Which Riddle Riddle?

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Erin, my dear, when he defined the relationship, it ruined it for me.

Me too, fake husband. Me too.

I'm getting beat up every day.

Now point me in the direction of this witch. I'd like to have a word with her. It's me. I'm the witch. I'd put the curse on Adal. I'm really sorry.

What? Give me five seconds here. I'm gonna tell my sister to turn down the goddamn TV.

Oh, that reminds me. I should do my math homework. Oh, wow.

God, get a hammer because we are nailing his ass to the wall. Hold on, my grandma's making cookies too loud.

Hang on, my cannon string phone just rang.

It was the captain of an airplane. He stabbed him with an ice cream. And the horse came riding.

Here's JPC and Erin. They're two people who love podcasts. We've replaced their morning podcast with an episode of Hey Riddle Riddle. Let's see if they noticed. The fuck is this?

Honey, our podcast is broken.

The fuck is this?

I hate this. I miss our old podcast. Who did this?

Enjoying your breakfast podcast? Ha! Jesus Christ! Sorry, I'm the table. The table's talking to me.

Honey, I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning because the table is talking to us.

Why are you making your voice sound like that? What's going on? What is this podcast?

What? What? You're listening to Hey Riddle Riddle. It's a podcast. I'm not.

I'm listening to a table tell me that my wife's on a TV show.

It's a podcast where people try and solve riddles and along the way they do improvise scenes.

How do you like it? GPC, GPC wake up. You're having a nightmare.

Oh God. I was having the worst dream. We were blowing it in front of a guest.

Oh no.

GVC, that's what's happening because we have a very special guest. One, I think last time we gave her a nickname because that's what she needs is more podcast nicknames. We have Janet Morph herself, Janet Varney.

Welcome back to the show, Janet Morph.

Thanks for having me. It's great to be here. It's great to see everybody. Oh, we did it.

Mm-hmm. Although you shit on Casey pretty hard when you popped on the call here.

I did, but I shit on you harder when you went to go tell your sister to turn the TV down.

Okay, well now everyone knows my business. Now everyone knows that my sister uses my TV.

Point of clarification. Yeah, it's more likely someone can locate you because now they know your sister has a TV over there.

Is Janet's nickname, is it Janet Morph or is it Janna Morph?

I think it was Janet Morph.

So Janet, how was your last four years? Do you think events will happen to you or the world? I think so. I'm trying to think. I think a couple of years ago, oof, I want to say I had a really good quiche, like a piece of quiche that I just was not expecting to be because it had smoked gouda in it. That's what's coming up for me right now. Interesting.

So I would expect a smoked gouda quiche to be out of this fucking world. I would expect to love that.

Really good.

Okay.

It was really good. It was like stay inside your house for two years and don't go outside and wear a mask good. Do you know what I mean? Like that is what it makes you want to do.

So since we haven't, I don't think we've recorded with you since quarantine, you have a new podcast. Do you want to tell us about that?

I do. I have a podcast on the iHeart Network. It is a Nickelodeon podcast about all things Avatar-verse, which means Avatar the Last Airbender and Legend of Korra and not the James Cameron Avatar movie. I mean, that has got to be tough on everyone associated with both projects. And then no one is gonna yield, you know what I mean? No one is gonna be like the project formerly known as Avatar.

Did you, can I ask, with your new podcast, which I'm very excited to listen to, I'm planning on doing a rewatch and listening to the episodes along the way, did you insert something that's almost like a The Wall, Pink Floyd's The Wall, Wizard of Oz, where if you do happen to watch the James Cameron version, the podcast syncs up and tells some fun little story or something?

That is my number one priority for season two because we are almost done with season one and I might need some help orchestrating that because now I feel like it does need to be something hey riddle riddle level good. Like maybe there is like an elaborate scheme that we come up with where there's lots of we plant lots of little Easter eggs.

Just for future reference, if you ever decide to start a new podcast, I would listen to you talk about James Cameron's entire filmography.

I would love, you just being like, um, and not, I don't want you to rewatch any of the movies, just being like, such a titanic was As I recall, I was very interested in the water in the abyss in this almost sensual way. If I recall, without a rewatch, that was really sexy water.

Yes, it's almost like, what's his name? Robert Patrick in Terminator? It's almost like a liquid metal, but the water does present itself in a very sensual way. And I remember the first time I saw that movie, I was very much like, what's up with this water? Where I'm like, does anyone know, is this water single or what's going on?

The people died, Adal.

What?

I just put it together that we were talking about like the James Cameron Avatar with the Navee. I was like James Cameron directed the Avatar movie? I was like that can't be right. I was like, everybody's getting the detail wrong. I think that was in the shuttle. But I can't be sure.

OK. You can be sure. OK. You can be sure. OK.

I do need to. This might be the earliest scene we've ever called for. I do need to see just a very, just the smallest little sprinkling. It is 7 a.m. The smallest little saffron sprinkle of a scene. Janet, you are whatever age you were when you watched Abyss. Erin, you are the water and you two are on a first date.

Splash. Hey. Hey. I was going to try to play it cool, but I'm going to tell you I am starstruck. I'm waterstruck right now. I get that a lot. Oh my gosh. Have you ever been on a date with a celebrity before? I haven't and I did not realize how truly long you are. I mean your water body is stretching out of the cafe. I can see it going down the block. I don't know where you end. I guess I know where you end. I don't know where you begin.

We cut to the end of the water where the back end is having another date. So where are you from? Splash.

Hey, have you ever been on a date with a celebrity before?

No, I haven't. You're my first. You are, I'm sorry, you are stunning.

Sorry, this is a little difficult. I feel like I'm having two conversations at the same time.

I knew it! I knew you were a worm like water. Same.

So Janet, I mean normally we ask our guests what their relationship is with Riddles. We obviously don't get returned guests. People kind of get a vibe with the show. They say thank you though, thank you. But it's been years since we last spoke. Has your relationship with Riddles changed in the last few years?

I think if anything, my relationship with Riddles has grown. It's deepened. It's galvanized. I feel great about it. I feel no less apt at solving Riddles, but I feel Look at fucking Dr. Library over here busting out the words. Yeah, I have Dr. Library.

Okay Adal, you just used Dr. and Library, so watch out college.

I have Dr. Library. And Dr. Library CPA. I also knew people's doctors.

I needed a third. Your timing couldn't be more perfect because this is actually the year that we love Riddles again. So we are all on the same page. Our love and appreciation for Riddles has only grown more and more over the year. And even better news, we're almost done with that. We're almost done with the year that we like Riddles.

Oh, okay. So I'm sneaking in just at the end before we hate Riddles again.

Buzzer beater. Buzzer beater.

We gave ourselves a lobotomy and now we love Riddles and we're all smiling and it feels great.

Wait, but I got asked a serious question. Have I only done your podcast once? I thought I'd done it twice.

It goes an hour and most people do end the podcast by saying, can we get two episodes out of that? Surely there must be an effort too.

More and better than I remember almost all of the guest appearances I've done to the degree where I think I've convinced myself that we recorded together in person and then sometime between then we recorded like streaming or we recorded together in person again or something. I don't know how I've done that, but I really have created. If this is my second appearance on Hey Riddle Riddle, something has happened to me. You've recorded with us in a dream. It might have been a beautiful dream.

Okay, I did just Google Janet Varney podcast guest, and this is an anecdote that she shares on a lot of podcasts.

And I could swear.

It looks like.

I will say Janet. I know I did it. I know I did it.

I remember all the worst things that happened to me too. Janet, I will say you've recorded, I think since quarantine you've recorded with Tabi Tavern.

I knew you were going to try to push Tavern on me as like your reasoning. I wish I'd gotten out in front of that faster because I was immediately going to follow up by saying, and don't try to tell me it's because I've seen you a couple of times because you also did my podcast. I know all of those. I can cite all of those.

It could have been a lot of things. You could have been mugged. A lot of people times they're like, Did your podcast be like, no, you probably went through something like violent and dramatic.

Give me your purse. It's like, oh, let me solve this. Okay. So the purse is like the mother? No.

I remember I was trying to get into the country. I had been abroad and the customs agent took me to a room and had a series of riddles that I had to solve.

Very common.

So it was you, but it wasn't your podcast. I just happened to engage with you in your regular jobs as customs agents.

Yes. Erin was wearing a mustache and JBC and I shaved her. Split a mustache. As is your custom.

As is your custom. I'm going to lean in just a little bit more to the mic and leaning back, leaning back.

So speaking of riddles, I found riddles and I went, wow, these are some of the most difficult, ridiculous riddles I've ever found. And then I went, why not tonight? You know what? Let's do this together. Maybe with one extra brain we can also do that.

Maybe with a doctor library we'll be able to get through these things that immediately sound to me like problems in a class in school. Exactly. There's a point at which they become so complicated that you're like, oh no, you're trying to fool me. This is education. Don't you dare.

So I'm going to do some warm-ups before we get into the really difficult ones.

I licked my cousin's lollipop. He told me, stop it, John.

Do, do, re, do. Do, re, mi, re, do. And then we're good.

I found a little kitty and the kitty had 10 titties.

Okay. So these are listeners submitted. They're from Razz. They, them. And these are riddles that Razz wrote for their D&D campaign and they're themed. I like the sound of this razz.

You said razz they then? Are you sure it wasn't them saying razz them? Because I'm fully capable of razzing them.

Yeah, do like a fun little razz.

Alright, let's see. Let's assume that you're from Philadelphia.

He has a lot of material in Philadelphia.

Mainly Philadelphia. Softball, softball. Any rust belt city, it's a little softball.

No Razz is super sweet in their emails, so let's leave them alone. Alright, so here are the themed riddles from Razz. Silver maiden, pearl of light, shifting yet the same. A sister, present, yet out of sight. Pray tell, what is her name?

Erin, I'm onto your little game. Those are Led Zeppelin lyrics.

Damn it! Get out of here, Adal! No, honestly. And I would have gotten away with it too if it hadn't been for the god of my podcast.

Your Zeppelin Dar is firing on all cylinders because that is spot on.

Zeppelin? I know that you only date members of Led Zeppelin. My Led Zeppelin Dar is unreal. Let me set you up. I know a few bottoms.

Any guesses? Yeah, I'm going to say oyster.

Okay, I like that guess a lot, but no. I mean, I need to hear it again. Of course. Silver Maiden, Pearl of Light.

Japes and Varney, when you hear this, please think of Led Zeppelin singing this.

I can't focus on the riddle. Silver Maiden, Pearl of Light, Shifting yet the same, A sister present yet out of sight, Pray tell what is her name. So, I would just focus, like, what are some things that, like, create, not, this one doesn't necessarily create life, but kind of light, it reflects light?

How, I mean, listen, hearing it the second time, I gotta say oyster. Come on! Yeah, pretty good, huh? Who's the sister out of sight?

What about a chandelier, Erin?

A clam?

I like that. You're getting, but I would say think bigger.

Okay Erin, what about a wall-to-wall mirror?

No.

Okay, you could have said close.

It's a tiny bit closer, but still not close. Sister out of sight.

Okay, so you think bigger than a chandelier?

Silver Maiden. Is it a giant menorah? The beginning of this is more helpful than the second half. Silver Maiden, Pearl of Light. It changes, but it's still I wish I wait. I wish I might. Silver Maiden, Pearl of Light. I'm on your wavelength. This is very cool. This is a great warm-up for me.

I feel very warm.

It's just like the guests to come on and do way better than us. But Janet was on the cover of December's issue of Escape Room aficionados, to be fair.

That's right. But also I was smoking a cigar because I was also doing the I had a joint it was a joint cover thing. Yeah.

And our own source anger was sitting on your lap. That's right. I'd like to see a scene. JPC, you are the sun. Janet, you are the moon. And Erin, you are the sun and the moon's parent. And you are you are having a chat with them about maybe life and what to expect as they get older.

Can I go? Can I just go?

No. You can't go wearing my Led Zeppelin t-shirt. Thanks.

Okay, yeah. Your Led Zeppelin t-shirt.

Oh, I'm sorry. Hey, guess what? It's daytime. I'm going to borrow her stuff and she won't know. Thanks.

I do know. I see you. You just have one school drop-off that is peaceful. Please.

Could you just drop us off? Could you just drop us off like a couple hundred light years away from school and then we'll just walk?

I would actually love that also. Are you embarrassed by me?

No.

What? No. Yeah. No. No.

We love your huge white beard and your flowing white robe. You're so cool. Super cool.

I'm cool.

I create the whole universe.

Oh my gosh, it's winter but you have sandals on. That's awesome. We're not going to hear about that in home ec. You don't like my sandals?

I created the whole universe in like six days. And you don't think that's cool? Look, I made a giraffe. This is hilarious. Oh no, really?

Yeah, you know what? You have to stop leaning so hard onto the giraffe thing. Like, yes, it's very funny and hilarious and cool.

Look at this, a puffer fish.

That's funny too. Every time you show me one of these things, you get it way too close and it burns up. I have so many millions of dead giraffes in me, and that takes an emotional toll.

Yeah. Yeah. And I have, you know, a lot of people who just worship me. I guess I started out that I was going to be complaining, but then I realized I didn't have that much to complain about.

Okay.

All right.

I'm just going to drop you off. Well, one of you hurts people's eyes and the other one of you causes periods. So I guess have a good day. I don't cause periods. Yeah. It's something like that. I don't really, the women's bodies are gross. I don't really look into it too much.

God, thank you so much for coming into the parent-teacher conference. I just want to talk to you about your daughters.

What did they do?

Well, one of them is having a lot of flare-ups in class, and one of them feels like they're only sort of half there a lot of the time. So I don't know what's going on at home. Is there anything at home that might be going on? Is it just you, or do you have someone else with you?

That's a little rude. No, I'm on my own, okay?

Well, you created me, so What does that mean?

Is this my fault?

Well, you make no mistakes. You told me you make no mistakes.

I know, I don't make any mistakes. I did make it so my moon kid causes periods and my sun one's gonna explode after a while. I guess that's sort of a mistake.

Okay, I would just suggest bringing down the hammer a little bit more around the household. Like really set boundaries and really lay out the law.

You know what? Fuck this. Flood. New flood. I'm starting over.

Whoa, it's me. Flood.

Bud, get down there.

I cause periods instead.

Splash. Hey, God. Nice to meet you.

Steve. Oh, man. What does the moon do? Tides and periods?

It's the moon plus the tides. It's the tides that are the ones that really cause the periods.

Well, the moon causes periods, but it also causes waxing and waning, which is very convenient.

Remember that these riddles are themed, and there's two more. Ready? Great.

Oh wait, so they all have the same theme?

Perfect.

So the next answer will also be the moon.

Kind of. Thanks for blowing that for me.

You went to the Martin Scorsese School of Theme. What if he's a gangster?

I want to hear his voiceover. I want to hear his air monologue.

I'm laughing, singing, skipping along. I'm in such a state of bliss. Why might I just mimic the cow in that song and vault that celestial mist?

So in the song, the cow jumps over the moon.

Oh moon.

You got it. Over the moon. Yes.

Is it?

Yep. Should I spread these out?

All right. Anyone else have a guess? Oh, the Cheryl and Fen movie, Two Moon Junction.

I would love it if it was and you pulled that out right now. That would be amazing. Can you imagine?

I'm sorry. My Zoom froze. I want to say Two Moon Junction.

All right. None of you got it. So this might still be a challenge.

Okay.

Two twins living cheek to cheek. Hiding for most of the day. Sometimes, however, they take a peek in a most improper way. If you should see this peeking act, you might cry out in rage. Incidentally, you both should be smacked and blame it on their age.

If I saw someone pooping, would I cry out in a rage? Probably not. That's not going to be my gut reaction.

This is most improper.

I think Janet said something that was definitely on the right track.

Oh, is it like mooning someone?

Yeah, it's mooning someone.

That's all Janet. I just listened to what she said and then I just said it louder.

Congratulations, Adal, you count as yours. Good business. This guy gets a promotion. I'm so sorry. Let's advance him to the top of the corporate ladder.

We joke, but as I'm sure you say every time you read a listener's riddles, those are great. And I would be hard pressed to come up with anything as clever and as poetic. So those were terrific.

Well, Janet, you're going to hate this next segment, where it's Janet comes up with the riddles. So, oh boy.

Can mine all be the moon? I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing that I would have to attack on and come up with more stuff.

Thank you Raz. Janet said they were great and I agree. Congratulations Raz on Great Riddles.

Yeah Raz thank you so much that was fantastic. Yeah Raz do something about that big crack of the Liberty Bell. I do want to see just the briefest of moments. I'm not even going to call this a scene. It's going to be a moment. JPC, you are Dean Martin. Dean Martin. And you are coming up with the lyrics for That's Amore, like 30 seconds before you have to go on stage and debut the song. You overslept and you forgot to leave it.

Okay. Okay, let's see. Cocaine? The older version of cocaine? Okay, here we go. Umora. Umora, I love. Yeah, I love it. Poppin' when the moon hits your eye like a big stack of dye. No, that's Too nerdy. We can't let them know I'm a D&D guy. Pizza Pie. I'm Italian. Why not? Okay. Moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie. That's a moray. When the floor hits the door. Guess what's in store? More a moray. Let's see. When the knob hits your key fob. That's a moray. Okay. What else? What else?

Your mic is on.

My mic is on? Your mic is on.

All the nerds have bum rushed to the front. They're so thrilled you're a D&D guy.

When the voice hits my brain, oh I think I've been saved. That's amore, right?

I'm definitely having voices.

Perfect.

When an eel bites your heel, that's amore.

Well I say, well I say, we go to an early break and then when we come back I will destroy you with these new kind of riddles that I think will truly be the end of the show. I'm so sorry, I gotta be honest. I read these and I went, uh-oh, how is this going to go? So let's go on a break and then we'll be back and stretched and ready for these riddles. I don't want to come back. No, I didn't do a good job selling that.

Let's go to break. JPC or Dean Martin again, and you just found out Sammy Davis Jr.

died. Uh, when my friend hits the grave, we'll go to a break.

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Speaking of reggae, can I just say, you should be glad that I'm not Ronald reggae. That guy is insane.

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Adal, you're back. Thank God. Thank God. Hi Adal.

Hello. I should have been Ray Connie Britton. It was right there.

Oh, I love Ray Connie Britton. I love that.

I love that. Next time.

Hey Adal, hey Erin, I got bone to pick with the two of you. I'm sitting this one out. Alright Adal, I got it, but next time.

So remember how I told you guys that I couldn't really quiet my mind, I was having trouble relaxing, I was just going in circles, in low circles, circles spinning, circles spinning, and the two of you said, my man, what you gotta do is eat as much bread as you possibly can. So I went into that bread space, I ate every loaf of bread that I could find. First of all, I felt awful. Hey Riddle.

Now it just feels like thoughts are running in endless circles in my mind, and I feel like with the stresses of this last year, it's more important than ever to practice living healthier and happier lives, and that means not taking JPC's bait. I'm sorry, Erin, you go ahead.

Hey JPC. Okay. Headspace is one of the most science-backed meditation apps in the world, proving meditation works. A study proves in just two weeks Headspace can reduce your stress by 14%. 14%!

Oh, so Headspace is the convenient dose of meditation, mindfulness, and sleep exercises to relieve stress and anxiety and help you get a good night's sleep all in one app, make it easy to catch your breath, and make time for your mental health. And Breadspace isn't something that exists, it's something that I said will get yelled at by literally every Panera employee.

Exactly.

Okay, okay.

JPC, I use Headspace right before bed. It helps so much to unwind from my day and use some of their sleep meditations. I can't recommend it enough.

And you know, Erin and I can't control what happens in the world with JPC in it, but with Headspace, you can learn to take control of your own mental health and choose how you respond. So JPC, I want to apologize how I talked to you earlier. I just used Headspace, I calmed down, and you're my friend and I love you. You know what?

I think that this is very good for me. I'm just going to make a quick stop at a corner bakery. I'm just going to do some of my bread space. No, no, no, no. I'm not going to. What I'm going to do is I'm going to find some Headspace at Headspace.com slash Riddle and get one month free of their entire meditation library. This is the best Headspace offer available. So go to Headspace.com slash Riddle today. That is Headspace.com slash Riddle.

Actually, can you pick me up some honey grain?

Adal.

I'm just saying all this talk about bread and I'm hungry. I'm just saying.

I got bread blind when I go in there so whatever you get is what you get my man.

Adal.

Adal. Bread blind.

I'm just saying. Hey Adal hey Erin I got a bone to pick with you.

Yeah I got a bone to pick with the two of you. What is it? What's going on? So you know how I told you that around the house I was looking for kind of a place to lounge and be comfortable and you guys told me that I should build an all-fort? So I took all the pillows out of every room in the house and I stacked them up and I made a little drawbridge and then Mariah came home from her real job and she said, what the f*** are you doing? I left you home to take care of the dog.

Hey Erin, this is my bad. I actually did send him allfort.com.

I did too, but I actually thought of a better solution just now.

Well you and I know the better solution because we have furniture from all form.

Yeah, we love our all form couch.

Oh, Allform. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You guys are talking about the company that comes from Helix Mattresses, except now they're leaving the bedroom and they start making sofas, and they just launched a new company called Allform, and they're already making the best sofas in the game. That Allform?

Yes. Yes. I mean, for starters, it's the easiest way you can customize a sofa using premium materials at a fraction of the cost of traditional stores, you idiot. Man.

And you can pick your fabric in its spill, stain, and scratch resistant. And I have a dog and these are the easiest couches to clean, I'm obsessed.

Okay, so they've also got armchairs and love seats all the way up to an eight seat sectional, so there's something for everyone. You know how many pillows it took? I had to go to a neighbor's house, just had to ask for their pillows just to build a love seat. Oh my, this is so much easier. We're ruining your life.

Actually, JPC, they not only have armchairs, but your birthday was literally yesterday, so what I did is I ordered you a parm chair. What it is, it's an all-form armchair, but you can eat Parmesan cheese in it.

That's all of their chairs.

Not only just like Helix is my favorite mattress I've ever owned, Allform is my favorite couch I've ever owned. I built my own with two shea lounges. I don't know how to spell that, but I know my feet and body like it.

And the good news is they offer financing and flexible payment plans, so an amazing sofa is never far away. They even offer a forever warranty. Forever. Literally forever.

If you currently own like a futon or something, it's time to grow up, it's time to become an adult, I did so at the age of 39, and I got myself an all-form couch. It's adult furniture you're gonna love, it looks great, it's comfy, it's the best.

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What are you going to do with the palm chair I got you? Eat it?

And we're back. I have to pee a little so the second half of this episode is going to be really manic. Let's do this. All right. These are from Sandy Goldman. Sorry, Erin, who? Sandy Goldman.

Sorry, what was the first name?

Sandy Goldman.

Erin, I still can't hear it.

You're messing with me? us in emails if we have interesting jobs to tell you, and he does the storyboards for Rick and Morty. So that is a very cool and interesting job.

Yeah, that's a talent. You just outclassed us. Not cool, Sandy. Not cool. You heard it here, you heard it here. You made us all look very dumb.

You want your riddles read on the show? Go up and harass Erin at one of her live shows. Go up to her and say, hey, I sent you an email two years ago. Never been read on the show. My name's Sandy. And then she'll have to do it, so I guess it works.

It sounds like Janet, but it's a pickle version of Janet. Let's get that happening.

I think they do a pickle thing on the show already. You know what? Probably not. Nobody googles it.

I think there's a cucumber.

Cornichon too many syllables.

Cornichon Barney? That sounds like a French ambassador.

Can we slip like a Sharon Beef onto the show? I think that people would enjoy that. A little Erin Keif character.

And just real quick, we're well versed in Hollywood. Storyboard artists, they write the show, right?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, of course.

They're showrunners. If it's on the board, it's in the show.

That, now that could be, you could argue that. It could be like the Lost in Translation thing. Like, I didn't see that in the script. They're like, nope, it was a late ad. It was there. I saw it. And then it goes to the animators. Bada bing bada boom that's amore.

I've seen a lot of things and a lot of things like on television or in movies and I thought a hundred people must have signed off on this. A hundred people must have been like I think this is a good idea. So I think you could get Sharon Beef in there. I think you could slip it in.

Every episode of Rick and Morty is art by committee. Twitch plays Rick and Morty.

All right, well Sandy, thank you so much for these because I truly love them and we'll see how everyone does. Sandy, I'm scared. It's okay. We'll unplug the show.

I'm very intimidated by Sandy right now.

A while ago, he says, hey y'all, a while ago I came across- Oh, never mind.

I'm not intimidated by you at all. It's very warm. And he knew that that would disarm me. You got me, Sandy. You got me.

A while ago I came across my new favorite type of Riddy slash Puzzy. Word avalanches. Have you guys heard of these? I have dangerous. Yeah, it's very.

I feel like I might know it when I hear it.

A word avalanche. Is that like a word search where all the letters are like really crammed into the very bottom of it?

You can barely see them because they're overlapping. I wish.

There are words that you're supposed to have P so they can know which way to dig to get to the surface. That's true.

Yes. So Adal, Sandy thinks that you especially will like these. So we'll see.

Oh, they're puns.

Yeah. Well, kind of. Well, not at all actually. I wonder if it is kind of, we'll see. A word avalanches a phrase or something that is made mostly of homophones, creating something that sounds like a silly repetition of one word, sound, or short phrase over and over and over. For example, well, farewell, welfare. Each riddle will be a sentence or a phrase that has the victims, I assume, Adal and JPC, because Sandy knew I would read these, but didn't predict that Janet would be coming back on the show. Again, we'll have to rephrase these into a word avalanche that mean the same thing. Okay.

Definitely like school.

Exactly. A cool substitute. I like it. The prompt for well, farewell, welfare would be, damn, goodbye to my health and happiness. Okay, yes.

You know what? This is finally clicking because Janet said like school and I'm like, this is like school, except unlike school, I have no idea how to cheat. Like if this had been normal school, I would have been cheating from day one. Three years ago I would have been cheating and I just don't know how.

I don't know how, but it feels like you've been cheating. I actually am going to pee really quick, but I don't want to stop recording and I would like you all to time me. I will be right back. Keep talking.

Just to create a word avalanche of my own for YouTube, because I think I understand what's going on. So to go back to Sandy, if Danny Zuko saw a group of fish going to an Institute of Learning, he might say, It's cool, it's cool. Now I'm going to admit that Reese is the movie I've seen the most in my life. There's a moment where Rizzo shoves Sandy in front of Danny. He wasn't expecting to see her. And she's like, Danny, what's wrong with you? He goes, school, baby. You know how it is. Rockin' and rollin'.

I just want to make sure that you think that anything that a character says in a movie is their catchphrase. That just becomes their catchphrase. Okay, 100%. He's got a ton of catchphrases in that movie.

You know how Leonardo DiCaprio's catchphrase in Titanic is, I'll never let go?

Totally misthought that and thought that the person's catchphrase was just the character saying the title of the movie. I like just twisted it in my head so I was about to be like, yeah, you know, like Holly Hunter's like, I guess we're going to be raising her or something. But that's not what you were saying.

And she looks straight at the camera.

That's not what you were saying at all.

Janet, I'm almost 100% sure, maybe not 100%, 99% sure that Danny Zuko does not say, it's cool baby, you know how it is, rockin' and rollin' and whatnot. But from this point forward, I will always say that out loud whenever I watch groups.

Wait, I think he might. I think he's, I've been walking around saying that he says that, like, and I know it seems like how could I Really? I think he might.

Here's the funny thing.

Cause that's in my head.

Here's the funny thing. I'm going to do something and nobody can make fun of me for this, but I have that clip from Grease on my phone.

Why? Why? Asking why is not the same as making fun of it, but why? Why?

Okay, so we're going to listen to this clip. We may have to cut out this clip, do the copyright, but we're going to listen to this clip very quickly. We might have to cut it out and then we'll be right back.

We can use it if we also say that this is a high school production of Grease.

Penny, what are you doing here? I want you to go back to Australia. We had a change in front of him. Thank you.

That's cool, baby. Coming in the house.

Oh no. Oh no.

Oh no. Oh no.

Oh no.

Does it feel? Oh no.

Kasey cut out everything I said before the clip.

No, no, no, no, no.

Janet, Janet, I'm going to carve out some time. to formally apologize to you. I've seen Greece a hundred times. I've never caught the whatnot. Janet, you're a hundred percent right. I owe you my life.

You know why? Because you were still puzzling over your early understanding of the Australian accent vis-a-vis, we had a change of plins. Plins is like the first time as a kid your life should wait. Because I feel like I saw that before I saw Crocodile's N.T.

I wish more people just did that.

Can I sit out the rest of the episode for being wrong? No, wait, I was wrong too. Please let me sit out.

We all want to sit out, but that's not how this works. So Sandy gave another example, which I was going to have you guys solve, but this one's impossible. It would have taken forever. So here's another example. This would be the prompt. A white supremacist musician is tasked with determining the rules to a marathon that takes place in a biodome on the moon. To determine the racer's positioning at the starting line, he decides to review the files of each person entered and make no sweeping judgment.

Wait, this is another word, Avalanche?

Yeah, this is an impossible one.

Because the first one was like, say goodbye to your health. And then this one was like a paragraph.

Yeah, this one's long. So it's racist, racist, want to try JPC?

Well, I was racist, the operative word at the beginning, but yeah, go ahead.

So it's a Toby Keith. It's a Toby Keith Keith. Keith in the face.

Yeah, we're really stuck on the Toby Keith thing. It is race, but as you were.

Kenny Chesney.

A racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist, racist.

Erin, when you said that these were going to be hard, this is akin to handing a second grader some trigonometry homework.

Please little girl, bring them home.

And she pushes up her glasses.

I definitely want to see that movie, which means I need to see a short scene. Adal, you are the person who hands over the portfolio to Erin, the little girl. And JPC, you are the brother of one of the astronauts who for some reason is hysterically there to freak out about it.

Excuse me, are you Bethany Sullivan?

Who's asking?

I'm with NASA, ma'am, and we have a bit of a situation. Now, I've heard from your teacher that you're the best in class.

Yes, that's what I say. I'm the best in class.

Well, we're going to need your expertise. We have some astronauts who are, how do I say this, they're experiencing some difficulties in space.

Say no more, let's go. I'm going to need a booster seat, a carton of Red Bull. And a bunch of chalk for later.

Give this little girl a booster seat, the Red Bull and the chalk for later. My brother's dying in space.

Sidewalk chalk for fun.

Anything you want, anything you need, just bring my brother home.

Right away, ma'am. And while I go and grab that stuff, I want you to meet, this is Commander Armstrong. His brother is up in space right now.

Sir, we're going to get your butter home.

Thank you.

If it's the last thing I do, I will get your butter home from space.

Thank you so much.

Onward! And there's a montage of her doing it. She's wearing those 60s horn-rimmed glasses. She takes a nap. She has a little snack. She gets them home from space. She throws a tantrum.

Moments were seen, moments where I did feel a little bit like she was evolving into a Martin Scorsese title character.

Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to solve problems.

There's a body in the trunk of her car and she stares at the camera.

I bet you're wondering how I got here. They didn't tell me how addictive cocaine was, either.

Boy, was it. You're walking through the school cafeteria to get the class and your date is like, I thought you said you were a student.

Exactly. All right, let's actually do these. I'm going to give you hints. We're going to figure it out. But did you guys like how I bought us time by doing a theme?

Yeah. Very good.

We've only listened to examples of this one. Oh, God. Erin, we failed to ask. I feel so rude. How was your pee?

You know what? It was kind of funny because my boyfriend heard that I had to pee. He can hear me. And I started running to the bathroom. And he pretended that he had to go to the bathroom too and started running there too to stress me out. He was like, me too. I go to the bathroom. And I was like, no. And he was like, I'm just kidding.

I thought I'd say that he like lifted the toilet cover seat and not because he wouldn't lift the second seat because that's weird unless you were going to be standing up and then taken out a little pile of toilet paper and was sort of, you know, escorting you to speed up your experience, not prank you.

It's not always as cute as you think it is for your partner to leave you a little toilet paper pile. I'm not saying that I know anyone who has dealt with this issue, but actually it does cause big fights.

We actually had a discussion that it's sort of romantic when you have to pee on top of someone else's pee. Like you pee and then the other person's pee and you do one flush right after the other.

Oh, Erin, so this isn't therapy. This is a Zoom recording for a professional podcast. Oh, are you sure? Not like secrets you whisper into a journal.

This is my pee Zoom where people will be talking about pee? Okay, I am very late for something else.

Janet, is this similar to working for Nickelodeon?

Yeah. The guy who sketches crossbreed dogs is good enough for now. Okay. Yes.

The doodler, the doodle, the doodle doodle, the doodler of doodles.

I knew this would happen. And that's why I picked these.

The doodle doodler. It's doodle doodler. Definitely doodle doodle.

More than just doodle. That's the full name for the dog. The labradoodle doodler.

The labradoodle doodler's laboring over noodling.

That avalanche came to a skidding stop.

The labradoodle doodler. It's not doodler, it's the The labradoodle diddler.

What's the name of something that someone would it was just a single sketch. The word that we're going for. The doodle. So the labradoodle doodle is the first two words.

The labradoodle doodle doodler.

No.

Aren't we talking about the man?

Yeah, but think of another way to say man.

Is this a bad time to say that there was a serial killer in San Francisco at some point called The Doodler?

I would say that this is the exact right time for that.

100% serious.

It is never the wrong time.

Please know that there was a true crime podcast that came out called The Doodler. And, unfortunately, I don't think it ever addressed, like, you gotta start out at the beginning and be like, okay guys, this is a big thing we gotta get over. Big hurdle. We are calling this podcast a doodler. That is what he was called, but this is very serious subject matter.

Did they ever catch him?

Jeff Bridges played in the movie.

Oh God.

The doodler.

The doodler.

The labradoodle doodler.

So it's just, it's a labradoodle doodle, and then think of another way to say man or guy.

Dude.

Yeah.

The labradoodle doodle doodle doodle.

Yeah, you kind of got it.

I'm a labradoodle doodle doodle.

That's the whole thing?

The labradoodle doodle doodle doodle doodle doodle.

Stuck a knife in her neck and called himself the doodler.

The labradoodle doodle doodle do.

And I sound like a fool and I'm sorry. Oh, the labradoodle doodle doodle do. I like that.

That's great. So just to backtrack slightly, and I'm very curious. Janet, was this killer, was it like the sidewalk folk who have a little easel and they'll draw somebody on a skateboard with a big head kind of thing?

I'm going to have to refer to the internet for that. I'll be honest with you, I know a little bit about this case. Oh, good. Big true kind of thing. The reason why they never caught the doodler is because they are yet to commit a crime. They were working backwards on him. They had the name, and they were like, if we find a perp that matches the name, this is what he'll be. But so far, there's no crime.

It's what we call double jeopardy. The nickname was given due to the perpetrator's habit of sketching his victims prior to their sexual encounters and slayings by stabbing. Interesting. You claim not to know anything about this, but yet you knew that it was stabbing. There are many ways to kill a person. Many ways to kill a person. You knew it was stabbing. And let's just sing a couple.

I want to see a scene. Janet, you are a labradoodle doodler. JPC, you are a labradoodle. Erin, you are the labradoodle's handler, and you've paid for sort of like the equivalent of a Sears family portrait for your dog, but sketched not photos.

Okay, and I just want to I'm taking it a little bit longer because I really want people to get that it's hypoallergenic, and that's kind of hard to convey in a sketch, but I think I'm getting there. Take all the time you need. Oh, thank you. She's the light of my life, aren't you?

Wait, let me ask you a question. You're just not gonna fuck me. No, this is- Why'd you bring me here? I thought we were going to a labradoodle doodler.

No, excuse me. She's painting us, sweetheart. She's painting us. You're disgusting. I'm so sorry. I have the horniest dog in town.

First of all, you don't, okay?

I would love for you to not just apologize for your dog being horny. I think we've skipped past the part that he's speaking. About his horniness.

You're Zeppelin Dara's officer. Go back to the mall.

Yeah, it's horny dog Dara, but what you have, my man.

I've got, I'm going to have to start from scratch. I have to start with the story. I have to sketch out. I'm a storyboard artist. I should have mentioned that. So I'm going to have to storyboard that whole process before I feel comfortable ending with the panel in which I myself am shown sketching. It's going to be very meta. And yes, I will make love with you.

That dog. So how do we feel? Quick Hey Riddle Riddle meeting. How do we feel about new merch that says, I have the horniest dog in town?

But you came up with it, Erin. Alright Erin, it's December 15th. You only have a hundred more vetoes.

And I will use them all. Alright, next one. We have a few more and I'd love to get through them because these are very impressive. Why not? To surrender a French city to the Velvet Underground singer and his pair of toilets.

Lou Reed? to Aloo? Toulouse? Aloo? Aloo? HUH? Aloo-reed. Just aloo-reed. Aloo-reed. Very underground.

Do it like a nickel. Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse? Toulouse?

You got it! Wow.

Can I just say Janet, that this was the podcast equivalent of that janitor solving that math problem on the board in that movie?

You had me a janitor because it has Janet in it.

Wow. She's our janitor.

You're thinking of a we bought a zoo.

We bought a zoo. We bought a loo. Can he stop smoking please?

That was great. I said it was great because I got it. That's a classic case of complimenting something because you yourself solved it.

No, hyperbole. That was maybe the most impressive moment of actual riddle flogging on the show so far. In the history of the show, not this episode.

All right, here we go. The thing I have is going to agitate this prickly plant from Hey Riddle Riddle's home state. Our show started in Chicago.

Hi Riddle Thistle Thistle. So it's not my aloe, Angela?

You guys sound like that Danny K. movie where he's trying to remember where the poison is. The pestle with the poisons and the vessels with the pestle.

But we say Illinois in it? Thistle Thistle Thistle.

And then agitate, yep. Thistle-anoi. Thistle-anoi. Thistle-anoi. This. Illinois. Thistle-anoi.

This Illinois.

Illinois. And then one more word.

Can you repeat the whole thing one more time?

The thing I have is going to add to this. This Illinois, this thistle. Yeah. This Illinois, this.

This Illinois, this thistle.

No, you need one more word. This Illinois.

This Illinois, this Illinois thistle.

You got it.

That was not me getting it. That was me saying everything, everyone said something and then I put those things together. I found it like you got it. After you told me exactly how to put them together.

Janet, you know that thing, I think like the lead singer of Tool has this, Maynard Keenan, whatever his name is. You know where they, people can like hear in colors. I think you think and word avalanches. Yeah. You have avalanches-thesia. And I mean that in a bad way.

Yes. I take it in a bad way. I take it in a very bad way.

All right, we got three more. A Man Vandalizes an Important Sign for a film starring Mark Wahlberg in a progressive Massachusetts senator.

Oh boy. I thought the beginning was already the answer. What was it? A Man Vandalizes?

A Man Vandalizes is an important sign for a film starring Mark Wahlberg in a progressive Massachusetts senator.

Graffiti. Graf- Graf- Graf- Firdy. Fear. Roller coaster. Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf- Graf To mock, I'm mocking mock with a mock. Ex-mock the mock. Mock five. Let me hear this again.

You sound like I put a bunch of peanut butter in your mouth and you're trying to get it out. A man vandalizes an important sign for a film starring Mr. Wahlberg in a progressive Massachusetts Senator.

I don't know. So it's a movie starring Mark Wahlberg. So it's not Mark Wahlberg.

No, it's Mark. It's Mark Wahlberg. There's no actual title to a movie in here. It's an important sign for a film, like when there's a sign for a film. Perhaps over a theater. There you go. And then vandalizes. You could key something, like when you key something. It's the other one. It's more of like a blanking your territory. A tagging.

Oh, marking your, okay, well. We had that, right? Marking. And it's Ed Marky is the end.

Marking Mark, something Marky Mark. So this one's, I think this one might be my favorite because it's really dense. So it's also very dense.

So by definition we should be able to solve this. Walk us through it a little bit at a time.

He and then the word for vandalism.

So is it he marked? With an S. He marks.

He marks. That's how it starts. And then the next word is important.

Important.

Yeah, well, it's the word that's the important key. Yes, it's key. Key marks.

Key.

And then the name.

Mark.

But I would say maybe the name he went by when he was deaf.

Marky Mark. Hey Riddle.

I want to see a quick scene. This will be fairly short so we can hear the rest of these, Erin, because these are outstanding. Erin, Erin, Erin. The three of you are going to be three Bostonians with the accent and you're all friends and you're hanging out and you're all gossiping about Mark Wahlberg.

He thinks just because he's from Dorchester that he's better than us and now he's rich and now he thinks he can come back here and show off all of his wealth. Unbelievable.

How dare he? He's not like us. By the way, I'm sorry, I just got back from my semester at Rob.

Oh great, now you're showing off. I don't know how to do an accent from Boston, so I'm just going to kind of fly blind here.

I could try to get into a Boston accent. I was in France, as you know, for so long, for the summer, and now I'm back.

Yeah, you keep talking about it. You think you're fancy all of a sudden because you went overseas?

It's truly not fancy over there. We just, you know, we wake up at 11 o'clock. We drink our French word for coffee. We eat our French word for bread. Look, I didn't learn the language, but the accent really rubbed off on me.

You've changed, man. I've seen you throw up in a Dunkin' Donuts iced coffee cup. You think you're better all of a sudden? Fuck you.

They don't have iced coffee in the fans, obviously.

I don't even get to say Walburgers.

Oh wait, hold on. Unseen.

Hey, France isn't that fancy because they got a Walburgers. That's how you do a Boston accent.

I had to put him in his class.

Is Marky Mark's version, is he covering the Beach Boys in Good Vibrations? What?

I don't think so.

You're like the janitor in the movie and they walk into the room and you're like, you got chalk and you're all over the board and they're like, this is an art history class. What the fuck are you doing? You're ruining this board with your questions. I'm solving history.

All right, we got two more.

Ready? Okay.

Sandy, these are great. Oh, I love them.

Wait, was Andy right? Adal, do you appreciate these for the sort of silliness?

A hundred percent. Yeah, any sort of wordplay I'm obsessed with. I will say that first one that Erin read was maybe the most daunting task I've ever heard.

Wait, Adal just said any sort of wordplay he's obsessed with. And he just said that grease, which is a one-word play, is his favorite thing. So I guess he's consistent.

One word play loves word play. And he also ends everything when he agrees with word.

I'm high all of a sudden. Behind that woman, a preacher walked by an advertisement for noodles.

Did you say a preacher or a creature?

A preacher. Behind that woman, a preacher walked by an advertisement for noodles.

Ramen. Amen. I wish it was ramen. No, it's not. Can we do like a fun pop-up? Can we do a fun pop-up that's like we serve ramen noodles in a church and we have everybody slurp and then we go ramen? Can we do that please?

Adal, I don't like crushing your dreams, so yes.

Word, word, word, word, word, word, word. There it is. There it is. And whatnot. Priest, Erin, is it priest? A preacher.

So, no, it's not priest. Pastor? Yeah, there you go.

He walked past that pastor. Now you're doing a Boston accent, Janet.

I got it!

That's all I needed.

I just needed to think of fathers.

You're going to take a left and then go a little bit farther towards the pastor with a cow's oar.

That is not a Boston accent. That is a slowly melting JFK. So walked by, passed, and the pasta, and then like a sign, or like a poster.

Wait a minute, that feels like it's one thing is not like the other.

I know. Slant rhyme, slant rhyme.

No, pastor the pastor. Pastor the pastor. Kill, kill.

Louis Pasteur was a pastor. So you can add in, past her, past her, a pastor. You're the ewer. I slipped in the ewer. We broke past. We passed you a pastor. Past er. And then it's like a person who can't remember what they're going to say. Past er. Past a poster.

Hey Riddle.

Oh God.

So Erin, I think we got all the parts. Yeah. Can you say it all together?

So behind the woman.

Uh-huh.

Past her, the pastor.

Uh-huh.

Walked by.

The in Louis Pasteur who became a pastor.

Louis. I just need to augment this. So behind the woman.

Past her. A preacher.

The pastor. And then walked by.

Past her. Past her, the pastor. Past.

The noodles.

The pasta.

And then the last word. Poster. Yep, there you go. Someone say it all in order.

Past her, the pastor. Past her. Past the poster. The pasta poster.

Yeah. Someone say it all together. Someone has to get it.

Louis Pasteur.

Past her. The pasta poster.

Oh, thank God. Great. Amen. One more. And this one is Actually, I'm not going to say anything.

Lisa Did you just fast forward? Come on, that's not fair. I've never seen a person fast forward before.

You just fucked up the audio.

She might have been rewinding. Yeah, I rewinding to yesterday when I was reading this riddle. Casey, as a joke, have Erin's audio out of sync for the rest of the episode. That sounds exhausting. Poor Casey. Okay. And that's my plug for the episode. Lisa Kudrow urinated a piece of air rifle ammunition that came from a Massachusetts town.

Is she okay?

She's dead. She's not okay.

That killed her.

You were so close. You kind of got it. I think you might have got it. Lisa Kudrow.

Phoebe.

More than just our character on Friends, but whatever.

Yeah, the comeback's actually way better than Friends. Exactly. All right, so start with that comeback. The comeback?

Nope.

Okay, so Phoebe Peed.

Yeah. And then the town from Massachusetts.

Phoebe Peed.

There's a lot of Massachusetts-centric stuff happening here. I'm starting to think Sandy's from Massachusetts, I think.

Nobody tell her I'm from there too, and that's why I like things. Phoebe Peed. Yeah, you got it. Peabody. It's pretty much Peabody. And if you're from Massachusetts, we say Peabody. No, you're so close. Yeah, Phoebe peed Peabody and then air rifle ammunition. That's it. There you go. Phoebe peed Peabody.

That's a very fun one.

Did you know that the Arabic word for baby is Habibi? Yeah, so if Lisa Kudrow had a baby, it'd be Phoebe's Habibi, Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe Phoebe

A traditional Irish good morning to you.

The flirty, hurdy, gurdy David Mamet.

Dirty.

Dirty. Writes a lot of dirty lines in his plays. Sure.

Sexual persuasions in sexual persuasions in Chicago.

Something about a duck. So I guess now we have to pour all of our brains back into our heads and figure out a way for them to like harden back up into brain again. Not possible. Not possible.

That sounds like a lot of work.

I'm just not going to do it. The cerebral.

Oh no, this is really going to change Adal. The funny joke writing center square wrote a cascade of words

The Paul Lind laughing.

No, we got to go a little later, but it's impressive that you went even further back because it's not okay to even go as far back as I did, but his name is Bruce Valanche.

Oh, Valanche.

The Valanche avalanche.

That's what I'm trying for.

Adal adding ad-libbed dishes.

All right, we got to get out of here. Sandy says, I love these things. No, Erin, this is our life now. I expect you guys to either love them or hate them, but I hope they're fun or enjoyably infuriating. If they're fun, there's loads more with that. I think to all of the above. Yeah, right way. Here's what I'll say. Thank you, Sandy.

I think besides that first one, not the example, but the first one that you saw for us, besides that one, the rest of these might be my all-time number one riddles we've ever done.

Yeah. All right, here we go. Hold on. Hold on. Take all the time you need. Having been to the beach, Olivia Newton-John picked up her Oscar.

Grammy. Sandy, Sandy won a Grammy. Yeah, the Oscar's a Grammy.

No, I'm bringing in gold man. Sam bringing in Sandy Ann gold man. Sandy, Sandy, gold man. Sandy, gold man.

Sandy, gold man. The macho man's savage. Sandy Sandy, Gold Man, and Randy.

But the Oscar is in the freezer. Sandy, Cold Man, Gold Man. Oh, Cold Man, Gold Man.

I've never watched people work harder to get their souls ejected out of their body. I've never seen people work harder to shoot their souls out of their noses.

But JPC, can we agree that when Santa Claus and Frosted Snowmen are together, they are Cold Man and Sax?

Uh, veto. I got 99 more vetoes.

I want to see one final scene and then we'll do a plug. Final scene. Um, uh, JPC, you are, Erin, I don't think Erin's been in a scene.

Oh, Adal, you haven't been in a scene. You put yourself in it.

Okay, so I am Santa, Janet, you are Frosty the Snowman, and this is a very quick advertisement for our law firm, Coldman and Saks. Ho ho ho! Has this ever happened to you?

Hee hee hee! I sound like the Pillsbury Doughboy! Alright great, that was a great take. I think we want to focus more on the law for it. I don't remember what I sound like. Do I sound like this?

Sorry, I keep taking the hat off and then putting it back on and that kind of, uh, fucks with her memory.

Yeah, that resets the memory. Don't do that.

Sorry. Becca, we've been here all fucking day. I think that was as good as they're ever gonna get it.

Alright, print it.

Oh wait, but I also have a, I also have a bowling alley and my belly shakes like a certain substance. Uh, and my partner is jealous of me. Is he pitching us another business?

We're packing up the camera. Jelly much, jelly belly belly jelly. You took the hat off again.

Don't tell anybody else, you're our favorite guest of all time. Do you have anything to plug for the listeners?

I think we should plug the Hey Riddle Riddle show at Sketchfest coming up on Sunday, no, yep, Sunday, January 8th. I'm not looking at anything, this is from memory.

That is incredibly impressive.

Sunday, January 9th. The Sunday's the night. Sunday, January 9th. 4pm. Gateway theater. The gateway to comedy heaven.

It's Cookie Monster. He's here. He came.

He's gonna announce gateways to heaven if it's comedy heaven.

We have not announced our special guest but we might as well say it here on the podcast.

It is Cookie Monster. And he will be there with Chewbacca and he will take a crap. So, cookie woofy dookie.

And if you want tickets Adal, if you call me in the middle of the night with one of these, I'm going to be so pissed.

It is, uh Erin, you know what's happening.

Hey, heyriddleriddle.com slash live. And that is And we do slash live instead of slash live because we think our live shows are kind of like our live shows.

Oh, that's so beautiful.

Yeah. And we also say That's an expression of love.

We wear little bands on our wrists that are yelling and say, live strong. Oh, I love it. Just to support our live shows. I love it. JPC, anything for you to plug? Nope. Erin, anything for you, Flug? Nope.

Just go back and listen to Janet's first episode, too, because that's one of my first. So good.

You know what? I'll say Janet's second episode is good as well, so if you just keep scrolling through the catalog and tell me about that second episode, that one rocks.

We will say you can only access it in your dreams. Also, the song from the first episode, The Three Mommies Making Salad, I sing around, my fianc and I sing that around the house constantly. Janet, do you remember that song?

No, I don't remember The Three Mommies Making Salad.

Three mommies making salad. This is in a beat bag. You all created that. I do have one thing to plug. I'd like to join everyone else in saying nothing. But I do have to plug, I was a guest on a podcast called Cruise Control. Cruise spelled C-R-E-W-S. Erin, I believe you were on that as well. So check out my episode of Cruise Control, wherever you find podcasts.

And since no one else said it, I'll go ahead and say happy birthday JPC.

Alright, go ahead Adal, whatever you are. This is nice.

The day after your birthday?

That was a trap. That was a trap.

J.P. J.P.

J.P. J.P.

J.P. J.P. J.P. J.P.

J.P. J.P.

This is where I just hear adorabilly. I just hear adorabilly.

The moon made our jokes sync up. I'm telling you. It happened. It's real.

Wait, Erin, was it the moon or was it?

Jupiter.

Goodbye. Bye forever. Oh, fuck that made me so happy.

Very funny. That was incredible.

Happy birthday, J.P.C.

Thank you.

Happy birthday, J.P.C. Happy birthday, J.P.C.

M-R-E parents in the music. Look-o created by M-O-E Cardamus. Get M-O-E the words. M-O-E-S-U-R-A Riddle Riddle.

Janet, that was phenomenal.

Thank you so much for coming on. I can't believe I made up a- I really probably did have a dream that I- That I did your podcast. I feel like I've told people on other podcasts that I've done your podcast.

Yeah, last week I was just on the show. Check out the episode. So you're just admitting you're a liar. It does 100% feel like you've been on more than once.

Wow. I mean, yeah, I just feel very close to you all right now. Casey, not you so much. You're very new to me and very straight and scary.

Sorry, Casey. Hey there, bops and flops. If you like that, you are going to love this week's Patreon. It is part six of our Name That Tune, the 2000 series. It's not really Name That Tune, it's something completely different. You can listen to that plus all of our back catalog at patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew for $8 a month and starting January 1st, ad-free episodes at the Review Crew level. See you there.

That was a hate gun podcast.