Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum podcast. What?

I'm sorry, did you just wake up? I've been saying hello for like four minutes.

JPC?

Have you? From work? Erin from work?

Hi, it's dark in here.

Erin, where are we?

I don't know, but it's black in here. It smells bad and it's cold.

Honestly, I don't hate the cold. This summer has sucked with the heat, but yeah, it does smell like... What is that smell?

I don't know. I'm tied up. Are you tied up?

Um, yeah, but without getting too much into my thing, it doesn't really bother me.

Cool, cool, cool. Let me find a light switch.

Because of kind of my whole... You don't have to keep going.

Good, good. Fine. Uh oh.

Oh, no. We... Oh, you know what? I know what this is.

What?

I feel like this is like a saw thing. I feel like I'm handcuffed to a radiator. Saw thing.

There's a saw on the ground. Rise and shine, Erin and JPC. This is your wake-up call. You're probably wondering where you are. No.

No, it's a saw thing.

It's a saw thing. Do we think I captured the right timing for this? This is SAWV. SAW. SAW. SAW. SAW. SAW. SAW.

Okay. That's what it is?

That's what it is.

So wait, when you said right time, did you mean like August? Culturally? Both. Yeah. Cause it's been like 15 years and it's more like an October thing, right?

Okay, okay enough. I've been rude. I haven't even introduced myself. You know that smell you're smelling? Look in the middle of the floor and you'll see the jaw of a pig. My name is Pig Jaw. Do you want us to celebrate every choice or do you want to get another one?

It feels like you had a pig jaw.

Weird setups and contraptions, but I'm pretty broke at the moment, so Riddles is all there is. And I tried to kidnap your other host, Adal Rifai, but he didn't answer the door when I knocked at 4 p.m. yesterday.

Smart.

It's honestly not a wild 4 p.m. Is he sleeping? I don't know what's going on.

No, yeah, that's- you could've asked us.

That's a sleep time. Yeah, it can't be great for you to keep those hours. Anyways.

I feel like with- there's three of us, it's gonna be way easier.

Well, I'm glad you said that because I do have a third for you. I found you a ringer, someone who is actually good at riddies and pussies. She's a former contestant on seasons 15 and 31 of the hit TV show Survivor. Huge fan of Survivor. And the co-host of the Reality Escape Pod, which is the premiere podcast for all your escape room and immersive gaming needs. Pushing the button to open the door and say hello to Peih-Gee Law.

Hi everybody. You do know that on Survivor, there's only one Survivor at the end.

Hey, if you're passing the show, you're a winner to me.

I don't know if this is a good crossover series, but... You're way too cool to be here.

I guess my question is, because I'm not a Survivor watcher, did you win any of those seasons? I'm asking.

Wow. I don't know. Would I be on this pot? No.

Really good point. Then I'm not worried. There's a pretty good chance that I'll walk out of here alive, I guess.

I did barely good enough to come back twice. There you go. There is that.

It's gonna be really hard to not ask you questions about Survivor this whole time. I'm a huge fan and I'm freaking out, but I will try my best to focus on these riddles.

Apparently, Pigjaw is a big fan of Survivor, so maybe some of the puzzles and the traps will be Survivor-themed, and so maybe some of the lore will help us through it.

It's my hope. I have to run the lows real quick for something unrelated. Why don't you two ask PG about her relationship with riddles and puzzles?

No, I don't want to be a big fan boy, but I have to ask, I just have to ask, what is Greg Proops like?

That's not his name.

Erin, first of all, first of all, I'm asking you about what the guy who was on Whose Line Is It Anyway for a while was like, you didn't meet him? You've been in LA for like three years.

PG, I've got a question for you. What is your relationship with riddles and puzzles like? When did it start?

You know what, honestly, I think it started when I read The Westing Game. My favorite book! My favorite book! Your favorite book! Yes, of course, it's The Westing Game. Are you kidding? The Westing Game, Encyclopedia Brown, like all of these books back then, those, that's the gateway drug, you know, into the whole like puzzles and Riddles not so much. I feel like riddles tend to be really esoteric. You know they say the difference between like riddles and jokes. Jokes are funny. Um but I do love me a good puzzle and I like puzzles because they're kind of a process like and it usually doesn't require outside knowledge or too much yes there's creative thinking but it's more about I don't know being clever and less about like the poetry of it if that makes sense but yeah and then Survivor is basically like a It's basically a LARP. It's a live action role play. We're just on there role playing as castaways and we're playing like a live action board game on television. Somehow it's fun. I don't know.

Yeah. And there's like so many puzzles inside challenges too. I feel like especially now the modern version of the show, there's even more puzzles.

They do. They have all different kinds. They've got like their classic slide puzzle. They have jigsaw puzzles, which I was terrible. Oh man, I was so bad at these. Yeah. So no jigsaw puzzles, please.

And you're a big fan of escape rooms now. Is there a favorite escape room that you've ever done?

That's like asking about your favorite child. And I have a favorite child. That was my next question.

I wrote that one down.

I would say probably the best one I've ever done is this escape room called Molly's Game just outside of Amsterdam in the Netherlands. Oh, cool. It's bonkers. They actually took two regular escape rooms and they knocked down the walls and they just turned the space into one giant one. There's all kinds of crazy stuff going on. But my favorite companies are probably Dark Park also in Amsterdam and then Escapearium in Montreal. And all of these companies are just building quality Quality experiences. You feel like you're in a movie. They're crazy. I actually do.

So I guess I do see what's going on here. So you were watching a movie. So Molly's Game is Jessica Chastain's movie.

Erin Sorkin, Ronya.

You're just Elba, by the way.

Michael Cera was playing Toby Maguire. I would not escape a room if you know what I'm saying.

What do you think makes for a good escape room? Like what sets them apart?

A good storyline. I mean it's everything really. Like what makes for a good movie or you know a good show. Well, yes, yes.

Well, speaking of a good storyline, Lowe's was closed, but did I mention I'm Pig Jaw? I'm a pig in a suit of armor, but am I upright? Not on all fours? Does that make sense?

We love it. It's good. Let's keep going.

Do you want to play a game? We can't see you. I bet you're on all fours.

And PG, I just have to say, because I respect you, I'm not going to have you chained to any pipes or anything, and you can kind of come and go as you please.

Fair. Appreciate that. Lovely. Why are you in a suit of armor, by the way? Are you afraid of us?

Is that... I am afraid of humans, which is why I'm also in this room kind of observing, just because, yeah, humans are the most dangerous animal.

Fair enough. That's true.

And they also, I mean, they eat pigs. Not me, pig jaw, but humans do eat pigs. So yeah, the arm are probably necessary.

Don't tell him.

Yes. Did you know that in that little nursery rhyme, this little piggy went to the market? Do you know that that means that the pig was dead, like being sold at the market? Did everyone know that? We don't know that for sure.

I just learned this. That could be right.

Question number one, if you want to get out with your lives, go to JPC and Erin, PG, again, leave at any time. What can be placed between three and seven to produce a number that is bigger than three and smaller than seven? Tick tock. Tick tock. Sorry, I'm on tick tock.

Erin's writing stuff. Should I have like a pen and paper?

How did you get a pen and paper?

I left my backpack in there. I'm a pick a knight's armor with a backpack. I keistered it. I keistered a pen and paper.

Okay, let's see. Can you read it again? I think that this is complicated enough. I'd like to hear it.

I should say you probably don't need bet in favor for this, but God bless. What can be placed between three and seven to produce a number that is bigger than three and smaller than seven? Anything in the world placed between them?

I mean, could you just... bigger than three and smaller than seven? I would say... Uh, a minus sign? Or a plus sign?

No, a plus sign.

What about a decimal point?

PG. Oh my gosh. Immediately got it. It is a decibel. If you put a decibel between 3 and 7, that makes 3.7, which is bigger than 3 and smaller than 7. Everyone take note.

Erin, write that down. Oh my god. I was totally kidding. Turns out I four scummed my way into the answer.

Even when she's messing around, she's better than you two. Next question.

I kind of just want to cut my hand off. You know what, I'll do a couple more of these before, but you know, I got the saw here. Although, Pigjaw, where'd you get this saw?

Oh, Lowe's. I have a Lowe's gift card and that's where I get most of my... Don't try and leave, because even if you cut off your hand, I have placed a chip inside of you.

Under your tongue there is an awful sour cream in your head.

Your next riddle. If planet Earth has a heart, which body parts does Mars have? If planet Earth has a heart, which body part does Mars have?

Girls go to knowledge. College get more knowledge. Boys get more sleep. Who said that?

An arm. I said it. Do you have to explain it?

You are so close. Can you add one more letter to it?

Arms. Arms.

It's arms.

That is correct, it is arms.

How did you get your answer?

Because you can spell heart from Earth. I'm just sort of looking down. Holy shit, you're right. And then you can spell arms from Mars.

Wait, you said we wouldn't need a pen and paper. That one is impossible to solve with that pen and paper.

Well, if you want to solve them, yeah, you need pen and paper. Come on.

I threw mine out. You just said I didn't need it.

Are we ready for our next riddle?

Yes.

I am. A kidnapper sent a ransom note. He prepared it carefully and ensured that it contained no fingerprints. Yet it was used to prove his guilt. Ow. And this happened to me, so this is like a fun, true story.

Is this like DNA sampling when he licked the envelope?

Motherfuck! We are going to run out of room.

What is that? Well I guess we know who's surviving in this room.

Can we vote people out? I would like to get voted out please.

I basically just watched Deputy Marshal Raylan Givens do that same thing on Justified, so... Are you a fan of Justified? Uh, it can of course, but yeah.

She's a dude of Margot Martindale, come on.

Oh my god, Varka Martindale, national treasure.

Unbelievable.

As long as she's American. I guess I don't know if she's what national treasure she is. Just because we're flying... She's a nation's treasure.

Just because PG is having us fly through these rules pretty quick, what other TV are we watching, huh? No.

No.

No.

No.

You did this. All right, all right. Here we go. This should be a little bit longer. Some people's names, like Pigjaw or Will Power, short for William Power, some people's names suggest a certain personality or career choice. Here are some last names and professions in no particular order. For each last name, your task is to think of a common first name such that it suggests that one of the given professions, each last name and profession will only be used once. For example, if I were to say the last name Day and meteorologist, you would might come up with Sunny. Sunny Day would suggest a meteorologist.

Oh, got it. Okay.

Does that make sense?

I mean these absolutely require pen and paper.

These are all pen and paper riddles.

The last names you have are Ding, Fue, King, Lim, Pain, and Peace. And you will add a first name to each one to produce a musician, author, chef, comedian, architect, and politician.

And does it have to be like a name name or just a word?

Cuz, cuz, cuz, alright, pig jaw, let me ask you this. Yes. You said chef, and one of the words is Flay. So is the answer Bobby Flay?

No, but oh my god, have you ever watched, have you ever watched this show?

Beat Bobby Flay?

Beat Bobby Flay. He's so charming. Moms love him.

I love when people beat him. Here's the thing about Beat Bobby Flay. It's always in cooking.

That sucks. You want people to arm wrestle Bobby Flay?

I want someone to do one-on-one basketball with Bobby Flay with his ass. He's like, you know, he's not gonna be able to hold a candle against like a professional basketball player. That's true.

We are beating him senseless.

We're gonna go beat him, I love that. Yeah, okay, cool.

But I'm Pigjaw, I'm wrong in that. Bobby Flay is not the answer for Chef.

No, we're looking for the last name and the first name that you come up with to combine to sort of produce a word versus a proper noun name. Okay, okay.

Pigjaw, I'm really disappointed that actually my last name is not on there.

Oh, I must have left one off. There's one more last name I see, and it's Law. This one's easy.

It could be a lawyer. In the military. This is a joke I've heard my whole life. I'll tell you that much.

This is... How do I get the missing one? If the last name was Law, and the first name was L.A., you could be a TV show.

Well, I'll keep...

Trying to find that piece of paper that has that profession, but you get to work on the ones I gave you.

Okay. Okay. So we have musician, author, chef, comedian, architect, and politician, right? Are the, are the, are the jobs that we have to solve for?

Mm-hmm.

Correct.

But you have to match them to the last name. Mm-hmm. And we have to make up a first name.

Yeah. Yeah.

Window pane for architect.

But his window, but his window.

That's what I was asking. My son's name is Window and he gets bullied mercilessly.

Just chiming in here, they will be more akin to, typical is the wrong word, based on one of your co-hosts being Adal Rifai, but names that you might find in a name book or something. So like Sunny Day?

Got it.

Yeah.

Okay.

So, but you didn't answer Erin's question, Pickjaw. Does window work or?

No. Window is not a typical name.

I'm looking at a name book and it says, okay, I'm sorry, this is a book of Windows names. Never mind.

Okay, what about Wingding for an author that only writes using the Wingding's font? Somebody make that book. I actually have an uncle named Wing, so I'm going to throw that out there.

Incredible.

Uh, I mean... So you have to take it. You have to take it.

I mean, absolutely bonus points.

Okay, I would like to say Stephen King and that would be a father.

No.

No. King. How does the game work?

Mm-hmm. Because I was about to say T-Pain, who is a musician. Does that work?

No. Play... Play must be chef, right?

Phil, Phil Flay, Phil A, Phil Flay.

I know, okay, I have one. Warren Peace is an author.

PG, once again you are crushing it. Warren Peace, if you add Warren to peace, you get the author, Warren Peace.

Amazing.

You get the author, Warren Peace, got it, got it. Lin, Lin, Lin, Lin. I'm pretty sure I said it earlier, but one of the last names is Law and one of the professions is Feline Male.

You're making this harder. Our brains already hurt from this game.

This is what happens when you make one up on the spot.

Dang.

Pig John, just go with what you wrote Pig John.

I'm a pig in armor. What do you want? It's an achievement I can talk.

Chef Flay. Let's see.

Erin, I hint for you.

Yes.

Can you hear me? This should only go to you. I've put a little air butt in your ear.

Nothing in the rules say that air butts have something there, whatever.

Think dessert, or even breakfast.

Pancakes, waffles, bacon, eggs.

Eggs is right. You might make this dish out of eggs.

Omelette, Benedict.

Rise to the occasion, Erin. Rise to the occasion.

Akish. Bread. Akish. A souffle.

A frittata.

Sous.

Sous. Souffle. Souffle. Souffle is your chef. You may cross flay and chef off your lists. Okay, okay.

PG, it's amazing that every time you joke, you manage to completely nail what the answer is. It's awesome.

Does anybody actually eat souffle for breakfast? Wow, I feel cold. Good question. This is a fancy, fancy breakfast.

Yeah, souffle for breakfast.

I've been eating out of a trough for 22 years. I deserve souffle. Okay.

Welding, wetting, netting. Hey J.P.

St. Aaron, I'd probably just give some room to P.G. She's good at questioning. That's kind of what I'm doing.

All right, so we have chef and author out of the way.

Chef and author are done. So we still have musician, comedian, architect, and politician.

And I'd say musician is probably the hardest, though I would focus on the others first. Okay, okay. And I would say Architect and Comedian are very common names. Very, very, uh, run-of-the-mill boring names. Apologies to any of our listeners who might, oh, this isn't broadcast, it's just my personal game.

Yeah. Yeah. John. Jacqueline. Jacqueline. No, that's nothing. That's just someone's first name. So, Jacqueline Lynn.

Katie. Gosh, this is hard.

Can one of them be a cowboy and can it be John Payne?

I've actually heard you say the correct answer for a first and last name a few times when referring to how PG is getting these answers correct.

Joe. Joking.

Your comedian is Joe King. PG, you did it again. I mean, Erin... Erin said it, Erin said it, but it was in response to you getting the answers right by joking.

Exactly.

So even when she's not saying the right answer, she's the catalyst to the right answer.

She's the reason why I get it. So what's left? Is Lin left? And Ding? And Pain?

Architect? You have architect, musician, and politician left. The last names you have are Ding, Lin, and Pain.

Pain is architect, right? No. Woah.

Woah.

Okay, nevermind.

Architect is one of the most common names.

So, it's gotta be like Ron-ding.

Res-my-thing.

Think about any guy who's like, tan, he's wearing golf shorts, he's got veneers, he drives a raincoat. He's gonna shake your hand real hard and say, Hey, my name's... Brad? Close. First letter, right? Oh, my name is...

Brett is 100% like an 80s movie villain. He's gonna like ski down a mountain and insult you on the way down.

Spray the snow.

Yeah, exactly. Ben?

Bob? Ben and Bob are close. That's a shortened version.

Bro. Short for Broseph.

Think Saxophone and Sunglasses. Think K-Shack and Ghostbuster. Put it together.

Building.

Building. Building is your architect.

Oh my god. I'm gonna start chewing off my foot. I'm chewing it off.

You think a guy with like that surfer guy that you described would be a bill?

I didn't describe a surfer I was trying to describe. What did you describe? Like a wealthy guy on the golf course, he's like, hey my name's William Fredscopy Bill, gives you too hard of a handshake if he has to prove something.

No, no, that was a Brett. Bill is like the janitor that has to clean up after that guy. Are you kidding me?

Like Bill Murray, Bill Clinton, like where are these bills that you're... Hey everyone.

Hey everyone. I'm a 23 year old pig in armor with a backpack. I don't know what you expect from me.

Oh, so we can't be mad at you because what you are?

No.

I guess that's fair.

Okay, we have a couple more of these I think, and I gotta, we gotta be done. Okay.

You have Lynn and Payne remain. Those are your musician and politician. One is a fairly common name, one is a little bit more uncommon. Not terribly uncommon, but a little more uncommon.

Musician and politician. Musician and politician. Yes.

Lynn?

Violet Lynn. Viola Lynn.

That's good. Violin.

Oh.

Erin, the musician, there's three options for it, and you gave one of them, and Peih-Gee gave the other. It can either be a mandolin, a mandolin, violin, or viola. Viola-lin. So those are the three correct answers. You got two of the three, which is amazing. Politician has left. I think we know which one that is. That's Payne, our politician. Who said that? Cam. Not me.

Peih-Gee said it.

Peih-Gee did it again. Cam Payne. Cam Payne, the politician.

How did I not get that I have a nephew named Cam?

I hope he's not listening.

I know. I'm chaining myself up as we speak.

Well, while you do that, why don't we take a quick break and we'll be right back with more Big John.

Big John.

I know what you're thinking. Do I have a new hat, Adal and JPC? New haircut? Why am I walking around with so much confidence?

I bet you're wondering. I wanted pretzels from the food court.

And I was just going to let you know that it looks like you leaned on paint.

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Hey, what's going on? Somebody leaned over my rocket money painting. Run. Everybody run. Run. Oh no. Maroon.

Is that DaVinci?

Yeah.

Yes.

And bye.

Okay, Peih-Gee. I know I've been talking to you about Survivor for three hours, but I have a few more questions. Let's see. What is your favorite season of Survivor, like when you watched it?

I really liked David versus Goliath. That's my favorite too. It's so good. It's a really good season. You have some really good nerds on there. You've got just... The show is good because of the characters. They always have these amazing characters, but that's one of the best ones. Of course, I think China, season 15, is probably up there.

Famously. So you were on twice. When you found out you were going on again, what were you dreading about going back to and what were you looking forward to about going back?

Oh my God. Everything. Everything both ways. I think I probably regretted the most was not networking enough with all the other survivor players. That's the biggest thing when you go back. It's going back the second time, it's all business. So it's not fun at all. Everybody's out for blood. You can't even take a break. Like even when you win, you go back to camp. Usually your first Hey Riddle. In some ways, nobody had to say anything. Right away, we were building the shelter. We had fire. It was clockwork. So that part was a lot easier.

Oh, awesome. OK. And when you watched the show for both of the seasons you were on, were there any moments that super surprised you, like a choice someone had made or something that someone said in one of their interviews? Was there anything that really surprised you in the edit?

I can tell you what surprised me about myself because having to watch, I mean you guys are on podcasts so you know, but having to watch or listen to yourself without your editing is horrific. They basic, these assholes, these asshole editors left in every single, I say like a lot, okay? I'm from LA.

Casey plug your ears. Casey plug your ears. This is not about you.

Just don't listen to this part, Casey. And I had a conversation with Amanda Kimmel where every other word was like and these guys, these asshole editors subtitled it for literally no reason. We weren't whispering, we weren't speaking in like another language, but they decided to subtitle this and they left in every single like in this entire conversation.

That's so ridiculous. And my final question, and then, uh, uh, PigSaw. PigJaw? PigJaw? Is that your name?

Hey Erin, X name on the PigSaw. You can't say that because we can't get, uh, sued for, so just make sure PigJaw was- Okay Bobby Flay is already suing us, so I say bring it on.

My final question is, do you have a favorite player of all time? Actually, I have two more questions. Do you have a favorite player of all time? And what was your favorite moment of being on the show in either season that you're on?

Oh my God. What's with asking these favorites? It's so tough to pick amongst everybody. Gosh, I would say probably either, probably Sandra. I think Sandra is a good pick. Suri is good. I actually really liked watching Todd from my first season play, but it's so long ago now. But I just thought, you know, this was a guy I was gutting for him for day one and because I knew he was going to win. I was like, if you don't vote him out, I know he's going to win. And he just navigated the entire thing like he had a runbook or something, you know, so.

Good answer.

I just want to talk. You are discussing. Hey, P.G., do you ever get lost in Jeff Probstimples?

Jeff Probst. That's the guy I was thinking of.

Did they give you bug spray? I'm so stressed out when I watch the show about the mosquitoes.

P.G., I don't know if you noticed, but if you check your jacket pocket, I slept a KitKat in there, so.

Ah, someone's been doing his homework.

I'm a pig in armor, I don't know.

Iconic. If people don't know this, my dad snuck me a KitKat when I was on Survivor China. And the reason he picked a KitKat is because it is square and he could hide it in his back pocket without it poking out.

And Survivor Security tackled him immediately.

No.

KitKat is the only candy bar that can become four shivs. Not the way I eat it. Not the way you eat it. Wait, what do you mean pig jaw? How do you eat it? Because our co-host Adal also eats Kit Kats in a fucked up way.

I'm a pig in armor wearing a backpack.

Does he eat it straight across? He just eats it.

He just takes a big fucking bite.

He doesn't break anything up.

He just chops it.

It's horrible.

I'm Peih John. Welcome back to SAW. As you three notice, there's a bathtub in the middle of the room, filled to the lip. I have a little test for you. Next to the tub, filled with water, I have placed a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket. You must empty the bathtub as quickly as possible. Tell me, what will you do?

Take the drain out man. There's a stopper at the bottom.

Yeah, it's full of plug. It's full of plug. Yeah, I thought that was going to be a tough one anyway. Let's see what we got.

What else? What else? Although, it's a bathtub that's not connected to any plumbing. It does have a stopper in it. I don't know how you got the water into the thing. Did you use the buckets and the teaspoon and stuff to put the water in?

Yeah, it took a long time. I started with the teaspoon. I don't know why.

Pig jaw. What are you doing?

Well, I have friends, teacup pigs. I figured next Riddle. Close your eyes. And imagine we're on a huge estate and Sir Montoya can't sleep in his bed. He looks around waiting for sleep when suddenly the door opens and two robbers discreetly enter. They realize Sir Montoya is awake and not only that, he's watching them. Nonetheless, the thieves ignore him and start pulling paintings off the wall, emptying drawers, taking all valuables, and leaving silently under Sir Montoya's gaze. He doesn't move, he doesn't flinch, he doesn't call anyone even though there's a telephone in his room. He has no health problems that prevent him from moving or even from seeing. So why does Sir Montoya not react and let the thieves take everything he owns?

Oh, I was gonna say he was blind, but... He's a dog. He's a cat.

I love those answers.

It's probably my dog. No, my dog would be greeting them and welcoming them to take off.

Showing them directly to all the valuables.

Exactly.

Yeah, the dog shows the valuables and it's like, here's where they keep the treats. And they're like, this is dog food. We are robbers.

We cannot sell this.

I think it would be very fun to ask your pet what your most valuable item in the house was and just see your pet's answer. Because they would get it wrong, but it would be cute as hell.

Erin, technically dog or cat work here, but that is not the answer I have. Well, they just don't wait for sleep to come.

Don't they? You don't want to think about it, but they can feel things too.

You don't want to think about it, Adal. You have to admit, you don't want to think about that. Gotta burn all my paintings.

Is it my computer? I'm like, what else can go to sleep?

That also works, that's a great guess.

Oh, is Sir Montoya the name that they gave their Roomba robot vacuum? Not a sponsor of the show yet, but if they want to be, I like the product.

No, but I will be changing my Roomba's name to Sir Montoya.

Mine's his Marty Meatballs.

I will say cat and dog are close as maybe a strong word, but in that vicinity... An animal. Uh, not in it. Well, it's a triangle, I guess.

Does the name have a special significance, Sir Montoya?

Um, yes, in that the Sir I think is meant to throw you off slightly, but... Is Sir Montoya like a mounted moose head or something like that, like that's on the wall? Huh.

So you think this is like a Disney World, like, uh, Country Bear Jamboree situation where the moose head talks?

I'm thinking that what happened was the moose got knighted before it died. Because they saved the queens, life in the forest or something.

No. GBC the moose wasn't knighted. If you listened, he couldn't fall asleep, so he wasn't knighted. No, that's true.

That's how you are knighted. Wink, wink.

Ow. Wait. Oh, I said upon shit. They're onto you.

They're onto you. We've been onto you, man.

Let's see. A fish?

Is it a person? It's a human?

It's a pig. It's a pig. And the robbers are the people chained up that are just running away with all of the riddles.

Amen. I love this.

Sir Montoya was my name before these thieves stole my family's crest in fortune.

This can't be your history. This can't be it.

I was cast into the streets a hedge night. Shouldn't be. Shouldn't be what it is. It was a baby. Sir Montoya's a baby.

Does Sir Montoya have nipples, Greg? And can you milk me?

The baby, Sir Montoya's a baby.

Sir Montoya's a baby?

Yeah. What? Aren't babies mammals? Did I fuck up?

I'll have to Google it. I left a phone in there? Why is the baby named Sir Montoya? I have to ask, why is the baby named Sir Montoya?

Wealth? I don't know, rich people stuff. If you were rich and you had a baby, wouldn't you call it like Dame, Dame Mandy Baby or something?

Apparently Pigjaw would name it Bill, because that's the name of a rich person.

Weird. Why don't more people name their baby like Doctor? Doctor Coan?

That's cool. Listen, that one was a bit of a stinker. That's coming from a pig. I'm going to eat my Jimmy John souffle. Peih-Gee, did you happen to bring any sort of... Do you have any riddles on you or anything? Any game or anything like that?

I do have a game. I don't know if it's going to be as fun as these, but we can try them.

And also, we apologize for Pigjaw. He should really be leaning on you to torture us with the riddles and the games and stuff like that. That's Pigjaw's responsibility.

You guys may be chewing your ankles off, Matthew. We'll see how this goes.

Erin, how can you not do the splits but you can chew your own ankle?

One thing that I'll do is I'll get out of a situation I don't want to be in. I don't care if I tear every muscle in my body, I'm getting the hell out of here.

So you could have let me for dinner the other night. I mean Adal, and Peih-Gee I'm going to join in on these if you don't mind. Go ahead Peih-Gee.

Alright, so in honor of your podcast, I have made a game where the answer will all contain, the answer will all be a word that will contain the letters either Hey, H-E-Y, R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R-I-D-R- So, to walk with short steps that tilt the body from side to side like a penguin. Waddle. Waddle. Waddle.

Waddle. My favorite Star Wars character. I made the joke first.

Yup. Lacking moisture, especially having insufficient rainfall to support trees or woody plants.

Arid.

Erin, there you go.

Nice. Erin Keif.

You're a wizard, Erin. It's Adal's cleaning up. All right, the watery part of milk that separates from the curds.

Way. Way. Way. Way.

Way.

Way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way, way

All right. A long handled spoon with a deep bowl meant for serving soup and other liquids. Riddle. Man, you guys are sweeping through. I had actually some harder ones that I tested them on friends and family and they were like, these are too hard. You need to make them easier.

Our brains are broken from doing this show for five years, so.

I'm on autopilot.

I'm chewing on my ankle. Now I know how Adal felt earlier in the episode. To cheat or defraud of money or property.

Podcast.

Patreon.

Swindle.

There you go.

Swindle has hay in it.

You can't spell swine without swindle.

A woman who is about to be married or has recently been married.

Bride.

Beyonce.

Beyonce? Is that what you said? No, I said bride as well in case you cut that.

a wide-angled photographic lens that creates a rounded visual distortion at the edges.

Fish Eye. So many terrible 90s music videos shot with that. So I've heard, so I've heard.

All on the floor.

There were literally like three words in the English language that have H-E-Y in them. And you've had two of them now. A narrow ribbon-like strip of dough.

Breadstick.

Why is everybody laughing? Okay. Fettuccine. Pasta. Angel hair.

Is this like what you put over a pie, like the latticework for a pie?

No, I actually had additional cluing for this that I am now omitting because you guys are just tearing through these.

Okay. Linguine? No. It's a ribbon-like strip of dough.

Often featured in pasta dishes or ramen.

Noodle.

Noodle. Farr-Farr. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle.

Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle. Noodle A small bed for Sir Montoya. Yes. Cradle, yes.

Cradle.

And the last one is a traffic jam where no vehicular movement is possible. Especially because the intersections are all blocked. And we get this a lot in LA. Standstill?

A day-ruiner.

What happens when I'm running late?

Road rage. So this is a type of traffic jam.

It's a type of gridlock. There you guys go.

I loved this. This was so fun.

Oh my God. The craziest thing about this is that I chewed through my entire ankle and it didn't even hurt because I was having such a good time. And I'm attached with the wrist. I shouldn't even have done the ankle thing.

It's a haircut. Let's do a few more of my riddles and then we'll see where we're at. I'm gonna give you three things and you have to tell me what they have in common. For example, rock band, chess piece, and Elizabeth. We'd all have this in common. There are so many.

Queen.

Another word. Queen. That's right. So with that in mind, how about tissue, top, and shoe? Tissue.

Box.

That's correct. It's box. Wow. How about wrist, dog, and man? Wrist, dog, and man.

Watch.

That's correct.

Y'all, I am. My brain is burning. Somebody's taking me to the hospital.

It's the most riddles I've ever gotten.

Who watches the watch?

First watch. Fiber, wine, ceiling.

Fiber, wine, ceiling? Sounds like my Saturday night. Glass? It is glass. Erin!

This is the most riddles I've ever gotten in an episode.

I'm not even kidding. You've frozen through these. You must really run out of this room.

I'm still sitting here going, watch, man, like.

Hearts, even, and bread.

And this is unleavened.

This is, uh, let's associate it with the word, but also it's like an action or a phrase. Hearts, even, bread.

Rise. Beep.

They're all things that are all things you. Hearts, even, bread. All things you want to get the fuck out of a medium. Well, I was gonna say all things that make me horny, but archers works as well. How about gears? How about gears, keyboards, and sands? All things that, yes. Gears, keyboards, and sand.

Days of our lives. Hours.

These are all characters from days of our lives. No. Play. These are all things that blank. Gears.

Wind, turn, grind.

I was gonna say grind.

Oh, these are all things that Casio. Think of a button on a keyboard.

I'm like, escape, they enter, space, shift.

These are all things that shift.

Wow.

Espresso, HPV, and buck.

These are all things you can remember without even knowing.

What?

What did you say? Huh?

What's going on?

Don't talk to me till I've had my HPV.

Oh God. Can you read them again? I wasn't even listening.

Waking up on a Sunday morning. Yeah.

Best part of waking up is... What you have after a long weekend?

Vacation?

The clues were espresso, HPV, and butter. There are things you get after you grind.

Yeah, okay, she got it. PG got it. Adal, she got it. Count it. Point goes to PG.

I mean, Shox was the answer I had, but PG had a better answer, so yes, PG gets that right. Here we go, three more. And then we'll see what happens.

The prodigal son... And then we'll see what happens. Do you have an ending for this pick, John? I don't know, man.

I'm a pig.

Okay, alright, that's fine, that's fine. Sure, yeah, you're a pig.

The prodigal son, a boomerang, an echo.

These are all things that come back in a cave. I guess we could just say return.

A ball.

We're free.

We've all chewed off our feet.

We have no more ankles.

We're all buying into the concept that a pig wearing armor is the one keeping us here, even though we absolutely know it's Adal. In case you just added a voice effect, not even, it's all in post, like we can hear your voice Adal, you know that, right?

Fine, in case you turn off the voice. Modulator.

No, don't make my voice higher. Come on, man. Knock it off.

Hey, it's me.

Hey, it's me, Adal Rifai. I'm here. It's been me the whole time.

Come on, Casey. It's me, Noodle Rifai. It's Adal. Adal. Adal. I just, I've always wanted to play a pig in armor and I didn't have the time to get the outfit so I just kind of used my voice and hopefully. Hey, we get it. PG, thank you so much for doing this. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry about your ankles. I'm sorry about your ankles. I think they grow back, right? Don't you, we have your baby ankles and then you leave those on your pillow, et cetera, et cetera, and then you get your adult ankles.

Yes. I'm sorry about the pig jaw that's on the floor. I feel like that should have been a warning to you, actually.

That's my jaw. Yeah, that's my jaw. Well, you guys are free to go whenever you like. But before you do, I guess PG, I am a big fan of Reality Escape Pod. I recently listened to your Phantom Peak episode, the interview there, so I highly recommend everyone check it out. I think our audience would, there's a lot of crossover there. People would really love to hear about immersive events, experiences, and escape rooms. Can you tell us a little bit more about Reality Escape Pod?

Yes, absolutely. So we have a podcast where we talk, we interview creators of amazing escape rooms, things like larps, puzzle boxes, anything that is involving immersive gaming. So usually there's a gaming element to it. And we've interviewed people from like Neil Patrick Harris, who created a thing called Box One. It was a really fun game. We had Nick Moran on who was the creator of Phantom Peak, which is a cool immersive theme park in London that Adal went to. Cool. Yeah. And so check that out. That's really cool. And then for our Patreon people, we actually do a special episode called Spoilers Club. And because let me tell you that podcasting about escape rooms It's really difficult because the number one rule of escape rooms is you can't talk about escape rooms, right? The coolest parts of escape rooms you can't really discuss openly because you don't want to spoil anything and so we do a special segment called Spoilers Club for Patreon backers where we talk to the creators of escape rooms and they do recaps and walkthroughs of the entire game so you can relive your favorite moments from iconic classic escape rooms.

Hey Riddle Riddle.

Worked through this room.

Audio only working through an escape room.

Oh, you guys were physically in the escape room just playing it. Yeah. Have you guys ever played like the audio escape rooms?

Yes. Well, no, so we did earlier in the pandemic, we did a... Escape this pod? No, no, I think it was Adal and I did it with, maybe you didn't do it, Erin, but we did like one of the online escape rooms.

That's right. Yes, yes, yes.

Yeah.

Oh, cool. I was going to say you guys should have those guys on from Escape This Podcast. They were actually a guest on our most recent season five that just ended, but Bill and Danny are super, super funny. So you should either go on theirs or have them come on yours or just do both.

Yeah. We've been on I think twice. They're fantastic. Yes. Yeah, they're awesome. I love them. Thank you so much, PG. Anything else you'd like to plug or promote or mention?

No, that's it. I guess our Our convention recon would have probably just ended the weekend before this, but we're going to be doing it every year. This year it was remote. Next year it will be in person. So if you wanted to get together with a group of other escape room loving geeks, It is the best place. We have amazing speakers. It's mostly about being able to hang out in what one of the attendees last year called a safe space where they could just sit and geek out about escape rooms and be around people who just love talking about it. So that's called recon and it will be live in person next year.

Amazing. Do you know where it's going to be held? What city?

I do, but I cannot say. I think they will be announcing it.

So that's an escape room in and of itself. What city is it going to be in?

It will be 11 months from now, so get in line and stay in line. Can people follow a certain social media handle or anything to keep updated on that news?

Yeah, so you can follow me at PG Everywhere, that's P-E-I-H-G-E. You can also follow me at Room Escape Artist, or if you want information on the convention, that is Reality Escape Convention, at Reality Escape Convention.

Amazing. PG, thank you so much again for being here. We truly don't deserve you or your talents. Erin, anything to plug?

I'd say check out Survivor if you haven't yet. I love it. I got re into it over the pandemic and now I haven't missed an episode since and it's great. It's consistently good across all 40 seasons. So give it a shot if you haven't.

Absolutely. JPC?

Hey, I said normally I'll read a review, but the one that I have is way too long. So I did actually want to plug something else. If you are a Patreon subscriber of Hey Riddle Riddle, and we do recommend that you do become a Patreon subscriber of Hey Riddle Riddle, it is actually mandatory now. So we are making it a little bit more. We're going to crack down a little bit and make it mandatory. So just so this is a heads up for everybody. But we have a Discord. And in the Discord, I think Erin has a channel and I have a channel. So if you have something that you wanted to ask Erin or I, there is a channel in the Discord where you can do that. Adal, maybe one day we'll get you a channel on that Discord as well.

Wait, how do I get a channel? Guys, move on, wait up.

Ask Kelly. Yeah, you can't, yeah, just ask him on. But you can't, if you want to check that out, I've been interacting with people on that channel. The Discord is very big and there's a lot of other channels that I just can't keep up with. So there's a JPC channel only that you can get to me in there. And I say that because Most other social media is kind of going away, and I'm kind of going away from social media. When this comes out, if X is still a thing, you gotta get on X, baby. That's the big ticket. No, that's the money maker. Pay your $8 a month over there as well. Make sure you're getting your $8 worth on X. What a terrible idea.

Adal, anything that you want to plug? I just want to plug, you know, sometimes life is tough, sometimes you have a hard week or a hard month, and you just want to be a pig in armor with a backpack. And I just want to plug surrounding yourself with people who will let you be that for I think you'll find that those chains were chocolate. You chewed through your ankles and wrists for nothing. Mine were not.

Mine were not. We weren't gonna eat them straight across like savages. Yes. Thank you. Oh my God.

Thank you.

Yeah, Erin, you say I always eat candy bars like I'm from, uh, what was it?

Jupiter.

Bye forever. Goodbye.

Hey Riddle Riddle.

Hey there, Proms and Jobs. If you like that, you are going to love this week's Patreon. It's another Chachachaching Chatterbox episode. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at Patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the Clue crew for $5 a month, or start your seven-day free trial, or the Review crew for $8 a month. And get those ad-free episodes. See you there!

That was a hate-bound podcast.