Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum podcast.

Happy birthday to you. What? Happy birthday to you.

There must be a mistake by Birthdays of December.

Happy birthday dear Adal.

That's not even how you pronounce my name.

Happy birthday, Adal.

Wow. Applause, applause, applause. Erin, that was fantastic.

I can't believe... Oh no.

I can't believe you jumped out of a cake for that. You are covered in icing.

Adal's not even here. He sent Puzbot and his birthday. Of course he did. He's not going to show up on his 40th birthday to record. Take it, Erin. They didn't say happy birthday. What?

I got to say, if someone's eating a cake, you can't just pop out of it, okay?

This is not a birthday cake. Also, we should get you to the ER because you were in the oven at 450 for three hours.

But I'm delicious.

Hold on, hold on man. Your oven's too hot for cakes. 450 will fuck up a cake.

Am I the only one who knows how to make a cake? Let me taste it. Yep, it's ruined. This is bad. This is bad cake. Hey, thank you two for showing up. I have organized a surprise party for Adal because of course we know today June 1st is his 40th birthday.

Are you okay, Pussbot?

Are you 40 today too? No, my system could hardly handle a number that big.

Oh, good roast on Adal.

I forgot Adal built this robot, so yeah, 40 good number. I thought it was because you were throwing a little accent on it.

I thought you were having trouble saying 40 and not sounding like a Scotsman. Oh, I've never tried an accent. Let me try now. Give me an accent.

Oh, Buzzbot was like, uh, okay, why don't we just start with the beginning? Oh, this is the last. I heard you making. I heard you Scottish. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Um, so Pussbot, you're throwing a surprise party for Adal's 40th birthday.

And that's definitely why I'm here. That's what I've been told to tell you, but in all honesty, it's hard to whisper as a robot. And also in all honesty, Adal knows that you two will be here. He has something planned. Wait a second.

So he has something planned beyond sending you, Pussbot.

Yes. Also, why does it sound so nefarious that he has something planned and he knows that I'll be here? That's sounding a little sketchy.

I cooked myself in the oven for him, and he didn't even show up.

Are those song lyrics?

Maybe. We'll see. I'm actually working on that right now. We'll see.

It sounds like you're almost singing You're So Vain. Anyway, you're supposed to press play on this boombox whenever the two of you are mentally prepared.

That might be 40 minutes from now. Is that okay?

That is apropos for a 40th birthday.

I haven't seen one of these in fucking 10 years. What am I supposed to press? I'm supposed to press?

But you did see a boombox in 2012?

Yeah. I was doing a boobox party. You weren't doing those boobox parties? No. From the iPod commercials?

Oh dang.

Everybody brings a boobox, plugs their headphones into it, and they just dance?

I feel jealous.

You weren't doing those?

No, I didn't have many friends. Alright, let's press play. And... play.

Lordy, lordy, lordy. 40, 40, 40. This dude's old as hell. Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway! Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway!

Based on the age that Adal is turning today. Uncle Adal faces death.

Fuck me, that's so old. Yay! What? A game show? I can win money on Adal's birthday? What? Is it my birthday?

Holy shit, that was either really cool or Adal just kind of saying it. Depending on how it works out with timing, that was very cool.

Good job, Arnie. Welcome, my friends. JBC, Erin, it's so great to see you. Sorry I'm being lowered down on this disc from the ceiling. I just wanted to make some sort of dramatic entrance. I hate you. Don't divorce. Why does Puzbot turn into bugs when you show up?

Yeah, that's my big question, too.

How to answer this. You know about the ancient Egyptian bug, the scarab? Say no more.

I'm familiar.

Oh, Rex Manning day.

Wow. You were born on Rex Manning day?

No, close to. I was born in a little, a little day, a little month, in a little year called June 1st, 1982. June 1st, 1982.

Was that smashing pumpkins?

Yeah. Now, a few little facts about June 1, 1982, or just 1982 in general, some of the hot slang that we kids used was, gag me with a spoon, barf me out, bad, and no duh. Some of the top baby names were Jennifer, Amanda, Sarah, Jason, Michael, Matthew. I, of course, was not named any of those. I was a little foreign freak, baby.

Jason Michael Matthews sounds like a... He sounds like he would be on like Party of Five.

And I thought Party of Five with Jason Michael Matthews.

To celebrate and honor the 40 years that I've been wandering this earth in search of water, I thought to play a version of my game show that I like to play every once in a while. Once in a blue moon. Let me take a sip of this blue moon. Ah, wheat beer.

Now, everything's moving so fast.

Shush, shush, shush. Now, Erin, you said you look forward to winning money. Here's what I'll say. No longer, at 40 years old, having just turned 40 this morning, and not even being awake for it. Um, money no longer concerns me. I feel like I don't want to be obsessed with money. I don't want to have material things. I have so much shit in my house. I want to get rid of a lot of it, actually.

I also think on last episode, you said that you would give Erin $10,000 for something. So, Adal, I gotta say, I'm glad that you're no longer giving out money at the way that you were just spending.

That must be right. That must be right.

Can I say something, JPC? Sure. It is so sad that you're clinging to the past. You're talking about 39-year-old Adal. I don't know what that guy's deal was.

Okay, it's really clear that Adal gambled me all of his money last night.

It's not a gamble if you think they're gonna win. I think I could probably give you what that guy's deal was if you haven't.

If you say fair, then I'll win.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Sure.

Well, I bet on a horse and his name was Funktastic. So Funktastic did not place, but anyway. What does that play on words of? I am no longer concerned with material things. So what I am offering the two of you, the victor of this round of game show, what I'm offering is the winner will get A personal poem that I write myself that I concoct in my mental laboratory. I go into my mind palace and I write you a poem that will be read on a later episode of Hey Riddle Riddle. What a treat! Uh, yeah, I guess I want that. Because time, aren't time and emotion more valuable than money?

Let's see, can I eat a poem?

If you cook it in the oven at 450 in three hours.

Can I use a poem to buy diamonds? I don't think so.

What do I want more? A poem or nothing? God, this is a toss-up. Think it over, think it over. Well, I think I technically, I think I want the poem a little more than I want nothing. Now we're talking, Erin. Because a poem, it's not going to clutter up my space, right? No.

Happy birthday, Adal. I want one of your poems more than nothing.

And I guess, wait, now is the poem, you said the poem is about me or the poem is about, it could just be like whatever you're using it for.

Ooh, can I trade my poem in about me for a mean poem about JPC? Because I'm very interested in that.

You, whoever wins, you will get the opportunity to tell me what the poem will be about.

Yes, yes, okay, I'm very interested in that.

Okay, I like that, I like that. Okay, and it will be read on air, I can't stress that enough.

I did send Adal a real gift by the way. Sorry, I can't stress about that enough. My gift is not letting him write a poem, what?

Erin sent me a real gift, and it came in the mail.

On time! Can you believe it?

And it was a £5,000 box, and I go, what could this box make me?

And I opened it, and it was... A £5,000 box inside of the box?

It was 5,000 British dollars. It was a phenomenal, gorgeous, antique cast iron pineapple that's bookends for my tiki bar. Oh, so that really was about 5,000 pounds. It was about, and I'm not being hyperbolic, it was literally 5,000 pounds.

They're antique.

They're antique. They're beautiful. Erin, thank you so much.

Of course. I look forward to every time I have an excuse to buy you a gift because I love making your bar cooler.

So, Erin, when I moved into my new place, and you asked me for my mailing address for a housewarming gift, and I said, you don't have to do that. And you're like, no, I want to. And I gave you my address, and that was what... I also have a wedding gift for you, but it's not back in stock.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Kind of seems like... This is my 40th birthday game show. You're focusing on petty bullshit. You're right, you're right.

And that's what you want? Hold on.

This is the first round. This is the first round. Although, JPC, I will say, when you got COVID, I said to Sean, should I send JPC an edible arrangement? And he went, no. He has enough on his plate right now.

Now I have to track down the edible arrangement. Shake him down, give him COVID, so you give this to whoever said this.

Fuck. Oh, fuck. Erin? Okay. You just gave me a brilliant idea.

What?

I'm gonna announce it here on the air but don't worry by the time this releases it will be trademarked. I am at 40 years old introducing a new business. I need a side hustle. The new business is called Arranged Edibles. What I do is I buy a bunch of edibles from a dispensary and I arrange them in such a way that's pleasing to the eye optically.

You're gonna kill so many people.

By the way, if you thought Edible arrangements were expensive, just wait until you take fruit in the thing that costs 39 cents and exchange it for edibles.

The things that are full of DHC are so expensive.

This may be a conflict with some of our sponsors, I believe so. Please go to what I have to assume is ArrangeItEdibles.com If not, try .edu. It's like buying a rug.

It's like, oh, these motherfuckers could really just charge whatever they want for this.

This is the real thing I've said in my life. I just want to be rich enough where I can buy an edible arrangement every Sunday.

Just for shits and giggles. And laminate them just so you can have them around the house.

Yeah, I don't want to eat them.

Okay, so it sounds like you both are interested in playing for a poem. So we have our two contestants. And technically every time I order at a restaurant, I am making an edible arrangement.

Oh, I like that.

You're ranging to... Yes, to eat. Yeah, I love that. For sure. I love that. What a positive outlook on life.

What's my character? I can't possibly just be me, right?

You're nice, but you're also a little snarky. Yes. It's like nice with a razor's edge. Okay, so here's going to be the first round of this game show. It's going to be a little bit different from previous game shows, but there are going to be some returning elements. So for this first round, we're going to get to know June 1st, 1982. The time and place that Adal was concocted was... Got it. ... was, uh... Well, actually, you tell me. Where was I born? And don't forget, you can pause in. You have to pause in. Where do we think Adal was born? I've said it multiple times. It's probably something like Posca Quiche, Illinois, or something like that.

He wasn't born in Illinois.

I was born in Alakart, Wyoming. Uh, Erin, you buzzed? You buzzed?

Yeah, you were not born in Illinois.

That is incorrect.

Wait a second. You're just buzzing in to guess where you're not born?

Hi, I thought that would be funny. We're whittling it down.

We're whittling it down. Does anybody want to take... This is for just a little bonus point.

It was Illinois, right? It was Illinois. And the name of the town that you were born in is... Man, you know what? You sounded a bunch... Is it a weird sound of name? Kind of like...

I don't know if it's weird sounding, as weird as any town name is, but I will give you a hint. This is also the birthplace of one Carl Sandberg. Wait, Carl Sandberg, Andy's dad.

SML? Uh-huh.

You were born in Vermont.

You know, it's not Las Vegas, Nevada, because you were there for a while.

JPC, you get a bonus point for knowing where I used to live. Oh, good.

So you weren't there, I know, but you've lived, but you were born in Illinois.

I was born in Illinois. Wait, Erin, we get bonus points for where he used to live. Okay, so it wasn't that apartment on, oh god, now I don't know, it's on the west side of town.

Your place in Logan Square.

Yeah, your place in Logan. Bonus point for Erin. Thank you. Was it, oh, was it the one right next to the old I.O.? Uh, were you born there? Yeah, that was on Sheffield.

You lived in Ohio?

I lived in Columbus, Ohio. Bonus point for Erin. Okay, so you both have two bonus points.

What did you, for a couple years, didn't you live inside that mind of Mancia?

Yes, thank you. That's a good point for JVC. I only repeated the material I heard on the road from lesser-known comedians.

You think rent in my nightmares? You've lived in my nightmares for quite some time.

Minus two points for Erin. Wow.

Why?

Because I mean... I don't know the name of the town, Adal. You're gonna have to give it to me because I just... I know there's like one stoplight. Yes.

There's one stoplight and it's for the horse. Joe, what is it? Two minute mike?

Two minute mike. Well, that's Neponset. That's where I grew up at some point.

But I was born... By the way, I was gonna say Neponset. So that's the one I thought it was.

Okay. JBC, I would have given you one extra point. So I'll write that down. Never would have got that name. I was born in Galesburg. Hey Riddle. I truly don't know. I think it's a pretty good college. Was it rigorous?

Would you say that your parents both graduated from the College of Heart Docs? I see.

I love that.

I really actually do like that. That's for his birthday.

I can be funny and clever too. Just give me a chance.

No, that's a present for Adal's birthday.

Thank you.

Adal, give me a chance.

You shouldn't have. Okay, Erin, I'll give you a chance. Here you go. You have 30 seconds on the clock starting now.

Oh my god, to what? Be clever? Good luck.

I don't know. You wanted the chance. You kept saying give me a chance.

I know, but I need a set up. 25 seconds. Give me something to be clever about.

Okay, here's what I'll say. The Knoxville College mascot was the blue bullets. Alright, blue bullets, Erin. Blue bullets.

30 seconds starts now.

Why are those bullets so sad? You both have three points now, okay, so let's this first well that was the first round We'll say now the second round where we really get into the game show is going to be learning about June 1st 1982 or maybe possibly just 1982 in general

Don't forget, you have to pause in. If you give an answer without pausing in, we have to either move on or maybe the other person will get the point. We'll decide in the moment.

But here's the reason I didn't pause in before because I thought you said, do forget. But don't forget.

Yeah, that was bad. I should have clarified.

You know what? I may have misheard it.

So I'm willing to chalk it up to just youthful indiscretions. Willing to chalk it up. Okay. The first question we're going to ask is what was the number one movie, June 1st of 1982? And you can ask some yesterday. Top Gun. Until you pause in, you can ask yes or no questions.

Okay, so we only get one pause in though, right? Pause. Pause. Question.

You don't have to pause in for asking questions. Okay. So you guys are going to deduce it between the two of you asking questions. Sure. You don't have to pause in for those, but when you give an answer, you do have to pause in.

And we only can give one answer and then we're done.

Uh, I wouldn't say that.

No, I don't need to ask questions. I just need to pause, pause. I say pause, I say true lies. Uh, wow. No.

David, way off. Way off. Is this a good movie? Um... Well, that's a question. So, no, I don't have to pause.

I think it's a good movie.

Uh, okay. Um... Is it an action movie? That's a good question.

Um, I guess technically... Kind of. Yeah, I think it's an action movie.

Is it Rocky?

Erin, you are burning hot.

I know that where to go from there.

Is it Rambo? Is it Rambo? Colder. Much colder. Oh, wow. Okay, so Erin burning hot with Rocky.

Okay, what is other movies that he was in?

This is the number one movie, May 1st, 1982. Another movie overtook it that week, but on June 1st, this was still the number one movie.

Huh.

Okay. What other movies was he in?

Who? Well, Rambo, but remember Rambo is cold and Rocky is burning hot. Pause. Yes. Was it Rocky II? Even hotter. We are in the precipice of- Was it Rocky III? Erin, it was Rocky III. I don't deserve that point. Wow. Wow. Erin, that's actually really good.

I was desperately trying to get away from Rocky. I was like, what's action without being action? Was Rocky 79?

I thought, yeah. Rocky, I think it was 79. So right before... That's quick for those sequels. So in 1982, the number one movie for a while was Porky's. Don't watch that movie. It does not hold up. Then it was Conan the Barbarian starring True Lies, a superstar or a Schwarzenegger. Then it was Rocky III.

True Lies was a great guess.

Then it was Rocky III during my birthday. And then later that week in my birthday, what overtook it is Star Trek II, The Wrath of Khan. With Benedict Cumberfish. With Benedict Cumberbitch. And then right after Wrath of Khan became one of the biggest grossing movies of all time that dominated the full year, which was E.T., the extra-terrestrial.

That came out in 82, huh? I didn't know that. I would have had no idea.

Me and E.T. What do we think, this is the next question, what do we think the number one song, June 1st of 1982 was?

The song from Rocky.

The, yeah, from Rocky III.

I Have the Tiger.

I Have the Tiger.

It's probably that one that was like... Heart of Glass by Blondin.

Erin, if you ever make a game show, it should be JBC and I trying to guess you mumbling lyrics because I feel like that's your brand is like, Oh my gosh, my mom and dad were here this week and I know who I got mumbling lyrics from.

That's amazing. It's probably, you know, just... It's probably that one. Not quite ready to pause and lock that one in, but it was probably that. I have a question for you. Was Loverboy involved in this song at all?

Loverboy was not involved. And Erin, I know your next question. And yes, audio was made in 1982. Oh, I'm hilarious.

Thank you.

This wasn't pre-audio.

Pre-audio can still get you pregnant.

Aha, take on me. No, it was not. Was it a male singer? I don't know how to fully answer this, but I will say, since we're going yes or no, I will say yes. Okay. But there's an asterisk.

Is it a duet? It is a duet, yes. Fuck me up inside. Okay, this is evanescence.

You are surprisingly close with that answer in a weird way.

Okay, so what way would Evanescence be?

Okay, so Evanescence is... Here's what I'll say, JPC on paper, you're close, but that's the only way.

Okay, so like Everlast, Everclear, Ever... There's like Eva, Eva... Eva... Oh boy.

I can't think of a single duet from the 80s, am I okay?

Oh, was this a duet with Evil Knievel?

His motorcycle? Yeah, that was... Evil Knievel and his motorcycle did a duet of Dave Matthews Crash.

Yeah.

Oh, that's a good one, Erin.

Is that a duet? I don't know. I don't think so.

I'm trying to think of other songs from the 80s. Can we get a hit? Can we have one of the two people who was involved in this song? No, because that would give it away.

Oh, is it Sonny and Cher's? I got you, babe. No. Buck. And feel free, again, really lay on those yes or no questions. I feel like we could really whittle it down. Is it a good song?

It is a good song. Is the genre like, I want to say classic rock? No. Is the genre like a ballad, or not even genre, but is this like a ballad song? Ballad-ish. Okay. Ballad-esque. Is this a Billy Idol song? We got Billy Idol in this? No, no, no.

Is it like someone who's not normally on the charts?

Um, no, this is, both people are top, are chart legends.

And it's a man and a woman. It's a man and a woman.

No.

Oh, two women.

Two men. No, one's a man. Two men. Yes. Is this an air supply song? No, I said these are chart legends. I do want to see a song.

Air supply not chart legends?

I gotta say, before you say anything else, Billie Idol, Billie Eilish. Have they done a duet together yet? Because we gotta get into the history of books before it's too late.

Well, we already have a Billie Idol, Miley Cyrus duet.

Yeah, but her name's not Billie, is it?

Hey Riddle Riddle. The song you write will become very well known. It is an actual song that exists in our world that we like or we at least make fun of. Got it. But this is the origin story of that song with these two in the studio.

Alright, cocaine done. Sandwich ate.

Okay, here's my vibe. I don't think what we're doing, sexual enough, yeah? Okay. I think in the song, I think, you know, you do the song and you sing what you're gonna sing, I think, you know, A, I'm on the guitar, I'm supposed to be playing on the guitar, I think what I do is I do like, ugh, and ugh, and ah, yeah. And ugh, and ugh. I feel like that will be my contribution to the song. And what should my contribution be? Just sing it, just sing it normally, sing a big, nice bass line, you do the song as written, and I'm like, ugh, but ah.

Bonus point to JPC.

What if I just go like a bee boo doo boop? A bee boo doo deep?

Bonus point to Erin.

I'm gonna battle, supernattle. What if I do some of those? I don't hate that.

I don't hate that. I do think I'll want to do a few of those as well. If we're doing... You want to do some... Beep boop.

Beep doo. Beep.

I think we should both have equal representation in the song. So whatever you do, I will also get to do my own version.

So if I do this with my guitar, meow, that means... That's my guitar.

Same. Very nice job. So just for anybody who doesn't know, and because this might help you along the way, what song were you creating? Clearly you were Mick Jagger and David Bowie creating the song. Under pressure by Queen. Under pressure by Queen. So this is Jagger and Bowie?

No, no, no.

I thought you two were playing Jagger and Bowie. I will say, here's a hint. It is two men. It's a duet with two men. One is American, one is not.

Okay, so let's go with... What else is there besides America? Not this again. Two points for Maren. No!

Is the other a Brit? The other is a Brit.

Alright, so we got Bowie, we got Jagger, we got... Who else are the Brits of the 80s? God, these are big time chart toppers.

Yeah. Did VH1 ever do a Brits of the 80s show?

Hey Riddle.

Oh, which is a Simon and Garfunkel song!

No. Oh. Simon Cowell. No. Paul Simon. You're 50% there. So it's Paul. Yeah. Paul Somebody. Yeah. Paul McRiser. Paul McR- It is Paul Riser and Helen Hunt.

I got it. It is Mad About You.

It is Mad About You.

Paul McCartney and then an American guy sang a duet.

Yes. Mm-hmm. The day I was born, and I think I was born at like three something in the morning, my mom claims, but the day I was born, this was the number one song. It was Paul McCartney and it is not, to my knowledge, it's not a remix. It's definitely been done several times, but I think I'm almost positive this is the original, but I think it has been done since.

Yeah, Erin said Wings. Was it a Wings song? It is not.

No, Wings was a duet with him and Linda McCarthy. This was probably during the Wings era, but it was Paul and someone else. Interesting. I think you both know this song. Steven Tyler. You're halfway there. Oh. Steven. Steven? Yeah. Well, a version of Steven. Steve. Closer.

Closer but not correct.

Steven Steve Steve.

Stevie Wonder?

Yeah, there you go.

Are you saying a song together?

Yes.

Am I, am I?

Maybe you don't know the song. Puzz it if you know it. I will say Puzz and I will say, no, wait, they didn't say Ebony and Ivory, did they? Yes, JBC you got it, it's Ebony and Ivory by Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder. That was McCartney?

I don't know why I didn't, I don't associate that song with Paul McCartney at all.

There was a whole run where Paul McCartney was doing duets with people and it was like him and Stevie Winter did Ebony in the Ivory, him and Michael Jackson did The Girl is Mine. It was just like a whole, I guess it just those two.

I do. The only way I know Ebony and Ivory was I think from an old SNL sketch that I'm going into the lyrics in my head now and it doesn't age well but it wasn't meant to at the time and I don't know that oh it was it was Stevie Wonder I think it was like a thing where Stevie Wonder was doing Ebony and Ivory with a bunch of other people that weren't Paul McCartney and it was just like circling through and showing you what that song would have sounded like with other people you know how SNL does those sketches that are just impression vehicles for other people.

Well they did yeah they did an SNL where Joe Piscopo played Frank Sinatra And then Eddie Murphy with Stevie Wonder, and they sang this song.

That is exactly the one that I'm thinking of, because I'm thinking of the Joe Piscum of Frank Sinatra. And again, I don't think it ages well. Don't look for it.

Don't look for it. I can't remember the sketch, but I don't remember what they say, but it probably doesn't hold up.

He is, uh, I don't remember exactly what they say. I can sing a little bit because it's burned into my brain.

No, no, no, no, no. Um, J.P.C., you currently stand at five points. Erin, you currently stand at six points. I'm sitting. Okay, we're gonna take a break soon, but before we do, we're gonna do one more, um, one more from this round of June 1st, 1982. What do we think? I want you to name two, uh, at least two of the top TV shows during the week of June 1st, 1982. Now, there are maybe, I have a list of eight here that were in the top. I want to hear at least two of them. JPC.

Oh no, that makes it so I should definitely be getting one.

The news and sports.

Yeah, you did it!

Here's what I'll say. Legally, I have to give this to you because the number one program by far was 60 Minutes, which is the news.

Hell yeah.

And then in the top five was Monday Night Football.

Are you ready for some sports?

So JPC, I am giving you a point for that. Erin, if you would also like a point, if you can give me... I'll give you two points, Erin. If you can give me two by name shows of two of the top shows from that time. And Erin, I am here to help you, so if you need me as a resource... You're no help, Mr. Sports and News. And I'll give you, Erin, I'll give you... Well, I'll say we have a minute until break. You have one minute to name two of the top shows from June 1st, 1982. And I'll tell you, one of them is probably exactly what you think it is.

I... Yeah, I... Full House.

Wow. Wow.

It's a joke.

That's a joke. Hold on. You don't get to make a guess and then say it's a joke. Star Ski and Touch. Uh, no. You have 55 minutes... 55 minutes. You have 55 seconds remaining.

Growing Pains.

No, you have 50 seconds remaining. I'm gonna guess like Young and the Restless. Wasn't that on that thing? Days of Our Lives. Cheers, I think debuted in 82, but it's not on this list so it wasn't a hit yet. Um, GPC there is, there is a soap opera-esque show on here, but it's, actually there's two that are very soap-ish, but they're not like daytime soaps.

They were, like, facts of life.

Somebody just said one of them. Yes, Dallas was one. And then I can't stress enough. There's one show that I, both of you absolutely know, and it was like the biggest deal.

And, uh, I guess Golden Girls.

No. This is a show every eyeball in America was on and... Oh, MASH. MASH.

MASH.

So I'll give you each one point since GBC got Dallas and Erin I'll give you a point for MASH. The other top shows were Three's Company, Simon and Simon which I've never heard of, Falcon Crest I've never heard of, and The Love Boat. Whoa, Love Boat. Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Erin, I'll give you one extra point if taking us to break you will sing the Love Boat theme song.

It's the love boat on a boat and falling in love. It's the love boat. Oh, no, we capsized and we're on an island. Love boat, love on a boat. Love boat.

One point to JPC?

No, no, no.

Honey, I was just watching the love boat's intro theme. You know the boat sank.

It sank of the intro.

I can't believe I was I know what you're thinking. Do I have a new hat, Adal and JPC? New haircut? Why am I walking around with so much confidence?

I bet you're wondering. I wanted pretzels from the food court.

And I was just going to let you know that it looks like you leaned on paint.

Anyways, I just had a bunch of subscriptions canceled for me by Rocket Money that I wasn't using. And so now I'm flushed with cash and now I'm confident. Pretzel money? Well, maybe. We'll talk about that. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place. I've been using it for years, even before they were a sponsor.

Erin, it looks like you may have leaned on like with someone painting a rocket money like billboard or sign or something because it's all it's all down your back it's like and it's I could ock it ock it

People think they're spending $80 on their subscriptions when in reality, the number is closer to $200. And when you signed up for so many free trials, like streaming services, you watch one show and then you completely forget about it. You lose track and then all of a sudden you're like, why am I bleeding money? Rocket money? They take care of that for you. They go, sit back, relax. We got this. And they make everything color coded and easy and super intuitive.

You're also color-coded. A little birdie told me that Rocket Money also lets you monitor all your expenses in one place, recommends custom budgets based on your past spending, and they'll even send you notifications when you've reached your spending limits, which sounds like something my friend would like, but I forget which friend I'm so hungry for pretzels.

Speaking of pretzels, you don't get all twisted up by salty and the bread of your finances. With over 3 million users and counting, Rocket Money customers have saved an average of $720 a year.

Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and manage your money the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash riddle. That's rocketmoney.com slash riddle. rocketmoney.com slash r-i-d-d-l-e.

Hey, what's going on? Somebody leaned over my rocket money painting. Run. Everybody run. Run. Oh no. Maroon.

Is that DaVinci?

Yeah. Yes.

And bye.

Welcome back, everyone. Of course, we are playing the very special 40th birthday game show.

Lordy, lordy, lordy. 40, 40, 40. This dude's old as hell. Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway! Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway!

Based on the age that Adal is turning today.

Uncle Adal faces death.

Fuck me, that's so old.

We're into our next round, okay? Yeah. And before we get into the next round, I do want to present, because I feel like based on Erin's tremendous Love Boat song, I do want to see a quick scene. This will be fairly quick. And I do want to see a scene of two people on a boat that is sinking and they're in love. Oh, OK. So this is based on the Love Boat theme you sang, Erin. Two people in love on a boat that's sinking.

No, you sink first.

Point for her.

I think that the rules are women and children.

Don't.

First.

No, you think first.

No, no, no, no. Look, we all know, I love going down first. And I do not mind. And I do not mind.

Well, you know that I don't mind getting wet. Disgusting.

Scene. Perfect scene, no notes.

I have some notes.

Okay, so for this next round... I agree with Erin.

I find being sexual in any sense completely disgusting. I think if you're listening to this podcast and you're out there trying to have sex, here's what you should do. Go shove your freaking genitals in a drawer because you don't need them and I don't like you using them.

Open the freezer door and let the air hit your face. Snap out of it, you pervert.

Go read a book, you little sicko. I'm trying to hump everything that moves you little perv ass. Quick going in the hot tub to saddle up to that jet. Funny little nerd. Here's what you do. Go to the microwave, open that door, set it for 99 minutes, and just stand in front of it. You sicko.

Sicko.

That'll treat your sperm.

I'm

Chocolate and vanilla swirls.

You got sperm in my egg. You got egg in my sperm. Reese's.

Actually a baby.

That would just be a baby.

I would love it if my sperm had cheesecake mix in.

Ew! Ew!

My balls have a brownie better.

I've never eaten cheesecake. Don't ruin dessert for people. People are nice.

Doctor, should my semen have sprinkles? Stop it. Alright, alright. That's an impression of what you sound like, you little sicko perms out there trying to help it up sex. Grow up.

That's what you sound like. Okay, next round. So we're moving past June 1st, 1982, and we're getting to just sit to me, Adal Rifai, this old dumb dumb. So what's going to happen first is, and don't forget, you have to puss in. I want somebody to puss in and spell my middle name.

Oh, I know this. Oh, I won't be able to do it correctly.

Spelling it correctly is going to be hard. Okay, fuck. I know it's the Lion from, or the monkey from Lion King. I just don't know how to spell that. Adal Rifai, yeah. Well, don't tell Erin. Okay. Spelling Adal's middle name. We can ask questions though, right?

No.

Okay, this is like a new rule where we can't answer yes or no questions anymore.

I would love a spelling bee where you can ask yes or no questions. Does it end in an E? No?

Okay, I got it. Does it spell the way it sounds?

Okay, how about you just pause and correctly say my middle name? Wow, telling.

Can I tell you that it's written on a note in my phone? Can I...

Yeah. I think you just have to take a stab at it. We're pronouncing it. We've moved on from spelling to pronouncing it. We just had Adal's wedding and I don't think it was ever said.

It was screamed several times. I asked the guy, I was like, I was like, Hey, let me see that. What are you writing down? Let me see that. Let me see that. I'll give you a hint. I know I know it. This is my dad's name. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, uh, pause. Yeah. Is it B-A-S-T-A-R-D?

Playing for JVC.

Okay.

That's funny. But that is incorrect.

Okay. Not right. That's not right. Man, your dad's name, by the way, is on the tip of my tongue. Why?

It always is. I'm going to give 10 more seconds and then we're scrapping this round and moving on.

Adal's dad's name. He says, hey, this is my dad. His name is, and I say, oh, it's nice to meet you. And then I shake his hand. I can call people Mr. First Name. Mr. Aaron, Mr. Adal, nice to meet you both. Oh, does it start with an N? Nope. Then I don't know it. It's not normal?

Does it start with a K?

There's a K in it, but not at the beginning. Aaron, you said you have it written in your phone?

I do. I have your... I have a... You know what? Don't ask me questions about my nose.

And you have my middle name starting as a K?

Puss. No, no, no. I don't have it. I didn't know it yet.

Is it Jacko? I know that's his nickname. Adal Jacko Rifai.

I know that's his nickname. It doesn't begin with an A. It doesn't begin with an A.

Okay, so we're going to go into our speed round to just move on from here and I'm just going to start to spell it and you pause it if you think you know it.

Got it.

It starts with an S. Pause. Yes. Sacco. Nope. Did it. Next letter H. Ooh, pause. Next letter, yes. Shonda? No, closer. Next letter, A. S-H-A.

S-H-A-K.

No.

Uh, uh, pause.

Yes. Shannon. No.

Next letter W. Shannon's a great name by the way.

Next letter W. Ah, S-H-A-W.

Uh, pause. Yes. Uh, Shaka, L-E. Very close. Next letter K. Shaka. Pause, Shaka. Pretty close. Last letter I. Last letter I. I give up.

S-H-A-W-K-I. Shoki.

Now I thought Shoki was a town in Illinois that you lived in. That's Kiwani. Damn it. Now yes, my full name is Adal Shoki Rifai. Now you know.

I thought it was Adal Shoney's Rifai. Make those fake credit cards, everybody! Off you go!

No, wait! And you have my birthday. Okay, here's the next quiz. Make and model of the first card. What are my mom's maiden name? I'll tell you. Fuck, and they also know what city my parents met and shit.

Wow. I'm fucked. You're fucked, man. You're fucked.

Dude, they're gonna be able to guess all your password.

Okay, this is bad. We'll bleep out one of these. We'll bleep out Rocky III. Gotcha. Okay, I'm going to give you, this will be one where you kind of create on your own and then get back to me. So I'm going to give a word a one, I'm going to word two points for whoever can come up with the best acronym or maybe you might call it an acrostic because acronym is whatever, I don't know, we'll say acrostic or acronym for my first name. So using Adal, you're going to come up with a phrase or a sentence or whatever you want. An initialism, if you will. An initialism, thank you. Okay. Where each letter is going to stand for a different word.

And we have to use your middle name and your last name as well?

Nope, just first name.

Thank God, because I don't remember that middle name.

So Adal, we'll cut out whatever time you work on it. We only get one? You can come up with a couple.

Okay.

So I'll give you, I don't know, a minute or so. And then we'll pick it up from there.

Maybe a minute. I got one. I got one.

JVC's loaded.

So we've got, this is Adal. Against diarrhea. Against indigestion.

You think my name is spelled A-D-A-I?

Yeah, I guess so. I mean, I didn't have one for El, so I really wanted to make indigestion work. I was really hoping that you'd let that one go. I got lost in diarrhea there.

JPC, just plain ozone.

Okay, I'm still thinking. I'm writing it down.

Oh, Adal. Yes. After Lardi. Where can you find Adal? He's at the After Lardi, baby. Lottie Lottie. We likes to party. Okay.

Erin, this better be perfect.

Okay. Agent dumbass angering lunatics. Okay. That technically is a point, but I hate it. Wow. Okay. I don't know. We're going to be judging these.

All right. I'm going to do it.

Please, Erin.

A dazzling ageless legend.

You use A?

Yeah, as A. A is A? Shut up!

Sorry, I have to recover from how beautiful that was. Erin, you get two points. You win that.

I'm just really self-conscious that you guys both know I have a note in my phone dedicated to just facts about both of you.

Interesting. You're keeping tabs, literally. JBC, you get a point for coming up. You had the most. You had the biggest volume. Some of them were a little incorrect in terms of the spelling, or by the way... Adam Driver ate lasagna.

Well, now I want to give you another point. I'll never forget Adal's name again.

That's... I wish I had come up with that. Come on!

Come on! You almost remember Adal. Adam Driver ate lasagna. But, Erin, by far you came up with the best one. That was fantastic. Thank you for that compliment. I hope you meant it.

Of course. I do. Of course I mean it. You think I don't like you? Would I be here if I hated you? What are you talking about?

I meant the thing about the lunatic. Okay. Now, now you have no time. Thank you. Now you have no time to prepare. This just has to be instantaneous and I'll call on one of you to go first. Oh, please. I'm going to give one point to whoever does the best Adal impression.

Erin, go ahead and go first. I'm so sorry that you got my order wrong. I did it.

I like that I'm always being hit in the stomach.

And I'm Adal Rifai.

Great. Thank you, Erin. Oh yeah, baby.

Two buttholes. That is for sure for Connor. JPC, it is now your turn.

Oh, I apologize. No, it's my fault. I'm so sorry. I never meant to touch your face in a way that you didn't want your face to be touched. I was under the impression that I was vacationing in the Poconos.

I'm

Okay, we're moving on to the next portion of the game show. This is going to be an Adal Parade. Now we're all familiar with a fantastic segment called Animal Parade. This is going to be a slight mutation of it in terms of this is called Adal Parade. Everything we see will be some version of Adal doing something. We'll still have the beat, the same beat we always do. And of course, no article following, no article about Adal because the whole segment is just the song. I could find an article about Adal. Does either of you remember my favorite number? 33 maybe? 33. So JBC you can decide if you want to go first or second. You will alternate so you will be going continuously until I say stop but you would be either starting or going second.

Huh? Okay, I'll go second then. I'll go second.

So Erin, you're gonna be starting off the parade. The two of you will alternate and we'll probably go for about 30 seconds or so, but I'll call time when I feel like we're done with this. Whenever the two of you are ready. And here, I'll give the rhythm. Gotcha. The two of you don't have to worry about it. An Adal with the backpack.

An Adal with a flannel on.

An Adal eating a fancy meal.

An Adal flying standby. An Adal buying you a book.

An Adal up at 4 a.m.

An Adal picking up the check. An Adal on a Gemma's arm.

Guys, my whole life just flashed before my eyes.

Are you scared? You look scared.

I'm scared. That was fantastic. Adal, your whole life just flashed in front of your eyes and I have an article here. This is an article from NPR from December 25th, 2009 titled, His Life All Wrapped Up. Uh oh. Adal Rifai sits in his friend Louis Saunders' apartment in Chicago after wrapping Saunders' belongings while he was out of town. It took 16 people, 35 rolls of wrapping paper, and 8 hours to finish the job. This Christmas, Louis Saunders has lots of unwrapping to do, but the gifts aren't exactly new. After Saunders gave him a spare key, Adal Rifai gathered members of his improv troupe to wrap every single item in Saunders' apartment. His clothes, the bath mat, even a beer in his fridge. The elaborate prank took 8 hours and required 35 rolls of wrapping paper and 16 comedians turned wrappers. Most of his apartment is still not yet unwrapped, but Saunders says everything he unwraps turns out to be just what he wanted. Adal, I gotta ask you. All that trash that ended up killing the turtles. Is that correct?

That got caught in our nostrils.

I can Google Adal too. Magic Tavern is the funniest fantasy podcast.

Eh, let's not read that one. Let's not read that one. Come on. Come on, Erin. What are you doing? I will say, so I went viral for doing a prank, like JBC said, where I wrapped my friend's entire apartment. We were on the news a bunch, we were on all kinds of, like, Japan was calling us, it was very wild. Here's what I'll say, the funniest part of everything.

The country?

Yes. I have a key to the city. The band. I have a key to the country. The city. The country. So, it was on a ton of news stations and all these different shows and stuff. There was a news channel, I forget one, it was like a bigger, we were on like Good Morning America, but there was another one that was similar, where they showed a clip of the video we took of showing Louis' apartment being wrapped, and they were talking about everything that happened. And at the end of it, they said, and when they were done, they threw all that wrapping paper away. And we got, there were so many comments on the YouTube video where people were like, disgusting that you wouldn't recycle, da da da da da. And here's the thing, we did recycle the paper. We either undid it and use it to wrap presents that Christmas or Louis recycled it.

That's not what I read.

The news just said what they wanted to say which was a big lesson in life for me where I'm like oh the news just says whatever they want and then people take it as fact but we were so many people in the comments got super upset. So I do want to see a scene. I do want to see a scene. The two of you are news anchors on a popular news show. You've been anchors for quite some time and you are just kind of, you're at a point in your career where you're so established and so well loved and you're such local celebrities, you just say whatever the fuck you want and report it as news.

Hello and welcome to the 6 p.m. news. I'm Jennifer Noodles.

I'm Dusty Flynnigan, and this is the 6 p.m. news. Jennifer has our top story tonight.

Thank you. Tonight, we have some bad news coming in from Washington, D.C. They're all itchy right now. This is breaking news, so it'll be coming into you slowly throughout the hour, but it's just a port that everyone's a little bit itchy over there in Washington, D.C. Over to you.

Thank you, and now it's time for a segment we call Dusty's Corner. This is a corner where I tap into— This is a Dusty's Corner! Thank you. Where I tap into my investigative journalism roots this week on Dusty's Corner. Are waffles getting too expensive? I did an investigation at my local Cracker Barrel, and it turns out— What'd you find, Dusty? I mean, nine dollars. For waffles? Come on. This is too much.

Thank you, Dougie.

So Cracker Peril, it's on you to fix this. Next time I come in, I'd better be eating $6 waffles.

And let's go over to Gio with sports. Now this season I want the Dodgers to take it all.

Hey Gio, we gotta take it. We have to throw it over to you. You may get full attention.

You may want to go over to sports. We've talked about it, Gio.

We'll throw it to you. We're going to Tilly with weather, Tilly. Hi, I'm Tilly, and it's really cold over in this part of the studio. Over to you for sports.

Thank you, Tilly. Gio with sports.

Now, let's see. No, Tilly, you can't throw to Gio. I can't! You can throw back to us, and we can throw to Gio.

Well, back to you!

No, I don't want it. I don't want it.

I don't want it either.

All right, Gio, you can take it. See. Two points for each of you for that.

Thank you, Adal.

What's the current score?

What is a quarant score?

Quarant score is 18 to 18.

Fuck!

You two of you are tied, uh... I'm so scared.

I'm not gonna win, Adal.

The two of you are tide pods. Okay.

Adal, am I really a tide pod? Drink me! Drink me!

Remember? Oh yeah, this will make me smaller. Or bigger. I forget. Or sick. Those are the three things food could make you smaller, bigger, or sick. Here's my plan. I want to rewrite Alice in Wonderland, but I want to make her have severe allergies.

Oh, so it's me. One food makes you smaller or bigger or sick.

And the cookies mother gives you put you in the yard for a week. Right, I'm weak with sick. That's always good. Yeah, that works. You made it work. That's always good. Okay, we are at I believe the final round. Oh, okay. What final round? And the final round for every game show I believe has been consistent throughout. Yeah.

Oh no.

So of course, the final round for... Lordy, Lordy, Lordy.

40, 40, 40. This dude's old as hell. Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway! Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway!

Based on the age that Adal is turning today. Uncle Adal faces death.

Fuck me, that's so old.

The final round is going to be Rap for Daddy.

And this is the one where we can wager any amount of points, correct?

Now, Erin, what?

You can now. You can now. I'd love to wager all of Erin's points.

No! All of Erin's points.

I'd like to wager all of GBC's points. No!

I want to wager all of Erin's points against Erin. Now, Erin, historically... Erin historically what? This is a segment that has not been kind to you.

It really... Is that true?

Well, here's what I'll say. It's led to some of my favorite moments ever from the show, but I think in terms of the way you feel about it, I know that rapping makes you nervous. I know rhyming makes you sick.

I know beats... For your birthday, I'll get sick on rhymes.

But I told you, Adal, that busting makes me feel good, yet you never bring it up. You always talk about Erin's thing.

Bustin' Rhymes makes you feel good, Busta Rhymes. So you're both gonna rap. The category is gonna be Adal for both of you. Okay. So last time we said... Oh, I asked my favorite number and you said 33. Do either of you know one of my favorite pizza toppings? I have two favorite pizza toppings. Do either of you know... Pineapple.

Shrimp po' boys.

I do like shrimp po' boys.

You like peppers. You like green peppers.

Uh, close. You like banana peppers, my man. I do, but that's not one of my top two. Fuck off, man. You like the banana peppers. You know you do. I do like, Erin, I'm going to go with pineapple because there was a few years ago I was getting green olives and artichoke hearts for my two feet. But there was a time when I was doing pineapple and green olives, so I'll give that to Erin. So Erin, you can either go first or second for the rep for

I'd like to go second.

Interesting choice, I'm an interesting player. Interesting you saw that coming a mile away. So, JPC, whenever you are ready, you're going to rap for daddy.

Okay, and I assume that we have prepped the backing track.

Yes, I have.

Okay, great. Thank you, Casey. Okay, whenever you're ready, Casey.

Here we go. This is JPC's rap for daddy, Ady.

Whoa.

Yo, his name is Adal. You spell that A-D-A-I. That's right. He's up in the sky because he can fly. With the best of them, put the shrimp on the sandwich. Po-boy pimp. He likes to eat it when he's in New Orleans. Uh-oh. What's he, Dorlands? He's going door to door with a smile, knocking on the door, saying, stay a while. My name's Adal. Can I apologize to you? Can I buy you a gift that's true? And he can. You know that he can. Adal. He's the gift by a man. Thank you so much, Casey. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Incre bleh. That was fantastic. JBC, I want to say that's going to be impossible, almost impossible to beat. Erin, are you ready? I think so.

I think so too.

Now Adal, I got something to slip. Are you familiar with the movie The Wedding Singer? Oh, yes. So there's an old woman in The Wedding Singer who is training for months because her husband, her having the big anniversary and she wants to sing her husband a song. Erin knew what was going to happen. She knew what was coming up your birthday. And around December of last year, she reached out to me and she said, JPC, I'd love to take some rapping lessons. And I said, Erin, I would love to give them to you. We have been working weekly on rapping lessons since December. For this rap Erin's about to do? That is six months of rapping lessons. And Erin is about to take it to the streets. So Casey, please drop the beats.

Talking about my friend, Adal Rifai. If you see him on the street, make sure you say hi. If you need a ride, he'll take you super far. He wouldn't want to stop at a tiki bar. The best part of his freaky little life is a beautiful new awesome wife. If he's your friend, don't be scared, because he'll be your friend at the very end. If he's your friend, don't be scared.

Adal. Adal Rifai. Adal, Adal, Adal, Adal.

I think it's funny that I said, please your friend don't be scared. That's it!

Yay! Amazing. That was amazing!

I worked for months, right JPC?

Hey Riddle.

Although I'll say, I will say, Erin, I think that's par for the course, in terms of my whole life I've had very severe eyebrows, and so a lot of people, I guess up until they get to know me, are like scared of me, or they think that I'm like mad all the time. Mad-al. Mad-al. So I think that works. I think that works pretty well. One couple every month, that's the same as Shakespeare did.

I don't remember anything I just said.

Hey Riddle.

Oh, the soundboard is back. I didn't just say that. Past me said that.

That's a thousand and one points for Casey, and Casey actually wins.

I think that might be our first visit for the soundboard to a regular episode.

Yeah, the soundboard's been lurking in the Patreon episodes, but now it's crossed over. It's in our world.

It's in our world now.

It's multiverse of madness. So the two of you both won with a thousand points. JPC, you will tell me now, what would you like your poem, your bespoke poem written by me in my forties? What would you like the content or the suggestion to be?

The suggestion for the poem I would say is going to be Long John Silver's menu. I would like a poem at the suggestion as Long John Silver's menu.

I like that a lot.

I can't stress enough that it's right in my wheelhouse.

Thank you. I know. I know, buddy.

I would like a poem about all of my untapped potential. No, I don't want that.

Wow.

No, no, I want a poem about all the books you haven't read in your house yet.

Okay.

Thank you. And Casey, what do you want your poem to be about?

Yeah, because Casey won too at Imperial Victory. Me. Okay.

So Casey says about him. So Casey wants a poem about me? Okay, I guess. So I just put down Casey equals Casey. Well, thank you all so much for playing. I hope you had a good time. I hope I did too. Once again, this has been... Lordy, Lordy, Lordy.

40, 40, 40. This dude's old as hell. Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway! Adal Rifai's Growing Older Giveaway!

Based on the age that Adal is turning today. Uncle Adal faces death.

Fuck me, that's so old.

I do want to give both the contestants any time that they would like to plug. This is the final round is to plug whatever you want to plug. I just want to plug being 40. I feel very good. I'm very happy to be doing this with the two of you. Thank you for indulging me in this endeavor and I'm feeling good and I'm feeling loved and not worrying about money anymore. I'm trying to buy everything in poems.

And I'll see you there, Adal, because I'll be there in a few years and then, Erin. We'll leave the door open for you as well.

We'll leave the light on.

Uh-huh.

Uh, J-Erin, anything to plug?

Yes, I would like to plug being nice to Adal on the internet today. Just like treat nice things to him and be nice to him and just be nice to Adal. Go follow him on Twitter and Instagram. He's a great guy. I hope he lives another 40 years and then 40 years again after that.

Phew, I was gonna say. Wait, you weren't gonna be happy with 80 years?

Happy birthday, Adal.

I'm happy with 120. Thank you, Erin. Davey, is there anything you want to plug?

Look, I know I shouldn't ask for any more, but I think I deserve to live 120 years. Yeah, I like to plug the idea of dying when it's your time. 80 for me, plenty. That's so great. Totally plenty. I'm happy with 80. If I get it, then that's more than enough. No, I've got some reviews to read. These are all five-star reviews, and if you want to get your review featured on the show, all you have to do is go and leave a five-star review on iTunes. Here we go. The first one, it says, it's five stars. This is from Coffee Cavalier. It says, please sir, can I have some more riddles, sir? Psych, I came for the riddles, but I stayed for the improv. The show has a bright spot in all of my week, and if I could have a new episode every day, I would pay all of the money. All of it. Or a poem. I guess I don't think I've read a poem. Here's all the favor and listen to this podcast and then when you fall in love with it, get the Patreon because that's somehow even funnier. It's not somehow, it's on purpose even funnier. Also, shout out to Erin Lief's laugh, big time fan, Erin Lief, L-E-I-F. So not that big of a fan, I guess.

No, that's my real name. I just haven't corrected you guys.

You relate to Lief Erickson, right?

Because that's his first name.

We got another one here. This is five stars from My Name Goes Here question mark. It says, hello, I just wanted both of my co-hosts to know I have an incredibly stinky butt. That is all. It's a five-star review, JPC. You have to read it as per the verbal contract you made. My butt's not stinky. It's the normal amount of stinky that a bunch of me... Well, it is stinky. Here we go. Another five-star. This one comes from DM1681. It says, how dare you? Who do these people think they are making me laugh and brightening my day? How considerate? This is how I consider it. Take your five stars and get out. And the last one comes from Big Kevin Mac. It says,

So thank you, Kevin, for that confusing- Oh, I get to plug it in!

Um, I guess I'd like to plug it- And this is Gio with Sports.

Now today we're gonna have a bit of a- No, Gio, you can't call- you can't have it call all over to yourself. You have to wait for someone to put- uh, throw it to you.

Joke's on you, big Kevin Mac, Erin already did her plug, so your little joke didn't fucking work, did it?

Well, okay, let's toss it over to, I wanna say, Little Samantha with the weather, and uh- Hey, I'm Little Samantha!

Jupiter!

Bye forever!

Happy birthday, Adal!

Thank you!

Be nice to him on the internet today, or you're gonna have to hear it from me.

Just today. You can go back to your house. Little Samantha. Little Samantha.

Hey there rats and swallows, if you like that you are going to love this week's Patreon. It is part three, the thrilling conclusion of our Hey Riddle City inspired superhero series. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalogue at patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew, and you get free episodes for $8 a month. See you there!