Which Riddle Riddle?

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Hey, it's Hey Riddle Riddle, Adal, Erin, JPZ, et cetera. Sorry, usually we do some sort of scene or some sort of fun thing up top, but today we have a pressing issue, which is- Erin, you mentioned that you had a question about a cookie, so I want to make sure we clear enough of a landing strip for you to be able to land that plane.

Okay, this is so jarring to have an episode start like this. We were going to do a really kooky crazy scene at the beginning.

Erin, don't say kooky. You're just going to think that you're talking about your kooky crazy scene.

Well, I actually can't even take credit for this question. Let me lay it out for you. And unfortunately, I'm mentioning another podcast host in this that is more interesting to listen to than us. I was at a Halloween party with Beth May, who is one of the brightest stars in the podcasting world. Very talented person.

Don't say she's a host.

What?

Why are we splitting hairs? It's Beth May. It's Beth May. It's Beth May.

Yeah, if someone was like, Beth May, she's a host. I'd be like, what does Beth May host?

Okay. Well.

I think they have a spin-off podcast where they talk about Christian movies. Maybe she hosts that.

Emailing Beth May right now to see if she will guest host Hey Riddle Riddle. And she said yes. She didn't respond. I didn't send that email. I don't want to make fake promises.

Anyways.

Immediately backpedaling off of that.

First of all, she was dressed up as Madame Web at this party and she was walking around with a Pepsi can. Already dream scenario. I feel like I want an essay contest, okay?

Madame Web at the end of the movie? Smug Madame Web? Because Madame Web doesn't have a constitute, right?

Madame Web. Madame Web.

She has that red leather coat.

And at the end of the movie she suddenly has glasses. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

She posed the question, like this is a hypothetical, of like what would you do? Hypothetically, so I'm not taking credit for this question, but I'm really into it. You meet the love of your life. Checks every box. Everything's perfect, right?

Oh, I see where this is going. You want to know if it's okay to fuck Cookie Monster?

Okay, what if I already did? I'm asking if it's okay if I fall in love with Cookie Monster after a lot of really great sex. That's my question. Is it okay? It's the kind of sex that you're gonna fall in love with them. Okay? I don't know what else to say. He says me want cookie. It's actually everything I'm about to say but I do want to make a joke about you know how he is eating and this is all bleep. He's eating

All mouth, no throat.

Yeah, that's what it's like to have sex with a cookie monster. Thank you so much for believing all of that. What was I saying? Now I'm thinking about having sex.

Oh, I'm so sorry. You said a hypothetical question that Bethany posed.

Yes.

Can we get away from this segment before one of us says, me want nookie.

No, it's too late.

I think I got it.

You ran right into it.

I think I got it under the wire.

So the question is, meet the love of your life, everything's perfect. But every time they get stressed out, they turn into a cookie. Anytime they're under any sort of stress, they turn into a cookie. Now this is an interesting question because people, depending on what type of person they date, had very different answers. I think that this is an interesting question. What do you guys think? Would that be a deal breaker for you if they turned into a cookie every time they got stressed out?

I thought the question was going to continue in terms of would you snack on them, or I thought it was going to go in a direction of- Can you fucking kill your partner at all?

No. Well, wait, is it going to kill them if they take one bite? If I take one bite, will they come back with a bite of the person?

Without a shoulder, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the problem with a cookie is you don't know where it ends and begins, right? If you take a bite of any edge, that could be the top of their head or the bottom of their feet, right?

Yeah, but I feel like you guys are really focusing on the eating them part, and I feel like- But they're a cookie!

They're a cookie, Erin. So maybe if you nibble all the way around the edge, would that make them like an inch shorter? That's a really... Erin, this is actually a really great question. I can text her.

What if a crumb falls off? Just because like sometimes cookies like crumb. Like what if just like a crumb falls off?

That's not... That's fine.

That's fine. That's fine. That's like dandruff.

Yeah, it's like dandruff. Okay.

Dandruff isn't fine, by the way. It's actually a really serious issue that affects millions of men just like people in your life that you might know. Like you. No!

At JPC, I do appreciate that you said, I think what you're going for is that when Cookie Monster orgasms, he says, I think I'm gonna crumb. Which I think is appropriate.

I'm crumbing!

And we're weeping all of this, I assume. Casey, please. Oh, Casey is dead. No. Okay, wait. Hold on.

Cookie Monster always taps me on the shoulder if he's going to crumb into my mouth.

Somebody made a good point of what if you're about to give birth and your partner's driving you to the hospital and then you look over and there's a cookie in the driver's seat.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Erin, can I ask a question? Yeah. How long do they stay a cookie?

Until they calm down.

But cookies can't be stressed.

No, that's why. But like, okay, let's say they're a cookie for 40 minutes. Every time they get stressed.

40 minutes?! Yeah. Well, here's the problem though. I don't think if I know a person who is like feeling a lot of stress, I don't think it's ever helpful for the stress that you feel to be turned into a cookie for 40 minutes. So do they come out of that experience feeling absolutely no stress or do they come out of that experience just a stress but now they've wasted 40 minutes being a cookie?

No, the stress is gone from their body.

Probably, because like, let's say your partner's like, I got a really important meeting in 30 minutes, I'm really stressed for it. Now they're 10 minutes late for the meeting and they're like, easy breezy, man.

It really puts things into perspective to be a cookie, doesn't it?

So here's a follow-up question.

Yep.

So say I take my partner, who turns into a cookie when stressed, I take them to see ... What was the Safdie Brothers movie with Adam Sandler? With the jewels?

Uncut Gems.

Uncut Gems. Thank you. Uncut Gems. I take my partner to go see Uncut Gems. Within 10 minutes of that movie, stress turns into a cookie. After 40 minutes, it turns back into my partner. Do they immediately see 50 minutes into Uncut Gems and turn into a cookie again? Is there any amount of reset? Yeah, it's rolling. Okay, it's rolling.

Okay. Some people were like, that actually sounds like a peaceful thing for my partner. This was my first question. What kind of cookie? What kind of cookie? No. My first question is, can the cookie hear me? Because I'm in an argument with my partner and they've hurt my feelings.

Oh, you're going to lay into them for 40 minutes being like, you're going to listen to everything I've got to say, cookie.

No, but sometimes if someone's hurt someone's feelings, that is a moment of stress. And if you turn into a cookie and you never have to hear about how I feel just because you get stressed out by it, then that's not good in the long term.

No, and I think most situations it's going to make a really healthy, productive relationship if a person turns into a cookie every 40 minutes. I would do it. I would meet this love of my life, they'd turn into a cookie, the first time they felt stressed that I'd eat the cookie, and that would be that. I'm not going to jail for eating a cookie. I just got a free cookie, basically.

Oh, if you eat the cookie, after 40 minutes in your stomach, does it turn back into body parts?

Yeah.

Okay, so they'd catch you.

You're going to jail.

I tend to, when I'm stressed, I tend to stress eat. So I think I would say no, because this would be a bad pairing. Because I assume we'd be in a lot of situations, if we're in this together for the long haul, I would assume a lot of situations where they're stressed, I would also be stressed. It would be a joint stressed effort. And I stress eat, so again, I think that's just a bad combo.

What would happen if I took the cookie and fed it to a bunch of birds? Would the birds all fly away and then like 40 minutes later just burst with body parts?

What is interesting about this question is when you're talking about it happening to my partner, my partner turning into a cookie every time they get stressed, then I'm like, that feels a little hard. That would be a hard life. But if you're giving me the option that I turn into a cookie for 40 minutes every time I get stressed, sign me up yesterday. I'm a cookie. Let's fucking go.

Do you think you could probably get disability, right? That's got to be a disability.

For turning into a cookie, 100p.

Yeah, I mean it would have to be like medically like tested or whatever like they'd have to be like recognized.

No, I don't want doctors to know about this. I don't want them poking and prodding at me and eating me and stuff leaving me for Santa.

Taking chips off of your chocolate.

Yeah.

But honestly, Erin, if all you want is crumbs, it sounds like there's a loophole where they turn it into a cookie, you just shake that son of a bitch, get as many crumbs as you can onto a piece of paper, eat those, put those in your mouth. Sure, they turn into dandruff in your stomach 40 minutes later, but who cares? At that point, you already had all those delicious cookie crumbs, and your partner is none the wiser. And yes, we're recording this before the election. Shut the fuck up.

Everyone's doing what they can to get through this week before the election. I saw a TikTok that made me laugh so hard of a guy being like, it has been Halloween in the week before an election for three years. I'm so tired of wearing a costume and feeling the existential dread of like pre-election time. And I'm like, oh my God.

Pre-election can still get you pregnant. Let's get into some riddles here. I have something new. These are called Thrimes. Thrimes are going to be three questions with three answers, and those three answers will all rhyme with one another. Do you guys remember when Thrimes was married to Threelock Rusk? I remember Busta Thrimes. Here's how these are going to go.

Okay, I'm ready.

I got Erin and me with that. That's some of your finest work. I'm not even kidding. Oh, fuck. Fuck. All right.

So here's how these will go. I'll read the three questions or the three clues, I guess they are. Clues. And then don't try and answer each one in real time. Wait till I read all three and then you're going to give me all three answers because I think that's more fun than solving one at a time. Sure. Of course, if you're stuck, obviously solve one at a time and go from there, and once you get one, you'll be able to help- But this is kind of like only connect, right?

And each one of these is going to lead to something that rhymes three times, right?

Yes, but there's no overall- There's no overall, whatever. There's not like a meta puzzle or anything. Got it, got it, got it. It's just three answers that rhyme. Okay, so for example, to baffle

To rub with the nose, and to restrain from biting, to baffle, to rub with the nose, to restrain from biting, would be puzzle, nuzzle, muzzle.

Puzzle, nuzzle, muzzle.

Okay, gotcha.

Puzzle, nuzzle, muzzle, of course.

Puzzle means to baffle, nuzzle means to rub with the nose, and muzzle is to restrain from biting. Okay. Got it? Yeah, got it. Okay. Here we go. This is... Wow, I see you just ripping through these. Are some of these bad? Are some of these filthy? Some of these are a little nasty. To pawn, to punch, to converse. Talk. Clock. To pawn, to punch, to converse.

So it would be clock, second, talk, to pawn, hawk.

Hawk, clock, talk?

Clock, talk.

You have two of them correct.

Wait, oh, okay. Then I'll wait.

Hawk, hawk, and no, hawk and talk, no. Hawk, clock, no. Which ones do we have right?

Which ones are right?

Hawk, toa, and talk, toa. So to punch is the middle one. Yeah. I think you're saying clock like socks to socks. Yes.

I'd like to I'd like to pose a question.

Sock and clock also rhyme. So clock works.

But to punch if I were to say to punch I don't think clock would be the obvious. Like that's not a go to right.

If you clock someone or you sock someone, I mean, all of these are antiquated terms.

Oh, I see. You're still saying ... I see what you're saying. Yeah. I thought you were saying to clock in, like to punch your time card. Oh! But you're saying to clock someone. Yeah, you're totally right. Is that where that comes from? Clocking in? That is an expression.

Punch in the time card? What the fuck?

I'd like to pose a question.

Yes.

What were the three words again? Talk. Hawk.

Hawk. H-O-C-K, like to hawk. Yeah. It's just for listeners. So, sock and talk.

All right, which one of us is Hawk, which one of us is Sock, and which one of us is Talk?

I think JBC is Hawk. Okay. Adal strikes me as Sock. He's cozy.

Yeah, cozy. And I'm Talk?

Yeah.

Oh, okay. Interesting.

Hawkity, Sockity, Talk. The mouse, the clock.

Here we go. Here's the next one. And this is one of the harder ones, so maybe... Oh, let's do it now. We got this. Mix and Chris. Chris spelled K-R-I-S-S. One, mix, and Chris. Is a Chris a knife? Possibly, but in this situation it is not. K-R-I-S-S. Okay. So let me help you out a little bit. If you have one of something, you would say you have a ... Thingle. Yes. Now mix and Chris.

Mingle.

Yes.

Single mingle shingle.

Kringle. Kringle. Yes. Kris Kringle. Single mingle kringle. I do want to see a scene. Okay.

Okay. I think I already know what this is going to be. I don't even think I need to hear him say what the scene is. I think I know what the scene is. Do you ever feel like that, Erin? Like you know what it's going to be?

The only question is, do we want to see Erin as Santa or JPC as Uncle Santa?

Well, neither. Oh, sorry. Is that not an option?

We'll see. JPC is regular Santa, and you are at a speed dating event. Erin, you and I will play all the people he speed dates for as long as we see this. And Erin, we'll have you be the first date.

Hi, I'm Ellie. It's so nice to meet you.

Ho, ho, ho. Nice to meet you, Elliot. I am Santa. What? Ho, ho, ho. Nice to meet you, Elliot. I'm Santa.

I'm Ellie. And did you, what did you call me?

Ellie? I called you Elliot. I thought you said Elliot.

I said Ellie.

Oh. Women can be Elliots now.

Ding!

Ho, ho, ho. I'm Santa. Nice to meet you.

Hi, I'm Veronica. I like to write. I like to go to the theater. What are your hobbies?

Veronica, hold, give me one second. Okay, naughty, we're in play. Excuse me? I'm sorry? What was that list you just pulled up? Oh, just consulting. You know, a list. Just a list. People are allowed to have lists.

Ding!

Ho ho ho, I'm Santa. Nice to meet you.

Hi, I'm Heather. It's so nice to meet you.

First time at one of these things, I should say.

Oh yeah, same. I'm so proud of us for getting out there. Good for us. What are you writing? Also, are you drinking milk?

It's a white Russian. No, it's milk. Would you like a sip? I have cookies here as well. These are for the table.

Has anyone seen my wife? Has anyone seen my wife? She got stressed. Why is your wife at a singles event? She said she got stressed and she was gonna leave.

Ah, well. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Nothing to be done about that.

Ding! Hi.

Ho, ho, ho. I'm Santa. Nice to meet you.

Uh, Veronica again. Um, I was just curious.

Oh, good. Round two.

That list you had that said I was naughty. Does it go into further detail? Like does it say kinks?

Yeah, not on the list. Hold on. If I get on my phone and I open up the tab and I click the hyperlink on Veronica naughty. Oh, arson. Uh, not really the kind of naughty that I was looking for. Ding! Ho ho ho, I'm Santa. Nice to meet you.

Hi, Heather again.

Um, sorry, I just- Oh, there's like three people at this fucking thing.

I just thought people were looping back around to you and it made you sort of feel like a hot commodity to me. I wanted to come back over and- Who are the other guys?

Santa's striking out.

Look to your left and right, it's like- Who? Say it. Mr. Bunny. Who?

Hi, I'm Inspector Calhoun. Have you seen this woman? Veronica Williams. We're looking for her. She's wanted for burning down three factories.

Yeah, she was right there, man. Oh.

Can I grab her? Do I have to wait for the ding?

No, you don't have to wait for the ding, but if you want to wait for my ding, I'll be in the restroom in about five minutes.

We're shutting down the whole event. We're shutting down the event.

Oh, come on, come on. I want my $7 back. Then I want my $7. Is that smoke?

I want my $7 back.

I do like Santa screaming, people could have lists.

I'm not really sure how prevalent speed dating is as a thing. Do you guys know that you've ever known someone that has done a speed dating thing? I know that it exists in the context of a movie or something like that.

There's one today in Los Angeles.

Okay, that makes sense.

There's a TV show called Love on the Spectrum. There's an Australian version and a US version. I think both versions have done speed dating, so I feel like it is a thing for sure.

I do feel for the people out there who are dating and engaged in it because it does seem like an awful prospect of meeting people organically in the world just because of the world that we live in that is so online and that's where connections happen. It does seem very much a bummer. But, you know, if you gotta go speed dating, go for it, man. I think there's probably some people there that are interested in dating, so.

You know, there's a bar that I go to sometimes. I've been there a couple times for different birthday parties that have a speed dating event that's coming up. Should I go?

Erin showing up at the bar being like, happy birthday, Melissa! Guess I'm the first one here. Oh, speed dating.

Oh, weird.

What is it? Sp-ed-i-a-ting. Sp-ed-i-a-ting. Sp-ed-i-a-ting.

Oh, that's a curious couple of words together. I'll try it.

I'll try this. I don't see a reason.

Takes off shirt, sits in bra, orders a milk.

Oh, so we're saying that Santa wears a shirt, no shirt, and a bra. Of course. It's off season, baby.

Now Erin, would you be willing for, say, a review crew in the future, when we're all in L.A. maybe, or you're in Chicago, we do a review crew where we review speed dating, but it's you speed dating, and then JPC and I sit on either side of you for the whole process, and you just say, like, these are my dads, or these are my uncles or something.

You guys, that would be so funny and so vulnerable. You would see me at my absolute worst, which is me on a date.

I would love to do that because the speed dating people would be like, obviously you're not allowed to have two men sit with you. I'm like, oh, so you have a problem with two gay men having an adult daughter. You're disgusting. You're filth.

You guys were getting kicked out so fast and then demanding our $7 back. This was a free event.

$7 each. Disgusting. A 35-year-old gay man can't have a 33-year-old daughter? Disgusting.

Disgusting. And I'm 36 now, probably, at the time. I will be at the time. Because a 35-year-old man should not have a 33-year-old daughter. Yeah, that would be weird. Yeah, that's really weird. Here's your three clues. Unless... Erin, can I adopt you?

Yeah, oh my God. Do you think we could?

God forbid anything happens to your parents. And Jimmy, if you're listening, do not say a word to them about this. God forbid. Yeah, it could be with whoever you end up with, Jimmy, the offer stands. I'll walk you down the aisle, man.

That's so funny. God forbid, Erin.

He would be honored by that. When we're adults, people get up there in age.

Parents do eventually- So you're saying if something happened to my parents- I will die.

In this assumption- I'll go through the process.

I'll do the work. So you think my parents are going to walk Jimmy down the aisle as it stands right now?

Right now, as it stands, your parents will give Jimmy to Molly.

Can I tell you guys, this is something earnest, but I would say if anything were to happen to people in my family, I would have maybe one of you guys or both of you walk me down the aisle. Wow. And that's a sweet thing to say, and I know this podcast is about being garbage and treating each other like garbage, but it would mean a lot to me.

Erin, can we wear a fun costume? It would mean a lot to me as well.

Yeah. Yeah. You can wear a fun costume. Yay.

It would mean a lot to us, Erin, for two cookie monsters to walk you down the aisle.

So then you're walking me down the aisle as a cookie monster? Two cookie monsters walking me to a cookie monster? What am I, horny heaven?

Yeah.

Me want tissue. Me want tissue for my daughter's wedding. We know why you want the tissue, Cookie Monster. Get out of here.

Get out of here, you pervert.

Pervert. I'm going to go nookie in the bathroom. I'm going to go crumb in that tissue.

I'm going to go crumb. GPC, are you working on my dowry? The last time we checked, you guys were going to write a dowry for me.

Yeah, I'm breeding the goats right now. So right now I've got two goats.

I don't want to know. I don't want to know.

Erin, they're going at it. But I don't think, just so everyone's clear, I don't think that these goats are going to be able to get pregnant by each other. I'm trying my best to help the goats along by kind of encouraging them with my hand and lightly. On top of their ... But nothing that I'm doing right now is getting them to that point.

Come.

I wanted to see if I could get one through.

Oh, Erin, I just got word you're fired from SNL.

Yeah, that's fine. They're pre-firing me.

Pre-firing because somebody's fired?

At this point we're just like gobbling turkeys.

You certainly are.

You are.

You are.

Come! Just echoes across the canyon, that is this podcast. Come, come, come, come.

Okay Adal, more of these please.

I just want to quickly say, it's better, Erin, for your parents to give Jimmy to Molly than for your parents to give Molly to Jimmy. Because if Jimmy took Molly, the wedding is ruined. He's on his back staring at the ceiling.

Oh my god, I really do hope they get married. I'm scared they won't. They will. They will.

You say you're scared they won't?

Yeah, I would make me really sad if they didn't end up getting married.

Well, you know what? If they're not right for each other, I hope they don't get married. I hope that they only get married under ideal circumstances. Jimmy, if you're listening to this, this has to be one of the weirdest ways to experience this podcast.

I hope to fucking God that they're on a long road trip right now and they can't turn it off. This is so awkward.

Yeah, something's stuck. Jimmy keeps hitting fast forward 30 seconds and we're still talking.

Or he's like, should we stop and get gas or something? Or do you want to put on a song? I'm going to fall asleep if we don't hear music.

We start talking about Erin's parents dying and Jimmy marrying Molly. They're on a long road trip. He hits 30 seconds four times. He just hears Erin go, come.

They're clawing at the car door handles being like, get us out. They want to roll out of a moving car.

Pan out to see that your mom and dad are in the backseat of the car on the road trip.

Okay. We have to move on.

Yeah. Here's your three clues.

From what and to what? Guys, what is this?

From what to who?

To why? I'm sorry. Keep going, Adal. I'm sorry.

From Justin to Kelly, here's your three clues. Talkative, grouchy, lacking firmness. These all sound like Sesame Street characters as well.

Mean. A limp, a simp, and a wimp.

You're all three.

Those are great. That's not what I have here, but I do like those three. Talkative, grouchy, lacking firmness.

What's lacking firmness? Soft? What does soft rhyme with though?

So it's not soft, it's a longer word, and I'll say... Oh, it's a longer word and it means lacking firmness. Yeah, let me go with... Authente. Let me go with the first clue here. So talkative, the word you're looking for is like... Verbose. That's a good one. That's not what I have here. Gabby. That is correct. Oh wait, Gabby? And then grouchy and lacking firmness. Crabby and flabby? Yes.

Lacking firmness.

I'm flabby and you're both crabby. Crabby, crabby, and flabby.

I'm looking at my waveform and there's no way that I'm not Gabby.

I think I'm screamy. I'm looking at my waveform and I think I'm very loud. That is such a vulnerable moment when you're recording a podcast and you look at your waveform and you're like, uh-oh, there's been a lot of me in the last 15 minutes. Maybe pull back.

Here's your next thrime. The whole family, naked and unrefined.

The whole family, naked and unrefined.

I think naked's probably the easiest, then unrefined. Bear? No. The whole family, naked and unrefined. And I think the whole family, I think the answer to this one is a David Cronenberg movie. The Birds? That's Hitchcock.

Okay, fuck.

The whole family, naked and unrefined. Again, naked I think is the easiest. So what are some words for naked? Someone said bear, which is a great guess, but not this one.

Unclothed.

Yeah, I was going to say unclothed, but that's just like an un, you know.

It's not that. It's a one syllable word. This is a type of beach.

Oh, nude.

Yes.

Nude, crude for unrefined.

Yes. And then the whole family.

Slide in the family stone?

Yes, the answer is Sly and the Family Stone, Nude and Crude. Brood. It is Brood, Nude, Crude.

Okay, okay, yeah. Nude was the easiest one to get. You are correct about that.

I do want to see a scene. With who? Did you say with who or woo-hoo?

Both.

Erin's just looking at the cast, just hoping she sees her name on it.

Okay, looking at the ... Where's my name? Where's my name? Where's my name? Where's my name? Dead body number three? Dang.

I do want to say seeing the two of you are at a nude beach separately. You run into each other and you happen to be like old friends from high school and you haven't seen each other in quite some time.

Gotcha.

Morning. Morning. Oh.

Oh my.

Mr. Anderson? Teacher on the beach!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I had to, I had to.

That's a Hallmark movie.

Teacher on the beach! Teacher on the beach!

A small town girl meets her teacher on a nude beach.

I was like, if you saw your old teacher at a strip club while you were there, that's embarrassing, but you're not the one naked. If it's actually you... But I guess if you're the type of person who's gonna go to a nude beach, which I don't think I would ever do, you've gotta be the type of person who's just very comfortable being naked, right?

Yeah. I feel like it's more embarrassing to see a teacher... If I ran into a former teacher at an Aldi's, that's more embarrassing to me. For them to see what's in my shopping cart... We're back.

talk about a little bit of grocery cart anxiety. I don't really like being perceived in general.

And that would happen a good amount in Chicago that I would run into people grocery shopping because I lived in a neighborhood with a bunch of improvisers and I always felt a little judged by like the lack of nutritious value that was in my cart. It was like never produce. It was like little sad Sad cans of whipped cream.

I'm looking at my cart and I'm like, apples is definitely on the list.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are the apples? Are they in this aisle? The candy aisle? I thought they were here.

Those are apple candy. I guess I could kind of refine this later to get the apples out if I get a couple bags of apple candy.

If I soak these in water, they become apples.

I don't think there's apples. Those are mini Snickers. I don't think they have apples in them. It's like, well, apple's a component. Everything's atoms.

And Adam and Evie. Everything's Adams. That's a great excuse. When you're starting to say, well, everything's Adams, you're really up a creek without a paddle. You've lost the plot of your argument.

That is a dead body. A dead body and a live body have the same number of Adams. I mean, there's no chemical difference.

It's all Adams. Yeah. Cookie Monster puppet went missing and it's in a bed with me, but we're all Adams at the end of the day.

Let's do one more here before break.

On a cosmic scale, I didn't fuck Cookie Monster.

On a cosmic scale. Wait, really quick before the break. Can I just say, can we leave this episode up for like six days and then delete it? Because I really would love to work with the Henson Company one day. I have a pitch, Erin. Is there a property that you never want to work with? Probably Hey Riddle Riddle. Well, yeah. No, no, no. I love it here.

What about the Power Rangers? You never want to do the Power Rangers, right? No? Okay. Well, fuck. Adal, do you have any properties that you want to work with?

Fuck you, Power Rangers. Fuck you.

Okay. Erin, can we just get you clean saying Pink Ranger?

Pink Ranger.

Great. Casey, just go ahead and whenever Erin or any of us said Cookie Monster in this episode, just go ahead and edit her saying Pink Ranger in and then we're good, right?

Pink Ranger.

Yeah, we'll get a couple different takes. So yeah, when the Pink Ranger orgasms, she says, I'm going to crumb. OK, so yeah, this all still works. It works.

It tracks.

Now, can we make merch with a Pink Ranger with a word bubble that says, I'm going to crumb? Does that appeal to- We're all Adams, man.

We're all Adams.

Does that appeal to anyone?

It'll be up for six minutes.

It will break tea public. People will be ordering so many. In today's news, Pink Ranger shirt saying, I'm going to crumb has broken the internet.

Oh, heaven. All right.

This is heaven. One more? One more. One more before break. Here we go. A type of necklace, a fireplace tool, a playing card. Choker, poker. Joker. Wow. Wow. Got that so fast. Let's take a break and we'll be right back with more Hey Riddle Riddle.

More Hey Riddle Riddle.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey Adal, hey Erin, I got a bone to pick with the two of you.

Of course you do.

Okay, let's go ahead.

You two, sometimes you two do... Erin, he does not have a bone. No, no, no.

I do have a... You don't have a bone. Oh my God, this is so embarrassing, JPC.

I have a bone to pick with myself. I just haven't really been my best lately and I guess I just don't know what to do.

BetterHelp? Have you heard of BetterHelp, JBC? BetterHelp!

BetterHelp! It's online therapy designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to my schedule! BetterHelp!

I know, and it's sometimes hard to remind ourselves that we're trying to make our best to make sense of everything in this crazy world, but it's not easy, JPC. Sometimes you wake up and you don't have a bone to pick when you want to, you know?

Yeah.

All you have to do, JPC, with BetterHelp is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. I've been using BetterHelp, and guess what, JPC? What? It helps a lot. It could help you.

I mean, I do like online therapy. I do like being able to, you know, email my therapist when I have a conflict or be able to stay at home while I'm doing my therapies. I don't have to like drive all the way to an office and get into a big confrontation with a guy in the parking lot, which is why I don't go to that parking lot anymore.

Oh yeah, you've had 10 to 12 bone to picks in the parking lot, right? You can't go back to that parking lot?

Maybe that's why I have to go back, to get my bone to picks back. And I know we're doing an ad for something, and we keep saying it's going to help you get your bone to picks back, and I don't want you to read it too much.

But you get it. In the context of JPC, you understand who JPC is as a person, that that is connected to his mojo and his sense of self.

Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Riddle. This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace. Oh, hey guys, thank you for showing up to the party, but you two were the only people that showed up, so we have to cancel. Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah, we can't do a four square party with three people. It doesn't work, and I don't have a ball, and I don't have any chalk.

Yeah. Well, we could sort of put out a signal, boost this, maybe make a website or something to see if there's anybody in the area who wants to play Foursquare. Have you heard of, speaking of Foursquare, have you heard of Squarespace? Squarespace.

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You got it, buddy.

Yeah, you knew that surprisingly well.

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Okay, I'm making a website right now. It's called FoursquareRandoFinder.com. And basically, it just helps you find a fourth for Foursquare.

Yeah, I wouldn't do rando. Actually, with Squarespace, you can connect to your social and multimedia accounts so that it's maybe people you know at least somewhat, if not close friends. Connect major social and multimedia accounts to your website in a few clicks as icons, direct links, or embedded feeds. Build visitor trust while updating content only where you need it, extending your brand's footprint.

Okay, I just set up a new spage.

Spage? Oh, of a square page.

Okay, I just set up a new page, a Square page on JPC, hold on, I called it foursquarerandofinder.com and it's for donations. You can raise funds for the cause you love with a website that makes accepting donations and managing donors easy. Set up giving pages easily and start accepting donations online right away. Access donor contact information and donation history in a central dashboard and then send fundraising emails directly through Squarespace. Right now we're raising money for people who don't have any chalk and who don't have any balls.

Amazing.

Yeah, it's really meaningful. Head to Squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, Squarespace.com slash Riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Guys, I found a fourth! I found a fourth! He's actually going to be here right now!

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My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big ROAS man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laugh at me to this day.

Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com slash results to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com slash results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn, the place to be, to be. Hey Riddle Riddle.

Happy birthday to Erin.

Oh my gosh.

Happy birthday to Erin. Hold on.

You guys, this is embarrassing because it's actually someone else's birthday and they're here and now you're singing to me whose birthday is later this week and when you should be singing to them.

Who are you singing to? Whose birthday is it? Get out from behind that curtain. What are you, Polonius? Who is this guy? Hey, come here. It's Andy! Hello. I'm old. I'm so old. He's old. He's so old. Oh, he's in Mrs. Doubtfire makeup. Yep. Hello. Hello. I'm doing a drive-by fruiting.

Sandy's got his own home life thing going on, so we're not going to pry too deep into why he's in the Mrs. Doubtfire outfit.

I'm dangerously close to crossing the Wilford Brimley line. I'll just tell you that. Wow. Those are the two neighbors that hate each other. Sandy, or should I say Mrs. Sandfire? Wilfred and Brimley. Yeah. Oh, the two old Muppets, right.

Do you have... It wasn't half bad, it was all bad.

Do you have, for your birthday, do you have any gifts for us? Ooh, gifts, gifts, gifts. Presents! Yeah, presents! Did you bring any puzzles for me, is the question. Yeah, I might have something for you guys. Since it's my birthday, I actually do like as a hobby or as a tradition on my birthday to give out puzzles to my friends and I consider you guys my friends. So let's see if that's sustained after this segment.

I have a question for you. It seems like the more we learn about your life, the more puzzles are just like a huge part of your life. Have you ever tried to eat a puzzle?

Sure. I've had puzzles made out of chocolate. There was a puzzle at the MIT Mystery Hunt once. Okay. So there was a puzzle about the number two, like number two pencils, and you solved it. And often in the MIT Mystery Hunt, Most of the time you call in an answer and it's done. But sometimes you call in an answer and the response you get is, come to HQ and pick up a thing to continue this puzzle. You get a physical object. So for this puzzle, it said, okay, come to HQ and pick up a thing. So we went there, we came back, and it was, remember, the theme of the puzzle was the number two. It was a full baby diaper. It was a baby diaper that was full of what seemed like poop.

Now, can I ask you? Yeah. When you say, what seemed like poop, what sense did you have that it was poop? Was it a smell-based sense?

I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I ate it. The original question is, we opened it up and inside was poop and inside the poop was some more pieces of puzzle and people started solving them and I was like, this is not poop. Clearly this is going to be something edible or else they wouldn't give it to us. I had some, and it was great. It was terrible, but it was edible. It was edible chocolate. So there's a picture of me out there. Let's be clear. You could eat poop.

Oh, the world is not healing. I spoke too soon. Sorry, guys. Sorry, I jumped the gun.

I don't know if I want to co-sign that. Cool. So Sandy, you ate baby shit. What else is going on? Do you have any games for us? I was asked by JPC, have I ever eaten a puzzle?

Oh brother. I'm ready to do some word puzzles. I'm in the mood now after all of this.

Was has anyone ever eaten baby shit? Because I of course have. I mean, I've had a baby for a year now.

I'll pay everyone $20 to move on.

Deal. Deal.

That's all I wanted. Erin was a bribe. All right. Here's what I have for you. The game today is Spoonerisms. You know Spoonerisms?

Yes.

Yes. Created by Shel Silverstein, I believe.

Does anyone have a favorite spoonerism?

Tiggle bitties.

Mine is shake a tit.

Wow, we're continuing on theme.

Oh brother. It's kind of logical.

Yeah, so spoonerisms are when you have two phrases and you swap the first sounds of each or two words in a phrase and you swap the two sounds to make a new phrase or it doesn't have to be two words it could be multiple words as long as you swap two sounds to get a new sensible phrase. So what I've done here is I've taken Names of popular movies, spoonerize them, and I've written the clues for the spoonerized versions. Okay. So you have to tell me what the real version is. Got it. And I'll also tell you the year the movie came out. So if I said, this movie is about a prohibition on floor coverings, and the year is 1989, You'd say, well, floor coverings are called carpets, or they're called rugs, or they're called mats. And a prohibition is a... Another word for prohibition is- Ban. Ban. Ban. So a mat ban would be a spoonerism for Batman. Batman. Which is a movie that came out in 1989. Okay. Shit. Also 1966 and- 2022. It's possible I could get one of these, maybe. I have faith in you. Thank you. Aaron's just gonna blurt, Kark Denite at some point.

My favorite of the Batman.

The Christian Bale movie, Kark Denite.

See, I knew what he was talking about. I'm gonna get one of these.

She's gonna get one.

I'm gonna get one.

Alright, here's your first clue. The cozy corner inside of a ship. The Cozy Corner Inside a Ship, 2004, is the year the movie came out.

Cozy Corner. The Cozy Corner Inside a Ship.

So boat might be part of it. Yeah. What's a cozy corner?

Cozy corner?

Nook. Nook. Nook. Ooh, nook. Nook. Boat.

Nook. Book.

Boat nook. The no book.

No book. The no book. And if only I had ten more seconds, I would have gotten here by myself. Then I didn't and they got it on, now I feel bad. Uh, I'm fine. I'm actually fine over here.

Now I feel bad? Hold on, Erin was well alert, now I feel bad?

I'm actually okay over here. I have to go. I actually do have to go. I do have to take this phone call. Hello? Anyone else? Perfect.

Erin just picked up a big thing of kombucha, it looks like. Or is that Pedialyte? It's my Pedialyte. That's Pedialyte. Oh, shit.

Hello, everybody. Alright, go ahead.

I've never seen a non-baby drink that, but... Kudos to you, Erin.

You've seen me drink it a lot. I've been drinking this for years. It takes little sips.

I consider you baby, Erin baby.

Wait, didn't we have a long discussion where I said Peliolite is for babies, and both of you said no it's not?

Not anymore. Not anymore. It's for Erin. All right. Okay, I want to do another one.

You're misremembering.

Okay. All right. Sandy, let's get another one going. 2015 movie. About an arduous hike in a downpour.

2015?

Storm, rain, arduous hike would be like a... Trek? Slog? Trek. Trek. Slog. Trek. Captain Slog. Star Trek hike. Arduous hike. I like how you guys got there and then walked away from there.

Well, I was still there, but then you said 2015 and 2015 was what cinched it for me because I was like, that was a pre-Trump movie. Everyone was feeling different.

LeBron was acting. Was he in that movie? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Because I think it's, is it set in Cleveland maybe? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. That was back when LeBron was in Cleveland too. Crazy. Wow. Crazy to think back about how far... Okay, yep.

Crazy, crazy to think what happens... Okay, let's go back to 1988 this time about a movie about the pine tree state took off. That's the tagline. From Oregon or Washington? Which one's the pine tree? It is neither. The pine tree state took off.

I will say, I will say Die Hard because that came out in 1988. That's my final answer.

Hidard.

Hidard.

Oh, Game of Thrones. Game of Thrones?

Took off?

Took off.

Took off. Run? Pass it. Run? Took off. Sprint.

Rand.

Yep. Okay, hold... Nobody say it. I swear to God, I have to get one. Okay, hold on. I'm about... Rain Man. It's Rain Man.

It's definitely, definitely, definitely Rain Man. Definitely Rain Man. I keep saying it's like the 20th time I've said I need a sound effects machine with an air horn and a bell. Hot water burn baby. Here we go. Hot water burn baby.

It is crazy to watch Erin, the way that she reacts to getting one right. She's just off in her own world.

That tuckered me out y'all. Baby Erin needs a nap.

Here, what do I have for you?

This is way too long.

Yeah, it's super long. It's super long. That was great. Alright, here's another one.

1997.

Rubs on the head with knuckles and then takes some nibbles. Noogie bites.

Knuckles is Sonic's friend.

Wow, you got that. Right off the bat.

Boogie Nights. Wow, he got noogie bites that quickly.

Noogie bites, like little, little noogies. Like little noogies you keep in the freezer and warm up in the microwave and then eat at midnight.

God, this sucks. Oh, that's me from the past. No, it's me from the past.

OK. All right, here we go.

Do you want to try a guess?

I said Boogie Night.

OK, OK.

This is... No music playing?

I thought I was going to do something. No, I was going to do nothing.

An aquatic bird just may do it. No, it's not any of those. It's an aquatic bird. Stork. Honestly, I looked for more definition about how to specify the bird, and it was just, I... Flamingo? Flamingo Unchained. Is it Flamingo Unchained? Wait, what's the second half of this? Just may do it. An aquatic bird just may do it. Possibly? I don't think we need to do it. Just may. An aquatic bird just may.

Be? May. Just may.

A gull?

Nope.

Not a gull. Just keep naming birds.

Pelican. Pelican.

Nope. Nope. Okay. Pelican. Pelican. Stork. Duck. Swan. Goose. Goose. No. Aquatic bird.

Sandy looked this up to see if there's any more specifics.

Is a heron an aquatic bird?

Ooh, yeah. Yeah. Great one. All right. Fine. Aquatic bird's too big. It is a... Hmm. It's on a coin. Mallard.

No. Ooh. Mallard Fillmore.

That's right. Superhero duo featuring a guy bit by a radioactive rodent and his sidekick, a guy really into sewing. A guy bit by a radioactive rodent, and his sidekick, a guy really into sewing. Ratman and Bobbin. Ratman and, seems true, it's Batman and Robin.

Batman and Robin.

You got it. It's Batman and Robin. Batman and Robin. I forgot the year, 1997.

Ratman and Bobbin is way better.

Wouldn't that be great? Way better. Ratman and Bobbin. Yeah.

Ratman and Bobbin, that has legs.

I feel like if JPC has the power, it would be like, I can bob for apples and get it in one. And then it's like, I gotta wait for a hyper-specific crime at a Halloween party in 1960.

JPC would bob for apples and go in and then come out with a rat in his mouth. That's his superpower.

It's like tying a cherry stem with your tongue, where it's like, the trick is I just keep a tied cherry stem in my mouth. I always have a little rat in my mouth.

I spent so many years learning, teaching myself how to tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue and I could have just cheated.

Yeah, honestly cheat. And then Sandy, the whole reason that you tie a cherry stem with your tongue is that some people are like, wow, this guy can really use his tongue. And then later when you're having sex with that person, they're like, Welcome back.

And they're like, I told you I was good with my tongue. New kink unlocked.

You're welcome, America.

I slept with this guy last night and I think I got a UTI from cherry stims. Oh girl, I've slept with him.

That's rat man.

The next time you're going downtown, why don't you go ahead and do the white lotus.

That's not even a rat man. You slept with Bobbin. You slept with rat man's lesser friend.

Oh my god, ew, what?

No. Sandy, 40 more. I got 10 more. Okay. Okay, let's do them. Crossbreed between a chicken and the guy who shot Hamilton. Burr.

Burr.

And a hen. Hen burr. Ben-hur.

Ben-hur. Ben-hur. Ben-hur. Ben-hur. Ben-hur. Ben-hur.

Erin, you got it.

It is.

Ben. JPC, I want you to hear this when I say it. I hate you.

Hey Erin, her Ben's hurt Ben's.

Yeah, Ben her's hurt Ben's.

Her Ben's hurt Ben's.

I hate you.

I hate you. I'm What's the hottest way to Perry?

What's the hottest way to parry? Matthew. It's gotta be with your dick. Oh my god. Ow! Ow! Ow! Call off the match! It didn't work! It didn't work!

Here's another one. The absolute greatest amount of stovetop cookware, 1997. It says the at the beginning. The absolute greatest amount of stovetop cookware.

Is it pan? Okay, so it's man. Something man.

Pan of La Mancha.

Pan of La Mancha.

Man on fire. Pan on fire.

Okay, I want a Man of La Mancha remake, and instead of Don Quixote, I want a pan with a hat on. Pan of La Mancha.

The pan with the golden... The pan with the iron mask. The pan with the king.

I've lost the thread of what we're supposed to be doing.

It was a huge quantity of paint. The greatest amount of stove top cookware. So if I could give you a tip for solving these, if you have one of the words, take the front off. Plethora. Plenty. And then put it in front of the other word.

Pinnacle. Greatest amount. And it starts with a P?

That's the greatest amount? It would start with an M. No, that's the original does. Yeah.

M. It would start with an M. Most.

Most? Man Post.

Postman.

There it is. Kevin Costner.

I've not heard of that movie. What is this?

It's Kevin Costner. I think after Dances with Wolves... Oh, I didn't call him a pig. I was actually kind of an admirer. After Dances with Wolves, I think he was ruling the roost and Hollywood was like, whatever you want to do. So he made, in quick succession, I believe, Waterworld and Postman, and they were both two of the biggest flops in cinematic history.

And they were both post-apocalyptic, right?

I think so. Yes. And in fact, I think you could say with all the negative reviews that the Postman received the most pan. Ooh, wow. Oh yeah. Can you do one of those air horns for me?

Oh yeah, let's do it.

Don't make it a fart noise.

Mallard Fillmore. Hold on, let's give it one more try. So all I have is a quack, so maybe not.

All right, here's another one. We'll move past it. Dirt and rubbish scattered untidily all over the floor.

1987.

A movie I only saw for the first time recently. I don't know if this helps you at all.

Droon.

That's it.

Trash strewn.

One of those words is right.

Garbage.

Strewn. Dirt and rubbish.

Dirt. Rubbish.

It's not a word you use very often, but it is a word that means dirt and rubbish. Refuse. I would say focus on the other word that you know.

Strewn.

And then take the front off, put it at the end. Or put it in front of the other word.

So strewn, but we don't know. It could be the S-T also, right?

Well, it is. If the word is strewn, then you're taking off S-T-R. Oh, okay. It's the first sound.

Oh, it's the first sound. So strewn, S-T-R, and it's for trash.

Oh, this is plus strewn. The Vietnam movie, plus Strune. That was 1986. Sandy, where are you going? Danny's putting on a jet pack.

So what's the year on this one, Sandy?

87.

So STR, and it's a word for trash, that starts with STR? No, that's not right.

No. No.

Rubbish.

I'm saying, by the name of the movie, and you know the word is Strune. Take oon and then put str after it, or in front of the other word, and see in your head you can come up with a two-syllable name. Erin, did you not get my plastroon jokes?

Adal, I'm underwater over here, pal. I'm trying to keep track of all these clues. I'm trying to not look like a crazy idiot who's drinking Pedialyte at 6 p.m. on a Monday night, Adal. I'm doing my best over here. I realized today that I hate JPC. That's a lot to carry.

I feel like I'm not going to get this unless I can get the trash part of it. Strewn rubbish.

S-T-R, that begins... So, oon.

All we have is oon, and then the S-T-R is the beginning of the other word. Strewn trash. Strewn... But I feel like it's... Oonstra. Oh, moonstruck. Moonstruck. Moonstruck. Fuck. It's a moonstruck. Goddammit.

So what's the Spoonerism? Muck. So it's strewn muck? Strewn muck. Muck. Moon. Struck. Strewn muck.

I'm so confused. Strewn muck.

Step out of it.

Hey everyone.

Yeah, one of my overlooked embarrassing holes in my history. That also included Jaws up until like five or six years ago. I was like, man, this movie slaps. Why didn't anyone tell me about this movie?

But yeah, Moonstruck rules. Let's keep it going. Let's watch Jaws 2. By the way, Moonstruck 2 absolutely whips. Sandy, we have time for one more. Can we do one more? No. And can it be your best one? Oh, I didn't rank these by best.

Oh, we're out?

No, no, I got plenty.

I got lots. I got lots more. I got like five or six more. Yeah, I got a good one. Okay. Okay. I'm looking at all the ones we didn't get to. I'm trying to ... Shit, it's here. Okay, here we go. The urine moved quickly. Piss Runnings.

2006.

Cool Pissings.

2006.

Am I crazy? P? You're not crazy. Is it Cool Pissings? Is it P? Yeah, it's not. Piss Congeniality? No.

Wow. Piss Congeniality is a different game, but it's a really good game.

I have to get Sandy Bullock on the phone.

This word is not used very frequently.

Micturate. Micturate.

Urine.

It does mean to move quickly.

Pedialyte after it's been through me.

The urine part is normal. The moved quickly word is not something you use very often. Anyway, think about 2006 movie, very popular. Do we think it's piss, right? I don't know that anyone pees in the movie, so that won't help. So it's gotta be miss, right?

Sandy, did you tell us that we got pissed, right?

It's not piss. Oh, is it pee? Yes. Pee myself and Irene. Pee my pants and Irene. Pee.

So it's E. Okay. And it's move quickly.

Uh-huh. Hustle. Sprint. Yeah, Erin said hustle. Talk to. Talk to.

Oh God, what is move quickly? Run, sprint, jog.

It's past tense. That's a help. Ran. Right. So the movie probably ends in ED because it's past tense. Oh, OK. So you have P, 2006, and the N has P, but so you got a spoonerized P, so it's going to be E. Is it ET? I peed phone home.

The Prestige?

That's when I'm drunk. No, because that's only one word or one syllable. It's P, but instead of P, it's E and then the P sound. So inside the word is Eep. And it moved quickly. P-parted? P-parted. You got it.

Yeah.

No, it's not P-parted. It's D-parted or P-darted. P-darted.

Did I just get one without you guys giving it to me? Am I a secret genius?

And I have to give credit to one of my subscribers, Malaka, who wrote that one. So good. Thank you for that.

Great job.

We'll have to get the other ones another time.

Wow. Erin, let's give you your sound effect. Okay, slap me hard in the face. Jesus Christ.

Erin, I know you already went to college, but we just got an email. I guess someone from MIT is listening to this live somehow, and they're inviting you to go to MIT on a full scholarship to eat baby shit?

Yeah, no, they've done this before. They want to study my brain to see how I've been able to stay alive this long.

Sandy, where can people study your brain?

Oh, well, while it's still inside my skull, I think you could do it best at Instagram, which is Mystery League on Instagram or on threads. And I have a newsletter where you can hear and read all the output from my brain. That is called Signals. It's at Signals.fun, S-I-G-N-A-L-S.fun, F-U-N. Beyond that, I don't know. Come and walk around Chicago singing a song. Maybe I'll run into you. It could be a puzzle.

Sandy, I know that you said before we started this that you didn't want a gift, but we did get you a little something. No, I said I did want a gift. It's a coffin full of sand. Get the fuck in here. Get the fuck in here. Get the fuck in here. Coffin full of sand. God, he never goes in easy.

Never goes in easy.

Well, it's that time again to say a fond farewell to everyone listening. Erin Keif, do you have anything to plug or promote?

I would like to plug the Hey Riddle Riddle Patreon. We've been giggling our asses off over there recently. Do a seven-day free trial, listen to whatever episodes you want, and then say, maybe recommend it to a friend if you enjoy it. Adal, anything to plug from you?

A few quick things. One, there's a show on HBO Max. How do you say it? Just Max? Do you just say Max? Or do you say HBO Max?

HBO Max now, yeah. Okay.

There's a show on Max called Somebody Somewhere. It's in its third season. Third season will have come out by the time this airs. And my sister, Saidiya, is in that third season.

Whoa!

So please watch Somebody Somewhere. So cool. Watch the first two seasons and then enjoy Saidiya in the third season.

Do you need context? Can I just jump into the third season?

I don't know yet. I haven't watched it. I don't think it's come out yet by the time this is currently, but I would assume a little context wouldn't hurt. I also want to plug and promote that I was on two podcasts. I guess it again on one of my favorite podcasts, The Restricted Section. So please check out all those episodes. And then I was also a guest on Source Not Found podcast. So check that out as well. JPC, anything to plug, promote, or a review to read?

Yeah, let's read a review, shall we? If you want to get a review featured on the show, just leave us a five star review anywhere you leave reviews. Hey, this one's from Thora Birch. Thora says, Hey Riddle Riddle is a land of magic. JPC here with some important information. Come here. This cat here binks. He can talk. My brother's a virgin. He lit the black flame candle. The witches are back from the dead and they're after us. We need help.

Wait, Thora Birch, isn't that an actor?

I don't know, man, but either way, that's a review.

Laura Birch. I know that name, Thora Birch.

That's a pretty cool sounding name.

Thora Birch. I feel like that's, it's either a type of tree or it's a actor.

It's definitely a type of tree. And why not both?

Thora Birch.

And why not both? Hey, and also, a little plug here, register to vote. Now, it's too late for whatever happened for this one, but you know, it's always fun to just register for something. It's like signing up for- Classic Hey Riddle Riddle.

Perfect, perfect timing, everybody.

Don't vote, but register. That'll fuck with their heads, man. They're going to be like, this is going to be a big election. Look at all these people registering. Then you just sit your ass at home. Fun.

And before it's too late, grab your Pink Ranger t-shirt that says, I think I'm going to crumb vote.

Sorry, a little late on that.

Oh, Jupiter, I forgot that. I always forget I have the pull cord for this. I always forget.

There are any parrots in the music? Hey there, animals and parades. If you liked that, you're going to love this week's Patreon. It's a whole episode of Animal Parade. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash HeyRiddleRiddle by joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your seven-day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month and you get those ad-free episodes. See you there.

That was a hate gum podcast.