No, that's not, never mind. Sex with me is like bookkeeping, you're gonna see pee, eh? Uh, sex with me is like bookkeeping, I excel at it. There you go.

Sex with me is like Alice in Wonderland. Nothing is the right size.

Sex with me is like blank because there's lots of railing. Balcony? Skateboarding. It is skateboarding. Erin, you're too good at this. You don't give me time to get to my second and third ones. Sex with me is like a skate park. You're gonna find someone riding goofy. Sex with me is like a skate park.

You're gonna have to wear elbow pads.

You're gonna ride me until you're tired or you break a bone. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Sex with me is like blank. There's a very stiff man. Sex with me is like blank. I want you to come in fancy clothes.

A wedding?

Sex with me is like blank. Jack Nicholson is there for some reason.

Oh, the movie Anger Management.

Stiff man, fancy clothes. It's always being watched by Jack Nicholson.

Oh, oh, yeah. Is it the Knicks? Is that what he watches?

He watches the Lakers, but I don't know what the stiff man would be. It's the Oscars. Oh, the Oscars. Give me an Oscars one.

Sex With Me is like the Oscars. There's going to be a grouch there.

Nice. Sex With Me is like the Oscars. You have to campaign for it.

Sex With Me is like the Oscars. I'm buttoned up in the streets, but I'm a freak in the streeps.

Sex With Me is like the Oscars. Conan O'Brien hosts and no one appreciates it in the moment.

Sex With Me is like the Oscars. It's an honor to be nommed. It's so white.

Sex With Me is like the Oscars. I'd be nothing without my production staff. I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about.

I'm still thinking about Alice in Wonderland, you guys.

Of course you are. Of course you are.

Sex With Me is like blank. Someone's gonna suck.

Dyson, Hoover, vacuum.

And thanks for watching.

Thank you for watching. Yeah. We're going to hang upside down.

He already said something about suck, but I want to do something about sookie. Sookie.

Sex with me is like a vampire. I can't see myself in a mirror.

Yeah. That's awesome. Huh.

Sex with me is like a vampire. You don't have to be dead to do it, but it helps. You're under arrest.

Dead to enjoy it? Sex with me is like a vampire. It's only with people who are like a hundred and something years old.

Sex with me is like a vampire. I'm always coughing.

Nice! There we go.

Alright. Sex with me is like blank because someone will use a whip.

Indiana Jones.

It is Indiana Jones. Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. It'll melt your face. And sex with me is like Indiana Jones. Every time you say my name, I'll think you're talking about my dad.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. Me and my dad fucked the same Nazi.

There we go. Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. Why'd it have to be sex?

Sex with me is like a vampire. It sucks.

There we go, Erin.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. You think you're not gonna get it at the last second and then you do.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. I learned... I got it from the dog.

You're going to be running away from a giant ball?

Yeah, yeah. Oh, there's something with giant ball that could be very appealing.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. But in Latin, sex starts with a J. We smoke weed before we have sex.

Sex with me is like Indiana Jones. The second one won't be very good.

Oh, yeah.

Sex with me is like a vampire. I only come at night.

Only come at night. Very good.

Very good. I only come at night. Very good.

Sex with me is like blank. There's a monkey involved for some reason.

Indiana Jones.

Friends. Chilled monkey brain. Goddammit, Erin. Sorry. Sex with me is like Friends. There's a monkey involved for some reason. You'll be mad if we take a break. And you'll be dreaming of Tom Selleck the whole time.

Sex with me is like Friends. Could I be wearing any more clothes? We're all running towards it. We're all running towards it. And I got there first and I ran right past you, Adal, and I grabbed the back of your ankle and I ripped.

I was running towards sex with me is like friends. Pivot.

Pivot. Pivot.

Oh, see I had sex with me is like friends. What am I doing? That rocks.

That's good.

Sex with me is like friends. Paul Rudd's there near the end.

There has to be some version of like, I Phoebe on my Chandler till I Ross or something like that. I don't have the combination of it, but there's something there.

We're always going in each other's apartments. We're always coming in each other's apartments.

Sex with me is like blank, I'll beg you for more

Oliver Twist.

It is Oliver Twist.

Why is this the only one I've ever been good at?

Sex with me is like Oliver Twist. I'll beg you for more and you'll put your dick in. That's all I got. I don't know anything else about Oliver Twist.

Sex with me is like Oliver Twist. I get paid per the word, per word.

Okay.

I wanted to do something with Fagin. I'll let you do it. Something with orphan? Is there something with orphan in it? I don't know. I fucking don't know.

I'll artfully dodge your calls after.

I like that, Erin.

Yay.

Sex with me is like blank. I'll demand that you stroke harder.

Rowing.

Yes, but it's not exactly what I was after. It's the right reference.

Vikings?

Yes, it's Vikings. Sex with me is like Vikings. I'll be literally horny and I'll spread my seed all over.

Cold and salty.

This is a stretch, guys. Bear with me here. Sex With Me is like a Viking. You'll be asking, what was the pill age of... I don't... Hey, it's okay.

Rest now. Kisses you on the forehead, tucks you into bed.

Go to bed.

You've done good today. Time to rest.

Okay, that's all we got from Vik. Yeah, go ahead.

No, no, no. Yeah. Long ship.

Sex with me is like blank. It's better when we smash. Burgers. It is burgers. Sex with me is like burgers. You'll squirt all over my bun. And I prefer it from five guys.

Oh, nice. You have to flip me for me to finish.

Oh, very good.

Wendy's is technically better, but I'm cheaper.

I'm

I'm

Ew, where? What? Where? Don't worry about it.

Don't worry about it.

Where?

You're going to like it. You could have said ring and that would have been enough. You're like, no, I'm going to make an onion ring. Sex with me is like Hey Riddle Riddle. Erin's going to get pissed off. Yep. Sex with me is like blank. Everyone lies about how big it is. Fishing? Yeah. Wow. Sex with me is like fishing. Put on something sparkly and I'll come.

Nice.

It starts with a line and ends with the hooks coming out.

Sex with me is like fishing. Peaceful.

Sex with me is like fishing. I never catch anything, condoms.

Sex with me is like fishing. Whatever you do, don't click my links.

That's nice.

PH. I'm trying to think of a certain fish. Oh, yeah. Sex with me is like fishing. I might carp the bed.

Carp-a-feel?

Carp-a-feel! Carp-a-feel is good.

Carp-a-feel is really nice. What do you do after carp-a-feel when someone says that?

Yeah, carp-a-feel is really nice. I like the way that carp-a-feels.

Coming out of your mouth?

Sex with me is like fishing. It smells like fish. Sometimes it's important.

Oh! Sex with me is like fishing. I'm gonna tackle that box.

That's awesome. That's awesome.

Sex with me is like fishing. I only do it with Annette.

Oh yeah.

He was a friend of mine named Annette.

That's nice for Annette.

Yeah, it's good for Annette. Alright, sex with me is like blank. Lots of angry bitches.

A dog pound.

A dog vent. Close. Kennel? Closer. Lots of angry bitches, lots of hungry pussies. Animal shelter? Yeah, closer. It's someone stra- The vet. Yeah, the vet. Someone strapping- The vet. Someone strapping me to a table to probe me with a piece of metal.

Okay, sex with the vet. Okay, that's very nice.

You want me to cut my nails before. Oh.

Sex with me is like the vet.

Oh, if it goes wrong, if it goes wrong, you're going to want to go to sleep. Sex with me is like a vet of the other kind. Thank you for your cervix.

A couple times a year, you're going to want to come in.

I think that's stolen valor, Adal. No. If I thank someone for their cervix. What'd you say, JPC?

I said a couple times you're gonna want to come in me for shots. Let's just let that sink in.

I like that one.

All right. Sex with me is like blank. You won't understand what's happening till you're older. Twin Peaks.

Is it a movie?

A father's advice.

Sex with me is like blank. I'm always happy to play bottom. Oh, Midsummer Night's Dream. Shakespeare. And the girl parts are always played by guys.

Nice. Give me 40 minutes.

Okay. Sex with me is like Shakespeare. You'll be taming my shrew.

Much a goo about nothing. Wow.

Goo about nothing is very good. Sex with me is like Shakespeare. Exit pursued by a bear.

Uh... Alas, poor soft dick, I knew ye well. Soft dick.

Um, everyone dies in the end.

We'll always be asking to pee or not to pee. A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse, cock. Jesus Christ. A comedy of errors.

Oh, it's 12, uh, 12 nights. It's, um...

Um, hand me my longsword, ho. Sex with me is like Shakespeare. When I'm done, people thought I was eight different guys.

You'll get a pound of flesh.

Oh, oh yeah. Sex with me is like Shakespeare. I'm like the merchant of penis.

Oh, I'll bite my thumb.

There we go.

Merchant of Penis is insane, by the way.

Oh, Sex With Me is like Shakespeare. They call me Bottom the Lever.

Nice.

Because I bottom and then I go. Sex With Me is like Shakespeare.

I go.

I'm going to head out.

Parting is such sweet sorrow.

I'm If you prick me, do I not bleed?

Kenneth Branagh makes me understand it. It's double toil and trouble. There's three witches there.

Erin, you're done.

I'm done.

We've got to do another one, Sandy. Let's go on.

Sex with me is like blank, you're going to see some tits. Burlesque? Tits. Sex with me is like blank, you're going to see some cocks.

A farm.

A zoo? A shitty zoo. Is it Lake Titicaca? Sex with me is like blank. You might witness a swallow if you're lucky.

Birdwatching.

Birdwatching. Birdwatching.

Sex with me is like birdwatching. I'm robbing you.

Sex with me is like birdwatching. I love your huge noculars.

That's awesome.

Sex with me is like birdwatching. The elderly really enjoy coming.

Can I go?

Sex with me is like birdwatching. I'm a hobby for perverts.

Oh God. I don't know enough about birdwatching.

You can identify it by the sounds I make. Something about a woodpecker.

Oh, sex with me is like birdwatching. You're going to egret it.

Aww.

The self-deprecating ones are fun. Come on.

Let's move on. Sex with me is like blank. It's covered in cream. Eric Clapton reunion concert? Wow. Uh, Derek and the Dominoes. Dessert. I know. Sex with me is like blank. The Jews do it best. I don't want to say.

Careful. Covered in cream and the Jews do it best.

All right, last one.

Seder?

There's a hole and then you eat it.

Donut?

Bagels.

Bagels.

Bagels.

Sex with me is like a bagel. Better in New York.

There you go.

Sex with me is like a bagel.

It's all about the water.

Exactly what you want when you're hungover.

Mm-hmm.

God.

Oh, sex with me is like a bagel. You just tell me how you like it spread.

Yeah. Nice. I'll put everything on it. I'll put everything on it.

Sex with me? Oh, please. No, I got two more. Let's do two more. Let's do two more.

Okay. Sex with me is like blank somebody's getting fingered.

A line up.

It's the usual suspects.

I was going to say, I'm Kaiser So-So.

Kaiser So-So!

I love it!

I like Kaiser So-So so much.

There's your tattoo, JPC. I like Geyser So-So, says no one ever.

Alright, last one. Sex with me is like blank. Somebody's getting crabs. Somebody's a virgin. And you'll think it means something, but it doesn't.

Virgin crabs? Is this like a red lobster? Nope.

Somebody's getting crabs. Someone's a virgin. And you'll think it means something, but it doesn't. Welcome to

on the show. Where can people find you and the work that you do?

Sex With Me is like my game, Rattle.

It's an anagram of something more interesting.

You can do it every day.

You can do it every day.

We're using the latter as a metaphor. It involves some kind of play before a word. I'm I also make puzzles at Mystery League as part of my business, which I do for corporate team building and other things. So if you're looking for more puzzles in your life, get in touch. And probably some other cool stuff that I can't talk about, but that's what it is.

Well, Sandy, sex with me is like the episode being over and you leaving the show because... It's sad.

Oh, it's sad.

That's very true.

It's very true.

Bye, Sandy.

Bye, Sandy.

Peace. Erin, JBC. Erin, is there anything you'd like to plug or promote?

I want to plug our Patreon, patreon.com slash heyridlariddle. Lots of fun stuff happening over there. Some ad-free versions of our early episodes that JPC has been working hard to get posted. We didn't used to have them there and now they're there and we're really excited about that. And lots of fun reviews, lots of fun games, lots of fun live streams, just fun stuff going on over there. Adal, anything to plug or promote?

I would like to plug, if you are someone who happens to be buying a horse, or maybe you raise and breed horses, I would like to plug naming one of the horses Doctors in the Moonlight. Doesn't have to go into horse racing, but I think it's just a fun little thing. If you have a horse and you name it Doctors in the Moonlight, and to show how gracious of hosts we are, you could even ascribe that name to a lesser animal. Say your dogs or your cats.

I think we should hold that for horse. I think we're worth it. I think we hold that for horse. And I will also say, if you're one of those people that raises horses to turn them into food, we, well all three of us, will eat Doctors in the Moonlight on stream.

No, dibs.

Erin, we have to.

No, I'm saying I'm doing that alone. Every girl's dream.

Erin's going to Kobayashi a horse on the stream.

Dip it in water first. Help soften it.

And I love where we're going as a country. Back to you.

JPC, anything to plug or promote or a review to read?

Hey, let me read a review. It's been a while. So this one is a five-star review from Rabidicus. This is a 5-star review. You can get your review featured by leaving a 5-star review anywhere you leave reviews. This one's called Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Automobile Wheel. Let's see if JPCO still got it. You know what? I almost did, but I... You fumbled on the funniest part at the end.

That was amazing. Perfect.

Automobile Wheel. That's great.

Well, hot dogs to all who celebrate.

How many parents in the music?

Hey there, snakes and spiders. If you liked that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. We go into the Scene Suggestion channel in the Discord and take your scene suggestions. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com. Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the clue for $5 a month or start your seven day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month and get those ad free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gum podcast.