Which Riddle Riddle?

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Hey Riddle Riddle.

peanutbutter.com.

Did you say peanutbutter.com?

Nope.

Will, Adal, Erin, that's the start of the episode. We're back. It's Hey Riddle Riddle. It's your favorite, guys. It's the brand new year, 2026. We finally made it. And as you all know, and I'm JPC as well.

And I'm Adal Rifai.

And I'm Erin Keif.

And I'm Keif. It's a little tradition on the show. Every year, people know we record these a little bit advanced so we can take a little bit of a holiday break. So it leaves us a little bit of a gap. But it's 2026 and we have to say, Who do we think is dying in 2026? There's a lot of people that deserve it, but it's time to make our yearly predictions, okay?

Okay, okay. I'm gonna say it.

Number one with a bullet. And I'm not saying that's how he's going to go.

I was gonna say, be careful, be careful, be careful.

It's a bullet point, and I'm not saying it's a point that's gonna get him either. Popeye the Sailor Man. If you think about it, Popeye the Sailor Man gotta be in his mid-hundreds at this point.

Yeah, too good for too long, this guy.

Yeah.

Great diet, obviously. A lot of iron. Uh-huh. And chicken sandwiches. Uh-huh. Butt smokes a pipe, so... Butt smokes a pipe. Well, butt smokes a pipe. Stop telling us your search history.

Wait. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

A pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe.

Butt smokes a pipe. Butt smokes a pipe

Let's see, who's going to kick the bucket this year?

Vanessa, we're not saying that's how they go out.

Well, I think Alfred E. Newman. Okay.

Annuarism.

Erin, you were... Oh, now I can only think about Popeye dying. Who else is going to go out this year?

I got to say, The Penguin.

The TV show.

Yep, I think the TV show, I think a second season is due, and then I think it's getting cancelled.

I'm gonna call it.

Tom Cruise.

Dead as a doornail by December 31st.

Doing one of his little stunts, Erin? Yeah. That's how he'd like to go out. I think he really would like to go out that way. Solidify himself as like the last action hero.

Uh, you know how like when like a show has like a ton of hype behind it and they announce that it gets renewed before the first season like before the first episode drops? I think they did that with the original Game of Thrones. I think that there was like there were so many people pirating it before Game of Thrones season one came out that before the first episode dropped they were like we renewed it for a season two. We're calling our shot here. I would love it if they did the opposite and not cancel the show, like they don't air the episodes, but like midway through the first episode of like a new prestige show coming out, they're just like, and this show has not been renewed for season two. Enjoy all of season one. We really fucked up with this.

It's not great.

It's not great. Still watch it all. We're going to air it all. It's going to come out every week. But, uh, oh boy, we messed up.

I think we're also going to find Elvis alive on like some Polynesian island and then I think he's going to die this year.

Love that.

I would love it if that's the way that you found out though. It's not that you find him alive. They just announce, hey guys, sorry about this. Elvis has actually died. The real Elvis has passed away. We take you now. It's just like, you don't get a chance to see Elvis. It's still a toilet. He still died in a toilet.

Good news, bad news, guys. John Lennon faked his death, but he did just pass away this morning from complications from surgery.

But to make it so that you don't have to change your headcanon, we did have... Oh, what's the guy that shot John Lennon, Erin?

Oh, um...

Cameron Winter, Henry Winkler, John Hinckley, Mark David Chapman. Before the Doctors called Time of Death, we had Mark David Chapman come in one more time and shoot John Lennon. Just so you don't have to change the way he died in your head, you just have to adjust the year. That's nice for you.

You just add 45 years and then you're good. 46, because he's dying next year.

Yeah, because he's dying this year. Because it is this year now. Oh, right. It's this year. It's 2026. Let's start over.

Did you say peanutbutter.com?

Let's start our in memoriam. Imagine all the people.

Elvis on a toilet. Tom Cruise literally kicking a bucket.

Popeye.

Popeye.

Forearms exploding.

If they did an In Memoriam at the Oscars, and it was all cartoons and then one human being, I think that would be... They need to do more In Memoriam jokes. I know it's always like a somber, serious moment, but I think that needs some comedy.

No, don't put a joke next to my black and white photo when I die. Come on. Don't do a joke.

They're showing celebrities and then it's Betty Boop and then Erin and everyone's still laughing for Betty Boop.

Or there's like way more applause for Betty Boop and then it's sort of like... A lot of coughs for Erin.

All those in-memoriam photos should be super serious but they should do one funny one like when Jeff Daniels dies they just do the gif of him on the toilet from Dumb and Dumber and everyone's like, come on man.

That's awesome. That's the move.

And then everyone's like still laughing and then it's like, uh, Helen Mirren and they're like, oh, well, come on. Come on. Helen Mirren's clip has just run off Jeff Daniels' blasting diarrhea laughter.

It's all her scenes from Caligula and be like, what are we doing?

Come on.

If you, as an actor, ever did full frontal nudity, that is your in-memoriam thing. Because honestly, if you did full frontal nudity, you probably did it at the time in your life where you were like, yeah, let's go, man. Let's show this dong off to this—what was Willem Dafoe's thing? This confusing penis?

Oh yeah. Oh, GPC, I purposely hit delete on that. Did you not know? Please don't hand me things that I've already deleted from my brain.

It's like Adal processes KyleXY. It's an instant drag to trash.

I'm something of a scientist myself.

In Adal's defense, if I were Adal and I was looking through the files of my brain and I saw a KyleXY file, I would immediately drag it to the trash. I'd go, I'm not going to need this.

KyleXY is what you name the file on your desktop where you hide your porn because you don't know what's clicking into the thing.

No, you know where you hide it is in the porn folder. Because if you're a comedian and you have a porn folder on your desktop, they're like, haha, that must be like your important documentation. No, it's literal. That's where I keep all my internet porn. It's just the app for the internet in my porn folder.

People aren't saving porn like that anymore, right? I said I mentioned that, but I was like, that feels like something that I did back in my, like, early 20s when there wasn't the same access. You would have to, like, download things.

Dead silence.

Yeah, it feels like post-Limewire. That's not a thing.

Were people downloading porn on, like, Kazaa, Napster, and Limewire?

Oh, Erin, sweet summer child.

Well, Erin, I think... That was slightly before my time of when I was interested in porn, so I don't know.

I feel like there's a time on those sites where it was like, oh, like a friend of mine or my roommate is downloading the Dave Matthews Lily sessions or something. The White Sessions, whatever those are called. And then it finishes downloading and somebody pranked the downloaders and named it something else so that it, you know, they're downloading porn.

It's just hardcore porn with the... It was like the original Rick Roll, like...

Back in those days you could also it would also be like oh, I didn't know this was a Weird Al song I've never heard of and you download it and it's just like not a Weird Al song It's just like something that's like mislabeled that it's like it's like a parody song But it's not Weird Al and you're like why would anyone what is what is going on with this?

It's a white guy with acoustic guitar singing gin and juice.

Mm-hmm You know how porn websites give like a breakdown of like what people are watching in different parts of the country and what different demographics are watching

Here's what's going on in your neck of the woman.

Are you watching the 6pm Daily Porn News?

Here's what's going on in your neck of the woman? Holy, did you just say peanutbutter.com?

I think I meant that to be more like a blowjob thing, but I think it sounded more like a... Neck of the woman is not like a phrase that you should say. I didn't mean it in like a killer way.

That's so funny.

But I want the data on like where people are getting their porn. Like OnlyFans has had such a renaissance, which is actually I think great because then you're paying people directly and who are in it and they're not being as exploited, I hope, as they were before. It's the OnlyFan-naissance. Yes, OnlyFans. And that's how history will remember this time. But are people like I wonder what people are downloading stuff. And like what where people are getting it.

See, I'll go on unlimited vulnerable here and say that I'm not I know about OnlyFans, but I've never used OnlyFans and I've never like, subscribed to an OnlyFans. But the the amount of interaction that I have with OnlyFans is sometimes seeing Reddit posts that are like the top five OnlyFans We're How about the little guy making homemade porn just for themselves?

Another headgum podcast, I'm actually not sure if they're still going, I think they are, called Girls on Porn that I listen to. Oh yeah. And I learned so much and it's, there's, I think that in the last like 10 years there has been a renaissance in like ethical consumption of porn. Of like it being better to pay a little to make sure that no one is being exploited or taken advantage of or just not being paid at all. So just something to consider out there if you have a little extra money.

It's like how legalizing sex work will like eliminate the pimp profession, you know? Yeah, exactly. There are ways to make sex work safer across the board and less exploitative. And the people that insist that like sex work is bad are the people that are like actively legislating to make it more restrictive and thus like letting a criminal underbelly like exist in it.

And you're not going to believe that those people have really predictable porn searches. Turns out they love porn.

Okay, looking at notes. Okay, so we covered which porn is going to die in 2026.

This is a riddle podcast, technically still. I love this little riddle podcast. I don't care what you say, JPC and Adal. Huh? I love it, too. They love it, too.

We love it, too. It's chugging along like a woman's neck. Should we do some... I'm going to find a way to make it right. Should we do some riddles, guys? Would you like to do some riddles?

Yeah. It's your episode, your old man puzzles. on the show.

Last year, was last year Googling? Fail.

Hey guys, let's not do this whole song and dance. We fail within the first five weeks.

Let's give up song and dances.

Oh, that's harder for Erin. Erin, do you want to do it?

No. I wish we could play a montage of like, no Australian accents this year, and like two weeks later, Adal being like, G'day mate! No Googling this year, ten minutes later.

Alright, well you know what? We're not going to give anything up this year then. Fine. Fuck it. We're just going to do the show and we're going to make it fucking real for you.

Why are we withholding? Let's add something.

Let's go ahead and say that we're all going to start doing something.

Yes, let's be active. We're not going to be withholding anything. We're going to be adding something. So what should we add?

Hmm, you know how in a musical sometimes, like in the middle of like a song, they'll just do like 30 seconds and when you're listening to it, you're like, what is this? But you know that what's happening is a dance break. Let's maybe do that for the podcast.

You won't hear us.

You won't hear us dance, but you will hear 30 seconds of music and just know that we're like going hard on a dance.

JPC, I love this idea. Whenever we remember to do this this year, I'm going to set up a scene and it's a no-dialogue scene. And it will just be 30 seconds of music, okay? And we're going to be doing a lot of really funny physical comedy that you cannot see and you will never see, but just picture it in your head like you're listening to a Broadway cast recording and there's a dance break happening. So that being said,

If you set up a scene, Erin, where it's like me and Adal doing that, can you not in the scene be going, oh, oh, oh.

You want me to do that or you don't want me to do it?

I don't know.

Well, it depends. I think it's case by case. OK, ready?

Yeah.

Here's the scene I want to see. You guys are... She's just looking up.

She has nothing.

No, no, no. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. JPC, you are a museum security guard, and you are protecting a painting. And Adal, you are a thief that's sneaking in to get it. And all sorts of hijinks kind of ensue.

But you're saying that this is the dance? This is the dance?

This is 30, well, like, Casey's gonna play some music to underscore your scene. So that, here we go. And no dialogue. Hold on, hold on, hold on.

We're doing a scene and Casey's underscoring it with music. Isn't that just what we do on the show?

Yeah, but you're not talking at all.

Oh, thank God. Okay, good.

Yeah, you guys are not... You can't say a single word. You can't make any noises. Completely silent.

Does my guy have an accent?

What?

Does my guy have an accent?

Yeah, of course.

Just for my own personal... Yeah.

Okay. If you want to set the scene in any sort of way of what's going on before it starts.

Okay. And can I make Mr. Bean-like noises?

No. No noise. This is a silent movie.

But Mr. Bean-like noises. Oh, like that?

Yeah, but that's gonna be drowned out. So people should know that he's making noises like that.

Can Adal and I make noises and talk and then Casey just mutes it all later? What if we say lines of dialogue and then Casey turns those lines of dialogue into music?

Casey, do you have time for that?

So me being like, I'm going to steal this Renoir becomes like, Oh, that's right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Do the Eric Clapton guitar talk.

This is just going to be 30 seconds of sneaking music. Everybody picture the scene I just described.

And scene. Okay, let's do some riddles. That was me calling the end of the scene.

I loved it. Adal, that is truly the most impressive physical comedy I've ever seen in my life. That was some Danny Kaye shit, Adal.

Thank you.

Wow.

Do you think people will realize that I slipped and ate shit four seconds into that scene and just spent the rest of the time on the floor grabbing my knee?

People are, we're like almost eight years into the show, people pictured the exact right thing during that time. That's right.

Speaking of the exact right thing, why don't we move on to some riddles and this first riddle is from Olive in Austin. Olive writes, This is a country without a land. Its kings and dignitaries are lifeless. If the king is annihilated, no one is left alive.

Old Country Buffet?

Chess, but different. You guys are both right.

Chess. Erin, recently in New York I saw Chess, but Different.

And how was it?

Different.

Yep.

They tried to make it very topical.

One night in Bangkok and the world's your oyster.

Is that a song from Chess? Yes. Oh yeah. They did a thing in chess where, and here's the thing, JPC, up until like three years ago, I thought it was just like a top 40 hit in the 80s, but turns out it's linked to a musical. Originally? Originally. In this new version of chess, they take Aaron Tveit, is that his name? Tveit, I think. Tveit, and while he's singing that song, he's like pantless because he was, I guess, you know, doing his thing, and like two or three people pick him up in the air, and as they like, As he like spins in the air, they bring him down into a pair of pants and then he zips up his pants and the place went nuts.

Yeah, hold on.

It's hard to describe what happened. He basically got flipped into a pair of pants.

Adal. I would like to see a scene. It's completely silent and it's Adal being flipped into a pair of pants. Hit it.

And scene. This is not that impressive. This is how I get my toddler into pants most, I will say most days.

That's so funny. The song Nobody's Side from Chess. I don't know if you remember this. It was a real rock bottom wake up call for me. It was my most listened to song in my Spotify rap for 2023.

Erin, are we doing okay?

No, I think I listened to it like 300 something times.

Oh my god. I don't want to make this a referendum on Chess the Musical, but if you told me there was a musical called Chess, I would assume it was about, like, Queen's Gambit type, you know, like, this is going to be a musical about the board game chess.

What if I told you it was about the Cold War?

I mean, I guess that's close enough, right? Because I feel like, you know, chess plus the Cold War.

And also chess.

And the love triangle. So that's what it's about. It's about the Cold War and chess. And the love triangle.

That's for us to know and for you to find out. But it's mostly about a guy flipping into a pair of pants.

Yeah. Everything that we were saying about chess, it was like, and I was like, I don't, I can't make heads or tails of what this musical is about.

No, let this live in your periphery forever. It grows in the woods. It hangs in a shop. When you touch it, it cries.

It grows in the woods. It hangs in a shop. When you touch it, it cries. Onion.

Yeah, Erin, I was going to say icicle would work maybe like if when you touch it, you cried.

Onionsicle.

Oh, I love it when Jimmy John's puts out the onionsicle every year. The McRib is back and the onionsicle available now.

Cold Cold Onions brought to you by Jimmy John's. It's Jimmy John's. You can smell us down the street.

Erin, you've been out in the West Coast for so long. Do you miss the icicles? Do you miss the icicles and the snow?

I did see some pictures of New York in the snow yesterday, and I just missed it. I was like, it would be so fun to put on some snow boots and waddle over to a diner right now and get like a coffee and a waffle at a diner. I do think that cold weather Like, helps your internal rhythm more. Like, I have a hard time with time now that I live in California. Like, nothing really feels real. You kind of feel like you're living on a movie set. And I love, like, when trees change, you're like, yeah, time is passing. This makes sense. In winter, I have an excuse to rest more. And out here, it's just, like, gorgeous every day. And you're like, huh. What to do with this?

Yeah, hard to track the passage of time.

I want to very quickly speaking of Jimmy John's who's the guy the lead from the new Knives Out movie Josh Mr. Challengers, yeah, Mr. Challengers that guy the British guy Josh O'Connor. Yeah, I think so Josh O'Connor He did an interview where he was talking about his love of America. What he loves about America is discovering fast-food chains and he said he was shooting something in Ohio and he's like I was in Ohio and there's a strip mall and it was just this row of amazing and they had a Jimmy John's and I love, it was like, I love Jimmy John's and he's like going off on Jimmy John's and I was like- He's gotta go on Doughboys. This really makes me want to eat Jimmy John's. Like, I eat Jimmy John's two times a week anyway.

I was gonna say, there's a lot of things that make me really want Jimmy John's, like driving past a Jimmy John's, thinking about it. Thinking about Jimmy John's. Seeing a person named John, seeing a person named Jimmy.

Eating a Jimmy John's.

Eating a Jimmy John's. They have toasted sandwiches now. Let's just do doughboys. That sounds better. Let's do Jimmy Johnson.

Let's do a doughboys.

It's not an icicle. It's not an onion. I will say it's not food. It grows in the woods. It hangs in a shop. When you touch it, it cries.

Is it a rose? Because it cries your blood?

Your blood. Your blood.

Yeah, is it a plant?

Oh, interesting. No, it's not a plant. Saying it grows in the woods is a little bit, like, intentionally misleading. Paper. Paper's close, Erin, in that you're thinking of the right, like, it grows in the woods, like paper technically grows in the woods, you know?

Mushrooms. Grows in the woods, hangs in a window.

It's not a living thing, but it's made from a living thing, I would say.

You said it hangs in a window or hangs in a shop?

Hangs in a shop. Like it's for sale. And I believe that you would like hang it for display.

I don't know. Do you have another hint?

When you touch it, it cries. Think that like, do you feel? Uh, that we were, like, talking about earlier. Who is that? It's, uh, not a bad guy.

Clapton, right? It's not Jethro Tull, is it? No, no, no. It's definitely not Clapton.

It's not Clapton?

Peter Frampton. Peter Frampton.

Is it a guitar?

It's not a guitar, Erin, but that's- guitar's so close. Guitar's as close as you'll- as you've ever been to the answer.

It's a violin!

I do want to see a scene. Hold on. No, no, no.

It's late in the evening.

Adal, you are going to be playing the owner of a violin shop. Erin, you're coming in to like, you want to buy a violin, but Adal, you don't let Erin touch the violins. You just tell her how each one would sound by like mimicking the violin, but you will not let customers touch your violins.

Welcome in. Bienvenue. This is Victor's Violins. Please peruse, peruse.

Amazing. I've heard incredible things. I am actually with the Seattle Orchestra and I am actually looking for a Stradivari. I'm looking to invest in one of the best you've got. So do you have a backroom with some of your nicer... You cannot afford a Stradivari.

Looking at you, looking at how you're dressed, looking at your face.

I've got about $100,000 saved up, so I feel ready to go.

Oh, my apologies for grabbing you by the shoulders. You can't afford a Stradivari.

Let me just... Could I try this one? No, no, no!

Slap!

You slapped yourself so hard across the face. Because I cannot bear to watch disgusting little fingers touch these beautiful mechanisms. Please, point to one that you would like to... you are interested in buying.

Please. Point for Victor. Which one?

This one, please.

This one. Here's... close your eyes. I'm going to put my arm in your hand.

This one is out of tune. Do not buy this violin. This violin is shit. It is out of tune. It sounds awful.

It sounds awful.

I show you this one so that the next one you realize what a real violin should sound like. Please point to another one. Please point.

Uh, this one.

Okay, rude to point, please just gesture. Close your eyes. Close your eyes. Okay? And I'll put a cat in your arm so you have the weight and feel of the violin.

And this one sounds like... This cat is not alive. Oh.

No, that is the violin. That cat is a stuffed taxidermied cat. And that is the sound the violin makes. I was making that.

It's sort of a... You know, everyone always says that you're the best and that you have a really unconventional method. What if I, you just tell me which violin you think would work best for me. Of these, of this row.

Turn around, turn around, turn around.

Okay.

Okay, lift up the painting behind the counter.

22 to the left, 14 to the right, 38 to the left. Ah, I forgot the combination. Do you have it written down somewhere or is it a birthday?

I wrote it down and I ate it. And I thought that would be dramatic.

It's them. They're like sitting reading a magazine waiting for him to pass it.

You know what? I have one. I have one behind the counter here. Let me. This here is a Mattavarius. Not a Stratavarius. Mattavarius. 1932 Philadelphia. Oak body. Single frame. Cat gut string. Close your eyes.

All right. I'll take it. Cuts to her in the orchestra. She's playing a dead cat. I think those two are going to make it.

Adal, you are so good at selling that violin. Thank you, thank you. I really wanted to buy it. I was like, I don't know anything about violins, but I'm like, okay, it's from Philadelphia, it's from the 30s.

Must be something. Stradivarius? Is that... Stradivarius? Stradivarius?

I don't know how to pronounce it. That's a real thing though. Stradivari? Stradivari?

Yeah.

Someone will know.

Sounds like a good violin, though. The best violin. Do you guys know, is there a difference between a violin and a fiddle?

I don't think so, right?

How you hold it?

How many bagels can you eat on an empty stomach?

One, and then your stomach's not empty. And then your stomach has bagels in it.

Oh, classic. Yes, that is a classic.

And five.

Four. And Eric can eat five. All right, well, Eric can eat more than you, Adal. Kind of showed you up, big dog.

I think he was counting down to his answer, which is 50.

Would you believe that Gemma and I were on the front of the Wall Street Journal for We're buying a large portion of Jenny's bagel ice cream.

Really? This wasn't recent, right? This was a while ago?

This was like four years ago, five years ago. Do you still have the newspaper? We never bought a physical copy, but someone sent us a picture.

Did you have like a grandparent send you that? That feels like something a grandparent would do.

I think Gemma's mom sent us a picture or something.

I don't know. That is like a great, uh, yeah. And also a great indicator of like your legacy. Like that's the kind of whimsy, like you're not on the cover of newspapers robbing banks. You're like, I discovered bagel ice cream and I'm eating it so much. It's newsworthy. That's awesome. The level of whimsy of that is awesome.

When you said Wall Street Journal and bought a large... I was like, oh, he bought stock in Ginny's Ice Cream before the Ginny's Ice Cream boom. That's awesome. But no, you just bought a large stock of Ginny's Ice Cream and presumably ate it.

Wall Street Journal was like, this one guy really likes it. Slow news day.

I'd actually like to see a scene. I'm going to be your editor at a big time newspaper and you guys are bringing me stories that I don't find particularly newsworthy but you keep writing about. Alright boys, get into my office quick. The news keeps going regardless of how tired we feel. And boy do we feel tired. We're all going through a divorce probably like me. You guys get it.

Uh, Ms. Tandaloni, Ms. Tandaloni, breaking. I got a story.

Yeah, what is it?

Local man getting a divorce.

Is that me?

Yes?

Johansson?

Yes?

Alright, write up 600 words I want on my desk by tomorrow. Try to get a quote from my wife. Would you?

Yes, absolutely.

Mr. Ciannillone, Mr. Ciannillone, on the way to work today, I saw a dog tied up outside of a coffee shop. Well, presumably his owners were in the coffee shop.

Is this an anecdote? Did you let the dog go? What happened next?

No, I sat there and I was imagining what I thought the dog was saying in my mind. Kind of like a running dialogue for what was going on inside the dog's mind. Thought I could write that up into an article. Maybe it's a weekly column. Dog Thoughts!

Make it a comic, and I'll take three weeks of it. It better be funny, and it also has to make me think. One panel. Go!

Mr. Tennaloney, Mr. Tennaloney.

Yes?

How about this? Yesterday, in one 24-hour period, I saw two Mitsubishi Gallants. Holy shit. Now those are the cars you don't see weekly. And I saw two in a 24-hour period, Mr. Gallant.

Get our best photographer and get to the bottom of this. This is front page news.

Mr. Tantaloni, Mr. Tantaloni, not sponsored content. What about an article? And the title? Pitch on the title alone. The last pair of shoes you'll ever buy.

Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

The last pair of shoes you'll ever need to buy.

Sounds more like an ad. Wait, what car did you say you saw two of?

Uh, Mitsubishi Galant. Mitsubishi Tandaloni. Oh, a Galant. Sorry Mr. Galant, I mean Tandaloni.

Alright, and then you saw a dog. What coffee shop was he tied out in front of?

It was a Starbucks. It could have been any Starbucks, Mr. Tandaloni.

Wait a minute. I think my ex-wife has taken to a new lover. She loves a coffee date.

Oh, we all think that.

What?

We've seen him. He's gorgeous. Sort of a Lee Pace type.

What?

But taller.

No! Zoom out from the sky. Oh no.

A Lee Pace type but taller. Wow.

Every guy's worst nightmare.

Well everybody, that's the show. We're doing it a little different this year. We're only doing 30 minutes of it. No, I'm just kidding. We do 30 minutes and we take a break. But we will see you back after these messages.

Bye.

Ugh, Adal, Erin, I am in the dumps.

Oh, why? You sad? What's going on?

No, I was trying to buy a lemon, but it turns out I was haggling with this guy trying to buy this lemon. I wanted to, you know, make my water a little more refreshing, and eventually I got home with the thing, and the guy sold me a bad car.

Oh yeah, lemons can be bad cars. Well, I didn't know that.

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Okay, let me just use it real quick. I'm going to type into yellow exterior, citrusy, lots of seeds inside. Oh, okay. Well, this is great because with CarGurus, you can compare cars side by side, check pricing, and estimate your final cost so you can navigate the dealership with confidence.

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Put the brakes on, sweetie.

Sorry.

Buy or sell your next car today with CarGurus at CarGurus.com. Go to CarGurus.com to make sure your big deal is the best deal. That's C-A-R-G-U-R-U-S.com. CarGurus.com, honk honk. Get in, everyone. Honk honk. We're going to the moon. Hey, smells like lemon.

Hmm, Adal, JPC, you may have noticed my new diamond and emerald necklace. I bought it with the money I saved using rocket money.

Whoa.

Mm-hmm. I realized I was spending like $800 a year on unwanted apps and subscriptions and then turns out I don't need to do that. Rocket Money canceled them for me.

Okay, Erin, but this, I mean, this necklace looks really expensive.

Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings.

Okay, I'm seeing a receipt addle in the trash can here. I don't think Erin wants to see this.

Grab your hand.

She spent a lot, she spent a lot on this necklace.

The app consolidates checking, savings, loans, and investments into a single dashboard to give a user a clear view of their financial picture. I've been using Rocket Money for years, way before they were ever a sponsor of Hey Riddle Riddle, and I love how clear their communication is. If there's a big spend on my card, it will let me know right away, and it will also let me know what upcoming bills I have to pay. And I'll even negotiate lower bills for you. What a dream.

And for someone like me who hemorrhages money, Rocket Money can help set budgets and goals. I get personalized insights and regular reports, and I can receive real-time alerts for large transactions, upcoming bills, refunds, and low balances.

Yeah, so I'm looking at Erin's Rocket Money right now, and she has a goal for a new diamond necklace. Erin, this is too many zeros. Erin, this is too many zeros.

It's like 18 zeros. What's wrong?

Well, let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join RocketMoney.com slash Riddle. That's RocketMoney.com slash Riddle. RocketMoney.com slash Riddle.

I have to be honest with you guys. This is not a real diamond necklace. It's a bunch of bugs I convinced to be in a diamond formation. Still cost $100,000. Pretty good.

Adal, I mean, you know this. Managing a small business is difficult, right?

Yeah, I have cat pies, which is my food truck where my cats make pies that I sell. And it can be a real headache to have a small business.

Yeah, and I seem to recall that the health inspector refused to issue it a rating because he refused to acknowledge that it was a food restaurant?

Yeah, we've had some, uh, there's been some red tape with, with, uh, the animals serving the food, but we're working on it. We're working on it.

Well, again, managing a small business can be hard. You got to juggle multiple disconnected apps to manage your business finances. You have to be anxious about taxes. You might be behind on your books. You're always chasing receipts and keeping up with client invoices. And sometimes you accidentally hire a construction company to bury one of your hosts into a big pile of sand. Completely unintentional. You meant to do something else. And that could be about any podcast co-host. And yeah, I'm trying not to make this about me. It's not like a cry for attention here, but it's just the reality of owning a small business. But, Found has eliminated the clutter by giving you one platform that handles it all. Banking, bookkeeping, invoices, and taxes. No more paying for multiple subscriptions and dealing with clunky, outdated apps. I gotta tell you, this bulldozer company, their app is trash.

Well, I know that FOUND makes it easy to regain control of your business finances so you can get back to doing what you love, which is solving riddles. And FOUND helps you find your buried co-hosts.

Yeah, I don't know if it'll exactly do that, but it does identify the tasks that create the most hassle for small businesses. Things like categorizing expenses, preparing for taxes, managing invoices, budgeting, and they build an app that does it all directly from your business checking account. So you have time to vet potential bulldozer companies before you even hire them to bury one of your co-hosts in a big pile up there. One thing that I love about Found is that it automatically tracks expenses, which means that I don't have to carve out time every week for importing expenses, you know, to go through my purchases, to make sure everything is accounted for. And again, I got purchase orders from all kinds of construction companies with all kinds of bulldozers. Found makes it easy to see which one buried my friend Erin alive in the sand.

Yep. And don't take it from us. Take it from the electromagnetic recording that we took eight feet underground of Erin saying this. Take back control of your business today. Open a Found account for free at found.com. That's F-O-U-N-D dot com. Found is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services are provided by LeadBank. Member FDIC. Join the hundreds of thousands who have already streamlined their finances with Found.

Thanks, Erin. That was her.

That was definitely her.

Yeah, she said that.

Yeah, the electromagnet. That's how you get voices from underground, is electromagnets. Look it up. We're not lying. Oh, oh, oh, JPC, hello, it's me, Father New Year.

Oh, Father New Year, what big white beard you have, and looks like, looks like maybe was like a white-rimmed red hat that has been hastily painted like a different color?

Oh, does it? That's weird. I've always worn this. Oh, oh, oh. Hey, listen, just so you know, Erin Keif is off in Bermuda with Joshua Jackson. They got married.

Oh, that's good. Good for him. Good for him bouncing back. I know he's kind of had a tumultuous time. Uh-huh. Not to say anything of what Erin's had. What about me? Hey, Santa. Hey. Oh, I'm sorry. Not Santa. Father New Year or whatever? Father New Year! Lean in here. Look. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're obviously Santa with painted clothes, but... Oh, yeah. If you want to get new clothes, why don't you just shop at Quint's?

Oh, JPC brings down my big blue New Year's bag of gifts. I love quints. I give it to all the boys and girls. You know, as a fashionista, my outerwear needs to be especially impressive. So I buy down jackets, wool coats, Italian leather outerwear to keep me warm when it's actually cold. You know, that's the kind of stuff I buy for myself and gift to people around the world.

Yeah, see, I mean, I love quints because each piece is made from premium materials by trusted factories that meet rigorous standards for craftsmanship and ethical production. Plus, by cutting out middlemen and traditional markups, quints delivers the same quality as luxury brands at a fraction of the price. But Santa, it seems like you're giving all this quints away, but no one's, no one's kind of giving quints to you. And maybe this getup that you're wearing, that's you like asking for someone to maybe You know what, Santa? I mean, not Santa. Whatever your name is, it doesn't matter. Here's what I'm going to do for you. I'm going to take off this cashmere sweater that I got at Quinn's. I absolutely love this thing. It is so warm. It is so comfortable. And Santa, or whatever, I'm going to give this to you as a New Year's gift.

Oh, now the curse is lifted and now you are Father New Year, aka Santa. Thank you. Oh, this is comfortable as heck. Thank you.

Oh, good. Honestly, I wanted this. I thought I was going to have to Tim Allen you.

Oh, and oh, my normal voice is coming back. Oh, man. Hey, my name is Roger. I'm from Oklahoma. In 1972, I fell down a chimney. I don't want to. Quince is amazing. Thank you, Quince, for turning me back into my normal self.

Wait, is my voice going to change? Oh man, I'm getting Tim Allen. Anyway, refresh your winter wardrobe with Quince. Go to quince.com slash riddle for free shipping and your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada too, that's quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash riddle, free shipping and 365-day returns, quince.com slash riddle.

Oh, and I lied. Erin is buried alive.

Okay, we're back and we have some more riddles and they've been submitted by listeners just like you. This is a, sometimes people include where they're from, but this is one submitted from Waleed from Indiana. And Waleed says that they grew up in the middle of Indiana, which is, I also grew up in the middle of Indiana, but I wonder sometimes if people Just say the middle of when they mean the middle of nowhere. Because Indiana has a lot of middle of nowhere. But the middle is Indianapolis, which is the biggest city in Indiana.

Yeah, they probably mean the middle of nowhere, right?

Not central Indiana, but middle Indiana.

Middle, middle Indiana. Yeah, you're right. I guess I grew up in central. It doesn't matter. We'll never know, and we don't need to know. Don't go looking for Waleed. And also, they might not be in Indiana anymore, because this is from like seven years ago, this email. 2019, I think. Anyway, it's an Indiana-specific joke riddle. And so it's only fair that I'm reading it to you guys, because I obviously would have inside knowledge.

Fresh Lake.

Uh-oh. Yeah, that's it. It's Larry Bird. It's like what flies to the sky in Boston. Why shouldn't you ever tell secrets in a cornfield?

Because all those ears.

They got ears of corn.

Wow, and you guys aren't even from Indiana, and you got that so fast.

Mm-hmm.

All right, well, that was a warm-up, basically, from Willie, but Willie also includes a stumper, and this is one that they wrote and they are very proud of. Sometimes it's shallow. Sometimes it's deep. For ages you'll find it led by sheep. What is it? How? Sleep. It's sleep! Did you say how, Adal?

I was just going off the first question. Sometimes it's shallow.

There's like a whole ass series of movies that if you told someone who was not born in that era of movies that they existed, they'd be like, not possible. Not possible. Not possible that they made this movie.

Erin, have you ever been in a cornfield?

I have. Kind of spooky. Have you ever done a corn maze?

Yeah.

Pretty stressful, huh? Right, boys? Am I right?

Yeah. If it's large enough.

I love a corn maze, especially if you have like nowhere. The thing about a corn maze that is nice is that like I'm never getting stuck in a corn maze because I know I could get through that corn. Like it's not like that I know where the sun is and I could get through that corn, but power through some stocks. Yeah, it's like a puzzle that like I'm having a good time in it, but if I needed to get It's better than it being walls. Yes. Or like a hedge maze or something like that. Like, I don't think I want to get through, like, bristly bushes, but I could kind of pass through corn. There's a corn maze that we do every year at this orchard that we go to in, like, the fall. And every year it's, like, themed differently and designed differently. And I really like, like, the architecture of the corn maze. Like, the, you know, the design aspect of it.

Yeah. Yeah, sometimes, like, an aerial view, it'll be a picture of something or it might just,

Yeah, like a big, one year it was a big jack-o'-lantern like head and it was like from the, it's fun to see that from the sky, you know?

Growing up with a great grandma who had a farm and sort of rented out her land to have people grow corn and soy on it. Erin, being in a cornfield at night and feeling, there's a lot of bugs in cornfields. Yeah. Feeling a bug on you, freaking out, and then running out of a cornfield is like the worst sensation in the world. Because the ground, it's not a lot of footing because it's usually kind of muddy or gross.

Well, that's how you make a Midwest superhero.

Yeah.

How else are we supposed to get Midwest Spider-Man?

Thank you. And then like running through the corn, you get cut up pretty bad.

Yikes.

Because those stalks can be kind of sharp. So I grew up around a lot of corn and it's not great.

I'll stick to my good old Massachusetts if you don't mind.

Yeah, a clam field.

A clam field, disgusting. That's so gross.

Rip one off the stalk, bite into it. Mmm, the clams are fresh this year. Yum. Salty. He shucked clams and he shucked corn.

We did one from Indiana, so it's only fair that we do one a little closer to Erin. Erin, are you familiar with Everett, Massachusetts? Well, this one's from Isabella in Everett, Massachusetts, and this comes from a riddle book that Isabella said is from 1902.

Wow, okay, old-timey.

Yeah, this riddle's a little long, but it's called Miss Fanshawe's Enigma, okay?

Perfect.

Twas whispered in heaven and muttered in hell, and echo caught taint- I'm sorry, it's a screenshot that I'm looking at, so the word is not taintly, it's faintly, but it's like, this thing is faded, so it does look like taintly, but it's not- I wanna be clear, it is not taintly.

I was gonna say, echo caught taint, that's the most beautiful prose about a taint I've ever heard.

Echo Caught Taint is like some lost fanfic, lost the TV show, right Mr. Echo?

Doesn't matter. Mr. Echo, yes it is.

I'll start again, we'll leave all this in. "'Twas whispered in heaven and muttered in hell, and Echo caught faintly the sound as it fell. On the confines of earth, "'twas permitted to rest, and the depths of the ocean its presence confessed. "'Twas seen in the lightning and heard in the thunder, "'Twill be found in the spheres when river asunder. "'Twas given to man with his earliest breath, "'Assists at his birth and attends him in death. "'Presides o'er his happiness, honor, and health, "'Is the prop of his house and the end of his wealth. "'It begins every hope, every wish it must bound, "'And though unassuming with monarchs is crowned. Without it the soldier and sailor may roam, But woe to the wretch who expels it from home! But in shade let it rest like a delicate flower, O breathe on it softly, it dies in an hour.

My first thought is God. Like, of course they're going to be like, God is everywhere and he's in every battle cry and every whispering widow, but I feel like it's the letter H. It's the letter H. It is the letter H. Incredible.

Adal, can I ask, A, have we done this before? And B, what clued you into the letter H being the answer there?

I think Riddle Riddle

Like that is a box you have to check when you're solving a riddle.

There's a lot of H's in this and I think the longer the riddle goes, because it went a long time, you're like, okay, so there have been a lot of H's in this, but that's the only thing that there are is just a lot of H's.

I do want to see a scene. Erin, you are a woman in 1905, and you live out in the countryside. You're so lonely. JPC, you're sort of a traveling salesman who knocks on the door to push your wares. And Erin, I think you're so lonely that you have this sort of really verbose, eloquent way of speaking that just kind of prattles on.

Knock, knock, knock. Knock, knock, knock. Who is it? Come in. Oh, just walk into your house.

Well, in order of the way that you... Ah, he's right this way. Come in, come in, of course. Let me bring you to the drawing room. Now, I'll tell you something. When I married my husband in 1843, he said there would be no, no space in our home for a room this ornate. That no one would ever sit in here. We'd never take company right here at the front. And I said, no, no, no, people are going to love to sit at a couch such as this in front of the fire. And it's not too formal, but it is quite lovely.

Yes, and did you do all these drawings by hand?

No, so as I was saying... Thank God, this is a child's work. These... These curtains, I actually had them brought over by ship from France.

Oh, well you're lucky.

And these drawings I did by hand.

But these drawings are the ones by hand. Yes, these look good. These are one of these Thanksgiving turkeys.

Yes, I made my hand, put my hand by hand, and then I drew around it. Did I ever tell you about sit, sit down?

We've never met. And I'd love to sit down, but of course I have to tell you about my great curtain cleaning spray that I'm selling.

Two of my twelve sons help build the railroad. Can you believe that? Two of the twelve.

Which? Which railroad, ma'am?

The one that goes west.

Ah, the Great Western Railroad. How proud you are.

You know what I think ruined this country?

Uh-oh.

All of those machines.

Yes, of course.

In the factories, little kids' hands were doing just fine before those machines. Now the quality is going down. I miss the trade.

Oh, so not the machines that built the railroad, but the machines you're talking about, like textiles.

Textiles.

Yes. So you were born before the Industrial Revolution?

Is that what I'm... Yes, I got married in 1843.

These drapes are positively filthy, but if you'd allow me to use my patented drape-cleaning spray, I can show you.

Patented? Ah, that reminds me of a story.

How?

Change the subject.

Okay.

Alright, you know, could you sit down and play me a tune at my piano? No one has played this piano since my daughter passed away 15 minutes ago. I can try.

Yikes, mikes, that's what the smell is. Smells great because it was only 15 minutes. Let me sit down here. Do you have a tune that you would like me to play? What's popular now?

Old-timey rag. The Titanic's gonna sink in 15 years time.

The Titanic's gonna sink in 15 years time.

It's going down to the bottom of the sea. Two of its best passengers are you and me. Let's die on the Titanic together, me and my best friend. You and me on the Titanic dying. I'm your best friend? It'll be the end of our lives together. Here's your ticket. Let's get on the Titanic. 30 second dance break. Before it sinks. Dance break! Can we let that go seven minutes?

Yeah, we can. For sure we can.

How haunting to have the Titanic crash and then be like, here's a vinyl record, here's a song from 15 years ago that predicts this very incident. Although that happened with a book, right? It did? Wasn't there a book from like 1820 where it was like a large ship called the Titanic sank in the middle of the ocean?

I vaguely do remember something like that. But there's also like, it's like all these like works of fiction where they're like, whoa, this predicted the future. And it's like, well, maybe it's like, it could have been like, a lucky coincidence because of all of the other books that were written that didn't predict, you know, the future. But I do think that those like historical coincidences are very fun to, to see. It's a bummer that the people who did them don't get to enjoy them because they were like, you know this guy died like a hundred years ago so he doesn't get to be like right about a week. Dine out on that for the rest of your life.

Never pay for a beer again because you protected the Titanic.

Yeah, you're like the Michael Barry of the 1800s, you know? Is that the guy? That's the big short guy, right?

He's definitely one of them. In the 1898 novella by Morgan Robertson, The Wreck of the Titan eerily foreshadowed the Titanic disaster 14 years later with its story of a giant unsinkable liner called the Titan hitting an iceberg in the North Atlantic, sinking due to lack of lifeboats.

Scary stuff.

But also, could the people who built the Titanic have been like, no, Titan. That's a pretty cool name for a boat. Let's not do it. Let's not be so on the nose with it.

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. This person who wrote the book was in charge of naming the boat.

It's that one thing where you just like, you hear a joke somewhere else and then later you tell it and you're like, that's my joke. And you're like, oh, fuck, no. That's from somebody else.

Forgot to cite my sources.

Speaking of citing your sources, this is a riddle from Jacob. Jacob writes, We silken-haired soldiers in green clothing stand, native to most but not all fertile lands. Get lost in our ranks at the right time of year. Tear us apart and we'll lend you our ears. What are we?

Corn.

Gotta be corn. It's also corn.

Stop doing corn riddles.

Two people submitted corn riddles so close together. I thought that that was just so excellent.

And this is in your desktop folder named corn?

This is called Poems, which is the real name of the folder where I used to hide my pornography because I'm like, no one's going to want to read my poems.

That's really fucking funny.

And I think earlier in the show, I don't remember which riddle it was, but I think we had a riddle from Australia. Now we have another riddle from Australia. Ooh, la-loo. I enjoyed this one. This is from Josh in Australia. Josh writes, There was a plane crash and every single person died. Who survived?

There was a plane crash and every single person died. Who survived?

Mr. Black Box? Mr. Black Box, sing me a tune. Sing me a tune of people screaming for help. Mr. Black Box. No, it's not Mr. Black Box. Erin, you said something that was no one. You said no one?

Yeah.

No, it's not no one. There are survivors. That's why it asks who survived.

Hmm. Can you read it one more time?

There was a plane crash and every single person died. Who survived? Oh, the married people. The married couples. Oh, right. Wow. As someone who's married, I love this Riddle. I'm like, hell yeah. Don't know how. Don't know how it would have worked out that the married people lived.

I do want to see a scene. Yes, please. The two of you are sitting next to each other on a plane. You don't know each other. There's some obvious issues happening with the plane to where it might drop out of the sky, and the two of you are panicking and trying to connect somehow before the plane crashes.

I know the captain's kind of putting on a brave face, but like I— Sorry?

Scene.

Important to note, Erin took an AirPod out of her ear.

Yes, important. Note to the editor.

Note to— note to— note to listener. I do love the fact that, like, the plane is— there's obviously something going down and the person's just listening to their podcast.

Yeah, like, yeah.

I cannot be bothered.

I'm not doing this whole song and dance. I'm going to be dying listening to my favorite podcast.

I've definitely had things where people are talking to me, and I take out my AirPod and I'm like, huh? And they're like, oh, sorry, I didn't see that you had headphones in. And I'm like, oh, yeah. And then I answer whatever, and I put it back in. And then they say something else, and I'm like, huh? It's like, at this point, you know I'm listening to something. Yeah.

I flew relatively recently for the holidays, and on both flights, I got to see my favorite thing, which is when you're boarding the plane, someone being like, oh, excuse me, I think you're in my seat. And someone in a row that's clearly marked 12, they're like, is this 14? And someone's like, no, you're in 12. And they're like, oh. And then they go and move to 14. And I'm like, I think it's pretty clearly marked. It's not like they do weird things where it's like, oh, you know what? The row on this plane, it goes 8, 9, 12, 14, 11, 10. But I saw it twice on both flights, and I was like, huh. I don't think it's ever happened to me that I've sat in the wrong seat on a plane. But I guess maybe people just aren't paying super close attention. Or people think it's a seat on a plane. Who cares?

I've had a few times recently where I have, I always get a window seat if possible, where I've had the window seat, this has happened two or three times in the past couple months, I have a window seat, I go onto the plane, I'm boarding group three maybe, and someone is in my seat, and they're like, quote unquote, asleep against the window, and it's like, and then I have to like, grab them.

That's when you make a rooster noise.

I'm

Come on, man. It's a full bus. You gotta move the backpack. Someone's gonna sit there. You kind of don't want to sit next to the person who's gonna do that because you're like, you're obviously not like the greatest person in the world. Do I want to share a thing? But when they're like, full bus, full plane, you're like, okay, come on. What are we doing? I've never had a person in my seat. It sucks because there are all these little confrontations that I would love to have with people, but they never happen for me. I never get to go on a plane and there's someone in my seat and I get to be like, Move it or lose it, pal.

Hey, men out there who feel that way that JPC does, you can always scratch that itch by defending something or defending someone that is happening to.

Nah.

Yeah, but if you see that like happening to a lady and someone's in her seat, be like, hey, man, you're in her seat.

What if my headphones in?

Then, yeah, then you just ignore it.

I would love it if it's like a woman who's like, excuse me, sir, you're in my seat. And they're like, I'm not in your seat. And I go, hey, man, you're in her seat. And then it's like, he's like, I'm 12. And she's like, oh, my God, I'm 15. Oh, well, uh, next time, bitch, you better get right with God. Because if you ever do sit in her seat, I'm gonna kill you. And he's like, hey man, I'm in my seat. And I'm like, sorry dude, I just have to double down. I committed to this way too hard. I didn't have all the facts, and now I really have to... I have to die on this hill, brother.

I'm so sorry.

I simply had to insert myself.

Oh, you know what I said is you guys switched bodies. So, you are in her seat because you guys switched bodies.

Sir, sir, sir.

Please, I'll go back to my seat in a second, just I have to do this because I'm so into it now.

Sir.

I switched bodies with someone else on the plane. I think I'm in the pilot's body. I got to get into the cockpit. They're like, sir, we will restrain you. I'm an air marshal. I will draw down on you, sir. And I'm like, no, I'm the pilot.

We will toss you in the luggage section, so help me God.

Okay, we have another one from Josh, still from Australia. What hard rock group has four dudes, but none of them, it says neither of them, but I do think it's none of them, plays the guitar?

Four dudes. None of them play the guitar.

Yeah.

This is a literal rock group.

Yes. I mean, it's a hard rock group with four dudes and yeah, it's four dudes, but none of them plays the guitar.

Blue band group.

No, it's not the blue green group. That's a great guess. And this is a great riddle. This is an excellent riddle, Josh.

None of them play the guitar.

None of them play the guitar.

Is this a thing of like, None of them play the guitar because they all play the guitar. Is it that kind of thing?

Yeah.

Oh, got it.

No.

No, no. No single one of them plays the guitar. There's no one playing the guitar in this hard rock group.

Genesis?

It's not Genesis.

Is this an actual band or is this like a... Do you want some hints?

I have some hints. Yeah. Do they play other instruments other than guitar? No.

So is this like a barbershop quartet?

That's such a great guess. Here's your second hint. Are they well-known? Yes, I would say especially in the United States, but yes, I think they're very well-known. Oh, the Monkees.

The Wiggles.

It's not the Monkees and Erin. It's not the Wiggles.

Because remember, this is a hard rock group.

Okay. I wouldn't call the Wiggles or the Monkees hard rock.

Yeah, yeah. I forgot hard rock.

There's another one of them, and I don't know what it means, and there's a, in parentheses, remember Josh is from Australia, in parentheses, it says round of applause if this hint actually helps. So do you want hint three?

Yeah. Yeah.

Hint three is, does Richie Rich go into the eye of one of them? And the answer is yes.

I have a needle? I have a tiger?

Hurricane.

Does Richie Rich go into the eye of one of them? Wasn't there a thing of like a rich man has as much chances going to heaven as a camel does going through the eye of a needle or something? Something like that.

That sounds super familiar, man. Give me a bread and give me a fish and you got a fucking parable on your hands.

Richie Rich goes into the eye of one of them.

How else can I help you? It's a hard rock group, but it's not a band.

Okay.

In fact, I would say that none of them are really known for being musicians.

Spinal Tap Geology. Is this getting into like a geology situation? Oh, Mount Rushmore.

It's Mount Rushmore. Wow. Yeah. Hard rock.

Boo.

Did it throw you off that I said Josh is from Australia? Because I feel like if you're from Australia, you should not know about Mount Rushmore.

Yeah, that's frankly none of your business, Australia. Mind your business. Keep your eyes on your own paper.

Mind your fucking business. I don't know about your rocks. I don't know what kind of carvings you got down there in Australia. Whittling the fucking outback. Alright, that's good enough.

So wait, real quick. Yeah, please. Did somebody working on Mount Rushmore sneak Richie Rich into one of their eyeballs?

I have no idea. It might be like deep cut lore from a Richie Rich comic. I don't know. I don't even know. I don't know nothing about Richie Rich. That's not as big in America.

All I know is that some people say that that's Casper.

That Richie Rich dies and becomes Casper. There is a fan theory out there. Alright, hey, speaking of fans, yeah, this kind of fits. Casey, do we have a new voicemail theme?

How you doing, Mike?

Are they from Australia? Okay, I was going to ask you. There is a thick accent in there. Can anyone place the accent? Because my first thought, I got it completely wrong. It's Australia. Didn't they say G'day Mate at the beginning?

It's not Australia. It's not Australia.

New Zealand.

Vermont.

Huh.

Okay.

Huh.

I have to go lay down.

Vermontian accent.

That's a Vermontian accent and that's from Dangus Angus. Thank you, Dangus Angus. If you want to submit a voicemail theme, 30 seconds or less as a WAV file to hrrpodcast at gmail.com. Casey, do we have a fucking voicemail?

Hey, clue crew. My name's Bridget. And I literally am driving home from my job right now and heard the Patreon promo for this week and you said my name, so that means I have to call you. You also said Kevin, which isn't new. That is both my father and my brother's name. What's your dad's name? Have a great time. What? I've been working all day. Love you guys. See you in Philly.

Bye.

Okay. Love you.

What's your dad's name? This is such a great question.

Couldn't have predicted what that question was going to be. Well, should we keep guessing the names of our other family members? I feel like we're doing pretty well.

Let's see, can we guess each other's dad's names? Now this is unfair because Adal's middle name is his dad's name. So I know Adal's, but Erin's dad, who I've met, never met Adal's. Do I know your dad's first name?

Yeah, I don't know if I've ever heard either of you say your dad's name. I just call him Papa or Daddy. Just call him Papa.

But you see, you were born via immaculate contemption. So your dad is God or the devil. I forget which one yours was.

Immaculate contemption. It was. Oh, I got nothing. I have nothing for what that would even be. Yeah, I don't know that I don't know that you guys would be able to pull my dad's name. And Erin, it's fucking bothering me that I don't know your dad's name. I want to say your dad's name.

It will ring a bell, I bet.

Michael? No. I'm like throwing just like any Catholic name out there.

I feel like it's fun to say in a Boston accent, like when I picture my dad's name I picture people saying it. Shoky. No.

I honestly, Erin can you say Shoky with a Boston accent? I can't do it. Shoky.

Wait hold on.

It doesn't really lend itself well to like the whole Boston accent thing. I need final answers here. Adal, Erin, you both have one guess at my dad's name. And Adal, I think you still owe Erin a guess for her dad's name.

Erin, your dad's name. And here's the thing. I've met him, delightful man, but I feel like it's always like, this is my dad. Hey, Adal, JPC, you've met my dad. I call him Mr. Keif. Is it like Anthony?

Nah.

Shit. Alright, what is it, Erin?

Your dad's name is Xanax.

Creak. Creak Coan.

My dad wouldn't have my last name because I invented my last name, but my dad's name is Larry. Larry.

Classic.

And I don't think he's a Lawrence. I think he's legit a Larry, always been a Larry. Erin, what's your dad's name?

Richard.

Richard! Fuck, that's such a classic dad name.

Richard, you always do this. Richard!

Well, hey listeners of the show, now it's time for plugs. And what's your dad's name? Feel free to... Leave your dad's name in the comments, I don't know why you would do that.

Call in, tell us your dad's name.

Call in, tell us your dad's name.

Seems like a phishing scam.

Adal, do you have anything to plug?

Yes, please check out the podcasts Hello from the Magic Tavern, as well as Gumshoes and Dragons, wherever you find podcasts. If you're looking for new podcasts to add to your listening lists this year, please check out Hello from the Magic Tavern and Gumshoes and Dragons. Erin, anything for listeners to know?

Um, you can check out my show Quality Time here in Los Angeles. It's a true variety show. It's usually the second Sunday of the month at 530 at the Lyric, but every once in a while it changes. So you can follow us on Instagram if you want to keep up. Cool. GPC, any review to read or something to plug? I don't know, bitch.

Erin, I'm thinking of a new thing where I play that sound clip every time you ask me if there's something that I have to plug. What do we think of that as a bit?

Great, the only person I have to talk to on this show now is me. Sounds good.

No, I would say listen to the Hey Riddle Riddle Patreon. Hey, it's the beginning of the year. It's the perfect time to sign up for one of our annual memberships. You can pay for a full year and I think you get like a month off when you do that. Patreon.com slash HeyRiddleRiddle. We're doing bonus episodes every week and some review crews every month. It's a lot of fun over there and some live streams that you can check out. And one more thing to plug, if you're listening to this when it comes out, you can still get tickets to our San Francisco SketchFest show. That is going to be at 4 p.m. Pacific Time at the Gateway Theater in San Francisco on Sunday the 18th. Again, Sunday the 18th, 4 p.m. San Francisco, the Gateway Theater. You can buy tickets. If you Google, Hey Riddle Riddle SketchFest, you'll find the ticket link. That's the best way to get them, and we hope to see some of you in San Francisco.

If you're going to serve some, for some... You gotta sing it live, Erin.

You gotta sing that live. If you're going to... I'm going to serve some friction? Is that what you're saying?

San Francisco. What did I say? What did you say? Hey.

That's probably, that's probably about it for me.

All right.

Should we end with like a choreographed dance?

Yes.

Okay. And five, six, seven, eight.

I feel like now I need to get a soundbite of Erin saying Jupiter and a soundbite of Adal saying Pi forever so I can just like launch those in.

Can I go then?

Can I take off and take a nap?

Hey there, bakers and pegs. If you like that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. It's another edition of Phrase the Roof. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash hey riddle riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your seven day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month. Plus you get those ad free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gum podcast.