Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum podcast.

So, um, how would you like your haircut today? Just a little bit off the side or?

Um, you know what? Why don't we just go ahead and lower my ears?

That's funny.

You're funny. I don't want a haircut. I want all of them cut. Sorry, I'm behind you. I'm behind you.

I love when you two come in. Great.

There's only two ways that I like to get my hair cut. We could either do it my way or I guess we could do it the highway.

So are you guys still... go ahead, yeah.

Oh, sorry. Sorry, I just had another joke, but I can...

No, go ahead.

I only get out of the house once a month and it's to come here to the barber, but you know, if there's no time for my joke, then there's no time for my joke.

No, we got time. We have time. We have time. No, no, no.

Edgar, it's time to go home.

Is it okay if you... It's okay if you don't have one.

No, it's not that I'm buying time to think of one. I just better get home because I feel like I've overstayed my welcome.

Hey, Eric. Can I talk to you for a second? We're just in private real quick. Edgar doesn't have anywhere to go. He only has the barber shop and he only has the one joke.

Oh really, his one joke. Yeah, it seems like he is frustrated at it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's really more about like this is his last, you know, spot where he can come and do his one joke and just... I don't want a haircut.

I went off from cuts. I don't know where I went wrong.

Sheer madness, right?

Okay, that's not helpful because Edgar can't, if you burn the jokes that Edgar can't do, it's a tough life for him, you know? We just try to make him as comfortable as we can with the time he's got left.

Hello, Denise.

Denise, can I come over and see the kids? He's talking to the mirror, okay. He does, he's on the phone.

Denise is the name of a woman from one of those placeholder photos in a Sears photo frame that Edgar's, he's constructed this whole fantasy with this woman named Denise and some kids.

I totally get it. I actually, before I cut hair, I was on a Riddle podcast with a couple guys and they only had a few jokes and they were falling in love with women from stock photos too. So this is not my first rodeo.

What's that Denise? You have to go back to LaGuardia to dance the tango?

Oh no. Back in my days, I had a life very similar to yours. I was on a podcast called Come Town.

Oh, good for you. That made a lot of money, I think.

I think I am. Basically, I was at it right before it got big. And then, yeah, they kind of just shuffled me off. Never let it be seen again. I mostly had one genre that I did on the show, which was haircut jokes. And they got too big and they didn't need the haircut jokes.

Sorry, I couldn't help but over here you said haircut jokes. I don't want a haircut joke. I want all of them joked.

Okay, I'm going back to my podcast. You're right, I'm throwing down my scissors and they're bouncing back up. Ow, cut my leg, walks out of the store, walks across the street to the studio, sits down, turns the computer on, logs on. Hey Adal, GPC, what's up you guys?

Lady left store, sorry I opened the cash register, take the money, put the money back, feel guilty, sit down, think about what I've done with my life, try and call Denise again, she's not answering in the mirror, fall down, do some push-ups on my back, which are called sit-ups, and die.

Primary character left, secondary character died, ceases to exist, Hey Erin, what's going on?

Hey, guys. Yeah, I'm sorry that I left the recording in a huff and said that, you know what? I'm going to find a new career. I'm going to cut hair. I didn't like it. It's a lot of the same thing that this is. Oh, wait, you left?

Adal and I were just screaming into each other's mouths for like seven minutes.

Oh, so you recorded an episode of Hey Riddle Riddle?

I guess so. It's one of the best. And Erin, can I just say you are covered in barbersaw.

Mm-hmm. And salt. And hair.

Ooh. A Manhattan tequila.

Exactly. So what's up, icky-a's?

Erin, not much. Welcome everyone to Hey Riddle Riddle, a podcast where we solve hurdles and we do opening bits that will increasingly become the show. I am JPC.

I am Rusty Credentials.

And I am... Erin Keif. Okay, wow.

Wait, I'm the only one with an alias now? Yep.

Yeah, that's how a bet is established. One person says their name, another person does a bet, and the third person says their name.

Rusty Credentials is wanted in up to five states.

I do love Rusty Credentials. Now that is a good character name that you, I mean, quite frankly, you could have pulled that out in a scene and really hit a whole run with it. Damn it.

Erin, edit this out. Just put a beep where I said the name.

Okay, I will. What is the news? What's going on? What happened?

Erin, this is the first Hey Riddle Riddle episode of May. Spring has officially sprung, and I'm sprung for spring. Should I get that bumper sticker? It's gonna be spring.

Um, yeah, it's May. May showers. Nope. April showers. Oh, there's, uh... Okay, now there's flowers. We now have flowers. April showers. Bring May flowers. Great. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month. May is a beautiful month.

That's true. Are you two familiar with the concept of MTV Spring Break? Yes. Uh, my dude. Yeah.

Well, I just want to make sure.

Are we going?

I was years older than you and I could name every VJ under the sun, starting with downtown Julie Brown.

I just wanted to ask, at any point in your life, did you ever, did you ever see, like, did you ever think like, oh, I could be one of those guys or women or whoever on the beach at MTV Spring Break. Did you ever think like, when I'm this age, I'll be there doing that?

I think MTV's Spring Break and MTV's The Grind turned me off from gatherings for my entire life. Sure. By the minute I hit college, I was like, I don't want to be around large groups of people ever. And I stick by that to this day.

I did think that maybe I would be somewhere like that.

Really? When I saw Spring Break stuff, because I was a little younger than I would have been appropriate. I guess it was more like I went. Hey Riddle.

I had so many friends who would go on spring break when I was in college and they'd come back and I'd be like, how was it? And they're like, we went to this place called Senior Frogs and they poured the tequila straight into your mouth. It was crazy. And I'm like, okay, that 22nd bit aside, how was it? And it's like, no, you don't understand. It was amazing. I'm like, what you described sounds awful. Yeah, for sure.

I was never a big partier. I think when I was a kid, I expected that to be my life. When I was in middle school, I was like, yeah, I'll probably do stuff like that. And then the second I tasted alcohol, I was like, no, no. I'm not going to do that.

Correct me if I'm wrong, Erin. What I imagine young Erin to think of when she thinks of parties is like 1930s Hollywood. You shut up.

You get the hell out of my head. You get the hell out of here man, you don't belong in there.

It's all tuxes and gowns and it's a lot of like martinis and people telling funny stories and then over the top laughing and then it's like Eileen Kazan naming names.

Okay, you're right. This is true. What I really thought adulthood would be or like even like college years is I was like, I'm gonna live in New York City, obviously. I'm gonna have own an apartment where I also own the rooftop and I'm gonna have like a gorgeous table with all these like candles and twinkle lights and I'm gonna have like really fancy dinner parties with like An artist from every kind of medium and everyone's going to be in love with me and I'm going to be so perfect. Every type of medium.

Paper and wood? And paper mache. Every type of medium, Patricia Arquette.

That's what I thought would be happening. But also maybe a couple spring breaks in there. And you knew you weren't going to be a spring breaker. That's interesting.

Well, I mean when I was a kid my my idea of what a party would be would be You know, it's like the late 18th century and someone's like, what a wit you are What a wit you simply must meet my friend Oh Hemingway I'm chopping it up with And his granddaughter's a famous actress right now. I'd be hanging out with Hemingway. Cortez.

Big Cortez, Ernest Hemingway. Yeah, makes sense.

All the big ones. Hemingway, Cortez, John the Baptist. We'd all be at the same party.

Augustus.

Who's the guy that discovered the Fountain of Youth? Oh, by the way, have you guys ever seen any of the Kingsmen movies? I think I've seen all three, unfortunately.

I haven't seen any, I don't think.

I don't recommend them. I think that they're all kind of trashy in a fun way, but I watched the newest Kingsmen movie.

The newest one is so bad. It's embarrassingly bad.

It's really bad and I was like, who is making these movies? And I read the Wikipedia of the director and apparently the director had this weird I felt immediate empathy for this man because he had this like weird family history where he thought his father was someone else and then like figured out that his father was this person that was like of a royal descent actually even though he was raised by this other guy and then all these movies are like obsessed with these weird alternate histories and I'm like oh it kind of makes sense that the guy who's making all these movies is kind of like living a life that is a weird alternate history But the new one, I was trying to think of like random historical figures I could put together and the new one is that. It's just like what history was whatever I think it is. I want to see a scene. JBC.

But is it fun bad? I need to know if it's worth it.

No, it's like Sinbad. Not the comedian, it's just so bad that it's kind of sinful. I did not find it to be Funbad, which is, I found the first Kingsman movie to be Funbad, but I don't think the rest of them really were.

Yeah, it's sort of like a downward slope. JPC, based on you saying royal descent, I want to see a scene. JPC, this is in Olden Times, wherever you will say it, in Olden Times. You own a perfumery for the royals, and that store is called Royal Descent. And Erin, you are a princess who's coming to the store to look around.

Hello!

My dear buddy, don't tell me, don't tell me. Obviously royalty. I want to say red hair.

You can tell I took a bath last month. Pretty impressive, very hygienic.

Vague hints of lavender obviously in the bath. High thread count on the pillows. About five, ten, five, nine maybe depending on the shoes. Princess Cynthia.

Yes, how could you tell? Is it because the man with the trumpet announced me before I came in here?

Yes, I knew that was a trumpet. Out of my store, you're driving away business.

The trumpet! The trumpet! Louder!

Princess Cynthia, Princess Cynthia, what can I, a humble apothecary of perfumed heirs, do for someone like you?

I want to smell like how the other half smells. I'm tired of smelling like I take a bath once a month and of roses and just good smells. I want to smell like the people in the town. I'm a woman of the people, don't you know?

You want our P2P perfume. That's Princess de Popper.

Exactly.

It's honestly, can I be honest with you, Princess Cynthia? It's very popular among the princess crap. You're not, you're not the first princess to come here to kind of want this treatment.

Hmm. Well, you smell like shit. Can I smell like you? What do you do?

I, I literally just took a shit and it's like, I mean, what am I going to do? Like I thought I was like, who's going to come by at noon? But of course, you know, princesses come by when they come by. Right. Now here's what I could do. I can make you smell like a dirty commoner and give you the common experience, but I'll be honest, princess, it sucks. It's not very good. Or I can give you what I like to call the sensationalized, uh, commoner experience, where I make you smell bad, but not like I just took a shit bad. And then like, I hook you up with like the, the, the town boot black, except, you know, he's like a ruggedly handsome, like, like he's more handsome. Okay.

I'm listening. Spray's on. Ooh, plague. Spray, spray.

He's not like the blacksmith with like the fucked up teeth and like, you know, the open sores. Like he's a boot black and he's like super good looking. I mean, I'm married, but he's like Hawooga, you know?

I just sprayed this plague smell that's out delicious.

Yeah. Okay. Not a smell. Don't worry about it. You're so inbred that you should be okay.

The queen is dead. I mean the princess is dead.

What are you practicing? See?

I love that you, the first 30 seconds of that scene you were basically playing the sorting hat where you're like, let's see, red hair, lavender, better be the fringes.

Remember when you guys did better ingredients, better pizza, better be Papa John's?

How they missed that marketing opportunity. Oh, lavender. So anyway, Erin, you're the puzzle man, right?

What made you think of Spring Break?

I don't know. It's spring. It's May. We're in the spring time.

I think he said spring and sprung.

I suppose I could get into some riddles or... Oh, did you hear that? Adal Rifai.

Yeah. Was there some... Erin?

I got stuck. What's up?

Wait, hold on. Is this Erin or is there someone wearing an Erin suit?

Hold on. I didn't hear that and I thought Erin was leaning into her bed like, do you hear that? It's patterning up on the roof. Oh no, Erin. It's not Uncle Santa.

You think that I don't have a plan to be Uncle Santa for an entire episode? Very soon, by the way. And I'm gonna come in, and I'm gonna be a dick, and I get to be the, I'm the chaos. I'm the chaos. Your sweatshirt's weird. I'm cool. I'm Uncle Santa.

This has become Captain Phillips. I am the chaos now. I am the Santa now.

Okay, I'll be, I'm Old Man Puzzles, so you know what that means. We're gonna avoid the riddles.

But today we have... It's so funny that you say that, because whenever I'm Old Man Puzzles, you're like, Adal, we need to do more riddles.

It's almost like we have a contentious relationship and we all try to fuck the other one over as hard as we can with riddles.

Okay, so we actually do have riddles submitted by a very special riddle submitter, someone who's maybe been on our show before.

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, Jim Carrey?

What the fuck? So, but before we get to that, I'm gonna do some warm-up riddles. These come from Noah.

Hey Erin, can I just say I'm going to give you the same compliment that I give every time I walk into a tourist truck gift shop. Excellent tease.

You say that every time you go into an I love New York store?

Honestly, that's where you find the excellent tease. It's the same thing I say every time I walk into a Kohl's.

Interesting. That's also the same thing you say to me anytime we go golfing.

I actually do love Taurus Trap t-shirts, like the pastel-y ones, you know, the ones that are like those like cool pastel colors that say like Denver on it.

Yeah.

My favorite sleep shirts, all of the shirts that I sleep in are all like Cape Cod, New Haven, and it's like... You like to travel in your dreams. Exactly.

I bought a tie-dye, keep Austin weird tank top as a bit, and it's probably one of my favorite articles of clothing that I own. I just love it so much.

Okay, so these come from Noah. Noah says, Hey y'all, I rode these riddles a few years back and I'm finally sending them in. Hope you enjoy, Noah.

Two of every animal, I bet. Very likely.

Noah's doing actually the opposite thing, where they hold their riddles for two years and then send them in, whereas most people send their riddles in and then we get to them two years later.

Exactly. Well, I'd actually like to see a scene really quick.

Oh no.

You two are two ostriches and you're in line to get onto the arc. And you're realizing like, is this the person that I have to spend the rest of my life with?

Sure.

I feel like we're so far back in the line. Did we do something? Are we being punished?

I mean, we all got the same note, right? And then we all like two by two by two to show up.

Yeah, but he handed out the numbers and we got... We're 7,240. What did we do to this dude? It seems so far back. Are we at the end? Are we at the end of the line? Are we being ostracized?

So it's you, huh? You're the one? Okay.

I mean... Interesting. Most people would laugh at that, but you're... You sighed and then you... You think most people would laugh at that. Well, I guess most animals. I'm sorry, most animals, specifically ostraces. Ostrac... Ostrac... Ostrac... Not funny... I can't even say the word. Ostraces.

Not funny and crazy. Great. Crazy?

Who you thought of as a... Crazy.

Can I be honest with you? I'm gonna stick my head in the sand if you keep this shit up. Look, hey, come on.

Okay, where have you sent the back of the line? Noah gave us the number. I think he's on to us.

What do you mean?

Okay, I'm gonna be honest with you, you be honest with me, can we at least do that? What animal are you? Well. Because this is a costume, obviously. It's the most insane thing I thought I could make.

If you must know, I'm 25 weasels inside an ostrich suit. Okay. No we're not. Yes we are. Come on. Guys, don't tell him. Stop it. I'm up here. Stop it. I'm up here. I'm a thousand bees and one talking spider. I was gonna say you are pretty high up off the ground.

Yeah, I can't. The spider can talk. The bees can't take directions for shit. They just gotta do whatever they're gonna do.

And now that I'm thinking about it, for the first 10 hours we were in line, all you said to me was some pig.

Yeah, I'm sorry about that. And by the way, I was going to say this earlier. I didn't want to be rude, but I think one of your weasels is out of place. And if you could just zip up. Oh, please tell me that's a weasel.

Well, sorry to say this. I am an ostrich, truly 25 weasels inside an ostrich suit, but inside each of those weasels is a thousand cockroaches. So I'm 25 weasels inside an ostrich and a thousand cockroaches inside those weasels.

Oh my god, that is such a relief to hear. Because I got about a thousand cockroaches inside each bee.

We're all cockroaches?

I guess!

Weee! Uh oh, that's not good. Oh man. Okay, okay, this is serious. We're gonna do just these quick warm-up riddles from Noah. And let's be serious, okay?

Okay, let's stop having fun. She could even make it through. Let's be serious. She clapped it.

No, I didn't laugh. I didn't laugh. Flick me once and I won't make a peep. Flick me again or you may not fall asleep. In darkness, you might just struggle to find me. One with no sight wouldn't need to search blindly. What am I?

Is this someone masturbating in bed to get to sleep? Yep. Yeah, I think it's Little Bo. Because if it works for you, do it.

No.

Is this a light switch?

Yes. Good, Adal.

Boomtown. Boom, baby.

You're on the board. I'm close like a lover and whisper to you. Tell secrets to me and I'll tell your friends too. I used to be stuck and now I have no tether. Back in the day, I was safe from the weather. What am I?

I gotta say, I gotta go with it again. Is this somebody masturbating in bed to fall asleep?

That's an answer eventually on these warm-up riddles, so keep asking.

Okay, I'll get it.

I'm close like a lover and whisper to you. Tell secrets to me and I'll tell your friends too. I used to be stuck and now I have no tether. Back in the day, I was safe from the weather. What am I?

I know it.

JPC.

Is it a phone?

Yep, it's a telephone. Yeah, a telephone. These are so good.

Yeah.

Sorry, I'm not home right now. I'm working on the farm. Right?

I'm out. Exactly.

Me dress, me dress.

And Beyonce. I'm out when you're likely asleep or relaxing. My surface is rough, so I'm constantly waxing. I used to be walked on, but not in a while. Every so often, I'm shaped like a smile. I'm out when you're likely asleep or relaxing. My surface is rough, so I'm constantly waxing. I used to be walked on but not in a while. Every so often I'm shaped like a smile. Hey Riddle

Who's about to go to bed. Erin, you are the moon. And GPC, you've heard the children's book too many times. Your parents have read it to you too many times. And you think tonight is the first night you're actually going to say good night to the moon and it doesn't go the way you thought it would.

The moon. The moon in the sky. Well. It's been a long day. I guess it's time for me to say... Good night, Moot. Stop it.

Stop it. Seriously, shut up. Does it look like I've had my coffee yet? Hello? I'm starting work right now.

What? Oh hello. Are you talking to me?

Shut up.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm Brian. I'm just I was gonna go to sleep Good night.

Okay. Well also it's a little passive-aggressive because this is obviously my morning I'm working right now. Do you see this? I'm working Do you know that it actually takes effort to stay in the sky? This is work.

I mean, I mean, I don't I don't know. I don't know anything. I'm sorry. I I

While you were having fun and playing in the sun all day, I was just trying to get some rest. But y'all are so loud. On Earth, you're screaming on the playgrounds. You're talking and you're laughing and you're screaming. Like, people work the night shift, assholes. Let's not mow our lawns. Oh my god.

Do you even care? I don't know.

Hey Brian, you kept me awake while I, me, the moon, was trying to sleep because you were screaming on the playground and you were going, Marco! And I go, who plays Marco Polo on a playground? That's for pools, idiot.

I mean, anyone can play Marco Polo.

It's not safe when you're not in the water. You're just wandering. Oh my god.

Unbelievable. I'm sorry. I'll try to play a quieter game during the day.

No, maybe you'll just scream while you're sleeping. What if the moon just started screaming, Brian?

I don't know. I don't know. It would be bad.

God damn it. I'm so tired. I'm sorry.

Good night.

I guess good night if you're tired. I'm starting work right now. Brian!

You're tired. Okay. Why don't you just call off today if you're so tired?

Why don't I just call off today?

It's a viable option. Hey listen, this date has been so fun. I mean, we have so much in common. We're both, you know, 25 years old. We both, you know, work as lawyers. I just feel like there's something a little off about you. Did something happen to you when you were a kid?

Um, yeah, kind of.

Do you want to tell me about it, or is that the second date kind of conversation?

No, it's probably best if I get it out now. So I was talking back to the moon, which I shouldn't have done, and they cursed me to have the mind of an eight-year-old forever. Oh, uh... Mind of an eight-year-old. But now that I'm here... A 25-year-old stunt lawyer. So have you...

All I want in the world is a piece of art that's a ton of children out playing and then the moon in the night sky just saying, y'all are so loud.

Oh my God, my brain. Okay, great.

Y'all are so loud.

Okay.

Did you turn into Adam Sandler there for a minute?

Yeah. Did you like it?

I loved it.

Uh, two locks and a window, but not any doors. My twins, the musician find it on tours using my, I'm sorry, I'm just laughing, thinking about you guys being funny generally.

This is the first to break down laughing and go, I'm just thinking about YouTube being funny. That is such, that is like such like lying in a job interview where you're just like, oh, I'm just laughing about something I heard earlier. It's like, no, you're fucking not. What's so funny? Nobody laughs at something from earlier in the day.

I really used to think about how you guys are funny and then it made me start to giggle. That is weird. Okay. Two locks in a window, but not any doors. My twins and musician find it on tours. Using my parts, you can spell out my name. Some versions of me have a rubber membrane. Two locks in a window, but not any doors. My twins and musician find it on tours. Using my parts, you can spell out my name. Some versions of me have a rubber membrane. I love this one. I think it's great.

Is this like an audio jack? Is this our new editor audio jack? I gotta see a seed, I gotta see a seed. So, Erin, Adal and I are in a band, we're doing a live concert, and suddenly our monitor has gone out, and we're calling to the back of the room to see if someone can come up and fix our monitor. Alright, before we begin our next song, it's just... And real quick, don't forget, my name is Rusty Credentials. And I'm Liam Gallagher, and I'm doing fine. This is my choice. And we are phoases. This is my choice. I have deed, my brother. Now. He's good. He doesn't know all the songs. Not too shabby. Sound too nabby? He's getting there. Our monitor just went out.

If we could have the sound... Yeah, if we could have the sound of the monitor.

I'm coming down to the stage to check it out.

I'm Audio Jack. Yay! This is quite a production. All right, I'm Audio Jack.

Ready? Let's do a call and response with the audience.

No, no, no, no. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Don't ask.

Oh, they're great blokes. Yeah, don't ask, don't ask. Don't ask, don't ask. My father was a donut in local 206, I believe, back in Cambridge. Alright, let's just make this mic even hotter.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, the feedback works. Oh, put that cat down.

Put that cat down. It's my cat though, it's Audio Jack's cat. He's always with me. He sits on my shoulder. What's its name?

If that's your cat, what's its name?

Rusty Credentials.

Oh, that's a good name.

Wait a second.

You can't say it was Rusty Credentials as well.

Yeah.

Aww. Casey, be fat when I say the name, but keep it when all the rejecters. Hey, Kate. Kate, Kate.

Can you play guitar?

No. Can you play the guitar?

So what is the answer to this riddle? Think about it.

Oh, thanks, Erin. I guess I'll just think about it.

A musician can use it too. It's a certain instrument as well as what it is. Two locks in a window but not any doors. My twin's a musician, find it on tours. Using my cards you can spell out my name.

Thanks for watching!

A music version, uh, and it spells keys.

You got it. Key. It's a keyboard.

A keytar.

A keyboard.

Oh, keyboard.

We have one more and then we'll go on. Hold on.

What's up? So walk me through this. Caps lock and deadlock. A keyboard. Okay. But what's the plastic membrane? Rubber membrane. Rubber membrane.

Okay.

Erin, I think my voice is stuck like this. Can we take a break?

Nope, not yet. We have one more.

The audience will have to suffer?

Yep, that's your choice.

Yeah, that's fucked.

You've used it ever since you were a kid. Think of it as your own personal squid. A pilot on a white mountain could make you think of it when you can't find your own, a co-worker's you'll covet.

Oh.

What is it?

I got it. Is this like a pilot pen? This is a pen. As someone who's obsessed with ink pens and gel pens, this is a pen.

Yep.

And pilot, I gotta say, fantastic brand of pen.

Really?

I don't know that I can name another brand of pen. Bic. Bic'd me again.

Yep. Well, we're going to go on a quick break and then we're going to have some riddles from a very special riddle giver. So stick around and Adal's voice will be fixed by the end of this.

I guess you could say we'll be right. Bic. Huh?

Whoo! Yeah! That Bic joke rules!

Hell yeah. Hell yeah.

I know what you're thinking. Do I have a new hat, Adal and JPC? New haircut? Why am I walking around with so much confidence?

I bet you're wondering. I wanted pretzels from the food court.

And I was just going to let you know that it looks like you leaned on paint.

Anyways, I just had a bunch of subscriptions canceled for me by Rocket Money that I wasn't using. And so now I'm flushed with cash and now I'm competent. Pretzel money? Well, maybe we'll talk about that. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that binds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place. I've been using it for years, even before they were a sponsor.

Erin, it looks like you may have leaned on, like, with someone painting a rocket money, like, billboard or sign or something, because it's all down your back. It's like, and it's, I could, ock it, ock it.

People think they're spending $80 on their subscriptions when in reality, the number is closer to $200. And when you signed up for so many free trials, like streaming services, you watch one show and then you completely forget about it. You lose track and then all of a sudden you're like, why am I bleeding money? Rocket money? They take care of that for you. They go, sit back, relax. We got this. And they make everything color coded and easy and super intuitive.

You're also color-coded. A little birdie told me that Rocket Money also lets you monitor all your expenses in one place, recommends custom budgets based on your past spending, and they'll even send you notifications when you've reached your spending limits, which sounds like something my friend would like, but I forget which friend I'm so hungry for pretzels.

Speaking of pretzels, you don't get all twisted up by salt and bean and the bread of your finances. With over 3 million users and counting, Rocket Money customers have saved an average of $720 a year.

Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and manage your money the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash riddle. That's rocketmoney.com slash riddle. Rocketmoney.com slash R-I-D-D-L-E.

Hey, what's going on? Somebody leaned over my rocket money paint thing. Run. Everybody run. Run.

Is that DaVinci?

Yeah.

Yes.

And bye. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey everybody, this is uh, this is GPC and um... I'm here too. Yeah, Erin's here as well. And it's with a heavy heart that we kind of do this ad read because one of our own, Mr. Adal Rifai, is not with us.

He is unfortunately stuck in a cat costume. They're calling it a medical phenomenon. And a disaster. But we're going to soldier on. We're going to be brave today. I do want to talk to my better help therapist a little later about what this has done to my nervous system.

We're going to need that, yep.

And if you're thinking of starting therapy, you should give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with your licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists any time for no additional charge. Conventional therapy where you had to drive to an office never really worked well for me. Like today, I get to send my therapist a message saying, you know how Adal loves to dress up like a cat? And sometimes he gets stuck, well this time he might. Be snuggly ever.

Erin, let's not think like that. Let's not think like that, okay? Because that's a negative spiral and that's going to lead us to needing more better help. I mean, if you think that conventional therapy is the only way to do therapy, then I beg of you. Have one of your best friends in this world get stuck in a cat costume and they can't find where the zipper starts. I don't know if we mentioned that, but that's one of the biggest problems. It's all zipped up.

Okay, so get a break from your thoughts like this.

Intrusive thought. Bad.

Visit BetterHelp.com slash Riddle today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Riddle, R-I-D-D-L-E.

Oh, Erin, speaking of 10% off, this is actually good news. I just got a text from the medical staff. It looks like the cat costume is 10% off. So 90% to go pray for our friend.

It's not enough. It's not enough. It's barely the toes. It's not enough for him to have a normal life.

I'm having a great time

Adal, Erin, thank goodness you're here. Time is of the essence. I am trapped underneath this huge piece of metal. Oh, actually, you know what? Hold on. I have to get to this within the first 30 seconds. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. And Squarespace is the all-in-one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. I'll get to your questions about the car that I'm trapped under in a second. Whether you're just standing out or managing a growing brand, Squarespace makes it easy to create a beautiful website, engage with your audience. Hold on. I'm not done. And I have to get to this. And sell anything from products to content to time, all in one place, all on your terms.

I was going to say, JPC, oh my God. Don't they also have an online store available? You can sell all your products, whether you sell physical, digital, or service products. Squarespace has the tools you need to start selling online.

Oh no, you're stuck under a car! And you can get started with one of their professional website templates with designs for every category to use. Then customize your look, update content, and add features to fit your unique needs. You can make any Squarespace template that you want so your idea, brand, or business stands out online on every device. Help JPC. We gotta help him.

Help JPC. You know what, Erin? It's fine. I was able to get out with my own ingenuity. Thanks and no part to my great assets. Hey, and speaking of assets, you could upload, organize, and access all of your content from one place. With a new asset library, you're able to manage all your files from one central hub and use them across the Squarespace platform. Well, I bet you are wondering how I got in this mess, huh?

Oh, sorry. I'm over here eating. Did you, did you need us?

Yeah, we're over here eating.

What are you guys eating? Get your pet paid.

Okay, so head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to www.squarespace.com slash Riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. That is www.squarespace.com slash Riddle to get 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Wait, that's not a car on you. That's a backpack. You can't play the guy for joy.

He is wearing a backpack. Come on, get out of here. Scram.

Well, Erin, fall is officially here, which means it's time to get into our fall routines. And there's nothing that I love more than using my Raycon wireless earbuds to listen to some classic fall music. I'm sorry. I want to do this. I just can't do this because I know that my friend Adal is stuck in a full body cat costume and that includes

fabric over the ears and I know he can't use his Raycon wireless earbuds and it just no you could do this you started so well you're being very brave Raycon gives you up to eight hours of playtime and 32 hour battery life and they are so good and smooth and the optimized gel tips they feel like butter in your ears

All Adal wanted was 8 hours of playtime and now he's going to have an eternity of playtime except we're not playing games anymore because he's really stuck in that suit.

Here, I'll distract you. Raycon's Everyday Earbuds have over 78,000 five-star reviews and they're priced just right. You get quality audio for half the price of other premium audio brands.

I wish we were able to give all of our listeners quality audio but I just know in my heart That with the big guy all sewn up in that suit, it's just not gonna be possible to have the same quality of audio that we normally deliver. I can't stop making the ad, which is supposed to be about Raycon earbuds, that you love, that I love! I can't stop making it about my friend who's trapped in that cat costume.

No, no, no. Remember there's like noise isolation and you can do three customizable sound profiles just completely suited to you. Hi Fidelity Audio, come on GBC, we can do this.

They also have an awareness mode and I've heard that Adal is now stuck in permanent awareness mode because he's aware of all of his cat-like appendages and he's starting to forget what it feels like to be a man because he is going to be only cat from here on out.

I just wish that the doctors didn't tell us how much pain he was in. So anyways, school's back in session, which means Raycon is having their annual back to school sale. For a limited time only, go to buyraycon.com slash riddle today to get 20% off site-wide. Plus free shipping. That's buyraycon.com slash riddle to score 20% off. buyraycon.com slash riddle. Oh, Adal.

Erin, it's wild that you said 20% off. Because I just got a text from his medical team and it looks like the cat costume.

The costume is 20% back on.

Yes, he's really buried himself in it.

We miss you boy, get better soon.

I miss you Adal.

Ah, oh, thank you two so much for taking me in for surgery. I feel much better.

Well yeah, that was a four month long break.

Oh, can I just say Magic Tavern would have been ruined. If I sounded like that for Magic Cavern, I'd be fucked.

A beautiful ass for you Adal, and I don't know how that fixed it. Thank you. But that thing is bangin'.

Yeah, the comparison I brought in was a photo of Powdered Toastman from Ryan and Stiffy. You know when he bends down to fly?

See, what it looks like to me, and I mean this as a compliment, is Mel Brooks in Spaceballs when he gets his ass, his body turned around and he pulls back his coat and he can see his own ass in the front. I mean, that's what it looks like to me. It looks great.

Thank you so much. Yeah, I guess they did put it in the front.

Brooke, yeah. It fixed the problem though, so it's like bakers can't be choosers, but you do have about the front.

You couldn't have been on Magic Tavern without a great ass.

Thank you. Yeah, Arnie and Matt. I don't know if you've ever been in the locker room with Arnie and Matt. Hachimachi. Those buns are toned. Yeah, they're both big ass. Oh, I didn't tell you guys that we started our own high school. It's just the three of us.

That's fun. Who's the popular kid, who's the jock, and who's the nerd?

Arnie's all three. Yup.

Yup.

Cool. We take drugs teaching and learning. I like it. That makes fucking sense.

Poor Arnie had to sit next to me during that New York caption contest game that we played at your bachelor party. So he just had to listen to my sheer panic about how I wasn't funny enough. I was just like, Arnie, I'm not funny. And he was like, you're okay. And I was like, I'm not funny, Arnie. They're gonna know.

Arnie is the most I've never in my life met someone who's more like even keel like in any stressful situation he would be my number one pick of like who would you want to be in like a plane incident with or on a stranded boat or whatever the question is it's Arnie because he is so I've never seen him mad I've never seen him panic like he is a roast of myself he's the opposite of me if that's any He has his shit together. That's what I'm saying.

He has his shit together. All right, let's do some more riddles, shall we? Yes, please. These come from, oh, I don't even know who this is. Wait, let me put my glasses on. Let me take a look. Oh, these are from Anthony Birch from Dungeons and Daddies. He replaced you on the show for a little while.

Can I just say, when you were gone and Anthony was one of our co-hosts, the amount of... The amount of merchandise that we sold was a peak peak from Hey Riddle Riddle's time on the air, our peak merch sales from merchandising. That's true.

That would be a very funny bit if we made merchandise tease and Hey Riddle Riddle sold it instead of Dungeons and Daddies. We're doing it, Anthony!

We're doing it!

Wait a minute. Don't sue us!

I'm

Anthony Burch is on the one. So we just get a picture of him for the one. It's like D6's. Or it's D whatever because he's the one. And it's just a photo of his head as the one. And we sell them at our store. So they're dice. So they're D&D based. And it's Anthony Burch. So it's like really in Dungeons and Daddies alley. Except we sell them on our store.

Can't sue us. Can't sue us. Dibs. Dibs are not suing us.

Anthony, if you would like me to tattoo your leg with Burchin Dice, text me and we'll get it done.

And we're going to make those dice and I... You're silent, Anthony. He's not... I ain't saying anything.

He didn't text me, so... Great.

All right. So let's get into it. This is from Anthony. Ready? This is either a type of riddle I made up or I'm ripping it off from somewhere and I don't remember where. Shit. Maybe Hey Riddle Riddle. That'd be embarrassing. I'm calling them pop chains, but that's stupid. So feel free to come up with a better name. I don't think it's stupid. I think it's a great name.

And Anthony, you don't have to be embarrassed about submitting riddles we've done on the show before because we've done the same hurdles multiple times at the show before and forgot about it. And sometimes we know we don't care.

The premise is that you have to connect one work of pop culture to another by linking the words or other forms of the same word contained in the titles of other works of pop culture.

Fuck yes. This is my heaven. I am in heaven right now. Yeah.

These are amazing and we're very lucky that he took the time to do this.

We're not telling anyone, but Adal did die during that butt surgery and so he is literally in heaven right now.

Would you know my ass if you squeeze it in heaven? Erin, is there an example just to make sure we understand?

Oh, perfect. For example, let's say Calvin and Hobbes to Shawshank Redemption and there's one link. So it would be Calvin and Hobbes Fast and Furious presents Hobbs and Shaw, Shawshank Redemption. So the one link is Fast and Furious presents Hobbs and Shaw.

I was going to say Calvin and Hobbs, Calvin pissing on a Ford. I can't afford to watch Shawshank Redemption again.

Is it expensive to rent right now?

All the judges on Adal's dismount. 10, 10, 10, 10. Germany, 9.5.

Germany, fuck you. We beat your ass. What? I can't... Erin? I cannot afford TBS. I said it. Who has time and money for TBS?

Is it streaming free somewhere? We'll fix this for you.

I assume TBS is still basic cable, which means you have to pay for basic cable, which who could afford that?

So you guys, are you getting how it works or do you want me to go into it?

No, I get it, I get it, I get it. I love the idea of, if anyone from Marvel is listening, please let me work on the title called Basic Cable. And it's cable and he wears like cargo shorts and like a polo and he has like a barbed wire tattoo and he's just like going to Taco Bell and getting drunk. Like please let me write basic cable. Thank you so much.

Going to Taco Bell to get drunk? Wow. I'm listening. Cantina.

If you think they're not casting Larry the cable guy as basic cable, then I don't know what you're... I mean, you're barking up the wrong tree.

I'm from the feature heater done.

Here's another example, but it's two links this time. Okay. So it's even more thinking.

Wow.

Blade to Man on Wire. Do you want to try it before I... Blade to Man on Wire.

So Man on Wire, I don't think I've seen this movie, but I believe it's a Mel Gibson movie? Or is that... No, it doesn't... I'm sorry, that's Bird on a Wire. Man on Wire is the documentary about the guy who walks between the... Yeah, and it doesn't matter what the things are about, it's just the titles.

Yeah, so it's like Man on Wire and Blade. So it's like you would need to be like Repo Man and like Blade Repo or something like that, right? Like you'd have to find the combination.

What if it was like Blade, Trenchcoat, Matrix, Matrix Reloaded, Twins, Twin Towers Man on Wire?

So Adal, this is how you do an Eminem impression, but it's not, I don't necessarily know it's how you play this game.

It's just a title, so it has to have the same word.

I see, I see. So we could do, so Blade into like Blade Runner.

Yep.

So Blade to Blade Runner, Runner to Running Man. Running Man to Man on Wire.

Yeah, you did it.

You nailed it. You nailed it.

Yeah.

And he says, does that make sense? Also, I'm sure there are multiple correct answers to many of these, which I would be shocked if we could find up another one, but we'll see. All right. Ready?

Yes.

Texas Ranger to Red Dead Redemption.

What is, Texas Ranger, is that the Chuck Norris one?

It's Walker, Texas Ranger.

Walker, Texas Ranger. Oh yeah, sorry.

Sorry. Let me read that again, because I didn't read the word Walker. Ready? Walker, Texas Ranger to Red Dead Redemption.

Mmm. Walker, Texas Ranger to Red Dead Redemption.

Erin, is this one jump or two?

It's one link.

One link. Walker, Texas Ranger.

So what we're looking for is Ranger to Red. Is it like Red Power Ranger, Power Ranger Red? Right? There was a Red Power Ranger.

He didn't have a spin-off movie.

Not his own movie? What was the Red Power Rangers deal? I don't remember. The blue one was the dirty one.

He was red.

Yeah, thank you.

So it's just the title.

Walker Texas Ranger. Movies with Walker... It has to be a movie title.

You want Ranger. Walker Texas Ranger to red. Oh, it has to be Ranger?

It doesn't have to be Ranger.

Oh. But it has to be a movie title, right?

It has to be a title of something in pop culture.

It doesn't have to be Ranger.

It doesn't have to be the last word. It can be any word in it. And it can be any version of any of those words. Oh man, that makes us harder, huh?

Oh boy. Yeah, I'm struggling with this one.

Walker, Texas, Ranger.

This... Walker, Soul Walker, Walker, Texas, Texas.

What connects these two works of fiction? Robins.

Robins? Red Robin. Yum. No.

Red Robin? Is that pop culture? I was like, that's a restaurant chain.

I'll tell you what the connection is. It's from Walker. It's a form of the word.

Walker.

Walker. A Walk to Remember.

A Walk to Robin Remember.

Remember Red. Remember for Red October.

Mandy Less. Less than zero. Bret Easton. Ellis. Ellis Island. Island of Dr. Moreau.

What's the word of the word in the production that we're trying to get to?

The second.

Dead.

Dead.

So Walker to Dead. Walker to Dead.

Could be any form of the word walk. Oh, so walk tall?

No, walk. Walk hard, hard dead.

No, it's only one link. So it's something that has walk and dead. Oh, the walking dead. Mm hmm.

That's a Walker Texas Ranger to walking dead to ready to redemption.

Yep.

The walking dead.

It would also accept dead man walking.

Thank you for reminding us it can be any any form of the word or tense. That's great.

Yes. OK. These are delightful. I know. I love these. Star Wars to the born identity.

And how many links?

One Link.

One Link, just like how I like my Zelda games.

One Link, I know what you're slaying.

Please don't kiss to the born identity.

Star Wars to the born identity. Oh, I got it. Star Wars to a star is born to the born identity. Wow. Put these on my tombstone.

I know. Aren't these amazing?

Pepperoni.

New York City get the rope. Remember that commercial? Isn't it wild that they were going to kill a guy over salsa?

New York City. Yeah, they did.

The commercial cut away, but that means... Problem child to Superman. One link.

Problem child to Superman. Problem child.

I remember it can be any form of the word, like plural or... Oh, children of men.

Problem children of men, Superman. Yeah, okay.

Nice. I'd like to see a scene.

Oh, please.

Adal, you are whatever superhero you choose. In JBC, you're Superman. In JBC, you're sort of realizing how boring Superman is when you're talking to Adal. You're realizing that you might be one of the most boring superheroes.

Check out this spread, huh? Not bad.

Yeah, this is a great party. Is anyone sitting here? Can I pop a squat?

No, no, please. Yeah, absolutely. No one's come over to talk to me. I don't know, whatever. Oh, are you nervous? No, no, no. Sit, sit, sit.

Sorry, it's going to take me a minute to sit down. I just have to move all this fabric. I'm Dr. I'm Dr. Drapes.

Oh, does the carpet match?

No, I shaved down there. You might have heard my catchphrase is, it's curtains for you. I love you.

Yeah.

No, no, no. And maybe you've seen the car that I drive around. It's a Dodge Durango.

Man, what universe are you from? What cinematic universe are you using, Marvel?

I'm from Image. Image. And sorry, when I say Dodge Durango, it's two Dodge Durangos on top of each other, and I'm in the top one.

A double-decker Durango. Yeah. A double, yeah, a double Durango. Superman, nice to meet you. What's the name? Superman. I'm kind of the whole package. I'm sorry if I'm laughing.

I was thinking of my friends being funny.

Your name is Superman.

What are you a doctor? So it's an adjective and then literally what you are. Your name is Dr. Drapes, is that? Yeah, Dr. Drapes. And I use my fabric to wrap around criminals and to stop crime. So what is, sorry, you seem to have a rinky-dink little red cape. What's that? Are you trying to encourage bulls to attack you?

I mean, no, they're welcome to try. Can I be honest with you? Yeah. I was having one of the roughest nights of my life. Meeting you has really turned that around. I guess I do have a lot to be thankful for.

So what are your, um, I mean, your outfit. I'm sorry, I just, I'm gonna be a straight shooter. I'm from Image. I'm gonna be a straight shooter. I'm gonna give it to you raw. That's what, that's what, that's what Image promises. Are you, what are your powers? Are you just like a guy? What do you, what is your thing?

It's like, uh, that's invincibility and I can fly. Your power is invincibility and flying? I can shoot lasers out of my eyes. I'm super strong. Wait, all of those? Are you joking?

So how are you interesting or fun?

I can't be killed. Oh, I have a weakness, but it's like a rock from space that no one has.

Like a space opera? Like Flash Gordon?

So wait, hold on.

Even though I can get past pretty easily. I've met a few, I've met one of your compatriots, I believe. The guy's name is The Flash. Now, The Flash, well, I gotta say, great name, and he has one power. And his one power is he can run super fast. So fast, in fact, he can turn the Earth back on its axis and turn back time. Now, that's a power.

Yeah, I'm about as fast.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're about as... I'm so sorry. I can't wrap my head around this, or my curtains around this. You're about as fast as the Flash, and his one power is being fast? In addition to the eight other powers you listed, you're also as fast as the Flash. I'm about as fast? That's what I'm flying. Hey, hey. Pony up. Come over here. Pony up. Come over here.

Hey Riddle.

I super fast, super strong, I can fly, I can shoot laser beams, I can't be killed, and I am from space.

Wait, am I overhearing this right? Are you serious? That's like everything. That's like what a little kid imagines a superhero to be. That's so funny.

That's like someone playing God in an improv scene. It's boring.

Wow, that scene made me realize Superman has it all.

All right, back to the future to Miller's Crossing. Two links. Way harder.

Back to the future, Miller's Crossing. Okay. I'm going to try and work backwards a little bit. So Miller's Crossing, was Crossing Jordan a show?

It sounds like a show.

I think that was a TV show. Crossing Jordan? Sure. I never watched it, but I believe I saw it in a TV Guide when I was, I don't know, 14. So Crossing Jordan.

One of these movies I'm not very familiar with.

It's not a TV show. There's no TV shows. Future Man is a TV show.

I would start at the end of this. What is something that could connect to Miller's Crossing?

It's Miller time.

Meet the Millers? That's not the title, you're so close though.

Whoa, we're the Millers. We are the Millers.

Okay, I've seen that. Sudekus and Anderson. I just hear Slory's last names now.

Yeah, Sudekus, Anderson.

Oh, that animated movie about dinosaurs.

Oh, dinosaurs? Land Before Time.

The last dinosaur. Wait. Back to the future... Wait, what'd you say, Erin?

It's a bad...

We're back. We are the Millers at Miller time or whatever we said at the beginning. We're back. Wait, what is we're back? I know it's a dinosaur movie, but I don't know how I know that. I've never seen it. I guess we're all watching that now. I definitely have seen it when I was a child because this has to be an old ass movie. This has to be from like I want to say 94. Yeah, that's super old.

You want to go pick Google on it?

I know, that's super old. Yeah, hold on, let's see it. We're back, the movie. We're back. We're back.

I remember as a kid loving, uh, not Land of the Lost.

Holy shit. 93. I was so close. We're back, a dinosaur story. It is a family fantasy movie for fun loving dinosaurs. Take a trip to New York City.

Oh wait, I've seen, I've definitely seen this cover before. Yeah. I think they also had a cross in with like McDonald's or something. I feel like I saw a bunch of this merchandise when I was younger.

Oh yeah.

John Goodman, Walter Cronkite, Yurdly Smith, you know, a children's movie. Yurdly Smith? She does more than just Bart? No, that's the answer to that, right? Yurdly is Lisa. Chilly Child, Ray Pearlman, LaVant, Kenneth Mars. Wow. Okay. So I guess we got to go watch Weird Back. That is the 90s, right?

We'll do that for a review crew.

Yeah, let's do it. If we could find it.

All right. We have three more.

Hell yeah.

Raiders of the Lost Ark to Romancing the Stone, two links.

Everybody loves Raiders. Yeah, let's see. Raiders of the Lost Ark to Romancing the Stone.

So I think... Where are the Raiders from? The Oakland Raiders to... Erin? No. I got Stone in Oakland once.

Erin, if I say a movie, will you tell me if it's one of the right links? Sure. True romance?

No.

Okay, so it's not true. Is romance the right word?

Focus on stone.

Stone. Stone age. Stone. The wrong stone. Stone. Pony. Stone. The family stone?

No. And then Raiders of the Lost Ark, I'd focus on raiders.

Raiders. Oh, the raid. Room Raiders.

The room. It's Darth Raider.

Raider. Oh, and don't forget it can be video games or whatever else. Raiden from Mortal Kombat.

It's the second word of it. How about I just give you the hint?

Yeah, just hit us with that hit.

All the films in this chain are about rating lost artifacts, except for the third one, which is about mustaches, which is so funny that this one is about mustaches. That made me laugh so hard when I read it the first time. That must be a Wes Anderson movie. No, once I say it, you're going to be like, yeah, really, the mustaches and that were really kind of distracting. I feel like I was focusing on that instead of... Is it a Poirot movie? No, it's... Okay.

It's got stone in it, right?

A Western.

Oh, Tombstone. Tombstone is, I mean, Valcomer's mustache and Kurt Russell's. It's pretty wild.

Oh, and then Tomb Raider. We got Tomb Raider.

Nice. Yeah.

Hell yeah.

We got it. We got it. Erin, can you confirm?

Yep, you got it.

Nice.

The Thing to Love Actually, and it's two links.

The Thing, my favorite horror film, to Love Actually, my second favorite horror film.

I want to say that thing you do.

No, that's the point.

Okay, to the thing.

Well, no, you could do the thing, that thing you do, love me do, love actually, but that's not what this is.

There you go. Is do the right thing? Do the right thing? Is it do the right thing? No. Okay.

Is it? It's a TV show.

Oh, Family Things?

It's very, very popular. It's on Netflix.

Thanks for watching!

Just another example as how one of us could be me should be replaced with Anthony Burch. Can you imagine these every week? That's what you could get if you guys fire me and hire him. Amazing, right?

We could not afford to pay Anthony Burch.

I know. He's so smart. You get the dummy rate with me. You pay me in chocolate coins. Alright. The Empire strikes back to Spice World and it's three links as of now.

The Empire Strikes Back Empire Records No. No, damn it. The Empire Strikes Back Back to the Future Men in black. Men in back. Future is female.

Some of these have, there's a TV show maybe in this.

Did you say Spice World, Erin?

Yes, I did.

Spice World. Back to, wait, I'm sorry, not Back to the Future. What was it?

The Empire Strikes Back to Spice World. So the Empire Strikes Back and the thing that comes after that is a TV show.

Okay. Empire. Oh, well, there's a show called Empire.

Yeah, but you have the right word.

There's another show. There's a commercial for Empire Carpets. It doesn't matter.

We'll never know. Erin, is this a TV show that is pretty well known?

Yeah, I would say so.

It was on HBO.

Oh, Boardwalk Empire. So Empire Strikes Back, Boardwalk Empire, board to death.

Oh wow. It's boardwalk still.

It's still boardwalk? Boardwalk things. A boardwalk to remember. Could it be a song?

Yeah.

It can be a song under the boardwalk? That's it?

And then under the boardwalk to Spice World.

Yeah. Under the boardwalk to Spice World.

Underworld. Yep, you got it. And those are... Can I just say, these are so satisfying. When you solve them, if you feel like you're freaking king of the world,

I love these. You feel like you're Nicolas Cage and that other guy trying to find the Declaration of Independence?

Something like that.

Something like that.

Anthony, thank you so much for writing these.

I loved them.

Thank you Anthony. If anyone wants to write this kind of format and submit it to us, I know I would love to do some more. Yes please.

And all you gotta do is get permission from Anthony. So DM Anthony to ask if you can't have permission to format his riddles. Well typically Anthony DMS.

email hrrpodcast at gmail.com

Wow. Yeah, when I said D of Anthony, I did mean that you should run a campaign for Anthony. Then after a couple of years, casually be like, hey man, do you mind if I submit some of those riddles that you did for Hey Riddle Riddle? And by that time he's your friend, he'll be like, dude, it's totally cool. Like go with God by the way.

Anthony, I don't know if you remember, I ran that Honey Heist one shot for you. Can you do 400 hours of my podcast?

Adal, anything to plug?

Um, I want to plug, speaking of Anthony Burch and merchandise, I want to plug a wonderful podcast you should listen to called Dungeons and Daddies. Uh, it's fantastic. Everyone involved is absolutely wonderful, not just as performers, but also as humans. And, um, everyone should be listening to it.

But Adal, they have so many fucking episodes. I mean, is it possible just to jump in? Was there like recently a new season of the show?

Yes, they just started a new season and you can hop in there and you don't have to have listened. But if you did listen to the first season, you're going to catch some fun Easter eggs and some familial ties and whatnot. But yes, you can jump in currently. Adal, anything to plug?

Yeah, as we all know, I'm ceding my plug time for the foreseeable future. And this one is to read another five-star review. This one is from, I want to say, L.Espo7, who says, Warning! The following podcast is highly addictive. Do not listen to this podcast unless you are prepared to fall in love with the hosts. Erin, GPC, and Adal are three of my favorite people that I've never met. The show is so funny and also the only podcast that I've ever completed and then started over from episode one to go back through because I needed more. Also, subscribe to the Patreon and never regret it for a second. My favorite show to get me through the day. And we should say we do have a $500 Applebee's gift card to mail to that person. We're just going to put it in a blank envelope, put it in the mail, and if you find it, that is yours. And go ahead and just load it up with $500 and you got an Apple Beast meal. Oh, Erin, would you like to plug anything at all?

Yes. Speaking of Anthony Burch, this is a little bit of a spoiler, but the episode he recorded with sitcom D&D is going to be out soon. So follow sitcom D&D on Instagram and Twitter and look out for that. It's a very, very fun episode and I can't wait for people to hear it. And you're hearing it here first that he's going to be on the show. So that's pretty cool. And thank you Anthony for doing that. And for submitting these riddles. This is so nice. Um, Jupiter I guess. You guys are so funny. I can't believe I was giggling about you guys just being funny. No, no, no, no, no, no.

I guess if I can buy forever or whatever.

Okay. That'll be good. Casey, are we gonna talk?

And our parents in the music.

Hello created by Emily Cartavis. Can Emily read the words? Hey there, Annies and Mays. If you like that, you are going to love this week's Patreon. We have special guest Thomas Sanders on to play an anime game. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash heyriddleriddle by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew for $8 a month. And you get those ad-free episodes. See you there!

That was a head gum podcast.