Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum Podcast.

Adal, Erin, I know that the two of you have been so mad that they are not putting comedy movies in theaters anymore. Well, do I have a shocking declaration for the two of you.

Shock me. Shock.

Okay, shock you. Let me rub my socks on the carpet. I just saw Nirvana, the band, the show, the movie, and it is fucking excellent.

Hummin' a what? Huh?

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Now wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Is this the movie that Variety called, it's insane that it exists? Yes. And fandom said, gives no fucks, a movie you absolutely must see to believe? Yes. You have to see this.

A comedic miracle, says Sunshine State Complex. A comedic miracle, JPC?

Yes, so the plot of the movie is they have a plan to book a show at the Rivoli, but something goes horribly wrong and then Matt and Jay accidentally travel back to the year 2008. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. You have to watch this movie. It is only in theaters starting February 13th. Nirvana, the band, the show, the movie. It is so fucking good.

I'm there.

I'm there. Okay, you are Erin Keif. Is this your first year entering into the ice cream cook-off?

Tis. I'm very excited to be here.

Well, you have a lot of cold competition.

Thanks. Oh my God. My cooler is burning hot.

Well, I can't wait to see what you have made for us.

Yeah. Is ice cream soup a thing? Has that been done? Hot ice cream soup.

I'm sorry, are you whispering at me or are you whispering to yourself or who's the whisperer?

I'm whispering to myself.

Great.

I can't wait to cream the competition. Okay.

Yuck. Yuck. Yuck. Yuck. Sorry. Sorry.

You can move on from me.

Great.

This is a long row of people. You don't have to stay here with me.

Zero out of 100. Thank you so much.

We haven't even started.

Oh, Adal Rifai. Welcome back.

Sorry, it's Adal Rifai.

I'm sorry. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm thinking of a different guy. Adal Rifai, this is your first year at the Ice Cream Cook-Off?

That is correct. Excellent. And what do you have for us today? I have an ice cream. Now what this is, is it's ice cream, but I've crushed Adderall and some uppers to put into it. So it makes you have a very good day.

Say no more, but no more.

You could just kiss one of the contestants. I would have given you a kiss if it meant I could win.

Apologies. You said Adderall and Uppers and I got very horny and I overstepped and I will go ahead and just give you an automatic pass. 100 out of 100. What the?

Okay.

Okay. And that brings us to the next booth. That's JPC's booth. Has anyone seen JPC? It seems like the booth is unmanned.

I think it's part of his big presentation. He says it has a lot of bells and whistles.

Oh, okay. A lot of bells and whistles.

Um, well, if there's no one at the booth, I kind of... So much, so much fog machine. What's going on?

Oh, wait, look up. He's dropping from the ceiling. Oh, that's the sky, honey. He hit so hard. Oh, yeah, he wasn't lowered down. He just dropped.

Whoa!

There's a plane getting away.

Oh, wait, that's not JPC. It's some sort of ice cream body. It's melting. Oh, well, just go ahead and grab a spoonful.

It's ice cream in the shape of a man.

Not terrible. No, that's a person. I like it. That's a person. I think we all just ate it. I really like it. If no one else is eating it.

Ooh, don't mind if I do. You scream, I scream, we all scream.

A little more sinewy. We got into the cannibalism stuff quick.

How are you? Tell me everything.

Me?

Yeah.

Okay. Looks around room.

I'm... Adal, how are you? Tell me everything.

Recording a podcast.

Wow.

What else? What else? What else? What else? I am walls and floor. I'm good. How are you, Erin?

I'm great. It's good to see you.

Good to see you. JPC, how are you doing?

When you guys... I'm okay. When you guys When someone asks you how you are, do you think that they're always fishing for the immediate ask back, or do you think that people are kind of panicking? Because I think how do you are, or how are you, kind of went out of fashion with the onset of the pandemic. The answer to that question has never been, great.

Yeah, no one's been good since 2019.

In the last six years, no one can honestly be like, pretty good, things are good.

I mean, I always see it as just the almost rhetorical question or almost like in lieu of hello, it's just like, how are you? Yeah. I don't think, rarely do I feel like people mean it as like a, how are you? Like, I really want to know how you're doing. I think it's more of like a, hey, how's it going? Kind of thing.

What do you, if you, if you could like collectively mid and black memory wipe, on the show.

Don't think.

Cashew.

Yeah, so you some people say cashew. Some people say like standing up in the shower. You know, it's like you're gonna get.

That's exhausting. And for what? And for what?

Easy clean up. I think I look at someone, I think I prefer instead of like, how are you or whatever that is, I think just saying Smabi.

Smabi. Smabi. You guys, we have a new word here at Hey Riddle Riddle that we started on a live stream, and it's smabi. And the cool thing about smabi is it means all sorts of things.

It can kind of mean whatever you want it to be. And I do feel like 2026 is the year of the smabi. The year of the smabi. Yeah.

If I'm not mistaken. It would be like a greeting of like, Uh, anything to hope for?

Anything to hope?

Any good news? Like, just wanting to hear anything positive, like knowing that it's mostly bad news.

Yeah. What about a, who do you think's coming to save us?

Who do you think is coming to save us?

Or even just a, this sucks, right? I feel like if we just greeted each other with, this sucks, right? It would be more positive because I could say, yes, in an enthused way versus, how's it going? And if they're really curious, it's like, well, am I great?

What about as a greeting, back to bed, huh? Where both people give each other permission to just go back to bed for the day. All right, back to bed.

We're all leaving our houses less and less, right?

Well, hey everyone, welcome to Hey Riddle Riddle. I'm JPC. I'm Adal Rifai.

And I'm Smabi. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. I'm going back to bed.

We should do... What did John and Yoko do? They did like a 24-hour sleep in or something?

Did they? Right? Didn't they have like a big... Okay, I love that.

This sounds so familiar, Adal, but I just don't know enough about the Beatles' lore. Yeah.

They did a cover of Rolling Stones magazine where he was naked and she was wearing a turtleneck and was clinging to him.

Oh yeah, she's sort of like grabbing onto him like a tick or something.

They did some sort of thing when they were in bed, like a photo shoot or something when they were in bed.

I think that's the one.

That's what you're talking about? But I think it was during, they did some sort of like, I don't know if it, what's the hotel that overlooks Central Park? The Plaza? Central Perk. Maybe Central Perk, thank you. And Gunther was there. I do feel like they did like a 24 hour, we're staying in bed to protest war or something.

Hey, well guess what guys, didn't fucking work.

I didn't know how much I was protesting war. Good for me.

I protest war 14 hours a day. I'm not depressed.

1130, I'm pretty late to protest war. I guess I'm not brushing my teeth today to protest, I want to say war. Man, they had it right in the 60s. They knew how to do it in the 60s. Oh yeah.

I've never been to Central Park. Really?

I need to remedy that, yeah.

It's quite lovely.

In Manhattan? Mm-hmm. Isn't Central Park like most of Manhattan? Central Park is like huge, right?

Yeah.

It's pretty massive. But you've never been there? Never been. I've been on the periphery, like I've been to restaurants and stuff around it, but I've never stepped a single foot inside of it.

How many years until you think billionaires decide to put a bunch of horrible condos in Central Park?

I think it'll be a golf course. I think they'll just make it like a private golf course. Oh, that would be so fun to get in 18 holes in the middle of Manhattan.

Oh, please.

Private golf courses, of course. All right, Riddles, puzzles, anything to hope for?

Who's coming to save us? Who do we think? Could we think?

Could we think? Speaking of who's coming to save us, which superhero is most likely to be real that could save us? That's a really great question.

I mean... Batman, because he doesn't really have any powers. He's just a bunch of like tech.

Okay so there is a billionaire coming to save us.

Is that what I meant to say? He's too busy playing golf. I think maybe probably the Punisher right because he's not a superhero he's just like a angry guy with guns but coming to save us that's the part I don't think I really don't think that the Punisher is really interested in saving us he's interested in like murdering like corrupt cops or whatever like he's not he's not really like a Fix stuff type of guy. More of a break what's already broken type of thing. Step on the broken glass.

Annie Lennox had it right.

Maybe Superman.

I think that the odds are better that it's like an alien lands on Earth and is interested in like making it better versus like someone from Earth kind of stepping up to the plate. I feel like I'm putting my odds on Taylor.

If it was going to happen, it would have already happened, right?

Sure, yeah.

Well, back to bed. No, no, guys, keep up, keep fighting the good fight. Pick up your swords. Come on. Come on, Adal, JPC, come on.

Yeah.

Come on.

Dragging my sword, you know, tip into the ground in the battle.

Guys, come on.

Uh, no, well, hey, we are gonna stay strong, we're gonna persevere, and part of what that is for us is doing, looking at my notes, fucking riddles, I guess?

Yeah. Alright.

If we're going to solve a problem, it starts with solving smaller problems.

Like Maria. First things first. How do you solve a problem like her, huh? Sound of music.

Yeah. Well, honestly, though, the good news is the riddles that we're going to be doing today came to us from 2019 when the world was a mildly better place. And so we'll, you know, still pretty bad. So, well basically, we get to do some little escapism and time travel. For instance, this one came from Steven, submitted in, hey, February of 2019, so six years ago. That's pretty cool. Nope, that's not right. That's seven years ago, right? Because it's 2026 and that's 2019. Yes. How do we think that works, huh? Seven years?

It's 828 in the morning. You cannot make me do this.

Steven, I want to tell you guys I love the podcast. I've written a riddle for you. Please grade it. I think you'll either get it immediately or stumped forever. Was grading riddles something we were doing in 2019 as a new one, remember?

That doesn't sound like us. No. But we could make an exception.

Steven asked for us to grade it, so if we are going to make an exception, now seems like the time.

Okay.

Kevin is out shopping. He approaches Suzy, who grabs a knife, gives Kevin a cut, and asks for his money. But Kevin runs away. Later, Kevin is arrested. And the question is, why was Kevin arrested?

Can you read it again?

I can absolutely read it again, Erin, and I would love nothing more. Kevin is out shopping. He approaches Suzy, who grabs a knife, gives Kevin a cut, and asks for his money. But Kevin runs away. Later, Kevin is arrested.

He dined and dashed a tattoo.

He dined and dashed a tattoo. He dined and dashed a tattoo.

Maybe, maybe I give up today.

Dined and dashed a tattoo.

I love that you're just like rolling it over in your mouth like it's like a wine that you're trying to find the notes of.

Erin, it's a pairing I've never had before. I don't hate it. I don't think there's a better way to say it. I love using dined and dashed to apply to things that aren't food. That's just good.

When I lived in Australia and my friend Connie got glassed, we went to the... Got what? Glassed. Apparently it's a thing in Australia where glass will explode and people get glass in them. It happens enough in that godforsaken continent that we... Get glass in them?

Did she just say in them? Glass just explodes?

This I was just as shocked as you are that that's a term that they used that glass just explodes. I went over to a party. They'd already been drinking for a while. They were celebrating passing a test because they're all like medical students. And I was talking to Connie, we're up against the refrigerator and a guy tried to open a champagne bottle with a knife, which is Hard to do if you've never done that before. And he did that and the champagne bottle exploded. And Connie got a huge piece of glass in her cheek right under her eye. And I got some little glass in my legs. And then I took her to the emergency room and she got stitches. And all she had to do was show her ID when she went in. And then we just walked out of the hospital when she was done. And I was like, do you have to pay a bill? Do we have to fill out paperwork? And she was like, no, it's just free. It's

Smabi.

Smabi. Smabi.

I don't want to smabi about this, but you said glass just explodes, and then you told the story of a man hitting a champagne bottle with a knife and then it exploding, which to me is not glass just explodes, it's someone exploding.

Well, when she went to the hospital, the person was like, have you ever been glassed before? And she went, actually, yes. And she has these scars on her chest from being at a bar where a thing, like a glass cup or something explodes on her.

What a wild thing to say. Have you ever been glassed before?

So not only are all the creatures in Australia trying to kill you, glass just explodes.

Yeah, glass has a mind of its own down there. And maybe you live in Australia and you're like, what the fuck are you talking about? And it was just these weird rural places in Western Australia that were dealing with being glassed. But either way.

I only know the term glassed, which I believe is like Military slang but also it may be like Star Wars space military slang when you like bombard something or bomb it so much that you've completely like destroyed the surface and then you say that you've like glassed it. Like I think I think there was an episode of The Mandalorian where they go back to his home planet and they say that it's completely glassed because it was destroyed by like orbital bombardment. So that's how I know the word glassed, but I'm not familiar with the Australian usage of the term.

I'm going to say F. Oh my god, are we in the middle of a riddle? Did we finish it? No.

Erin, you are, like, dined and dashed is like not wrong, but it's not during a tattoo appointment, but it's like so close. It's like you're... Dentist.

You're tangentially there. Shopping.

He's out shopping. He approaches Susie, who grabs a knife, gives him a cut, and asks for his money, but Kevin runs away. Later, Kevin is arrested, not Susie. No, this is a person who would like legit use a knife and I guess like Barbara you're thinking what like straight straight razor Yeah, or haircut, I guess but no it's Give a haircut with a knife.

Ear piercing.

No, not ear piercing.

Not surgery. He is out shopping that that I think is really really helpful It's not like he's going you wouldn't say like I'm going shopping and get a haircut you he's like legit shopping

Is she selling knives?

No, she does not sell knives. She's not selling knives. Is she cutting a tag off? That's a great guess. It's not a tag. Oh, hold on, hold on. Hey, Stephen gave us hints. Do you want some hints? Oh, yes, please. All right. Did Kevin Ashley commit any crimes? Yes. And if you can land on the crime that he committed, I'll give that to you so that that might help you. Was Susie the one pressing charges? Yes. Was Kevin's crime in the story? Yes.

It's him leaving is the crime.

Exactly, Erin. When he runs away, that's him committing.

She was giving him like a service.

Yeah, not... Yes, I guess, a little bit. Like goods and service, you know. Something in that category.

So she took out a knife and cut him.

No. No. She took out a knife. She grabs a knife and she gives Kevin a cut. It does not say that she cut him.

A cut of what? A cut of drugs.

A cut of... I love this. A cut of drugs. A cut of the prophets.

A cut of cheese.

Erin, it could be. Oh, it's a butcher. It's a butcher. Yes, it's a butcher.

Whoa.

So why was Kevin arrested? Because he stole. Yeah, she gives Kevin a cut, asks for his money, but Kevin runs away. So he stole the cut of meat. She cut some meat, she was a butcher, he ran away instead of paying for it, and she dropped a dime on him and she narked on him. So, who's really the hero of that story, huh?

Great, I'd like to see a scene.

Is it the Jean Valjean who was just trying to steal some meat for his family?

JPC, you are a butcher who recently got Adal in trouble for stealing from your shop. Adal, you're back in to try to be a paying customer, but it's a little awkward since the last time you saw him he was getting you in trouble.

Hey, hey, hey! Meat man! Yeah, hey. Hey.

I'm a... Look, I just want to say I'm sorry about the way that it all went down. I didn't need to go that way. I'm going to do a thing, though, from now on for you, Ned, where I just ask you to pay up front, basically, so we don't have to get into something.

Up front like the front of the store? I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

No, before obviously I sell you any meat, I'm going to have to see the money up front.

14 years! I'm sorry? Fourteen years for two ribeyes, huh? Kinda wild. Wait, that's what you got? You got fourteen years? Fourteen years. But I only served twelve, so... Huh.

God, why did I think— The justice system works! The justice system works!

I'm—I—wow, it seems like— So I'm celebrating seeing my kids again, so let's see what I want. You're adult. Huh? You're adult kids.

When you say kids, a lot of people think like, Mommy, daddy, you know, but it's like, they're adults now.

Oh yeah, I should say I'm gonna go see my adults. What's, what are we doing? Children, maybe. What the fuck are we doing? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Hey, I'm sorry.

Hey, sorry man, I just realized that I got all the way downtown before. I didn't pay for my filet. I just walked out without paying. I'm so sorry.

No worries, I just, I recorded it down. You can just pay at the end of the month if you need to.

Oh my gosh, thank you so much. I really, hey, I really appreciate that. What the fuck? Alright, have a good one. Have a good one. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what the fuck?

Oh yeah, we changed the policy. When was it? It was like 12 years ago maybe? Or 11? Maybe 11 years ago we changed the policy. So now it's just like, it's so much easier to keep a tab for everyone. You don't have to pay at the end of the month.

I'm

Yeah, well, now that I know, I could just kind of skip the pleasantry part of it and go, you know what? While you're here, your kids, Jeff and, oh, and his wife, Karen, they have a tab if you want to settle up their tab. It's two ribeyes. I'd rather, wait, what? They have a tab because they already bought two rib-eyes. Rib-eyes. Two rib-eyes.

Why does that sound familiar? Because that's what I was going to order was two rib-eyes.

Oh, you know what? That tab has already been paid. Because now, starting, when was it? 11, 12 years ago? We now do a promotion where every repeat customer just gets a free two rib-eyes every month. So, we actually don't even charge for two rib-eyes anymore. If you're just getting two rib-eyes.

I can't do this.

If you get two more ribeyes, of course, we would charge for that. But it's a free two ribeyes. Of course, your grandfather is out of that policy. The old policy.

I should go to a different butcher. I should go to a different... You know what? No. No.

You gonna walk out of here? You gonna walk out of the butcher store right now?

No, I need the steaks. I need the steaks. Do you have kids?

I have adult children. I had kids 12 years ago. Yeah, 12 years ago. Huh, okay. And that's 3 p.m. That's store closing time. Hey, you know what? You know what I'm gonna do? Just because we're old friends, just because we go back, I'm gonna kick you out of the store. Okay. You gotta go right now.

All right.

Well, I'm gonna go walk into the ocean. Nothing makes sense anymore. Okay. It's all bad. It's all bad. Okay.

Best of luck to you. All right. Fuck you. I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. Excuse me, sir. You walking into the ocean? Yep. Okay, that'll be $18.50. Seed.

Yeah, it's done.

Oh man, nothing like going to prison for 12 years. I'd give that riddle a B-. Erin, you gotta rank it.

I'm thinking. I'm gonna give it a C+.

I'm going to give it a C for clever, which is, of course, an A. We have another one from Dave. Dave writes this riddle. Back in the year of our Lord 2019, also in February, and as we've proved just six, nay, seven short years ago, every time Agatha rides the train, the conductor sees her and smiles, even though, invariably, she's breaking one of three laws. She's not breaking the law. Oh, I'm sorry. When she's not breaking the law, she smiles back. The conductor never calls the police and does not know Agatha outside of the train. The question is, what happened? So every time that Agatha rides the train, the conductor sees her and smiles, even though, invariably, she's breaking one of three laws. When she's not breaking the law, she smiles back. The conductor never calls the police and does not know Agatha outside of the train.

Agatha's a cat.

Agatha's a cat. Erin, you're on the right track, but Agatha is not a cat.

Agatha's a bird.

Erin, you're getting colder, a little colder.

Agatha's a dog.

Agatha... These are all lateral moves of not the right answer.

Agatha's a kid. Agatha's a baby.

Agatha's a baby.

And the law is public breastfeeding.

Okay, so there's three laws. One of them is not public breastfeeding, but they can be kind of... Well, no, I'm not even going to say kind. It's going to confuse you. Do you guys want to guess what the three laws the baby is breaking on the train? They're like train-specific ordinances, I would say.

Okay.

Not paying. Things you're not supposed to do on a train. Well, I know this from having a kid. Kids eat for free at Shoney's and they ride for free on the train.

No pooping on the train.

Defecating, no nudity. Ordinance three is no relieving oneself on the train. Erin, nudity probably would work, but let's assume that the baby is clothed for the duration of the train ride. So yeah, no relieving yourself on train. Al got one of them.

You can't be carried by another human.

That's allowed. That is allowed on trains. As soon as you get these I have a seed in my head. Oh, no screaming? No crying?

No screaming?

No, you can scream on the train. It's not encouraged, socially, but you're allowed to do it if you need to.

What laws do babies break?

You said breastfeeding, and it's not necessarily breastfeeding, but it is like... Indecent exposure? No, no, think of more of what law the baby would be breaking, not the law that the mother is breaking. I don't even know, I don't know if this one is one, this is one that I just wouldn't do on a train unless I absolutely had to, but maybe it's a rule.

Staring at other people?

No. I was going to say for the breastfeeding one, it's eating. No eating on trains. I guess that makes sense for cleanliness, but it's like the same reason why I don't need the thing that says no eating in the bathroom. I'm like, I'm not going to eat in here.

So no eating, no relieving yourself.

And then the last one, this feels like an anti-unhoused person. No sleeping? No sleeping on the train. Of course, babies love sleeping. I want to see a quick scene. Adal, you are a train I want to see train inspector, but that's not a real thing. But you're the person who enforces like a rule on a train. Again, these are not real. The trains are lawless, but you're a train rule enforcer. And Erin is breaking some like really unknown train rules. And you're just like gently letting her know that she's breaking those rules.

Ahoy hoy.

Oh, I've got my ticket right here if you want to scan it.

Okay, and a big beep, and okay. Just a heads up, is this your first time on the Rocky Mountain Express?

Yes, it is. I'm going to see family.

Oh, very good. For the holiday or just a vacation?

Uh, just a classic visit. It's actually been like 10 years since I came home. It's a whole thing.

Ah. Well, just so you know, you were looking out the window and giving a tight-lipped smile, and that is against the law.

Yeah, that's funny. Yeah, it's like one of those things where I'm like, should I be going home? Should I have reached back out to my family after everything that happened? So I'm just sort of staring out the window thinking about the choices that I've made and everything that's led me to this moment.

Okay, you broke a few more laws there, a few more train laws. You can't say it's funny without laughing because that's disrespectful. And there was something else, but I forget it. We'll let that other one go. Are you for real? We've

Hmm, smells like dirt and cheese. Okay, hey, hey, sir, I just wanted to be on this train ride in peace. I will not do anything else against the law. I will sit. I will be normal. I will close my eyes.

Excuse me, is this where you pay your tickets? Uh, yes? Okay, sorry. Yeah, I was the guy that said if the shoe fits, here is a check for $12.

Thank you so much. And you, let me undo those handcuffs. Thank you so much. Hard to write a check with your handcuffs. You are free to go.

I didn't realize this train was so... It had so many rules. You're trying to nickel and dime us.

You put it in ellipses in the middle of a sentence. I didn't know this train was so dot dot dot. That's another law. You know, I don't... You just... U-G-H-H-H-H personified? Ugh, that's another- you broke another law.

Well, you just said it, didn't you?

Calling me out for being hypocritical? Broke another law.

Really? Really? All right, sir. I'm gonna fight you. This is why I haven't seen my parents in a long time. It's cuz I- I fought my parents ten Christmases ago. It turned it out to a full-blown brawl. You think I'm not- you think I can't do it? Put him up. Put him up. Come on.

Hey, if you want to engage in some pugilism... Ooh, that's a good right cross. Ooh, a judo kick to the stomach. Ooh, flip me over the back.

Yo, what was that? What was that? She's spinning him like a basketball on her finger.

Yeah, so the answer there, because I don't think I spelled it out exactly, but as a baby, the conductor always smiles at her and ignores the letter of the law, understanding the spirit is not to apply to babies. Agatha doesn't smile back because she's sleeping, or she has a bottle in her mouth when feeding, or is straining to relieve herself with her eyes closed. The face that babies make when they poop is so funny. That is a priceless face.

Yeah.

Because it's probably a face that everybody makes, but we learn to, like, mask it. We learn not to show other people our poop face.

Do we feel like there's a lot of babies being named Agatha recently?

Oh, yeah. Because old names are in, and, like, people love Katherine Hahn, so it's like, for sure.

Down, down, down the road. Iris, Agatha. What else?

Great names.

Eunice.

Cute. I'm in.

I think they should have cast Katherine Hahn to play the Han Solo.

Smabi.

That would have been fun. Smabi. Erin and Smabi. Well, hey, look, that was fun and we appreciate everyone who read Swirdle seven years ago, but now it is time for a little break or something that we like to call a Smabi. Adal, Erin, I am so fed up with car shopping. I must be doing something wrong. Because I'll go to the grocery store, I'll buy, you know, some bananas, some apples, a little bit of spinach, and I'll get to the checkout, and I'll say, also I'd like to buy a car, and they say, well, no, not here. And I go, not here? Then where? JPC, you big dolt. Tell me what I did because what I think I did is right. So what did I do?

You don't go to a store to buy a car. You use CarGurus app, the new dealership mode, and it's like having a personal cheat sheet in your pocket right there on the lot with you. You can instantly compare the car in front of you With more than 4 million listings, CarGurus has the biggest selection of cars, so it's easier than ever to find the right car at the right deal. And you don't even have to buy a banana. Well, I want to buy the banana.

Oh. Please tell me CarGurus will sell me a banana. You know what? No. I think what I'll do from now on is I'll get my fruit at the fruit store and I'll get my cars by using CarGurus. You can even use CarGurus Discover, a new search feature where you can look for vehicles based on the way you think using your own words. No more being boxed in by filters. Whether you want great gas mileage for a road trip or extra trunk space for all of those bananas, simply type it in and CarGurus Discover will give you real, shoppable listings that match. It's the smarter way to find the car that fits your life and the insane amount of bananas that you buy at the store because bananas are going up up up baby and they never go bad.

And I used the CarGurus app to buy us, yanks off sheet, a Riddle Mobile. It's no wonder CarGurus is the number one most visited car shopping site according to SimilarWeb's estimated traffic data.

Buy or sell your next car today with CarGurus at CarGurus.com. Go to CarGurus.com to make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's CarGurus, C-A-R-G-U-R-U-S.com, CarGurus.com.

Okay, so it looks like the Riddle Mobile doesn't take gas. We have to answer riddles to make it good. Let's just leave it. Banana space. Oh, yeah. It's mostly for show. Hey, GPC. Hey, Erin. What's up, Al? Yeah, what's up? I was looking up at the night sky and seeing all these things shooting across the night sky, and I was wondering, what all is out there in the night sky?

Well, stars.

We're at war with the Palladians. What? UFOs. Wait, the Palladians? Are those some sort of aliens?

And rockets, which reminds me, this weekend, you guys, I realized that I had been spending so much money on a subscription that I forgot to cancel. I did the whole free trial thing, and then I forgot to cancel it, and I've been paying for it a couple months, but Rocket Money reminded me, yeah.

Oh, thank goodness. Please tell me that you're using Rocket Money, the personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

Oh, big time, big time.

And growing your savings is more important now than ever, what with the upcoming war with the Palladians on our doorstep.

Mm-hmm. Now, Palladians are paladin aliens, of course, and they come here wanting our, I want to say, oxygen. But with Rocket Money, you can set budgets and goals, get personalized insights and regular reports, and receive real-time alerts for large transactions, upcoming bills, refunds, and low balances, because you're going to want to save as much money as possible. You and your family can start to buy spaceship parts.

Plus, the app consolidates your checking, your saving, your loans, and investments into a single dashboard to give users a clear view of their financial picture. So, when you're spending money from the secret checking account that your wife doesn't know that you have to fight the Palladians, baby, it's for you. It's all for you. It's for the family. You can see that from your Rocket Board dashboard without getting overwhelmed that your wife is going to find out about your secret Palladian bank account that you're using to fight these guys.

And if you're saving up to fight the good fight, you can do automated savings that grow towards your goals. You can adjust the amount and the frequency, a set-it-and-forget-it approach. So let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join RocketMoney.com slash Riddle. That's RocketMoney.com slash Riddle. RocketMoney.com slash Riddle. R-I-D-D-L-E.

They look just like us.

You say joyfully. They look just like us. I want to say oxygen.

Erin, JPC, good morning to you.

Good morning to you, Adal, my dear.

You know how I used to give my money to the squirrel in my backyard to tuck away for a winter's night? Well, that squirrel ate all my money, so I've decided to use something a little more clever. Found.

Oh, thank goodness. Oh my gosh, it was so stressful when you're giving all your money to that squirrel. This is so much better.

Yeah, because that squirrel eats money and found eliminates the clutter by giving you one platform that handles it all. Banking, bookkeeping, invoices, and taxes. No more paying for multiple subscriptions and dealing with clunky outdated apps. No more trusting the squirrel who's a wild animal who lives in a tree who likes to eat money.

Yes, and it makes it easy to regain control of your business finances so you can get back to doing what you love, getting revenge on that squirrel.

And unlike the squirrel, Found has automated things like tracking expenses, finding write-offs, and budgeting for tax time. That squirrel last year cost me so much money during tax time.

Yeah, I know that's a headache time of year, the tax time. Just go to one place that is going to have it completely under control where all of your stuff is in one safe space.

And as a small business owner, aka tyrant, I love Found because it allows me to put all of those administrative tasks in one platform. I can get in, I can get out, saves me time, helps me streamline things. It's a really great platform if you are running a business.

But don't take it from them. Take it from me. This is nuts. No. Take back control of your business today. Open a Found account for free at found.com. That's F-O-U-N-D dot com. Found is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services are provided by a lead bank. Member FDIC. Join the hundreds of thousands who've already streamlined their finances with Found.

Erin, that is not a squirrel. That is Richard Kind in a squirrel costume. He is eating Adal's money.

I used to live with George Clooney.

Guys, I bet you've noticed that I'm super confident now. It's all kind of turned around for me. I keep getting compliments on my cashmere oversized v-neck sweater.

Whoa, Erin. Yeah. Did you get taller?

No, I'm just wearing my favorite brown Mongolian cashmere oversized v-neck sweater I got from Quince. Did you shrink? No, no, no.

What the heck?

I bet you thought this cost an arm and a leg. It did not. It did not.

Oh, you got turned inside out.

No, I'm wearing a really cute sweater from Quince.

Oh, we can see your bones.

Huh. That's a different thing. We'll talk about that after. Quince has the everyday essentials I love with quality that lasts. Organic cotton sweaters, polos for every occasion, lighter jackets that keep you warm in the changing season. The list goes on.

Yeah. And plus, doesn't Quince only partner with factories that meet rigorous standards for craftsmanship and ethical production? I think I remember knowing that about Quince.

Yeah. Just quality clothing. I also have a raincoat from them that is so good. It's the type of piece that you're going to keep for years and years and years.

I got a cable net sweater from Quince, and I kid you not, it is the only thing that I have ever followed the directions on to hand wash. Everything else that I own, I'm like, it says hand wash, but I'm not hand washing this. This is, it's so nice that I'm like, I must hand wash this. This is a nice sweater.

What I've discovered is since buying items from Quince, I just collect a few very nice items, and it's about quality over quantity.

I used to have like 40 different types of jackets, and now I just have two nice ones from Quince, and they pair well with everything.

Okay, so here's the deal.

I also love their home stuff.

Their home stuff is amazing. If you don't want to get your bones turned absolutely inside out like I was, I assume is what happened to Erin. We'll talk about that later.

I think that's just my body.

Refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash riddle for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too, eh? That's quince.com slash riddle. Free shipping and 365 day returns. quince.com slash riddle.

This one's on me guys. I did break my arm and didn't notice. No problem at all.

But you look good doing it.

I know.

And we're back. How was everybody's Smabi?

Pretty good. How's yours? What's the Smabi with you?

I took a brief Smabi. Did you wash your hands? Oh, no, I'll be right back.

I sing happy Smabi two times while I wash my hands. And that's how I know that I've washed for long enough.

And do you use soap and Smabi or do you?

I actually use, this is kind of strange, I use Herbal Smabi and I do that thing where I start lathering it up and suddenly the deep voice starts singing. Do you guys remember Herbal Smabi?

What are you talking about?

Herbal Essence commercials.

Oh, oh yes.

She got the herbal in the shower for another half an hour.

I blocked that out.

Erin, did you never have the urge to herbal?

I think I missed, I don't remember this ad campaign as well as you guys do.

Is Herbal Essence still around? It can't possibly be. And it is, sure.

I think I used it recently at a gym shower.

I don't think that they have as robust of an advertising presence as they used to have.

I feel like a lot of like remember was it Lipton iced tea Was it that's brisk, baby, and they had all those like claymation commercials. Yeah, Rocky Balboa and stuff like companies used to really Go nuts with fun commercials

I think, do you think it's just because everybody knows about it now? Or do you think that like Pantene Pro-V has like enough customers? They're like, we got the ones we need. We don't want any more. We're shutting the door on Pantene Pro-V. No one's ever going to just buy it on a whim.

Maybe. I don't know. What is it? Is it like, um, there's a certain type of root beer. Root beer doesn't advertise.

That's like that's because of their like old-timey beliefs. Root beer doesn't advertise.

Isn't that true? Do we learn that on this show?

I think so. Well, I know like get used to, right? Like I remember like A&W commercials and mug root beer commercials. I guess Barks has bite. Barks has bite. Yeah.

Maybe I'm wrong.

Hey, Erin, you could be completely right. It could be something that is true. I'm often wrong, so. Or maybe it's not true for a while. Hey, why don't we put that often wrong to the test and give you another riddle, huh?

Okay. Alright. Alright.

Oh, man, you guys are so pliable. I could do anything with you guys. You guys are just like weebles.

We wobble. We smabi. You don't fall down.

All right, We Smabi. This one's from Lila and Daisy, also from February of 2019. A man mailed a head when the person received it. He was not surprised or scared. Why? Lettuce.

Head of lettuce.

Okay. There's three possible answers that they include. Lettuce isn't one of them, but cabbage is, so I will give you that one.

Okay.

Can you give two other answers to why a person mailed a head and the person received it was not surprised or scared?

Mannequin.

I would be actually kind of scared if someone mailed me a mannequin head.

I do want to see a scene.

That's good. Please. Perfect.

I wonder what this is going to be. The two of you are a couple and you just received a package at the door that you had to sign for and inside was a mannequin head.

I got it.

Oh, yeah. Okay, great. Doug said he was going to be sending over a Christmas card or did he say card? I think he just said sending over a Christmas.

It might be one of those like fruit boxes that has like seasonal fruit in it.

God, Doug is so thoughtful. He, he gives the best gifts. He is such a thoughtful guy.

I'm really glad that you guys made up.

Oh, me too. I mean, again, he's thoughtful, but he's intense. And it's just like, it was so stupid, the fight, that it's like, it wasn't worth staying mad at him, you know? Right.

I mean, you're trying to help him, but I guess he was kind of embarrassed that you called him intense in front of that whole dinner party.

Yeah no I mean it was truly I was out of line and I apologized you know because it was like he it just again stupid miscommunication I'm glad it's water under the bridge now.

Yeah and I'm on your side I think that you did a great job repairing that relationship and I'm really proud of you.

Do you want to open it? Uh why don't you open it?

Okay all right.

Takes three big steps back. What are you doing? I am going to the kitchen to get you didn't you say you wanted a seltzer or

Nope.

No? Okay, well, I guess I was just kind of anticipating that you might want to- I just haven't seen you drinking much this morning. Takes another big step back.

Why are you backing up from the package? Do you think that there might be something in- Oh!

No, not really, not even at all. You know what? What? All this talk about me making up with Doug, I am now remembering I have not done that yet.

You say that you made up with Doug?

I guess I I said yes because I intend to in a way that it feels You have to get better at repairing your friendships.

You keep alienating our friends and you said yeah, I'm gonna call Duggan and make up.

Call Duggan Yeah, and it's like I did the whole conversation in my head so many times that it even feels like I've already done it so

What's in the box?

Why don't we take that box and throw it in the trash?

What's in the box? What's in the box?

It's not important and it's not, and I take a big step back, stop stepping towards me, and it's not even important what's in the box because it reminded me I gotta call Doug. So let's leave that outside.

Maybe this is an olive branch. Maybe this is an olive branch. Maybe...

Have you ever seen those videos where there's like a suspicious package and they shut down the whole block and they call those guys with like the big... They're wearing like... Hazmat suits.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Here's a funny idea. Why don't we throw that as far out into the street as we possibly can, call those guys, and... I don't know how to call those guys. Oh, I've got their number.

I have disagreements with my friends all the time and it doesn't lead to this. What is going on with you?

With me or with Doug?

With you. I'm trying to be on your side here, but you gotta meet me halfway.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, okay. Oh, meet you halfway. Why don't I walk halfway out of the apartment?

I'm just gonna open it. I think we're over and underestimating him all at once.

We're overthinking it? Okay, great.

All right, here I go, and I'm opening it, and... And there's a huge explosion unrelated. See? Perfect.

Someone in the neighboring apartment had a gas leak.

Explosion unrelated.

It was one of those boxes of seasonal fruit to make up for their fight.

Oh my god. That is something, a move that I would see like in a narrative, like a movie or something, where a huge unrelated explosion happens after all that and I'd be like, they're going to win Best Director. This is one of the smartest choices I think I've ever seen in the history of movie making.

Do you guys ever see the movie Mannequin with Kim Cattrall? Yeah. Cattrall? Cattrall? Cattrall. They do... Smabi. And I haven't seen it in like 30 years. Smabi. I haven't seen it in like 30 years, but I feel like they do the scene from Toy Story 3 where there's a moment where she is back to being a mannequin and she's on like a conveyor belt heading towards like a buzzsaw or something, right? And he has to run down and save her.

Really upsetting.

I guess that is the move from Toy Story 3.

My friend Damon loves that movie.

Who does?

Damon Royster.

Oh yeah.

He loves it.

I would say if someone, if I'm like a, if I work for Paramount and a desk comes across my script, if a script comes across my desk that's mannequin, I think I'm investigating this person.

Oh yeah, for sure.

Yeah, I'm gonna go, let's go check out their house. We're just gonna go and see and make sure.

Let me call in a tip.

I think as with every horror movie that I've ever seen in my life, once was enough for me to see this. Not even that I think Mannequin is especially horror-y, but it's never one that I saw decades ago and I've never revisited it.

Yeah, the best part is the guy from Designing Women, isn't it?

I think also, and this is just my guess, I think there's probably some problematic stuff that doesn't age well in the movie.

No. In an old movie?

Having sexual relations with the American that comes to mind? Something along those lines. I'm not exactly sure. There were two other answers. The head of lettuce sloshed cabbage is the best one. The other reasons why a person would not be surprised or scared to receive a head in the mail

I'm

Now, I guess I get that one if it's like... Oh no, that sucks.

That's nothing. That's a real head. That actually is so upsetting. Do not send body parts to a morgue. That's not how a morgue works.

Alright, well, we got this head. What do we do? Mail it? Uh, no, I think... Chief, I think you gotta drive that over pretty quick.

Let's mail it.

The other one is he sent it to himself at a different address. Uh, well anyway, uh, let's not go too far. So it's the same guy opening it as who sent it? That's why he's not surprised or scared?

These are all very upsetting things. Just have it be cabbage.

I think it should have just been cabbage. But either way, thank you for sending them in. Let's do another one. Yikes.

That was the craziest thing you've ever brought to us, JPC. JPC kills a lot of dead birds and brings it to us. Look what I got you guys. And that has got to be one of the craziest ones.

You guys keep telling me I'm a good boy. So that's kind of reinforcing the behavior.

Yeah, Adal, this one's on us.

So I came home the other day and I saw like white, little specks of white all over my yard. And I have a trauma response because of times where cats have dismantled birds in my yard and I've had to clean up like bird feathers where I was like, oh, no feathers. And then I saw that it was just like a little bit of ice that hadn't melted off the grass. And I was like, Oh, thank God, like I didn't know that I had it in me to have immediate reactions to like scattered pieces of white in my yard, but it was it was just snow. I yeah, I truly, truly, whoo, dodged a bullet on that one. Here's Robert's Riddle. 12 men walking by, 12 pears hanging high. Each took a pear and left 11 hanging there. How is this possible? 12 men walking by, 12 pairs hanging high. Each took a pair and left 11 hanging there.

Interesting. It's 12 angry men. Oh yeah. It's the people in the jury and they're leaving 11 people hanging in the courtroom because there's 11 people there for the... Waiting for the verdict?

These are physical pairs, not metaphorical pairs. Erin, you said you would have given it an A. I think that you are going to give this riddle not an A. That's my guess.

Today we're

That's again, you're thinking like, oh yeah, these are like the way that you answer these riddles. These are great guesses. But this is one of these ones that when I give you the answer, you're going to say, well, that's actually stupid. And I agree.

And how am I supposed to guess that? I'm so smart. I can't make my brain dumb. I'm just kidding.

I'm really dumb. Each took a pair and left 11 hanging there. I will say at the end of this, there are still just 11 pairs hanging in the tree. I give up. Giving up is a smart play.

He took the same pair.

Mercy. No, only one pair was taken down. Erin, do you want to just give up? Yeah, I give up. This is a good one to give up on.

Sure.

I think, I think give up on this one. So the answer is that the man's name was Each.

Huh?

Each took, okay.

So, so here's the thing. Here's the thing. Normally that's like a fine, acceptable answer.

Each not really a name. Well, Jack Eacher.

Stacey Each.

Let's see, who else? Each and Ong. Famous comedy duo, Each and Ong.

Adal, Adal, I don't want to do one.

Yeah, I know. Me neither.

I don't want to do one. Psst, Adal, I don't want to do it.

You got one?

No, no, no, I don't have one. I don't want to do it.

Okay, you're dismissed. Can you think of a celebrity, though, with just, like, with Each in their name?

Oh, me? No. No, certainly not. No, no thank you.

Alright, well hey, Erin, you don't have to play.

Okay, thank you guys, thanks. How are you?

Well, hey, we need the ball in the jersey. Oh, I mean, um... We need the ball in the jersey.

Back to bed.

Alright, here's your next one, here's your next one.

I hate, hey, hey, F.

F for that one. F, I thought so. I thought so. Still had to read it. Still had to read it. Here's your next one from T. T says, in the letter T, not the drink. Or, I guess T's not necessarily a drink.

Gossip.

And it's not the gossip, it's just the letter T. Six little grapes hanging on two vines. Three black cherries in a line. Tumbling and rolling and all playing fair. Four round peaches makes a square.

See, here's the thing. I couldn't even pay attention to this riddle because every word you said, I was like, could that be someone's name? That's a name. His name is Tumbling. His name is Cherries. Because now, the rules are out the window.

Yeah. Anything goes at this point. Anything goes at this point. Okay, here, let me help you guys because I'm going to help you with a little palate cleanser. This is going to be a little bit of ginger that I'm applying to your tongue. Yes, yes, yes. Which, by the way, I understand the purpose of the ginger palate cleanser, but I don't like it. Do you use it when you're eating sushi? I do.

Ginger can be a little overpowering for my palate sometimes.

Yeah.

Like it gets stuck. It has kind of the opposite effect to me occasionally.

I'll show my ass here.

What do you think?

Um, I don't- Pretty, pretty tight.

Pretty good. Bounced a quarter off that bad boy.

Oh! It didn't bounce! It didn't bounce! It went in! It went in! Right in the hole.

Jackpot! Too good a name.

Ooh, and look, I'm paying out.

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! Ew!

Well, of course, Erin. Sorry. Sorry for fucking living. I don't know what you want from me. I guess I'm really sorry. God damn it. Because he shot a corner in my ass and I paid out. Fine. Fuck. Can we move on Erin? Are we still talking? It's only the first episode. We got more episodes to record today. What I was going to ask is do you use the palate cleanser, the ginger, when you're switching between sushis? Why do you use the palate cleanser?

Um, I typically use it if I have like, if I'm eating like a spicy tuna roll. Okay. Like if I have spicy tuna roll and then I switch to like nigiri, I got to use it as just like a, cause a roll is going to have like a lot of possible, possible sauces or just a lot going on. And then with nigiri, it's like, Oh, you want to taste just the fish. So that's when I use it. I don't use it after like every piece or if I, if I. Sure. In between different types of fish. I think it's most, I use it exclusively between rolls and nigiri. Got it, got it, got it. Or sashimi.

Hmm, okay.

I think since I'm a vegetarian and whenever I eat sushi, it's like, it's always vegetarian sushi. I'm genuinely like, there's not like a, I can go from like a sweet potato roll to a avocado roll and it's not like, it's not like a huge issue for me. So maybe that's why I never, I never use the palate cleanser. Um, okay. But, uh, this is, this is, there's not really like a, it's not going to be the same type of like bad trick. I actually like this Riddle. There, there is a, it's, um, It's not like, when it's describing these things, it's not describing the actual physical things, but it's a manifestation of these. So I'm going to give it to you one more time. Okay. Six little grapes hanging on two vines. Three black cherries in a line. Tumbling and rolling and all playing fair. Four round peaches makes a square.

Now, JPC, were you giving us a hint earlier when your ass paid out? Not a sentence I thought I'd say today. Is this describing a jackpot reel?

Oh, you're so smart.

Adal? It's not. Okay, because in jackpot reels there's always like the cherry and then like the there'll be an orange or something you're trying to get them all lined up.

These I will say that these are not actual fruits. I don't get it. I got it right? Explain please. So all of these things are manifestations of things that you would see on the face of a dice. Six little grapes hanging on two vines. Oh, boxcars. Yeah, three black lines up and down, which is a six. Three black cherries in a line is a line, which is the three. That's how you represent the three on the dice. And then four round peaches makes a square. A four on dice is a square of black dots, basically. Wow. If it's white dice. And then they said, bonus points if you knew that grape seeds and the dots on dice are both called pips.

I knew the dots on dice were called pips. I did not know that grapeseeds were called pips.

It's in the New York Times crossword constantly.

Yeah, I feel like that's a... So, Erin, you get bonus points for the crossword thing, and Adal, you get bonus points for the dice thing.

F. Bonus points? That was the main answer.

Well, no, the dice are called pips. You know about the pips. Oh, yes, I do. And I know about Gladys Knight.

I was just going to say, whose backup band was the pips, and it was Gladys Knight, I think. I think it was Gladys Knight.

I was just going to... I get the bonus points, so we all got a little bonus points. Is it true that between the three of us, you think there's one smart person?

No. I don't think. I think we are... Huh. What is the intelligence of the three of our intelligence combined? And how can I say this without insulting anybody?

I can't. Let's see. The three of us combined has the same intelligence of an average dog who's been dead for less than 12 hours. I'd agree to that. I'm not insulted by that.

Yeah. If it's true, then you can't really be mad.

We all are wearing lab coats. We all go to shake hands and we all miss.

Here in school, you get your test back and it just says, it says grade dead dog. See me after class.

Oh, I'm improving!

It says see me after class and then there's just a picture of the ocean and someone walking into it. Go see that after class.

Alright.

Okay, why not? I don't live in Atlantis. Let's do one more riddle, okay? Okay. Let's do one from, hmm, Filipe? Filipe in Brazil. I'll say Filipe. In two wallets, there are two dollars. At the same time, one of them has twice the money compared to the other. How is that possible?

So, in two wallets, there's two dollars, meaning one has zero money, one has two dollars, which would therefore mean the one that has two dollars has twice as much money as the other. You can't do twice as much as zero. I guess two is not twice as much as zero.

Yes. In two wallets, there are two dollars. At the same time, one of them has twice the money compared to the other. How is that possible? This is a mindfuck.

This is tough. Is it different types of currency, like a dollar versus like a peso or something?

If I'm solving this, Adal, that's exactly where my mind's going to, some sort of like currency conversion, but it's not that. Let's assume for this that they're the same type of currency. So it's like we're working on the same units here.

Can you read it again?

in the Three scientists, we're all shaking hands. Ow, ow, my fingers! It's my fingies! No, it doesn't have anything to do... I don't think you really need to know what even the type of currency is. I could just say it's like a dollar bill. It's not the currency that is the important part here.

Two wallets have two dollars. It's not the currency that's important, so it's the wallets that are important. Oh, now the game is afoot. It's...

There's gold on one of the wallets and the price of gold fluctuates.

No, you don't need to know the price of gold. In two wallets, there are two dollars. At the same time, one of them has twice the money compared to the other. How is that possible? One is a digital wallet.

Oh, that's okay. Speak on that. There's a fee for taking money out. Okay.

Um, here's the hint that I'll give you guys. And this is, I, I don't really know how to give like a hint hint to this. I'm going to like give you half the solution. Think about the size of these wallets. That's the important part. Okay. These wallets I would say are not the same size. Big wallet, little wallet. Big wallet, little wallet.

Twice as much money.

I feel dumb. While we think, I just want to see a quick scene. This is going to be one of these PBS kids shows and it's about money management and it's the two cartoon hosts are Big Wallet and Little Wallet. I'll let you guys decide who's Big Wallet and who's Little Wallet.

Big Wallet! Big Wallet! Yes, Little Wallet? Is it true that you should diversify your portfolio?

That's right, Little Wallet. Don't put all your money in one place.

Big Wallet, is it true that you sort of amassed a bunch of wealth and then slammed the door behind you, making sure no one younger than you could ever own property or live the American dream?

Yes and no, Little Wallet. I'd say more I pulled the ladder up behind me than slammed the door shut.

It's kind of a bad plan though because the real estate that you bought is in the middle of the suburbs and people my age are not really interested in living in horrible, poorly made McMansions in the middle of nowhere. Who are you going to sell that to when it comes time to sell? That's your entire plan for your senior living is selling that property.

Well, not exactly selling. See, I bought up 40 properties and what I'm doing is turning them into Airbnbs. So you're a landlord. And kids, there's nothing wrong with being a landlord.

Mm-hmm.

Can we watch Bluey? Z, please. Z. A little three-year-old watching that being like, off. Off, off. Please turn off. Okay, wallets of different sizes. Did we get it? Do we think we have it? Do we think we're close?

Uh, no.

I don't even feel like I'm on the track of anything.

Is it to do with like, since you said it doesn't really have to do with the money and it has to do with the size of the wallet, is it like a bill fold versus like the bill not being folded? So it's like the size of the dollar is twice the size kind of thing?

Yeah, I mean, that could be part of the answer. Like, yes, I will say, again, one of these wallets is like way bigger than the other wallet. And then I'll read it again. So keep in mind, when you're picturing these wallets, one is huge, one is small. In two wallets, there are two dollars. At the same time, one of them has twice the money compared to the other. How is that possible? And then the other thing I'll say is think inception.

Oh, one wallet is inside the other wallet for a second? Erin, yes. That's so stupid. F, F, F, F, F.

Wild. Hot dogs, let's get out of here. No, no, no, no, no. First of all, you can't just scream hot dogs.

I can and I will and I just fucking did.

Before we scream hot dogs and get out of here everybody, what we're going to do is we are, and I think, is it Hot Dog Delivery Patreons?

Yes!

We're gonna listen to a little voicemail. Casey, can you play us a theme?

Can you imagine people in like the 1400s in like Salzburg listening to that in a concert hall?

I'm not kidding, when they are lowering my casket into the ground, if that's not playing, then something has gone horribly wrong. That was brutal and awesome.

That's by far my favorite voicemail we've ever received.

I've got some good news for everybody and especially good news for our submitter. That was submitted by Jade Cipher, he, they. Jade writes that I'm submitting four voicemail-themed submissions in honor of the 2025 Out of Context Bracket. So the next I will say, like, probably four episodes of Hey Riddle Riddle. We will be featuring Jade's voicemails, and we started off with Erin's. If you want to get a voicemail theme submitted or featured on the show, just make sure it's 30 seconds or less and send it as a waveform to hrrpodcast at gmail.com. Casey, can we have a voicemail?

Hi, guys. I found myself in a weird position this last weekend where I was trying to explain my knowledge of the band Fish to my wife. And I realized that I only have context of fish based on jokes. And I was wondering if you guys had any cultural phenomenon that you only knew through the lens of comedy. Thanks guys. Love ya.

Ooh, thank you so much for the voicemail on the question. That's a great question. Yeah. There's a lot I only know through sort of pop culture or it being in the zeitgeist. Like, I mean, the first thing off the top of my head, and this is the dumbest one possible, and it's not really a cultural phenomenon, but like, we bought a zoo. It's like, there's stuff like that where I'm like, I just know the bare minimum to like poke fun at it, but I've never seen it and I don't really know what it's about or anything like that.

That's a great example.

I feel like there's too much. In the subject of movies,

I feel like I got so much of that from watching like parody movies, like watching like Airplane, or Hot Shots Part Deux, or like Scary Movie, where they would be parodying something, but I would not be familiar with the thing that they're parodying. So I was just like, Oh, this is funny. And then like years later, I'd be like, Oh, that's why that's funny, because it's, it's this other thing. But I'm, I'm usually I have huge blind spots for like things for movies that I just haven't seen.

Fish is a good one, though, because, yeah, I don't know if I could name a single fish song. No.

I haven't seen The Squeakquel, and I bring that up a lot. It's in my periphery.

Yeah. Also, being like, oh, yeah, I love The Simpsons, but I, like, have only ever seen, like, five to ten years of Simpsons, and there's, like, forty years of Simpsons, being like, yeah, it's like, oh, yeah, I just don't, I don't actually have an appreciation for this thing as a whole.

Erin, you saying squeak well makes me think of... probably a big one for a lot of people, which is there was a time and place where people used to say anytime they would name a fake sequel, they'd say blank blank electric boogaloo. Yeah. Which is based off the movie Breakin'. Breakin'. But I don't think, I don't know anyone in the world who's seen Breakin' or Breakin' 2 electric boogaloo, but that reference has been used by millions of people.

This is such a great like dinner party question. I'm going to be thinking about this for a minute.

I want to go watch Breaking.

And I want to see what Erin has cooked us all for dinner now that we're here. It's a head of cabbage. Hot dogs. Well before we get to Erin trying to end the episode yet again, does anyone have anything that they would like to plug? Erin, anything that you have coming up that you'd like to plug?

No.

Can't wait to ask Adal. Adal, what about you?

I want to plug Erin's plugs.

Oh great, and I will use my plugs to kind of combo off of that and just say, listen to Hello From the Magic Tavern, listen to Gumshoes and Dragons, go see Quality Time Out in LA, subscribe to the Patreon, it's fun! We're over there doing Patreon stuff every time with more episodes. Okay, Erin, save the planet! Hot dogs! Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter, Jupiter

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That was a hate gun podcast.