Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum Podcast.

The new McCrispy strip is here. Dip approved by ketchup, tangy barbecue, honey, mustard, honey mustard, Sprite, McFlurry, Big Mac sauce, double dipped in buffalo and ranch, more ranch, and creamy chili McCrispy strip dip. Now at McDonald's.

Let's go at 25. Time.

What president was 25?

Erin, I wouldn't have guessed this, but when I saw it, it makes sense. Would you believe it's McKinley?

No. I wouldn't.

When I saw it, it makes sense. Oh, yeah, of course, McKinley, 25.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Did he get shot?

McKinley?

Yeah.

Did McKinley get shot?

He was assassinated in 1901. He basically served his whole fucking term.

McKinley was the one who absolutely would have lived from that bullet, and they kept him alive for like two months. It was 1901, and they had this dentist who was his family Today we're

Better that than what, Adal?

Putting cubes of steak up there.

Well, hold on. Let's not act crazy. We all went to college.

How tender is the steak?

Wait, that's insane. I didn't know that.

Hey, if this is the thing that I'm remembering, I know I listened to a podcast at one point about McKinley's presidential assassin. Yeah, oh and his assassin was also like a crazy guy who just it was it was like the um the guy who shot uh or the guy who wanted to kill Joanie Cholgosh.

That's his name. I know that from assassins.

He was he was just totally insane. He was just like he thought I think he thought like McKinley would like give him he thought that if he killed McKinley he'd be like lauded as a hero and he'd get like a job in the government but he was just like a crazy guy who didn't have a job.

in the comments.

You know, we're not there now, I don't think. Uh, bleep that. No wait, is the episode started?

Yeah, yeah.

His song in Assassin's is the choll gosh rickin' man born in the middle of Michigan. So that's how I know about that.

That sounds right.

Adal, you know how you want JPC to do a walking tour of Chicago that's complete bullshit? I want JPC to write a book about the presidents, and he's not allowed to learn anything he already doesn't know. So each page is a different president, and it's him being like, um... It's a book?

It's a kid's book? Yeah.

It's a kid's book, and it's JPC's best memory of each of the presidents.

I write a book about the presidents, I turn it into my publisher, and they're like, hey, I gotta say, man, this is 42 pages. I think you missed the presidents. And also, a book about the presidents needs to be bigger.

I think 42 would be a pretty good amount to remember. I think that's a lot.

That would be impressive.

Whoa, wait. Oh, you, okay. So I have to, part of it is I also have to list them in order. Cause I'll tell you what, I could probably get, if I really sat down to think about it, not doing any research, but thinking about it, I could get all the presidents. There's no way I would put them in the right order.

Right. But like, what would you say about James Madison?

Uh, James Madison. Uh, I, you know, definitely. A southern fop of a man, I believe. I believe they were all fops.

This is what it says on the page.

Has this episode started? Did this episode start somewhere in there? Okay, well. Casey, make sure you bleep that part where I said to f*** the president. And again, bleep this part. I think you actually do have to bleep that part, Casey. I think you can't. I think I can't say f*** the president. Unless I'm talking about the president, which I think I can say. Like, we should stop.

We're fucked no matter what. We have years and years of us saying stuff, so we're pretty fucked.

I'll just claim that I was saying precedent the whole time, and you misheard me.

Adal, do you want me to bring up JPC's haircut, or do you want to do it?

Oh, go for it.

Oh, thank you so much. JPC got a haircut.

Erin can tell I did it myself.

You did it yourself?

I did, yeah. Well, Mariah helped with the back part that I couldn't see, too.

on the show.

I hope you enjoyed it. Yeah, but even if I wear a hat in the hot sun, it's like I never feel the top. I know it must be, but I never feel the top of my head sweating. I just feel like the sides and, you know, like the part where the sweat like collects or whatever. Yeah.

Does hair absorb sweat?

Probably, right?

It seems like it should be absorbent. Yeah, because like people's hair like gets like stinky when they Hey everyone. There's some what? There are some French benefits, which is something that James Madison would very much enjoy.

Maybe.

Lordy, lordy, it's hot here in South Carolina.

All I know is there's a president, I don't even know his name, who had 81 pairs of pants. This is great for the book. And anytime this president gets brought up, they're always like, he had 81 pairs of pants.

Can I get on the book, is this a little cartoon of Adal with his finger up doing a little blurb on my book? But it's a did you know on any page because it's not about the president that I'm on because we don't know what president is.

We don't know what president is. Guys, I'm telling you, this is what I want for my birthday. I want this book on my desk by my birthday this year.

Oh, Erin, that's crazy because you were getting nothing so now from going from getting nothing to getting me writing you a book, that's quite- Writing you a book!

Just President Collection. Yeah, I'd be like, yes, of course. I mean, Jon Hamm was just on a podcast talking about how he has like 38 tuxedos. Just tuxedos. Of course he does. But I know he had mutton chops, this president, and I feel like the nation freaked out where they're like, shouldn't it be he had around 80 pairs of pants? But the fact that it's 81 specifically is like the nation was hung up on this.

I can feel it if it's like, okay, so I have 80 pairs of pants, like suit pants, and one pair of like my weekend pants. So he's like, that's 81. Like 81 is the pants for me, 80 is for them. Yeah. That's a lot of pants though.

How many shirts? I think he was also called like the Dan, like he was a Dan, like everyone's like, what a fashionista. Like we have a president who's really just like such a clothes whore.

Erin, you're... well, I was gonna say that Erin, you're probably the most clothes whorey of us, but Adal probably has way more clothes than you.

We don't need to add clothes to that. We can be honest.

You're always giving clothes jobs and... Drop the clothes. I'm the group slut!

What was your question?

Adal, you probably have more clothes than Erin, right? But you... it's not necessarily all clothes that you're wearing.

Yes, they're not in rotation, but they're strewn about my floors and my mental, the sort of approach is, I'll wear this someday, someday I'll wear this, and then I hang on to it for eight years.

Like John Hammond has tuxedos. There's no way in a year he could ever do enough things that required a tuxedo that he needed to have all of those, right?

Exactly. And here's something I want to bring up.

Please.

Guys, we got one. We got one. We got a pope.

Chicago Pope! You guys, haven't we not talked about Chicago Pope yet?

We got a Pope!

We got a Pope! We got the Pope! I so immediately started making jokes about how I used to do improv with the Pope on all my group chats.

This is funny. What do you think the chances are that this Pope is gone by the time this episode comes out? I'd say...

Hey Riddle Riddle. See, you guys all had this kind of fun weeks ago, but we're just experiencing Chicago Pope now, so this might seem... My favorite tweet, I think it was a tweet I saw, was somebody said he puts the oop in Pope. That's awesome.

Because if you don't know, for any international visitors, in the Midwest, if someone bumps into you or If you're a midwestern person and you drop something or you're trying to excuse yourself, you go, oop, oop, oop.

Sorry about that.

My favorite is the midwestern double thigh slap when you're about to leave. You're like getting ready to go.

Welp. I looked up a list of all the president's photos to try to guess who the 81 Pants was, and I was going to guess Chester A. Arthur, and then I was going to suggest we play a game where I name a president and then you guess how he looks, but guess what? You would be able to get it right away because they all look the fucking same.

Yeah.

It is crazy.

How'd you search these images?

I went to the Wikipedia list of presidents and they have all of the photos.

Do you remember when people freaked out when Barack Obama became president and he was a black guy?

Yeah. And now we're still kind of paying for it because then they really freaked out and then elected Trump.

One of the reasons why they freaked out so hard that he was a black guy is because there had only ever been white guys. And so that's why they didn't, that's why some people didn't like- Oh, is that why they freaked out? Yeah, well, yeah. Some people may have said, some people may have said other stuff, but that's why.

Like, they could have said, like, difference of opinions, and you could be like- Right, they said tan suit, and what they really meant was, I'm racist.

I'm not saying, like, I don't like Obama, I'm not saying that there's not reasons to like Obama, but when he got elected in 2008,

I get mad at him because he didn't do anything about gun control. You're mad at him because you're racist.

I'll be honest with him. I liked him in 2008. I voted for him. It was my first election. I voted for him in 2008. 2008, I was like, okay.

Okay, change hope.

Let's do this. In 2008, Obama won like 40 states or something. He won Indiana, which was crazy. Because I don't know if you know Indiana, the place I'm from. We'll be right back. Yeah, and James K. Polk, he was the president... Was Polk the one that... No, that was Martin Van Buren, I think. English was his second language. I think that's very funny, because I think he was like a Dutchman. Polk straight up has a mullet. That's a mullet.

Yeah.

So the first couple, the first handful of presidents, it's all portraits. It's all paintings.

Do we think... Right. Except Buchanan. Buchanan, I think, was shot on a digital Buchanan. Yeah, it was a DSLR.

That's where we get Canon cameras from. Exactly. You drop the view.

Wow.

So these portraits, do we think when, like, so say George Washington is posing for this beautiful portrait he has. Yeah. Do you think after the artist does one, the artist then goes like, let's do a silly one? I think so. And he grabs a new canvas and he paints a silly one.

And George Washington's like, eh.

And he goes.

Tongue out.

He paints for eight hours and then he goes, oh, your eyes were closed for that one. Let's do a new one.

Well, Franklin Pierce, you can see that his portrait, if you go and look at these portraits, obviously, listeners, you have to look at them. Franklin Pierce's portrait was redone because when he had first gotten the portrait done, he had just come back from a vacation in Destin, Florida, and he had his hair done in, like, beads and braids. And they were like, well, I don't know if that's going to be, like, I know it's your look now, you're rocking it, but is this going to be your look, like, for a long time? It turns out it wasn't. It was like a vacation thing that he kind of like...

I took a tintype photo this weekend at the Ren Faire. Got up to 108 degrees by the way, I almost died. But I didn't know in those old photographs they have this thing that like clamps the back of your neck so you don't move. And then the woman who took the photo did the thing to the back of my neck and then explained how the photo worked. So me and Zorp were sitting there like, um, ow, ow, ow, ow, can you take it, take it, take it, take it, take it, take it?

I like how you say there's a thing that clamps to the back of your neck and it's just a guy holding you still. Yeah, just a guy named Todd being like, stop moving. I think it was Chester Arthur who was the pants guy. Oh, Chester Arthur was the pants guy? Do you know what you were going to say?

Yeah, that makes sense. He's got like a weird fashion tie. He's got the only one that has like a tie that looks like maybe this guy is doing something a little different, you know? Ulysses S. Grant was the first president to be serving a little bit of cunt in his presidential appointment.

Well, let me see. What number is he?

He's 18.

So if we called him Ulysses S. Cunt, the S could be for serving.

Oh, he is for sure serving cunt.

He's the only one who did it. And then Warren G. Harding is the only one that's like, let me get my hand in here. After Ulysses S. Grant, the next president to serve Cunt was George W. Bush. George H.W. Bush was the next president to serve Cunt. I'm just kidding, he was insane. Mission accomplished. Mission accomplished.

There you go.

Okay, this I don't want to talk about it on the podcast, but this is the first time that I'm seeing the presidential portrait for President Trump for 47. I've seen the 45 one before. The 47 one looks insane. Isn't it his mugshot?

I think it might be his mugshot.

We're also watching Andor right now, which by the time this comes out is completely over. But it's fun because it's very much about the Emperor, but it's not like the Star Wars movies where the Emperor's not focused, he's just talked about throughout. But the Emperor started out as a senator before he took absolute power and became the Emperor. Donald Trump is giving the most, like, in that 47 picture, like, I will be the undying emperor in a couple of years. Like, I will shoot Mace Windu out a window. If I find out that Donald Trump shoots Samuel L. Jackson out a window, I'm like, hey, we gotta- We need to buy that portrait. I might join the rebellion. I might put the pussy hat on and be like, it's time to go to Yavin 4, everybody.

He's like, that portrait says, I'm building the Death Star right now. Yes.

It does feel like in the Star Wars universe, 90% of conversations should just be anyone at all being like, have you heard about Darth Vader? He choked a guy from two miles away.

It's Adal, it's like what you said when you were like, get like a fire hose worth of news to the face every morning. That's what they were dealing with there too. They're like, you know what, for my mental health, I cannot look at my news tablet.

Yeah, it's like it's all Vader. It's like, our reality is like, we're like, have you heard about Darth Vader? Yeah, he like, he got on like a resistance ship and he like killed everybody on the ship and like force choked the pilot and crushed him into a cube. And our reality is like, hey, do you see like Pete Hegseth sent another dick pic to like a group chat with his mom, a doctor, and like- And me? The Washington Post bureau chief or whatever.

Here's a riddle for you. Pete Hegseth sent a dick pic to his mom, a doctor, and the bureau chief, yet he only sent the picture to two people. How is this possible?

So his mom can't be a doctor and a bureau chief. I'm looking at these presidents, guys, before we get into riddles, and I am 100% sure that I could do better today than at least 35 of these guys. At least.

Yeah, I think most people, if you picked them off the street, could do better than 35 of the presidents.

Erin, I think you would be better. Thank you. To do better, you would have to be better. And I think you should run next year for president with the campaign slogan, be better.

Actually, be best. I think I gotta wait a couple years. I actually could run for president in 2028. Oh yeah, don't you have to be- I'll be old enough.

Oh, I completely thought it was a height requirement. You're getting the COVID leg surgery, right?

I am. I can't wait. It's gonna hurt so bad.

Okay, we are gonna do some riddles, but I will say, in 2027, I think we continue to do riddles or whatever this podcast is, but we also hardcore launch a campaign for Erin Keif to be president.

It's so funny because I sometimes think about my original plan when I was applying for colleges. I was like, I'm either going to go for theater or I'm going to go for politics. And if I go for politics, I'm going to go and then maybe I'll go to law school or maybe I'll become a daily show correspondent. And that was that path. But I think about that all the time and I'm like, that would have been, oof, Because when I moved to Chicago, that was my plan. I was like, I'm going to do world news, and then I'm going to go be on The Daily Show. That was my dream. And then politics kept getting darker and darker. And I'm like, um, I actually don't know if that's like, why you don't see women with microphones at Trump rallies anymore. Like, we just it's too dangerous, too scary.

I wonder what it would be like to have a president that does not respond to texts and emails.

Hey, hey, JPC, your texts, your emails.

Let's get into some warm-up riddles here.

Oh, well, let's also say that this is Hey Riddle Riddle, I'm JPC, that's Adal, and that's Erin. What? It's too late for that. Maybe the longest we've ever gone without saying what the podcast is or who we are. It's okay.

We hadn't seen each other in a minute. We're catching up.

Yeah. These are trios. We've done these before. It's going to be three things. They all have one thing in common. A candy store, a fancy hotel, and Tchaikovsky. Tchaikovsky. Tchaikovsky. Tchaikovsky.

A candy store. Tchaikovsky. A fancy hotel. Tchaikovsky.

A candy store, a fancy hotel, and Tchaikovsky.

Who's Tchaikovsky?

Tchaikovsky. Was he a composer?

He was a composer.

And these things all have something in common?

They all have bars?

They don't all have bars, but that's a very good guess. That's very much along the lines.

A fancy hotel would have a piano in the lobby. I'm assuming Tchaikovsky has a piano somewhere in his house. Does a candy store have a piano?

Piano is definitely a breadcrumb on the trail to the right answer here. So definitely think along those lines. Keys? But it's something... Oh, it's not keys. Twizzlers.

Lollipops.

They all have Twizzlers. White and black. Is there something with white and black?

No, think about a fancy hotel. Why are we saying fancy versus a regular hotel? What would a fancy hotel have that a Ramada Inn does not have?

No bedbugs.

Chandelier.

No questions asked call service.

the show.

I do want to see a scene. JPC, you are a hotel owner. You have a hotel made out of candy. Erin, you have just arrived at the hotel. You didn't know it was going to be made out of candy, and you're just sort of like taking in all the information.

Hello and welcome. A pleasure to serve. Checking in?

Hi, yes. My name is Gretel Forrest. Sorry, I'm having... No, it's okay.

Gretel Forrest? Is that two R's? I'm not finding you in this. Do you have a reservation?

Oh, it might be under my brother's name. Hansel.

Oh, yes. Forrest. Hansel Forrest with three Rs. Yes. Yes, we have you for a double occupancy, two queen beds. Is that correct?

Staying with us for... Oh, my condolences. I'm just seeing here in the file that you have been recently orphaned. You're staying with us indefinitely?

Yes. Um, yeah, sorry. I just I stumbled upon a house like this before this.

Well, there are no houses like this. This is the finest hotel in all of the land. This is actually I am the owner and proprietor of the hotel. It is a jewel. It is unique in that way.

Right. You do. Yeah. Sorry. You just remind me of someone. Sorry. My brother and I went into this house. We pushed a lady in the oven because we thought she was going to cook and eat us. Now we're scared every day she's going to enact her revenge.

You don't have to. You don't have to tell me this. And of course, everything you tell me is completely confidential. We keep all of our guests secrets, even if they admit to, as long as they're not planning on doing something like this in the future, if it's a past crime that they have admitted to it.

So I'll just grab the Wi-Fi info and breakfast starts at 6?

Breakfast starts whenever you want to take a bite. And it's candy for breakfast.

Oh, that's kind of fun.

Don't, if you're going to eat candy or eat pieces of the hotel, might I recommend you don't eat anything that is floor or walls, because that's something that people usually touch. Sealing, easy to eat and easy to replace. So if it's floor or walls, it's going to be dirty candy.

Great.

And your... Because it's all candy.

Right.

Yes.

Even the bed.

The hotel is made of candy. I'm typing on a computer right now.

Yeah, but is it made of candy?

No. Oh, okay. How would an elevator made of candy work?

Um, I don't know, like the same way a hotel made of candy would work.

Ah! I am so sick of this! Shit! That was definitely the witch.

This is the grand opening.

Grand opening, first guest. A candy store, a fancy hotel, and Tchaikovsky.

The witch's house was made of candy, but, like, she had, like, an oven and stuff and a cauldron or whatever.

It was made of candy. That was all made of candy? I don't know, bitch. Oh, Adal, what is the answer to this?

It's insane to go into someone's house, start to get suspicious, and to push them in an oven just to, like, be safe. Just in case.

Yeah, because we don't know what she was trying to cook them.

Yeah, if you told me that story and you did not mention like the fairy tale aspect of it. Yeah. You just talked about how it's like a home invasion. They push someone in the oven. I would be like, oh, this is like a person suffering from like a mental break.

Yes.

And you're like, no, they were children and the house was candy. I'm like, okay, well, the detail, I just can't with this. I can't, I can't absorb what this story is. It's got, I have too much context for this.

But she was a witch, your honor, I think. A candy store, a fancy hotel, Tchaikovsky. I think, and I very much apologize. I feel like we're going to get a lot of comments on how I'm pronouncing Tchaikovsky, but I just don't care. A fancy hotel, I think, is what we really need to examine. So, again, what does a fancy hotel have that a regular hotel has? A bar. A pool. And think about, like, the upper floors, probably.

Penthouse. Is it true? Balcony.

Penthouse, but you might call it this. Suite. Suite. Yes.

She took a lot of flack for being a witch, but, like, she wanted to eat the kids, right? She was a cannibal.

Well, hold on.

I think she expressed

JPC, she expressed interest in maybe having a nibble, if permissible.

I think she wanted them to eat the candy and then she wanted to eat them.

I forgot, Adal's trying to get on the Armie Hammer podcast, so he's trying to be as loose as he can with the term cannibal because it doesn't actually apply to people who just maybe have talked about one thing to try.

Armie, thank you so much for having me on Hammering Home. Is that the name of it? Arnie? Armie. Arnie? Armie. Arnie? Armie. Thanks for coming by. And you're the heir to the Army Hammer Fortune Company? Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Adal, can I have another riddle? Because that one kind of kicked my ass.

Yes, and just sort of a liar-liar situation, Erin, you might say. A candy store, a fancy hotel, Tchaikovsky, they all have sweets. That's sort of just to wrap that one up. Absolutely got it, Erin. Good job. This will be a football playbook, a football playbook, a love letter, and Hollywood squares.

Exes. Okay.

Louie Anderson. They all have Louie Anderson.

Dang, I'm bad at this.

Alright guys, we're gonna run a Hail Mary Louie Anderson. Top 10 receivers on the board. Erin, you got half of it. You said they all have... Exes and Os. They all have exes and Os.

I would like to see a scene. JPC, you are our football coach and you're explaining a play to us that you came up with yesterday.

Alright everybody, we're gonna try something. It's just practice today, okay? So, you know, the game's on Sunday. We practice like it's the game. I had a dream last night. And are you guys familiar with... It's like the type of dream where like you can kind of control what's happening.

Lucid Dreaming Coach.

Yeah, so I had my first, I've been trying to do it for a while, I had my first lucid dream last night. And we were all, yep, Steve you were there, Derek, we were all on the field and I was coming up with these brilliant plays and when I woke up, the second I woke up, I started writing them all down. I started writing them all down, okay?

Oh yeah, give it to us, coach. What is it? What is it?

For the first play, so it looks like the football field, but it's like not the football field. Like it's way longer. So that'll be important. So it'll be like longer, like it'll be like a hundred miles. So we'll have to like stop as we're running downfield. We'll have to like stop and like stay at like a hotels and stuff.

Coaches, this sort of sounds like this is dream logic and won't necessarily apply to the kind of plays we need to win a game.

You are O-line, okay? You're not the quarterback. QB1, you can speak in the huddles. O-line don't speak in the huddles.

But I'm the captain, coach.

Coach, thank you. QB1 here. I see on page 14, play 48, it says that I am to snap the ball and then hover three inches off the ground for about 45 minutes.

It's now 45 minutes and 45 seconds. So this is called the Serpent on the Mound. So what is this? You're gonna snap the football in half? Mound? Hand it to the Serpent on the Mound. Hand it to the people on either side of you, okay? They're gonna take those footballs, snap them in half. Now suddenly we have eight footballs on the field. My math works out there. Everybody's gonna be throwing footballs, okay? Little footballs. It's sort of a wildcat situation.

Uh, coach, on page seven, this diagram says All my teeth are supposed to fall out, and then I have to take an English test again that I failed when I was in high school?

Don't worry about it. Don't dwell on too much about the teeth and the test. The teeth fall out, but shark teeth replace them. Shark never run out of teeth. They're just always pushing, pushing, pushing, growing back, growing more teeth, growing more teeth, growing more teeth. And the English test is on Huck Finn, so it's easy. You know, pain to the fence or whatever.

I'm supposed to get back with Debra, but she's a car now.

And it says that happened in your childhood best friend's kitchen.

So this one sucks because I had just seen the movie Cars for the first time, so Lightning McQueen was gonna be in a ton of these plays, but that's okay, okay? Here's one called Wow. So, Lightning McQueen, you start driving down the field, and it's long, like a hundred miles, so you're gonna have to stop for gas, okay?

Hey coach, we need to start the game. Sorry, me and the other refs, we gotta start the game.

Oh my God, have I been talking for a whole day?

Yeah. Oh, we were doing... Hey, it's me, your mom, the ref, your mom. Okay. But I'm made of gold.

What's going on with you? And we all start floating up to the ceiling. Wee! Scene. It was a dream the whole time. Inception. It was a dream, then a dream, a scene within a scene. Inception.

A ladder, a mountain, a fish.

Things that you climb. Things that you do high.

Erin, things that you climb is so close. Just maybe another word for this. Oh, things that you wrung out. Uh, no, but I like that as well. Ew! You ever wring out a fish, you catch it in the ocean, you twist it, get all the water out?

You don't eat the bones of a fish. If you want that meat, you gotta wring out the bones.

Let's go on a break.

We'll be right back.

Can't believe that worked.

All right, just hop on the stools there, and welcome to the grand opening of Rifai's Diner. What can I get you to? Look over the menu. What can I get you? What can I get you?

Okay, this looks like the same stuff that Tempo Chef is offering.

Oh, yeah.

It feels like you're sort of going to use one of their meals.

Yeah, duh. I mean, Tempo has the best sort of delivery-at-home food that you can buy, so why would I cook food on my own? That sounds insane. Buying ingredients?

Just misleading when you name it your name, so just keep going though.

Yeah, I feel like if you had invited us over to have Tempo, we would have absolutely come over because we like Tempo.

Way faster. Yeah. Okay. So good.

Plus, Tempo is the official partner of the 2025 CrossFit Games. They deliver fresh, chef-crafted, dietician-approved meals right to your door. They're packed with protein. The delicious meals help keep you fueled and ready for your next workout.

Yeah, I mean that's the thing is like I could go in the back and like pretend to cook or something, but Tempo serves up fast, feel-good, single-serving meals that are crafted to cook in just three minutes so you can eat well without sacrificing taste or convenience, because otherwise it's going to be like eight hours for eggs.

Oh wow, that's crazy. We could be back next week with new recipes each week that are made with real ingredients and nutrient-rich. They make it easy to keep up a healthy lifestyle. They can just be heated up in the microwave in just three minutes. Easy peasy.

Okay, here's some of my favorites. Ding ding, order up Moroccan-style spicy meatball and brown rice bowl with peas and Here's what's next!

Yeah, so you're eating all of them. So for a limited time, Tempo is offering our listeners 60% off your first box. Go to Tempomeals.com slash Riddle. That's Tempomeals.com slash Riddle for 60% off your first box. Tempomeals.com slash Riddle. Rules and restrictions may apply.

Alright, diner's closed. Go home.

What? Notice anything different about me? Gestures towards my new quince dress that's perfect for summer. Don't say appearance.

Don't say appearance. Don't say appearance. It looks like you are very sleepy. I'm Erin, did you get your legs switched? I heard people are doing that surgery now where they get right and left shuffled.

I did. It went kind of wrong. But I do have this beautiful new dress from Quince. Quince has all the things you actually want to wear this summer, like organic cotton silk polos, European linen beach shorts, and comfortable pants that work from everything from backyard hangs to nice dinners. But the best part? is everything with Quince is half the cost of a similar brand.

That's true.

It has really unlocked something for me, you guys. I'm loving this. It's perfect for basics. It's perfect for home stuff. Check it out.

Erin, it's gorgeous. And a little birdie told me, that took your hair I believe, a little birdie with your hair told me that Quince works directly with top artisans and they cut out the middleman. Quince gives you luxury pieces without the markups.

Yeah, I love my Quince lightweight hoodies. I actually have a really terrible time finding lightweight hoodies. It's one of my favorite articles of clothing, and the ones that I got from Quince are fantastic. So stick to the staples that last with elevated essentials from Quince. Go to quince.com slash riddle for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's quince, Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash riddle to get free shipping and 365 day returns, quince.com slash riddle.

Does a spin in my dress, my new legs sort of fall and turn into dust. I knew I shouldn't have gotten this surgery.

This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace.

Adal JPC, we're going on tour this year and I thought I'd do something special to commemorate. I'm doing a travel blog. I'm using Squarespace to make my brand new website to sort of show all the photos and videos and funny stories of our travels.

I'm looking at this, Erin, this looks like a blog of places that you've fallen down.

Yeah. Sorry, I just... This is also just for like insurance stuff. Like I have to keep track.

ErinWipesOut.gov?

Yeah, okay, so you sort of turned this around on me.

Bird pulls out woman's hair. Well, Erin, the good thing is Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online with your travel blog or whatever it might be. Whether you're starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. Except, Erin, I don't know, are you getting paid for this?

Not yet, but I can fundraise directly on the website to grow my impact with built-in donation tools. I can create a professional on-brand website that makes it easy to accept one-time or recurring contributions and engage supporters. With built-in email campaigns and marketing tools, you can connect with your community and inspire more people to support your cause. Because I'm trying to find a wig because a bird ate all my hair.

And Erin, also with Squarespace, you have, you know, access to videos. Squarespace makes it easy to showcase your expertise and engage clients with video content on your website. You can upload and organize your videos, create stunning video libraries, and even monetize your content by adding a paywall. Perfect for online courses, exclusive tutorials, and premium workshops. Like I'm seeing this video on your website, um, bird wears women's hair and pulls off look better. Ooh, it's paywalled! Erin, very smart!

Ah!

What's this one? Kids Trip Adult Woman While Onlookers Cheer?

What? Erin, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upload that one.

Erin, plus with SEO tools, you can get discovered fast with integrated Squarespace SEO tools. Every website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions and auto-generated sitemap and more. So you show up more often on search engines and bring in more of your ideal customers. Let me try it out. I'm going to Google woman, bird, wig, and pain.

Erin, here you are! Top of the list!

Also, Kristen Wiig is going to play a bird in an upcoming Alfred Hitchcock remake. Wow! Sign me up. So head to squarespace.com slash riddle for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use offer code riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain that includes birds with Erin's hair.

I think I'm going to shut this website down. It's too funny.

Okay, we're back and we still have this to solve. A ladder, a mountain, a fish. These three things have something in common. Erin, their climb is very, very close.

The thing that goes up, swims up is...

You might do this to a ladder. You might do this to a mountain. You might do this if you're cooking a fish. Hmm. Brine. You would brine a ladder. Fillet. I mean, this is one of the first things you do to a fish. Steal. Absolute first things you do. Kill. Well, maybe after killing. Hopefully. Debone. Oh, very close. But even before you get to the bones, you gotta do something else.

Scale!

These are all things you scale.

Get their guts out. I do want to see a scene.

Sure. JPC, Erin and I are interviewers. You are the first fish to climb Everest and we're getting the press conference. Over here.

Oh my God.

Hi, from the London Observer, but I don't have an accent. What was the hardest part about climbing the mountain?

Horrible. It's fucking freezing. Are you kidding? Oh my God. Oh God.

Dwayne DeJure, Epoch Times, or Epic Times, I don't really know. I have a question. Did you think that there would be more salmon up there? Yeah. And is that why you went? Okay. Yeah. Follow-up question, why?

Because something's broken in my... Sorry, I'm so cold. I need... We're at base camp.

Yeah. We're back down the mountain at this point.

I know, but like, ugh. I mean, that's why I stayed so fresh is I was so cold up there. Holy crap.

Can we do something? Can we help you warm up? Would it help if we dunked you in some hot oil? Tea?

Oil? I see what's happening. No, you can't cook me, okay? I climbed up the mountain because I thought my whole school was going up there. Turns out that was not the case. I'm feeling a little off. I don't know where they are. I'm supposed to be with them. It's actually, I'm out like $150,000. It's expensive to climb Mount Everest. Also, there's a long line at the top and that was super stressful.

Hi, Todd McFarlane, creator of Spawn. I had a question. You have a little bite out of you. Yeah. What happened there?

Okay. All right. Don't judge. I got a little lost. I got sort of, what is it called when you feel sick from not enough air? Altitude sickness. I got altitude sickness. I got a little hungry. The sun came out. It's kind of beating down on me. I smelled how I smelled. The sweat had made me salty. Reach down, took a bite.

Speaking of sweat made me salty, I'm sorry, Jerry Curl, Playboy Magazine. America wants to know, while you were up there, did you breed?

Did you spawn? Well, if you do go up there and you do see a bunch of dead baby salmon... You know, I don't need to answer this question. Did I lay eggs up there? Fine. Sure.

Let's do one more of these. Let's go on a break. We'll be right back. Let's do one more of these. This is eggs, bricks, and carpets. Eggs, bricks, carpets, and I'll even add Erin Keif.

These are all things that need to be whisked away. Erin, you just won a vacation. Eggs, bricks, and carpets. Erin, when's the last time that you were whisked away?

I don't think ever.

Wow.

What constitutes being whisked away?

Usually, you're sort of like whisked off your feet. The expression I read most often is, I was whisked off my feet, so... I think... Kidnapped?

Well, no, I don't think... I think it, like, what it would need is you, like, leave your place. Like, you walk out your front door, and someone is standing, leaning against a car. It doesn't have to be a convertible. It would help. With a jacket thrown over one shoulder, and they're... They're probably either wearing sunglasses, or they have sunglasses, but they're definitely holding tickets. Like they have tickets to something. And they're just smiling. And then you look at them, and without seeing what the tickets are, you know what the tickets are for.

And In Your Eyes is playing on their car speakers. Yes. Yeah.

Wait a minute.

What now? Is that the like? Inside your eyes. Wait, now my brain is combining those songs. Stop it, Adal, stop! Inside your eyes.

It's inside of your eyes.

Yeah, I think whisked away is like if someone is like, grab your passport, baby, we're going to Paris this weekend, and I have it all figured out. No, I've not been whisked away. I'm the one who usually plans the trips in my life. I'm the one who books things and finds things. But I would love to be whisked away.

I had one birthday where the night before I went to bed, Gemma was like, pack a bag. Here's everything you need. And it was like, wow, 10 items or something. So I packed it. She's like, pack a bag for one day. Here's the things you definitely should put in your bag. And then we walked to the L line, and then we got on the L line, we got to O'Hare, and then she was kind of smiling and was like, where are we going to go? And I was like, are we going to… Chili's, too. I was trying to guess. We just went to Chili's, too. She was like, pack a set of utensils, cutlery. But we ended up going to New Orleans for the day, and it was such a delight to be like, I'm at the airport, I don't know where I'm going. It was

A guy on vacation, his wife's so excited and he's doing the hand signs to people to see if anyone would be like, excuse me sir, do you want to go to New Orleans today? Do you want to go to New Orleans today? Did you want to watch football?

Eggs, bricks, and carpets all have something in common. Think about eggs... Fibers. They all have fibers. Think about what are done to eggs before we can enjoy them. Cracked. Even before they're cracked.

They're shoved out of a bird's cloaca.

100%.

JBC, you nailed it, but what's that term called? Being born. Hatched. Yeah, but we don't say born. We don't say my chicken born.

Laid. Oh, they're laid.

These are all things that are laid. Eggs, bricks, carpets. I'd like to see a seed.

Adal and JPC, you guys are chickens. Adal, JPC is your chicken best friend, and you are kind of panicking and confiding in him that you laid a brick instead of an egg last night.

Oh, wait, wait. Before... You know, I just gotta... I have to, like, organize this, because it's, you know... I am having a ton of sex.

Okay.

It's so late. It's just like, I'm going through all of this shit, and I just can't find the fucking... You know, it's like... Because I have, like, I could do like- Covered in cum. I could be like, oh yeah, but that's not the right one.

Or I could be like- Casey, unrelated- But that's not, like, I have- Why do you never use Adal's? I have a mother who listens.

Adal never says- Adal, okay. I mean, I guess, like, Adal could be like, I have sex- Pounded smooth. And so, but, you know, it's just like- Play one of yours, smart guy. Ugh, mine are nothing. Casey, can you- Oh! I was bitten by a cloaca.

Okay, that one would have- Oh!

Okay.

Yeah. That's the only one that applied. That's the only one that made sense. Casey, can you help me set up a soundboard this week?

Yeah, yeah.

I'm sorry. I'm so- and you know I hate to ask you, but- I bugged a frog.

I bugged a frog in Tennessee. GBC, will you make that whole thing a clip? Close. Yeah. Casey, will you set up my soundboard this week?

Um, okay, I'd like to see my scene now.

Okay, can you restate what it was? Because obviously I was- Wow.

We're chickens. Obviously I was looking for- We're chickens. You're chicken best friends. Adal is confiding in you because he laid a brick last night instead of an egg and he's panicking.

Got it. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Hey Bob. Hey Bob. Hey Bob.

Hey Suze, what's going on?

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Hey, last night, uh, you know, I, um, I did the thing we all look forward to doing and, uh, went a little sideways. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.

Uh, okay, I'm not following you.

I laid a brick. I laid a brick. Big brick.

Oh, you were playing basketball last night?

I didn't hear you. Yeah, well, yeah.

I was playing, uh... Yeah, I guess I missed the invite. Was it just chickens or were roosters...? It doesn't matter.

It was an N1 mixtape tour. Um, the professor was there.

Got it. Oh, you laid a brick. Well, that sucks. I mean... Yeah, if it was the N1 Mixtape Tour, probably a lot of people saw it, too. Well, hey, you know what? People don't remember that stuff after it happens. It might be like in a video or whatever, but... It happens to everybody, you know?

But after the game, I got so nervous, I thought I'd, you know, sort of give birth, and I... Okay, I pushed out a brick. So I laid bricks, and then I pushed out a brick.

I'm sorry, wait. Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You... You pushed a brick out of your body?

Uh-huh.

Like instead of an egg.

Like you laid it for it. Hold it. Touch it.

Oh my god. This is like a standard sized brick. Right? This came out of you. This is as big as you. It's thicker than you. It's heavier than you. There's no way this came out of you.

I tried to put it back in. I even laid next to it. And I'm like, the corners would stick out of my mouth.

I see what's happening. I see what's happening. You tried to... You tried to put it back in. Okay. Yeah. Hey. Y'all get lonely. You know?

Seed, seed, seed. I forgot that I could pull the ripcord on that. Good.

She's a brick and I'm chicken sex toy. That is what that song is about and it's actually really sad. No, Erin, Ben Folds came out and said it's about a chicken masturbating with a brick. I think it's pretty obvious when you listen to the lyrics, Erin.

If you hear the lyrics about him like sitting in the waiting room and like getting nervous, it's like about a chicken.

No, that's what the luckiest is about. You guys don't listen to him.

That's, Erin, that's the cluckiest. It's about a chicken.

Because I am the cluckiest. I don't get many things right the first time.

I'm clucking the suburbs.

I am told that a lot. Well, that's all about the in-house.

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Handfolds 5? Handfolds 5. There are disables involved.

Guys, remember a few episodes ago we said that we might do an episode where it takes us two years because we're putting so much time and effort and production value into it. We even said we hire a Rick Rubin type to bring us to his Shangri-La minimalist studio and give us zen-like wisdom. What if we do in two years we release a Ben Folds album that's Hen Folds 5 and it's all Weird Al-esque parodies, but it's all chicken stuff.

And after we do that, we promise we'll disappear forever. You will never hear from us again.

I think, Adal, if we did that, I think that people would be genuinely pretty upset. I think that people would be pretty upset.

In a good way?

No.

Oh, interesting. Upset in a good way. Huh.

And what, and what, and what was that? There's an old man who lived to his 90s and one day passed away in his sleep. And his wife, she stayed for a couple of days, passed away. Is that on an album? I thought that was like a non-album binfold song.

I'm sorry, I don't know what I should say.

From the Over the Hedge soundtrack? Is that from Over the Hedge? What's his song that he wrote for his daughter? I remember being so sweet. I don't want to turn it into a chicken song. Is it off the suburbs?

Rocking the suburbs?

It's called Gracie. How does that go though?

Well, I don't know, Erin, you're gonna have to listen to it and you're gonna have to work for two years on a Ben Folds chicken album and then put it out and then have people be like, hey man, what's going on?

Are you okay?

What is this? I'll start a Kickstarter and we'll see how many people are clamoring for a Ben Folds chicken parody album.

Annie Waits turns into... People start stealing from the Kickstarter, that's how much they don't want it to exist.

Carrie and Kathy, we'll figure it out. Hey, we'll figure this out. We'll figure it out. What type of transportation has 10 wheels but can only carry one person?

What type of transportation has 10 wheels but can only carry one person? Unicycle stacked up on a bunch of other unicycles with one guy at the top of it.

Okay.

10 unicycle cycle cycle.

Okay, DVC, you can leave the class. Thank you. You've passed. Erin? What type of transportation has ten wheels but can only carry one person?

A bike.

It's not a bike. Bikes usually have one or two wheels.

Is this a... okay. It's got ten wheels. You said ten wheels?

Ten wheels.

So is this like a, like a person, I'm gonna say like in a European city, like a Parisianer, who is taking, like transporting eight wheels of cheese home from their like cheese shop on a bike?

Uh, GPC, you got it!

Ah, Ratatouille! There's two wheels, plus eight wheels of fromage! Can you believe that there is not a single character in the movie Ratatouille named Ratatouille? What the fuck?

That's insane. What the fuck? There's also no character in Toy Story named Toy Story. What are we doing?

Why is the mouse not named Ratatouille?

In Rugrats they have names like Tommy. There's no Rugrat in Rugrats.

It really sucks. I mean, we gotta do something about these fucking Hollywood types.

Yeah, I'm tired of it. With their naming conventions for movies. I'm tired of it. What transportation has ten wheels? I already got it! But can only carry one person besides a French person carrying wheels of chills. So think of these wheels being smaller than what you're probably picturing.

So there's also wheels is like a type of like, it's like macaroni for kids. Like, it's like, hey, it's wheels. It's like a fun shape of a noodle. And how does it sound? What?

Oh, cool. Oh, yeah, cool. Oh, crap. The cheesiest Velveeta cheese. Macaroni wheels. Annie's. Annie's luxury mac and cheese.

And let's go on a break.

Let's go to a mental break. What type of transportation has 10 wheels? Here's what I'll say.

I was in the grocery store the other day and I was walking down the mac and cheese aisle. Not really my thing but it's on the way to the beans. And I saw there were like three new brands of mac and cheese that I've never fucking heard of. Was anybody clamoring for this? Did anyone need more like additional mac and cheese brands on the market?

Erin, is this stand-up or what is this?

Yeah, I think it's really pre-planned.

Who are the people who are asking for more mac and cheese? Wait, I feel like people are clamoring for more mac and cheese. Really? Yeah, because Kraft is Craft is nostalgia-based. You eat it and you're like, this reminds me of childhood. But it is fairly watery, and the cheese is thin, and it's not super tasty. Annie's is fine, but it tastes like you're eating healthy mac and cheese. I feel like we need a third option that's a little more luscious and dense.

I got news for you. We got a third option, a fourth option, and a fifth option. They got the brands. The mac and cheese is there for you.

Yeah, I feel like it's popular enough of a food staple that we need more options.

Isn't it crazy that we say food staple, but if you try to eat staples, the doctor will tell you, these have cut up your insides.

Not a universal experience. Just you.

Just you. Yeah, I can afford a doctor, okay? Sorry, Erin. Sorry that I have health insurance, okay? And then I go to the doctor because I ate too many staples. Because I read it in a book about staples and I said, oh, it seems like rice and staples are two things that people can eat.

Keep a healthy- To kind of what?

Huh?

Huh?

Was I talking or who was- I think, I don't remember.

Is it a clock? Can't ride a clock though.

You could ride a clock. You'd get some weird looks. This type of transportation with 10 wheels is usually going to be seen, for us, we would most likely see it a lot during like the summer. I truly could not have told you that roller skates had five wheels on them. I think most inline skates do, right?

Oh, inline skates is in a line, right? Because the roller skates are like four wheels, right?

Roller skates are four and four, yeah, in total. But roller blades, or the inline skates, I think typically have five and five.

Why do they have five? Why not four? Is it just because it has to be longer than your foot or something? Hey, you can tell, I've never skated once in my life on skates. I've skateboarded, but I've never, I've never, I think I've put on roller skates maybe twice, but I've never had inline skates.

I've never done inline. I used to go to roller, like, roller rinks all the time for birthday parties, for, I mean, roller rinks were the place to be. You don't see them a lot anymore, I don't think.

There's one sort of by me in Los Angeles that I went to, but I don't know. It's fun to watch people who are good at it, but I don't know. I don't necessarily have the most fun doing it.

It's fun when they turn on, they'll put like a disco ball down that maybe they'll put on blacklight or something. You go to this little window and a guy sells you a box of Alexander the Grapes for a dollar.

Yeah.

You're having fun. You get some nachos. It's a good time.

To me, when I see people going fast on, like, rollerblades, it's the same as, like, when I see a person on a motorcycle. I'm like, oh, I mean, like, you're dead. Like, you're gonna die. It shows, like, a level of trust in the society that we live in that I'm like, hey, have you seen the society that we live in? Like, you're gonna get killed. And someone's gonna kill you and not even think twice about, like, they're gonna kill you on their phone. Can you imagine, like, taking someone's life and you're just, like, scrolling? You're like, that's the...

Anyway, I always said that motorcycles is the number one thing I will not budge on in dating. Other than like being a bad person, but like in terms of other stuff, I will never date someone who rides motorcycles.

Would you get on a motorcycle?

No, never.

In any context? No. Yeah, there's like, I don't think, I can't think, maybe if I'm like taking a picture, if there's like a motorcycle, like those like things you put quarters in outside of a grocery store, maybe I'll get on that and go like, I'm riding a horse motorcycle.

And people who don't wear helmets drive me insane, yeah.

What about guys... Just in general. What about guys on mopeds? Pops wheelie, falls off, moped falls on me, I'm fine.

All right, back to the hospital. They know us already because of JPC and all those staples. Yeah, the hospital knows us. I have a family member who's a speech pathologist for traumatic brain injury, or was for a really long time, and getting on a motorcycle is so stupid. People who, like, there's enough chaos in this world. When you are past 25 and you are inviting chaos in on the daily, what are you doing? Stop. Stop it.

They're courting something. They're courting something that we can't possibly understand.

Alright, well.

I blame the movies.

Yeah. The Great Escape, what's the movie he looks so cool on a motorcycle?

Steve McQueen. Terminator 2 has a big motorcycle scene. What are like the big motorcycle movies? What's the one Beyond the Pines or something? Wild Hogs. Wild Hogs with Martin Lawrence and Tim Allen, I believe. What else? What are the cool motorcycle movies?

I feel like there's like cool motorcycle scenes in movies, but I don't know if there's like a lot of cool motorcycle movies. Torque, I guess, they tried to do Motorcycle Fast and the Furious. Adam Scott was the bad guy in it.

What's the one, there's one with, who played, Joseph Gordon-Levitt played like a bike delivery guy. Riddle Riddle. There's a fruit bowl on Grandma's table containing two types of fruit. If you jumble the letters of one, you can spell the other. What are the two fruits?

Apple and papple, baby.

Apple and papple. Banana and bananas.

Banana and bananas.

Pear.

There's a fruit bowl on Grandma's table containing two types of fruit. If you jumble the letters of one, you can spell the other. What are the two fruits? Peach.

Watermelon. Grape. Uh, Erin? Watermelon.

Hey, again, Mark Zuckerberg, drop the water.

Melon. Lemon and melon.

Lemon and melon.

What? She has a fruit bowl on her table that has lemon and melon in it? Yeah, I want to see a scene.

She can't live alone anymore.

No, I'm sorry Grandma, it's time. And there's no shame in it, it's just you can't take care of yourself because you're making lemon melon salad.

I like, uh, would you like a little melon? He's like, no. Um, I do want to see a scene, the two of you are, I can't think of anything except for there's a Wallace Shawn play called Aunt Dan and Lemon. So you two, um, are going to be two, uh, like octogenarian women sitting on a park bench and your names are Melon and Lemon. And you're just sort of like people watching and sort of taking in the day in your own weird way.

So where's this crow that you think looks like your dead husband?

Yeah, well, he'll be here. He's not always here. This is just kind of his area. Hey, you're bogarting the Dr. Pepper Slurpee. Well... Give me some. Give me some Dr. Pepper Slurpee.

My teeth are in there. That's dibs.

Oh, I thought you were cleaning them. Well... Dr. Pepper is caustic, so it will clean dentures.

Yeah, and it will make your mouth taste good when you put them back in.

Okay, so when we see the crow, he looks just like my dead husband. Be cool. I will take first pass if he's not into it.

What do we mean, be cool? I thought you were just trying to show me that this crow sort of had the essence of your husband. What do you mean, be cool?

No, he's nothing like him. He just looks a lot like him.

Are we here to hit on a crow?

I'm not here to hit on anything. Coffee's for closers. Dr. Pepper's Slurpees are for closers. I'm here to seal the deal with that crow. And you can back up. You can play clean up. You are always the looker, Mellon. You can play clean up if I can't get the job done. I'm just saying that.

You want to try to make a pass at this crow, and if it doesn't work, you want me to hit on it?

Yoda said there is no try, okay?

That was a scene from the new play, Glen Mellon, Glen Lemon.

Dr. Pepper's Proposers. I know a play.

Well, that is our episode. Thank you to all the presidents we mentioned.

Yeah, thanks.

Thank you to Henfolds 5, very excited for this album. Thanks to all our sponsors too. And to all our sponsors. Erin, do you have anything to plug or promote?

The only thing I want to say is that I looked up the lyrics to Gracie and it's going to work really well for our Henfolds 5 because the first lyric is, you can't fool me, I saw you when you came out. So it's him singing a song about an egg.

That's right.

That's great. That's what I have to plug and I'm doing okay. Adal, what do you have to plug?

I want to plug our Patreon. Check out our Patreon. Patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle, I believe. The whole shebang. Also, we have a 10-city tour coming up. So excited for that. We'll probably sing some of the Henfoldt's five songs there, just a little sneak preview.

Little update for the tour, Chicago and Twin City shows coming up at the end of this month. The Twin City show is dangerously close to selling out. I can't say one way or the other that we'll add another show if that one does sell out, but that's not a possibility. But do get your tickets if you're holding out for that Twin City show, get your tickets soon because they are there. We're very close to selling out. And then later in the month, Portland, Seattle, and L.A., also all of those shows kind of getting close to selling out, so I would get your tickets soon. But the L.A. show is live-streamed, so you can see that from anywhere, and I will say that that is not close to selling out. It's actually possible. I think the only way we could sell out of the live-stream show is if everyone in the world bought a ticket. Then if we sold more than that, I'd say, something's fishy. Something fishy is going on here. Let's get an IT person to check that. And then, what are we, Denver, Philly, DC, Boston, New York City, all later in the year and all still have tickets available.

Yeah, Denver, take your time. GBC, do you have anything to plug or promote?

No, I think that's pretty much it.

Hell yeah.

Jupiter. Yep. Not gonna make anybody work really hard.

Amen. Thank you, Erin.

Are there any parents in the music?

Hey there, Ransom and Echoes. If you liked that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. We are back to the works of Danielle Steele. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com. Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your seven day free trial with a review crew for $8 a month. Plus get those ad free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gun podcast. You set the gold standard for your business. Your website should do the same. Wix puts you at the helm so you can enjoy the creative freedom of designing your site just the way you want. Want someone to bounce your ideas off? Talk with AI to create a beautiful site together. Whatever your business, manage it from one place and tie it all together with a personalized domain name. Gear up for success with a brand that says you best. You can do it yourself on Wix.