Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum Podcast.

Psst.

Psst. Adal.

Adal.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's me. It's Erin. I'm under the disguise. It's me. What?

This is a tree.

No, no, no. It's me. I'm Erin.

Okay, tree. If you're Erin, tell me something only Erin would know.

Oh my God, what do I know? Do I really know anything for sure? I don't know if I'm sure about anything.

Oh, Adal. Hey, thanks for meeting me. Okay. Oh, this is perfect timing, man, because I really gotta rip a piss. Uh, do you mind if I hit this tree up or?

Yeah, go for it. Hey, you should know this tree says it's Erin.

Uh, will that ruin it for me? No, I can work with that. Okay. Wait, what? Unzerp. And... Unzerp? Yeah. Unzerp my perps.

Haha, got you. It's me. I'm the tree. Oh, and you were trying to collect my... Oh, I forgot to... I was supposed to collect your pee. Damn it! Is it too late? Pee in my hand.

No, nice try, Erin. You'll have to work a little harder if you want to make a clone of me.

Ah, I got got again. If it wasn't for you grown adults. Well, OK, $8,000 tree costume for nothing, I guess. Unbelievable.

Yeah, what is the adult version of meddling kids? Nosey bitches?

Nosey bitches.

Nosey bitches.

Gossiping jerks.

Adults don't really meddle much anymore. They either shoot everybody at a bank or they go quietly to their work. They're still in between.

I guess I'm also now questioning how old do we think Scoob and the gang were?

We're getting to the point where that's an important question for society.

Because people would say, I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids. Kids to me is, what do we think, anything under 15, 16?

I think if a bunch of 17 year olds are like fucking with me, I'm not like, get out of here you kids. They are like not adults, they're technically children. But like, when I say, if I would say like, I saw some kids, I'm thinking of like grade school kids, like, you know, somewhere in like the first to fifth grade.

Yeah, kids don't wear ascots for it.

Well, not anymore. Yeah, one of them has like facial hair. What do you mean they're like 14? Are they 14?

I guess you could, I mean, some people had facial hair, like not good facial hair when they were like, yeah, 14, 14 for, cause Shaggy, doesn't Shaggy have like a... Shaggy's 14, but he's high for his age. I think he's very high for his age. And also, Scooby-Doo can't be a kid. If you tell me that's a 14-year-old dog, I'm like, that dog's almost dead.

Well, he's a kaiju. There's a surprising amount of kaijus. Mickey Mouse.

Big Bird.

Big Bird. Bugs Bunny.

Hold on. Hold on.

Is this true?

Erin, these are the most powerful magical creatures in our universe.

In our universe.

In our universe. Adal, you listed three of those things before. In my mind, I was like, oh yeah, a kaiju is that thing from Pacific Rim where there's two people piloting it. And then I was like, no, the kaiju is the other. I thought in my mind when you were listing those, I was like, yeah, there's like two people inside of Mickey Mouse.

Two little guys operating Bugs Bunny. One for the carrot, one for the mouth.

One for the carrot, two for the mouth. All right, y'all, that's right. Yeah, I love 2000's most dev.

Adal, JPC, step into my office.

Okay.

This is like a kiddie pool.

Mind the gap.

Sit down.

Oh, interesting.

You would call this a kiddie pool? See, I would say that this is like a teenager pool.

Yeah, what age is this pool? I have an important question.

Uh-huh.

How are you?

What's going on here?

How are you?

Can I tell you honestly, Erin? Can I tell you honestly how I am?

Yes.

So at the time of recording this, a freak fucking accident of nature. I mean, nothing that I planned, this is just the way my life unfolded, happened to me. Where there were three days in a row, where I went to a diner and got an omelette. Now.

None of that sounds like an accident. That sounds like an active thing you've decided to do.

I'm not an every day of the week diner guy. That's not who I am. I'd love to be that. That's actually who I aspire to be. That's the version of me that, like, when I close my eyes and think about, that's who I am. But that's not the guy that I am. I also, I don't, I can't eat a whole omelette. So I'm taking half of an omelette home every time I order one.

An omelette to go?

Yeah, I'm a waste not want not guy. I love a leftover.

Even with an omelette?

With an omelette, yeah. An omelette heats up pretty well in the oven.

What? Okay, okay.

How many eggs are in this omelette?

I mean, these are big omelettes. These are not small omelettes. There are some omelettes that I can eat, but like a diner omelette, like a classic diner omelette.

Omelettes starting to sound like a fake word the more we say it.

This is three separate diners. These are not the same diners. These are scattered to all corners of the earth.

Three separate diners?

Do you think when Vin Diesel eats an omelette, it's called a domelette? Yeah, it's called a domelette. And the secret ingredient is family.

Uh, in my fridge right now, well this morning I should say, I had three leftover omelets. Now I know. I gotta be eating these omelettes, but I can only really have them for breakfast. So I have to have like one a day. But now I'm thinking, should I eat these in the order that I purchased them? That's the smart thing to do because that's how they're going to go bad. But also, they were from three separate diners. Some of them are better than other ones. So do I eat like the best one first? Do I eat the worst one first? Completely fucked up my whole day. I mean, what a fucking horrible decision to have to make.

This is a riddle. This is like the lady and the tiger or whatever.

This is like the Lady and the Tiger. I love that movie. What would you guys do in that situation? Which omelette are you eating first?

I would never be in this situation. What are you talking about? Getting an omelette three days in a row is so crazy. And what do you mean it didn't scratch your itch for an omelette the first day?

Okay, so you're saying I'm at the diner. I'm already at the diner on the second day.

Diner one, day one.

Omelette.

You're craving an omelette. You get an omelette. You can't finish it. That's fine. You bring it home. Fridge.

And is this Cozy Corner?

One of them was. One of them was Cozy Corner, which by the way, my favorite omelette of the three.

Okay.

Day two.

Day two, wake up. If I'm craving an omelette, I'm actually going to get really upset. I feel like I'm my teacher about to get hot. Day two, I'm craving an omelette. I go to my refrigerator where I have leftover omelette in my refrigerator.

Nobody said anything about craving. I told you, these were not plans. These were accidental happenings of the universe.

Day two, why are you freaking out? Why didn't you wake up and eat the omelette you already had in your refrigerator?

Can I tell you? My wife had an early doctor's appointment, so I drove my wife to the doctor's appointment. And then after she had the doctor's appointment, there was a diner across the street and she was hungry. So we went to get the omelette. Again, nothing that I planned. And she was not with me the first day. It was just me and my kid at the diner the first day.

But why get something that's not an omelette at the second diner knowing you have omelette at home?

Because, I'll be honest, I'm not a sweets-for-breakfast type of guy.

There's other options. That's not the only savory option.

It's the only savory option for a vegetarian. Chilaquiles? It was not... Adal, this was like for Tyler, like Norwood Park. There were no chilaquiles on the menu.

And then third day, you go, oh, I'm going to wake up and have my two leftover omelets.

Third day, now hold on, the third day was Saturday, on Saturdays we go out to breakfast. That's what we do in this house. That one, that one is set in stone. That one's non-negotiable.

I think what you do, I think, yeah, I think you make like a Frankenstein omelette, where you cut each one into thirds. We'll see you next time.

And then I, okay, yeah, no.

No, I don't want to give you any sort of real advice here, because I don't want to encourage you to keep doing something like this. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. You're just going to go and get omelette without eating your leftover omelette every day?

Well, now I'm in three days of omelette. Like, I did three days of omelette and now I'm in another three days of omelette where I'm eating leftover omelette. So yes, today, this morning, I had some omelette.

And then it's going to bump up against your Saturday breakfast, and then you're going to have omelette again?

I mean, I'm truly living in a prison of my own making, but I got to say, the breakfast in prison, not bad. It's all omelette, baby. And I'm fine.

Yes, and Adal, how are you?

What are you getting at a diner, Erin?

Well, if I'm going to a diner three days in a row, I'm trying to mix it up.

Hit me with three breakfast orders, bop, bop, bop. What's your plan?

Okay. Day one, I'm probably going to go for the classic breakfast, where it's two eggs, a protein, toast, hash browns. Day two, I'm going to go for some sort of eggs benedict.

Okay.

Um, hollandaise sauce, hollandaise sauce. Day three, I'm probably kind of tired of going out to eat for breakfast. And I might be doing like ordering a bunch of sides, like I'm getting like a bagel and a side of bacon, like I'm doing piecemeal of whatever I'm craving that day. Or I'm doing like a, uh, Today's episode is

Chilaquiles, number one. Corned beef hash, number two. Okay, corned beef hash. Biscuits and gravy, number three.

Interesting. Okay, yeah.

I love a diner.

The people that can eat meat have so many more options at a diner. I love a vegetarian biscuits and gravy. No diner's ever going to have that. Not like a greasy spoon type of place. Ah, sad times.

Well, enjoy your omelette hell.

Speaking of hell, here's how I'm doing.

Okay.

I decided late last night, and I'm not gonna say names, but I think we have to start tearing these people apart limb by limb. Listen, now hear me out. Again, I'm not specifying who I'm talking about, but I think... Could be someone we know.

Could be someone we don't know personally.

Adal, I'm not saying it's not a good use of your time. Here's just one other thing you could be doing late at night. Yeah, yeah. I'll throw this out. Sleeping.

No, don't listen to Mr. Omelette. He doesn't know what he's talking about.

I've heard of it. I've heard of it. I'm Mr. Omelette, and I'm here to have a little.

Oh, his brains are eggs. Oh, good.

Edil, I completely agree.

I just think we as a collective have to come together and tear these motherfuckers apart, limb by limb, because there's no other way. The only way out is through. Just like we saw with our friend Mr. Omelette.

I'm not really an eye-for-an-eye person. I don't quite believe in that. But sometimes to fall asleep, the way I soothe myself, is what if we just all put them in a room and we lock the door? And then their punishment is just the cruel and unusual punishment is each other. And I'm not specifying who we're talking about. I'm just saying, what if we put them all in one big room?

Yes.

What if it's a small room? Let's call it the trunk of a car. And then we drive the car off a, let's call it a cliff. And we're not saying who. And we're not even saying who. And it doesn't even have to be people. It could just be in the trunk of the car. It could just be cartoons.

It could be the concept of, you know, anything.

We could be talking about anyone or anything. Adal, yeah, I'm with you. I got you. Whatever you're doing, you got my full support, pal.

Perfect. Thank you. If that's on the ballot come November, I'll throw in a vote. I'll say, hey, why not?

JPC, I just realized, was it hurtful to watch me sort of come down on you about the omelette stuff and then give Adal my full, undying support when he proposed violence? Like, is that hard?

No, I disagree with my omelettes and I agree with Adal's thing. So it's all, hey, come November, if I could vote for me not getting omelettes anymore, I'll vote for that as well. What does it hurt, you know? What does it hurt to throw a couple of yeses on the ballot and issue that some JPC can't-be-served omelettes to county-wide ordinance? What does that hurt? It hurts nobody.

Erin, it begs the question, how are you doing?

I'm okay. I'm somewhere between omelette hell and wanting to actively do something because I can't stand it anymore. Um, so yeah, I'm somewhere on that range.

Okay, sure.

In a healthy place, I think. Everything's okay. Rewatching Derry Girls, that'll help. That helps.

Derry Girls is the Irish show? Okay, yes. I feel like I've seen, I've walked past an episode or two.

I think you would really enjoy it. I, here's, Adal, have you watched it?

I feel like I've seen maybe a scene or something from it. I remember it being funny, but I just haven't sat down and watched the whole thing. Is it worth a full watch?

I think it really is. And I think I had to, I don't know why, but during the pandemic when it came out, I had to start it like four times. I think the pilot, something about the tone of it, it felt didn't It didn't quite feel like enough of like a capital C comedy for me when I first started it. And now I genuinely think it is up there with the rest of development in terms of strongest ensemble comedy cast.

Wow.

It's like that deep of a bench of that many funny people in a show. It's crazy. And it's also like, you can really get through it in a week. There's not that many episodes. It is laugh out loud funny and it's gentle soap too. It's not going to feel like too stressful of a watch right now.

Speaking of gentle soap, Erin, maybe we could get into some riddles that are like, you know, cleansing and pleasant.

Non-abrasive.

Like one of those like those dial soaps that foam when you press it down. I love that. Oh, I love a little foam.

He tricked me into doing riddles. So riddles I shall do. Here are some riddles submitted by Daisy. Thank you, Daisy. Daisy made some before and after riddles, the kind where there's two overlapping phrases. Uh, and then she says, thanks for always being my favorite podcast and keeping me so much company. I work mostly solo as a visual artist.

Yes, suck it, the Joe Rogan experience.

So your podcast really means the world to me. Uh, thank you, Daisy. Here are Daisy's riddles. And I think you'll be, these are self-explanatory. I don't think I need to burn one as an example.

Okay.

A street in New York City where you can see a play or get some pretty affordable furniture.

Broadway fare.

Yes. A magical school and the way they accept you just as you are.

Hogwarts and all.

Yes.

Hogwarts and all.

A famous Neil Young song about a classic lunch choice.

I'm out. Heart of gold lunchables. Wait, what was it? A classic what choice?

A famous Neil Young song.

Okay.

About a classic lunch choice.

Is it heart of gold?

No.

I don't know the catalog of Neil Young. I had to look this up. It's always fascinating to me when someone's like, Neil Young is just like a blind spot for me when someone's like, oh yeah, Neil Young. I'm like, I don't know, man.

Keep on rocking in the free world market groceries.

It's about a woman.

It's a classic lunch choice. Is it sandwich?

Yes.

Okay. So is it sand? Something sand?

Yes.

Castle in the sand?

So yeah, if that doesn't ring a bell, then I think you're like me and you weren't familiar with the song, Cowgirl in the Sand. Now I'd like to see a scene.

You want to see a scene where someone's doing cowgirl in the sand?

Yeah, I want to see a scene. You are two songwriters, and Neil Young has just told you that in the next 20 minutes, he needs a song called Cowgirl in the Sand. And you guys are just trying to figure out what that means and what these lyrics could possibly be about.

Okay, okay, okay. We've done it before. We can do it again. We can do it again. Sherry Baby, we knocked out in three minutes, remember?

Yeah. You're sure he said cowgirl in the sand? That's the words that he said to you in the hallway?

Honestly, you could never tell. He has that Canadian sort of twang. Twang, twang. You know, cowgirls have a twang.

Yeah. If that's what we're talking about. with cowgirl in the sand, right? Is he talking about a girl who is like a girl cowboy?

I think so.

Are you sure he's not talking about the sexual position?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, fuck. It's probably about fucking on the beach.

But is it? Because it's Neil Young. Like, has he done other... Has he had us write other songs about, like, fucking in that same way? Oh, maybe it's about a cowgirl. What would she be doing on the beach?

Oh, she's trying to lasso the ocean. That's fun. That's romantic.

Why don't we just think of words and stuff like that, lasso the ocean, that could be both sex and cowboy. Yes, euphemisms. Yes, exactly.

Just to get into the spirit, let's do it in Neil's voice.

I need to lasso the ocean.

And just because I can't do Neil, I'm gonna do Bob. Shooing the horse!

And sorry, that was Bob who?

That is my neighbor Bob, who does a bad Bob Dylan impression.

Oh, here he comes, here he comes, here he comes. Neil! Buddy!

Hey, um, guys, you kept the, uh, you were leaning on the microphone in the booth thing. We all heard everything.

Whoopsie doopsie. You did say cowgirl in the sand, right?

Yeah.

Okay. You ready? You ready to hear this?

Yeah, I guess um you guys aren't if you don't want to be here you can go. I just I feel like okay.

I'm really making We'll see you tomorrow. Full pay! Full pay! Full pay!

Wow, you took me up on that fast. Holy fuck. A warm boozy drink for when the Amish get to go on vacation.

Spiced rum Springer.

Yeah.

Um, close. You got that second half.

It's another boozy- Buttered Rum Springer?

Yeah, Hot Buttered Rum Springer.

Hot Buttered Rum Springer.

Adam and Eve's favorite fast casual dining establishment.

Uh, Applebee's?

No, but that works great.

Oh, so it's- The Garden of Edenes?

Oh my god, that's so much, that is, these are, I'm like freaking out, you guys are giving such good answers. You have, um, Garden of Eden is correct.

And it's not Garden of Edenies?

No, I wish, I wish.

I took a bite of the apple and now I feel shame and feel awful house?

I just I wish I think that this skill is what's going to be the thing that saves the world. And they can't prove it yet. But I just I know.

Garden of Eden is right.

That's correct. Yes. No, it comes before. Garden of Eden. Yes, I would like to see a scene.

Can I say, can I just say Garden of Eden good in the neighborhood and we're back to Applebee's?

Yes. We always got to get back to Applebee's. Okay, I'd like to see a scene. Yeah. Adal and JPC, you guys are Adam and Eve, and Adam has taken Eve out to Olive Garden for their anniversary and Eve's like, this seems like a lazy choice and that you forgot.

Gotcha.

I'll be back right back with the Dream Quarter.

This is, um, this is nice. This isn't, this is interesting.

This isn't, yeah. Isn't this wild? I found it. I was, um, I followed a, what did God call it? A rabbit? I followed a rabbit and it led me to this and I went in the, I walked in the door and I was like, whoa. And I was like, I got to make reservations.

Oh, you, oh, you've, you've never, you've never been here or heard of here before.

Well, I mean, I just told you I followed a rabbit in here. Got it.

Yeah, so you just followed a rabbit. This is a chain. This is a chain restaurant.

That can't be right.

No, they have these- We're the only two people on Earth. Well, we were.

I mean, I guess there's- The waiter. We just met the waiter. Oh, I heard God told me- I know sometimes God doesn't tell you everything, so I just want to- He still talks to you. Yeah, we're still- He still talks to me. He told me that he took a rib out of chilies and made it chilies too. So that'll be an option if we want that.

Hey, um, you're not with your, you're not with your boys. And by boys, I mean like that bear and, uh... Oh, is Roscoe here? Is Roscoe here? I'm just saying that this is a date and I want you to kind of treat it like a date. And I don't want to hear like your little jokes that you do with like your boys or whatever.

Here is your Aperol Spritz. And we were out of Chardonnay, so we just call this the white wine. Um, can I get an order of soup, salad, and breadsticks in for you?

I'm so sorry, can I ask who you were made from?

Oh, um... My parents' names are Daryl and Karen.

He's here on a date. I'm not sure why he needs to know who your parents are. Daryl and Karen? You're on a date, Adam, okay? Sorry, I'm so sorry.

Yes, can we do a... Oh my god, are you guys... Oh my god, it's you.

Do you want a picture?

Um, no, I just would love, I would love, no, you know, it doesn't matter. I'm gonna, I don't want to get in trouble with my manager, but, um.

No, please, you know, it's, trouble follows us, like, well, if it's something we can do, we're happy to do it.

Um, I just wanted to, like, ask, like, why you ate that apple.

Motherfucker. Okay, yeah, soup and salad and breadsticks. Thank you.

Okay, all right, yeah. Thank you. Sure.

Un-fucking-believable. Eve, what was that?

You gotta get over it.

It's like, it's like meeting, it's like meeting, like, Reagan and being like, what was it like to get shot?

Come on, that's totally different. He's, he deserved it.

I know. Oh, oh, is that what you're saying? No, you're saying I didn't deserve it. Well, thank you.

No, you didn't. But I'm saying I'm glad you gave us clothes and that's fun because it's a way to like express our personalities. So it's I don't think anyone's mad at you.

What was that that you just did when you said express our personalities? You hate this. You hate what I'm wearing. You think it's too many leaves.

Oh, you would love me.

You would love me to be wearing three leaves like one of your whores.

Sorry to interrupt, but the snake over there, the gentleman over at the bar has sent over a apple martini for you. On the house, so.

Sorry, for which of us?

Oh, he just pointed just in this general direction, so I'm not 100% sure. I'm sure you can share it. Um, I will be right back with it.

No, send it back. If that snake wants to fuck us, he's gonna have to buy two drinks.

Whoa, this is like a 15-shell martini. I don't have shells to be wasting. No, I'll drink it. I'll drink it.

Oh, so taking me out to dinner is wasting shells?

I didn't say that. I'm just saying you can't look a gift... Snake. ...eventual animal in the mouth. Yeah, a gift snake. Thank you.

Uh, Eve, I thought you liked apples. Your reputation.

Just the soup, salad, and breadsticks, please. Sure. Just the soup, salad, and breadsticks, please. I'm done with her. I'm done with her. That's a woman who hates women.

No horses, but we have Reagan.

A line from an Eminem song that became a meme, which while American in theme was primarily produced in Italy during the 1960s and 70s. I love this one.

Is it mom's spaghetti twice? Is it spaghetti twice?

I'm

Yeah, we have, we just, we have a noodle type here that we call spaghetti and it is Italian. I'm sure that there are noodles that were like invented here in America that they do not have.

What's the fucking fettuccine alfredo, I believe is an American invention.

Yeah, but they had fettuccine, right? Yeah, but we made it bad. But we covered it in cream.

We made it impossible to digest.

Isn't it true that tomatoes got introduced to Italy after the quote-unquote discovery of the New World? Tomatoes were from the Americas and they went back to Italy? I can't remember. Tomatoes were not native to Italy. So 500 years ago, I don't think tomato sauces were in Italy at all. But I think of tomato sauces being pivotal to Italian food.

Oh yeah. I mean, they call their sauce gravy, but we all know it's tomato. Crushed tomato.

Part of me would love to eat food from like 500 years ago. I bet it was bad. I bet it was pretty bad.

Yeah, you're not, it's also going to probably make you sick. Although some of it's probably pretty good.

But I think like, especially for our modern palates, like salt was like a rarity. I think food was pretty just like, hey, here's the food. I wonder, I would love to see like, or like to read something about like what food was like 500 years ago.

I remember reading a lot of, when I was reading a lot of like George R.R. Martin, stuff like that, I remember being like, oh man, I've never had mead. And they always make mead sound so good.

Yeah.

Gulping down mead. And then I tried mead and I was like, oh no, this is rough.

The funny thing about mead is you're like, whoa, yeah, like mead, but then you don't see it anywhere. You're like, oh no, like beer won out big time. Like the reason why you don't have mead anymore is because beer is way better.

I think that like the food wasn't like genetically modified. You know how like we fixed bananas to make them look pretty?

Yeah, like the Cavendish banana and all that stuff.

Yeah, but I bet there's like more nutrients in the vegetables and fruits that they had then and less chemicals.

Yeah, but they also didn't have, they didn't have what, like the biodiversity that we have now? Because there was no like, things couldn't cross like great distances. So it's like, you know, whatever that was growing over here, like never made it to Italy. It's like the tomato never made it there. So it's, yeah, it's interesting. I don't know.

I think like... Well, they stayed alive. Enough of them were able to stay alive with what they were eating.

It's wild to think about pilgrims eating cotton candy grapes.

Yeah. It's like showing a person from the past, like a TV show, giving them one cotton candy grape. They'd be like, what the fuck?

Okay, I do want to see a scene. JPC, you are someone in the current era. Erin, you are a time traveler who somehow made it to our current time, and JPC is showing you a TV show.

What has happened to me? I was in the field and I was tending to my crops and I beamed here.

Yeah, yeah.

No, I wouldn't know that word. I'm suddenly in a different place. What witchcraft is this?

Hey, calm down, calm down. No, no, no. Your wife's not a witch. Your wife's not a witch. This happens all the time. I think a time traveler left a machine in that field. I get people like you in here all the time. You are from a different time and you have traveled through time into my time. Sit down on the couch. This is a couch. It's awesome. I'm watching TV. I'll kind of catch you up as to... As to what's happening.

What?

So this is like Sherlock, but he's like a kid. But not like a kid kid. Like he's like 19. He's like Sherlock, but he's like 19. But it's all like the same.

Are you God?

Here's the thing though. He's friends with Moriarty in this one.

Because their whole thing obviously is like... I don't have the context for this.

I'm explaining the context. He's friends with Moriarty in this.

Don't get mad at me. I time traveled. If you came back to me, I would be nice. I'd let you call my wife a witch.

It's basically, so it's the guy that did Snatch. You probably haven't seen Snatch. Have you seen Lockstock?

No.

Okay. Well, I don't know his other movies.

But like a British, it's a British or Irish.

So I think Moriarty is Scottish, but like Sherlock, I think is like England. It's, you know, and honestly, I'm not even too good with the accents anyway, so I don't really know. I just know that it's like it does sound a little different, but they're kids, but not kids. Anyway, Guy Ritchie.

Okay, amazing.

Produced it. I don't think you directed it.

I'm going to write this down.

Maybe a couple episodes. Maybe the pilot. This isn't the pilot. This is episode four.

The Coney Doyles are going to be rich. Talk slower. Talk slower. I'm writing this down.

Honestly, I've been kind of on my Steam Deck while I'm watching it, so I'm not exactly 100% sure what's going on in the show. What's going on in the show? Oh, and then also Colin Firth was in it.

Colin Firth.

Twist!

Ah!

You've returned! Ah, yes. You were zapped away. Where did you go? What did you learn?

We're gonna be rich, motherfuckers.

Motherfuckers?

You're a witch and I'm Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

Arthur Conan Doyle?

See? That's who wrote Sherlock Holmes, right?

Yeah. Arthur Conan Doyle. I have to say every word as if it's a word I've never heard before. Oh, I love that.

We're going to do one more of Daisy's Riddles and then we're going to move on.

What TV show would you show someone from the past to like comfort them or get them up to speed?

Introduce them to the concept of TV.

Yes, I think for me, I think Double Dare because you don't- Adal!

Adal! Hold on. Adal! Adal!

Let me plead my case.

Adal.

Let me plead my case.

I cannot think of a worse one. I actually, if you'd given me six days to come up with a worse one.

What is Gak? If you show someone Frasier or, you know, Seinfeld or something, they're gonna be so confused. If you show them a family of four sliding through a mouth filled with banana cream pudding looking for a flag, that's not only universal, it's how How do you say universal but for time? It's time-a-versal. Time-a-versal. Anyone in the history of time understands a family having fun in a messy situation.

You know what? Here's what I'd do. This is a genius idea. This is a million-dollar idea. Someone comes from the past. You show them a period piece from where they're from. Yeah. Because then, they'll be like, oh, it looks similar enough that I'm getting... And then you move on to be like, and next, Frasier. We gotta watch Frasier. It's so funny. But first you watch Bridgerton or whatever to let them know, yeah, this is kind of what it was like.

I'm curious if the whole time they'd be like,

Actually, you show them Downton Abbey and you're like and they're like oh great this and then you show them like some like um alternate reality like Man in the High Castle or like uh Handmaid's Tale and be like this is what the world is and then they get all freaked out and then you take them to Applebee's you're like nah bitch just kidding this is it it's just it's it's regular you could just get steak fries or whatever

I think I'm showing them, hmm, cocoa melon.

Wow. Yeah. Disgusting.

Yeah, something just really brain melty.

I'm showing them Bluey, and then the second they meet an Australian person, they're like, oh my God, I thought y'all were dogs. I thought y'all were only dogs.

Here's Daisy's last riddle. A way to confuse others while pleasuring yourself.

Wait, why did I think that they were all... This one's a little bit... Perky jerky-ing off.

Okay, uh, no, but that is now a part of my vocabulary forever.

A way to confuse others. Mr. Erection? Mr. Erection? Mr. Erection?

No.

What are we doing? What's the game?

There's no game. Go home, man, there is no game.

What do I win, Alex?

Honey, honey, close the blinds. Mr. Erection is coming through the door.

I'd like to solve the puzzle, Drew. What do I win? That's so funny.

A way to confuse others? A trick?

Yes. A way to confuse others while pleasuring oneself. But I would switch those and the order is different.

So pleasuring oneself is what we get first. Master bait.

Master bait and switching?

Yes, master bait and switch.

Master bait and switch.

I'm going, I would like to see a scene.

That's my Netflix and chill. Do you guys have a switch?

Master bait and switch too. I'm going to leave it to you guys what we see.

What is that?

This is the first time ever that I'm just going to say I want to see a scene and you guys get to decide what the masturbate and switch scene is about.

Okay, Erin, can you give us a second? Hey JPC, like Admiral Ackbar once screamed, it's a trap. This is a trap. She's trying to get us to be like, oh, let's do a nasty, raunchy little scene.

Yeah, so we're going to do it, but we're not going to do what she wants us to do, which is a nasty, raunchy, we're going to do a scene. Are you guys ready for the scene? Hold on, Erin. about Masturbate and Switch, but it's not going to be like sexual at all. Yeah. Ready? Yeah. I got it. Okay. So you sure in the hallway he said he wanted a song called Masturbate and Switch?

I think that's what he said. It's hard to tell because he's got that, you know, Canadian twang.

Hey, speaking of Canadian twang, did you know that all Australian people aren't cartoon dogs? What? Yeah. They can't be right. I just met one. And it was, he looked, he looked normal. I mean, he still talked like a cartoon dog and everything. Heather. Heather.

Heather, come hither. Are you saying Heather or hither?

We zoom out and they're both masturbating.

Check out Masturbate and Switch on Neil Young's Harvest.

Showing somebody from the past to masturbate and switch and they're like, I get it. It's universal. I get it. It appeals to me.

Okay, should we go on a break? Should we take a break? That took a lot out of me.

I'm being honest. There's a big puddle on the floor and I'm seeing, I think most of that used to be in me and now it's on the floor.

Ross and Rachel were on a break?

You got it. Now back to the past. Hey guys, I'm playing hide and seek with Adaline JPC. And so I'm hiding, so just bear with me. Do you know that Mother's Day is coming up? And let me guess, you're going to go for the same old, same old. You're going to get your wife or your mom flowers, brunch, a gift card, fluffy robe that you already got her last year. What if you got her an Aura frame? If your mom is anything like my mom, she will send you screenshots of photos from six years ago in the middle of the day on a Tuesday. Because moms love looking at photos. That's like their number one thing that they love to do. The Aura frame has free unlimited storage. You can add as many photos or videos as you want. You can even preload photos before it ships, maybe adding inside jokes, all the photos that she's been screenshotting, and then she'll send you a screenshot of a screenshot of a screenshot of a photo, and you can include those on there. You can personalize your gift. There can be messages that you can have a gift box. Every frame comes packaged in a premium gift box with no price tag. Just download the free Aura app and text photos straight to the frame. The AuraFrame reached number one in the App Store on Christmas Day in 2025 because moms love the AuraFrame. Named number one on Wirecutter, you can save on the gifts moms love by visiting AuraFrames.com. For a limited time, listeners can get $25 off their best-selling Carver mat frame with code RIDDLE. That's Aura, A-U-R-A, frames.com, promo code RIDDLE, R-I-D-D-L-E. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Oh my gosh, I forgot to whisper. Do you think they're looking for me? It's been like six and a half days, but I bet they're really excited to find me. 999, 1000. Ready or not, here I come. Oh, hey everybody. I'm just playing a quick game of hide and seek with Adal and JPC, so you keep an eye out for them while I talk to you about quints. This past weekend, I was out and about with my new Italian suede slouchy midnight blue bag. And I kid you not, several of the most beautiful, cool-looking women asked me where I got it. And I got to go, Quince, it's super affordable. I want my everyday items to be classic and timeless and comfortable and easy and affordable. And that's why I shop at Quince. Quince has all the wardrobe staples for spring. Think 100% European linen shorts and shirts from $34. Lightweight, breathable, and comfortable. But we're still going to look put together. And clean! 100% prima cotton tees with a softness that has to be felt. Everything is priced 50-80% less than what you'll find at similar brands. Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen, so you're getting premium materials without the markup. I love everything I have from Quince. I recently got sandals from them. I'm obsessed with their home stuff. If you're looking for basics like rugs or curtains, truly just the most timeless, classic, well-made items are over there at Quince. So check it out. Still not seeing Adler GPC. Starting to worry that they went to the movies or something. No, they're around. I'll find them. Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to quince.com slash riddle for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash riddle, R-I-D-D-L-E, for free shipping and 365-day returns. That's a full year. If it's a full year, you can decide if you like it. You're going to like it. quince.com slash riddle. I found you! Oh, no. Sorry, false alarm. Those are just two scarecrows eating dessert waffles. Onward and upward! Hello, everybody. It's me, Erin Keif, here to talk about my dog, Lou. I bet you've heard me talk about Lou hundreds, if not thousands of times on the show because I am obsessed with her. Fun fact about Lou, this past weekend in Palm Springs, she ran face first into a cactus and I did not handle it well. And if anyone gets being dog obsessed, it's Ollie. I love Ollie's dog food. They're relentless about delivering the best food and experience to your dog. And they give you a way to check in on their health over and over and over again. All these fresh recipes are developed by real chefs and backed by vet nutritionists. They're obsessed with making the best meals and the highest quality ingredients. From the moment you start your subscription, everything is tailored to your dog. The meals are perfectly portioned and you get a pup-tainer, cute, and a scoop for easy storing and serving. With Ollie, you don't just get food. Through their app, you can actually check on your dog's health with real vets. Just by uploading a picture, their team can check in on your dog's weight, digestion, teeth, and coat. Because they're obsessed with making sure your pup is as healthy as can be. Lou's getting old, and I just want her to be healthy and have the best life she can. Since switching to Ollie, Lou gets even more excited to eat. She clearly loves the food. And also, I just noticed she's got a little bit more energy. She's acting like a puppy again, and she's running into cactuses. Cacti? And she's running into cacti full speed in the middle of the desert. Well, get ready for both you and your pup to be obsessed. Head to ollie.com slash riddle. Tell them all about your dog and use code RIDDLE to get 70% off your welcome kit when you subscribe today. Plus, they offer an obsession guarantee. If you're not completely obsessed, you'll get your money back. That's ollie, O-L-L-I-E dot com slash riddle. And enter code RIDDLE, R-I-D-D-L-E, to get 70% off your first box. Isn't that right, Lou? I thought she would bark on cue. That would have been so awesome if she had barked. She didn't though. You didn't though, Lou.

Okay, Adal, Erin, I've seen the movie, I've read the book, I'm all about Project Hail Mary nowadays, and I don't want to brag, but I have actually built something that is pretty cool and kind of relates to a sponsor of the show, if you know where I'm going. Oh, who's my little rock friend here? So, this is Adal, this is Rockette, Rockette Money, this is Rockette Money.

Oh, like the app that I love. RocketMoney is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

Don't worry about it, buddy. Look, all you need to know is that you didn't get your name from the app, you're your own guy, I love you, I found you in space, and Rocket Money has automatic transaction categorization across accounts, plus customizable categories and tags to reveal spending patterns. You can save for like a big event, like it helped me save for my wedding celebration, or you can use it to set budgets and goals, which is something that I love setting, and I use it daily, weekly, monthly for that as well.

It has canceled so many unwanted subscriptions. It has saved users over 880 million in canceled subscriptions. I know we're always signing up for free trials for things and forgetting it, and they're hoping that you're not going to notice, but you know who notices? Rocket Money. And they go, not on our watch.

Yeah, Rocket Money is like a good wingman at a bar who's like, whoa, you're not buying two old fashions, you're buying one.

Hey Erin, that's just a rock with eyes drawn on, right? Yeah, I see the same thing you see. Plus, you can set automated savings goals in Rocket Money so you can grow towards goals with adjustable amounts and frequencies. You can set it and forget it with Rocket Money.

Whoa, guys, look, that rock is starting to float in the air. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at rocketmoney.com slash riddle. That's rocketmoney.com slash riddle. rocketmoney.com slash riddle.

It's real.

I love you, daddy. Oh, TPC.

Guys, I was doing that. I was doing that with my mouth. I'm holding it.

Oh, yeah, there's a hand on the rock. Welp. Welp. Welp.

Okay, guys, for the second half of the episode, I want to do like a little word game that I kind of invented. Fun. Okay, I'm intrigued. And basically, the way that this game works is you take a person that we know's nickname, not their given name, but their nickname, and then you combine it with like another... PerfeJPC. No, no, no. It's not one of us. It's a person that we know. Oh, okay. You combine it with another like first name, like first name proper. So, for instance, if I said, Santhony, What would you guys think where, you know, where you work backwards from Santhony?

I mean, we work with Anthony Burt, but we also work with... Oh, Santhony Sleepo.

Sleepo Tony? Sleepo Tony.

Yeah, Adal got it. Casey, you are our guest on today.

Wait a second. Wait a second.

Wait a second. Wait a second. Santhony Weiss himself is here. That is, of course, our friend Sandy.

Sandy, welcome to the show. If my name is Santhony in full form, then my nickname would be Stoney. Hey, Stoney's a pretty cool nickname. Ooh, Casey Stoney. Come on down, Casey Stoney. Stoney, another thing you might find at the beach, like Sandy.

Having to make up games on the spot.

That's my whole life. Not have to, want to. You can find Sandy on the beach, Stoney, Sharky. Are compelled to. Can't not do.

Sharky and Stoney feel like names of your grandpa's friends. They don't feel like common nowadays nicknames.

What? Stoney does? Sharky and Stoney. Yeah, they sound like characters from a Richard Linklater film. My wife talks about her ancestors and their brothers who were all, had Yiddish nicknames like Shmulky. Shmulky? Is that like the Yiddish version of Smokey? It probably is, yeah. And they were all gamblers. Shmulky?

Isn't Shmulky your middle name, Adal?

Adal Shmulky Rifai.

That's what happens because Adal married a Jewish woman so he had to take a Jewish middle name.

That is law. Also, Schmokey is the lead character in Jewish Friday. Oy vey, you got knocked the fuck out. I was about to make a joke about Friday translated into Yiddish, but I don't know what it is. I've never heard it. I don't think we've ever talked about it in my life. Frigga. Frigga. Frigga. Maybe they don't talk about Friday. Oh, Shabbat would be Saturday, I suppose. But, uh, Freitag is Friday. Freitag in Yiddish. Yeah. That's the movie. That's the movie version of what Adal was talking about.

I love to learn. I love to learn.

Uh, what did Sandy get Friday on Letterboxd? Let's see. Let's get an update on that.

A callback to a month ago or whatever.

That movie from also like, what, 30 years ago? Hey, phenomenal movie. Yeah.

They made a sequel, didn't they? Oh yeah. Next Friday. They did not call it Saturday. I think it was Friday, next Friday, and then the third one... Friday after next? Friday after next, maybe?

Or, no, Friday, another Friday, next Friday, and then the Friday after next. Wasn't there four?

I'm

Kind of bring it back to puzzles and riddles and whatnot. So I got to ask, what have you brought us today?

Oh, good of you to ask. I have brought a reprise of a game I ran about a year ago that unfortunately has to do with sports, but I made so many of them that I thought I would bring them back and see if you guys can get the rest.

This is going to feel like a victory lap where I fell the first time and now I'm going to perhaps fall again.

We'll see you next time. The good news is you have to know nothing about sports itself. You just have to know the names of professional sports teams. Got it. The way this works is I'm going to give you a clue about how two teams might compete in another activity based on their names. And you have to tell me what names I'm talking about. These are team names in professional sports leagues in North America. That's the bounds in which this game works. So, for example, if I said what two professional sports teams might compete in Pokemon, or American politics would be an alternate way to phrase it, you would say the Cincinnati Reds and the St. Louis Blues. Reds and Blues are a Pokemon game. Previous ones we did were, like, casting spells, the wizard and the magic, being in a jacuzzi, the jets and the heat, etc. Okay.

Got it. Got it. Yes.

All right. Which two teams might compete in a competition about car repair? Car repair, okay.

Is there a team that's called the Jacks? That seems like it could be a team, right, Adal? There's a lot of athletes called Jacks.

There's Mike and the Mechanics, but that's a band.

Car repair.

Well, the Oilers, the Edmonton Oilers. Wow. That's not even one I considered, but, well, wait. Oh, right, because I was thinking the Oilers were defunct, but that's... They are. That's the NFL team, the Oilers, but the Edmonton Oilers are defunct too? Wait. There's two... We'll see you next time. Oh, how kind of you. So we didn't get it.

No, you didn't get it. Car repair. What do we know about cars? Engines, carburetors, tires.

Oh, the Detroit Pistons. Pistons. Pistons is one. And this is the same sport, but not the same league. So basketball.

So what is an Astro? Huh? No. The Mufflers

That's a pun.

Adal, that's so funny. It's so... If they did it, it's so disrespectful. It's so funny. The pistons and the mufflers. Ladies and gentlemen, your Detroit catalytic converter.

Oh wait, I'm so wrong about this. It's not Detroit. So I got oilers and pistons, but those aren't the two car-related teams.

Since you lied to us, can you tell us what city it is?

Yeah, I did lie. However, technically, the Detroit Metro Air is getting a women's national basketball team in 2029. They're going to be called the Shock, which would also apply. This is the Sparks, the Los Angeles Sparks, the city that you live in, Erin.

Oops.

Because of Sparkplug. Which two teams would be good in a competition about fabricating-slash-making-things-up? Now, I'm going to tell you something to remind you that there are a lot of homophones at play here. So, including in this answer set, you're going to think very homophonically. Oh, the Lions. Yeah!

The Detroit Lions. The Salt Lake City Cashmeres. What? I make sense. I make sense.

It's real. Here's the thing. If they do make a WNBA team in Salt Lake City, Salt Lake City is Utah Jazz. And who goes to a jazz club but somebody in cashmere?

Yeah. That's right. Erin, you nailed it.

Yeah, but explain to me how the cashmere connects to the making stuff up part.

Now that's your job.

Erin just made it up. That's your job. Oh, okay. Catching is not a real thing.

There we go. Okay, so making stuff up, we have Lions for Detroit Lions.

Dreamers. Chicago Bulls shits. The Chicago Bulls. You've heard of them. Wow.

That fucking rules. Good one, Adal. Thank you. Not you, Sam. Your thing was fine, but Adal's answers were great. Thank you. As we've established, Sandy does not think of all the answers. Adal's thinking of way more answers so far than Sandy has thought of.

What about two teams that would be good at DJing? DJing a party.

Jazz.

The jazz, yeah. Nice one. Stay in that same part of the country.

Oh, Seattle Super Musics.

Nevada.

The Sonics, I mean.

Yeah, SuperSonics.

Turntables.

The Jazz and the, hmm.

Oh, Houston. Houston, rock it. Yeah. Oh, that's better than what I had. I had Rockies. You should have a fire. Oh, Rockies, Rockies. What was the one you had, Sandy? The Rockies. I like Rockets better. It's much better. Yeah, Rockies and Rockets. You're right, Adal is coming up with the answers. If I hire a DJ, they better rock it or else they're not getting paid. Right. They'll still get paid, I'm sorry.

No, you better do a perfect set or you don't get paid. That's awesome.

Hey man, I'm looking at the invoice here and you didn't play Herbie Hancock not even once the whole night, so I'm gonna have to dock you, bro.

It's so funny to just dance party and then put on Headhunters and be like, everyone love the dance floor. All right. How about two teams that are competing at traveling on vacation? Traveling on vacation.

Traveling on vacation. I don't think it's going to be basketball because traveling is really bad in basketball.

So I think that they would avoid that. I'll say one is football and one is hockey.

Oh the Boston, oh great Gary, our vacation is Bruins.

Give it to him. Give it to him.

Please, Mr. Please. I just... Dogs have the Walla Walla Griswolds. Wait, what was this? Oh, vacation. Vacation. They go to Walla Walla Washington. Wait, one of the teams is the Walla Walla Griswolds? No, I'm making a joke about the movie Vacation, where they go to Walla Walla. The Walla Walla baseball team is actually called the Sweets. How about that? Oh my god, and their logo looks like a massive garlic bulb. I will say minor league baseball teams have the best mascots. It's unbelievable how good they are. There's a Montgomery Biscuits, like, come on.

Are any of these minor league teams or are these major? No, no, these aren't one team. And have we gotten either? Hockey. I just don't know hockey teams so well. What are some hockey teams?

The Mighty Ducks, the Blackhawks, the Bruins. The Bruins. One of them is quite very clearly related to traveling. The Capitals.

The trains. Airplanes. Cars.

Airplanes is close.

Wings.

You could say the jets, but it's not what I'm after here. It is the flyers. Oh, frequent flyers. And then what else do you do before you leave for the airport? The Packers.

Packers.

Packers and flyers. God damn it. Those are good ones, Sandy. How about, oh thank you, how about competing in haircutting? Clippers. Great one, Japes.

And I quit. And I retire.

The impulse cut your bang theme.

The New Orleans fades. The Nets. That's a hairstyle. The Hornets beehive.

Adal, if I had your brain, I would be happy every day. I would be happy every day.

Ignorance is bliss. Okay, the Clippers, so one of them was basketball. Did you say what the other one is?

The other one is, I should have said, it's soccer. So you're not... Soccer. So good luck. Oh, is this like internet? No, you said North America. Yeah, MLS. MLS soccer. Okay, so we all know it's out of... Oh, I have another joke answer.

Can I do a joke answer?

Joe Cancer. Who's Joe Cancer?

Hey, it's me, Joe Cancer. I'm an old comedy club little road dog.

They call Joe Camel Joe Cancer. They found two lumps.

My Joe Cancer was the Seattle faux hawks.

That's good. That's fantastic. Thank you. Thank you. It is a word related to a certain kind of hairstyle, for sure. I truly, for a sucker. Is that a Columbus? Ohio. Oh boy. And it is alliterative, sort of, it starts with a C. Columbus.

Oh, I have, for some reason I have no clue.

You can also put crew. Cincinnati. Crew? It is the crew.

The crew.

Crew cut.

I have so many friends from Columbus that have crew jerseys and it's like something I've been like vaguely aware of for so long and I couldn't have named it.

Do you think the crew is a reference to just like a team of people or is it like a rowing reference or? It's Cincinnati. It's Columbus. Is Columbus landlocked? Where's Columbus? Columbus is in the middle of a state. Yeah, it's not rowing. I guess it's just, hey, we're a group. We're a bunch of friends. We're the crew. Yeah. Their minor league baseball team, I don't know if it still is, used to be the Columbus Clippers, and their mascot was a big sailboat. So I don't know if there's something nautical going on in Columbus that we don't know about.

That's so funny if that's what it is, though, if crew just means group. It's like, we're the team.

Do I dare suggest that... It's a reference to Christopher Columbus, who did a lot of sailing. Okay.

Oh, maybe.

He had a clipper, he had a crew. I guess so, yeah, maybe. I don't know, it's named after him.

Someone should tell us.

Bad luck for you. Bad luck for you, Columbus. I don't know if I want to know. I think I'm okay not knowing this one. That's one of those things, I'm okay not knowing. Don't tell me if you know it. All right, how about Thievery, competing in Thievery. Again, we're talking about this.

Steelers.

Pittsburgh Steelers. Steelers is correct.

Can I ask you guys as a brief break something that you're okay not knowing? I think about this all the time and I never look it up. When you're driving on the highway, sometimes you will see a thing that's called a crash investigation site and it'll just be like a place off to the side of the highway. I don't know what the fuck that's about.

They are studying the Dave Matthews album.

Take care everyone. Bye bye.

Turn off the lights. Shut down the podcast.

Okay, so Steelers we got.

So thievery, we had Steelers and is there like a Barons?

Oh, that's good.

Minor league team or something? Nope, it is basketball. Basketball? Basketball. It's not a word that you use very often to describe stealing, but it does mean that phonetically. Pilfer.

What about the Ravens? Don't Ravens steal? They love treasures.

They love shiny treasures. Magpies.

It's a basketball team and it involves stealing.

And they're not called the Fingersmiths, which is too bad because that is a radical name for a... The Fingersmiths, Jesus Christ. Trailblazers, Lakers, the Lifters, the Oilers, the Lakers. It's a word that Maverick, in that Mel Gibson movie, Maverick took everyone's money. I mean Maverick, Top Gun Maverick, took everyone's money at the box office. Kaboom. Thank you. I don't know, I wouldn't call it stealing. Stole my heart, those bedroom eyes.

What about, this is football I think, but the Vikings, right? Oh yeah. They were renowned for their pillaging.

It's true. The Pillage People. It is a short one-syllable word that means to steal. Like to steal something small and very quickly. Nick. To Nick. You've got it.

Good one, Jakes. Oh, that's so smart.

The Knicks. Short for Knickerbockers. The Knicks is short for Knickerbocker. But they're just called the Knicks, right? They're not called the Knickerbockers.

I mean, I think, like, on their tax forms, they're probably called the Dick the Bokkers.

No, they have one of those, like, phony pass-through names, like, Very Cool, Very Smart Productions, or whatever, you know, it's like... That's right. Yeah.

Cool guy doing tough productions. Now, they should have been called the Bokkers. That would have been fun. Yeah. Instead of the Knicks, you know, they shortened it the other way.

And it's chickens as the mascots, the Bokkers.

Yeah, they're, Bok, bok, bok, bok! Love.

What is that melody?

Bach, Bach, Bach, Bach.

Hey, I'll tell you what. It could be Bach. Probably isn't. Probably Mozart or something else.

Mozart's best friend.

That's the St. Louis Brahms.

Does anyone know is bum bum bum bum is that Bach? Is that Beethoven?

Does anyone know? It's Beethoven. Okay, good. Oh, you know, there was a crossword theme once in the Times that was really fun. It was like, um, it was, it was that melody. So I think it's like, duh, duh, duh, duh, which is maybe E E E. I shouldn't say it wrong. But let's just say it's E E E B flat. And so, uh, it was like, you wrote an E, and then you wrote an E, and then you wrote an E, and then you wrote B-flat, and then, or it was probably E-flat, and then the crossword included the letters E-F-L-A-T in a different way. So it was one box that contained E-flat. So I was having a hard time figuring it out because I don't know music that well, and my son, who at the time was probably like 11 or 10 or 11, was like, Welcome to

Hey, Sandy, don't worry about it. I said that that was Bach. So it's like, it doesn't matter.

We could say kind of whatever out here. If you're upset with me, make a comment on my letterbox. That's where I take complaints. Under Mr. Hollanzopeth.

Only under that.

I have whole secret conversations with people in the comment section of Mr. Hollanzopeth. No one will ever find it. All right. How about fishing?

Oh, no, thank you. Oh, no, we're doing more. Fishing.

Fishing, okay. Lures, bait, worms, poles. Kings. Kingfisher, obviously. Nets. Oh, the nets. Nets. Nets is right. And the next word is a fishing term, but maybe not one we use as frequently. If you're an angler, you would know this term. Let's see. Rod. I'm an angler. It's hockey. And we've already mentioned it. Bruins.

Ice. Ice fishing. There must be a team called the something ice, right? It's hockey. The Mighty Ducks. Yeah, dude. Okay. Hockey is tough. Fishing. Fishing.

I really don't pay attention to hockey unless it's heated rivalry, in which case I pay a lot of attention.

Is Blackhawk a fishing term?

I'm pretty sure it's not. It is, I'll just tell you, it is the Flyers. The Flyers.

Fly fishing.

Okay, got it, got it, got it. Who said Flyers?

Gotta be Adam. No one.

Erin said it earlier. I said it. Oh, earlier it was an answer to traveling on vacation.

Oh, the Flyers. Oh, I see, I see, I see. So we've already, so we all should have known about it from having had it be a previous episode.

I just don't think of a Flyer as a, but fly fishing I guess. Fly fishing, yeah. Right. How about historical battle reenactments?

Well, I mean, that could be Blackhawks, right? I'm sure that the Blackhawks fought the United States in some way.

Probably the other way around.

Probably replaced the aggressor.

I wouldn't pursue this line of thought too far. Okay, okay, so it's... Battlefield reenactors. Cowboys? Very old, you know, like old, old battles. Redcoats. One is basketball and one is... Welcome back! No, it's not. Oh my gosh, there's a team called the Utah Mammoth. I didn't even know that.

So this is specifically like things that are famous for battlefield recreations, because the only thing I know about battlefield recreations is like the Civil War.

Cannonballs.

It's way older than that. Like old, old battles. Like two kinds of entities you would find in a battle. The Titans!

What would that be? It was like the Titans versus the Gods in the Greek mythology.

I mean, I guess most teams are after warring creatures. Anyway, this one is the hockey team from Las Vegas. Today we're

Uh, yeah, let's do two more and then we'll be out of our fucking misery on these. And Sandy, no more hockey.

I don't want to ever think about hockey again.

He's looking at his list of hockey. It's all hockey.

It's all hockey. Alright, I got two more that are not hockey. Racing Dodge Cars. Racing Dodge Cars? The Rams?

Challengers? No, Rams. Rams. Rams and Chargers?

Rams and Chargers is right. Rams and Chargers! All California. All Southern California. Bull. I would love if the St. Louis Rams were like, oh, this is about computers. Oh shit, yeah. Big laptops on their helmet. Alright, what if I said two at computers, the Rams and the... I don't have an answer, I'm just hoping Adal will come up with something. The buses, the... Jacksonville NVIDIA. The escapes. The escapees. Okay, how about two more. Taming bears. There's three here.

Taming bears. It wouldn't be like cubs or something like that. It's not taming bears.

Cubs wouldn't be bad. These are all the same, work in the same way in relation to bears. They're all kinds of bears. Today we're I love a sun bear.

Oh, yeah.

Sun bear. There's no panda team, unfortunately.

Yet.

Well, maybe there is. Erin's working on it. And finally, I have $20.

It's really hard.

Oh, sorry. Erin wants to eat at Panda Express, is what she said.

Yes. You have to drive me, though. I don't know how to get there.

This one, unfortunately, involves hockey, but I like the pun enough, too much to leave it out. Collecting movies on optical disc. The San Francisco DVDs. Sandy, thank you so much for those. Where can people find you? What do you have going on? What would you like to plug? Well, I'm still making rattle at r-a-d-d-l-e dot quest or rattlerattle.com if that's easier for you to remember. A daily word transformation game that is still going. He says months earlier, hoping I can still make it last. And I run a team building company focused on puzzles and games called The Mystery League. You can find me at mysteryleague.com. And I put on, you know, I make custom puzzles for, like, your off-sites or I'll do it for, like, marketing purposes if you want to hire me for that. I've had several leads come from being on this podcast, so if you're listening to this and you're like, oh, yeah, I want to do something more interesting for my team's off-site, call me. Give me a buzz. Yes.

Find Sandy, hire him for your work. He doesn't use as much filthy profanity as he does on this show. Obviously, he will be, he'll really button it up for a workplace.

And if you call me Stoney in the email, then we're going to give you an immediate discount.

100% discount. 100% discount for Stoney.

All right. Thank you, Sandy. Back in your little sandbox. Okay. Puck off.

Bye, bye, bye, bye. Puck off. Puck off.

All right. Thank you, Sandy. Erin, what are you plugging? What do you want people to know about?

Check out Quality Time. It's a show I host here in Los Angeles. I love it a lot. It's a true variety show and it changes every month. And we have non-traditional acts come in and do stuff. You can follow us on Instagram. Adal, anything to plug or promote?

I want to plug old Nickelodeon game shows. Wild and Crazy Kids, Double Dare, Nick Arcade, Legends of the Hidden Temple. I grew up thinking that a big part of adult life would be shaving balloons. Omar Epps' brother taught me that. I forget his name at the time, but he was the host of Wild and Crazy Kids. I want to say something Epps.

Was it Mike Epps? No, that was a different Epps.

That's a different Epps, right?

Yeah. What was Omar Epps' brother? We'll never know.

Anything to plug or promote?

I'd also like to shout out Penguin Baseball. It is still April of the Penguins on the Hey Riddle Riddle Patreon, but all episodes of Penguin Baseball are released now. So if you want to catch up now, patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle, five bucks a month gets you access to all of that. And then click the link in the episode description to buy some merch because the Penguin Baseball merch from Ariel somehow this year is truly awesome. I'd also love to read a five-star review if you want to get one featured on the show. You know, write a five-star review anywhere that you leave reviews. I might read it. Today I picked one called Five Stars Hands Down by Ad Byerly. It reads, The Chipotle at the BWI airport gives you a whole lot of sour cream. That is a good PSA to put in your five-star review. Great, great job.

JPC, would you believe the host of Wild and Crazy Kids was Omar Gooding, which is Cuba Gooding Jr. 's brother.

What?

And I conflated because his first name is Omar. Yes, it's yes. So Cuba Gooding Jr. 's brother Omar Gooding was the host of Wild and Crazy Kids.

I'm learning so much today. Hot dogs.

This has been a tape created by Adal Rifai starring Erin Keif and John Patrick Coan. Casey Toney did the editing. Marnie Perrins in the music.

Hey there, chitters and chatters. If you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. It's another edition of Chatterbox where we're answering your questions from the Discord. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com. Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your seven day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month. Plus you get those ad free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gum podcast. Hi, I am Mandy Moore.

Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan, and we host the podcast, That Was Us, now on HeadGum.

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