Which Riddle Riddle?

This is a HeadGum podcast.

Today, we're talking riddles. Three podcast hosts do a show solving riddles, puzzles, lateral thinking problems. They do improv along the way and have some fun. They're friends. One of them just moved. I'm Ira Glass. This is Hey Riddle Riddle. I'm Adal Rifai as well.

Did you know that Ira Glass stands for Irish Republican Army? What?

Did you know that glass stands for... Gee, Laddie Adal sucks.

People are going to think that this is this American life and then they're going to be so mad when it's not.

I've been practicing my irreglass impression on a scale of one to ten. What do we think?

Was that pretty good? I'd say like eight or nine. It got really good by the end, too.

Okay. It's been too long since I've heard irreglass's voice for me to comment. Does anybody else want to try it? No.

No, but I really love that you put yourself out there that way. I was really beautiful to watch.

I'm really proud of you. Thank you.

I would never, but it's for you.

What's the, uh, what's the woman who does cereal? I can do that.

Adal, I can do the music. Ready?

Harmony Corinne. Ready? That's my, that's my, that's my whole bit.

Bling, bling, bling, bling, bling. Yeah, we can all do that.

Is that Starly Kind? No. No, it's, oh god, what is her name? Anyway, I forget her name, but I can do a pretty, uh, spot on impression.

Let's hear it. Here we go.

Male Cube. Thank you. Thank you. I don't know her name. She's in the opening of the... For about 16 months. Sarah Conning.

Sarah Conning. For about 16 months, male chimp was like the butt of every joke where it's like, oh, I'm real chimp. And then eventually, did they go out of business? Are they still around?

Let humans have fun. I bet you had fun doing six or seven day of chimp bits.

I had so much fun. Can you do any podcast host impressions?

I'm Adal Rifai. I'm an absolute clown. Who knows? I got pervert energy.

Well, well, Erin, I do want to thank you for introducing the rest of us because Adal introduced himself and then we forgot to introduce ourselves.

I'm Erin and that's JPC's very kind good man.

And I have pervert energy, which doesn't make me a pervert. It just means that's the energy that I put out.

So wait, does this absolute clown bullshit still stand?

Did I say that? Okay, that's a really good example of absolute cloud bullshit.

I told you that vodka company paid me to be a clown.

Erin, okay. I do not want to mix vodka and clowns.

We have a lot to catch up with. There's been a lot going on in the Hey Riddle Riddle universe with our hosts. I'll start off because mine's maybe the shortest. Erin, since you left for LA, I told myself, Erin- Please. Yes. Thank you. I told myself, Adal, you should start writing more. Time is fleeting. You got to start writing more. So I've written something, and Erin, I want your opinion on it because I consider you a wonderful collaborator. JPC, I want your opinion as well. Oh, can't wait. But I assume yours is going to be negative. I've been trying to write more in general and so I wanted to start with the basics and I know that famously the saddest short story ever written is for sale baby shoes never worn. Now I was doing some writing exercises and I said, Adal, can you make this a two sentence story and make it the happiest story in the world? So I took a shot at that. So instead of the saddest one sentence story of all time, I have written the happiest two sentence story of all time. Erin, whenever you're ready, I'm going to start reading this. Okay. For sale, baby shoes never worn. The baby was born with wheels.

Okay, is the question, should you go outside and get some sun? Because the answer is yes. I think you could use some fresh air Adal, maybe a walker on your block.

Not the notes I wanted. Not the notes I wanted. And for my notes, when you said famously, I thought to myself, who is the most famous Lee? And then I was like, Bruce Lee, Tommy Lee Jones, David Lee Roth, Vivian, Lee Harvey Oswald. And then I started going, I was like, I don't know. I don't know who the famous is.

I'd say Robert E. Lee.

Robert E. Lee, yeah, yeah, okay.

I also have a tweet in my draft box if you want to give me some notes on this.

You ready?

Sperm count? What is that, some sort of gross Dracula?

Okay, yeah, I would go outside, take a walk. Also, I would say my baby being born with wheels is sort of a nightmare. My husband will know I fuck my car.

I'm sorry, Adal, but is that tweet just a direct sub-tweet of my, I want to suck, you're not, tweet because that's what Sperm Dracula would say, to be clear.

Sperm count does say, I want to suck, you're dick.

You guys are literally right where I left you.

So, Erin, sounds like you don't want to voice my character of Baby Car. What, Erin?

I never said that.

Speaking of baby car, you've been in a car traveling, traversing, across America to your final destination. What's his name? Ethan Supley? No, what's that guy's name? Ethan Hawke? No, what's his name? Devin Sawa. Who's the most famous Sawa? Erin, how was your trip? Where did you stop along the way? Are you settled?

Um, it was good. I'm happy. It took a long time to finally get out of Chicago, kept getting delayed. It was making me feel really anxious and sad, so I'm happy to be finally here. I feel way more peaceful, way more relaxed, and it's just so fun to finally be in my new place.

That's that Cali weed, baby.

Yeah, smoking it right now. We were going to take a longer trip, but it became kind of apparent that it was starting to be really hard on our sweet dog, Lou, who was like, what is happening? The whole time she was like, what the fuck is this? So we sort of cut it short, but ended up being great. So we stopped in middle of nowhere, Nebraska.

Ooh, J.R.R. talking.

We made some stops along the way, but didn't sleep any. We stopped in Iowa for a second, stopped in Nebraska somewhere else. And then our biggest days were Boulder, Colorado, which I loved. And then Moab. which I loved and then Zion which uh and that was like our big uh splurge was an Airbnb in Zion that was like a glamping experience wow that's cool I've heard so beautiful I've heard that's the prettiest of national parks JPC I know you've been to a lot of national parks would you say that that's the best

Yeah, and I went with my brother and him and his wife went out like maybe a month or two ago. And they said that the lines, there's a limit of how many people could come in the park because COVID particles were still up. They might not be at this point, but maybe they still are, I don't know. But he said the lines were like 250 people long for Hey Riddle.

What a night. Wow. Good commentary.

It's a valley. So you have to go into the valley to kind of get into the national park. But yeah, it's got to be packed because it's so fucking wonderful there.

That's where our friend Brett Lyons proposed to his now wife.

It's so cool. It's so beautiful. I can't recommend it enough. I'd really never, I'd never been to Colorado. I'd never been to Utah before. And it was such a gorgeous drive. We were supposed to do Grand Canyon and then Joshua Tree on the way. But then like, Lou started to like, she got sick when we were in Zion. We were like, we just got to go. So we drove from Zion to Vegas and we were like, just planning on getting takeout somewhere in Vegas because I'd never seen it before.

Sure. Here's what I'll say. Dogs love Vegas.

This is the problem we ran into and I came up with the absolute meanest solution. Can I tell you guys something that I'm not proud of? Sure. Okay. I didn't like leave Lou in a car or anything horrible like that. So Lou had been in the desert for a few days and had been sick. And so I was like, we should get her groomed right when we go to LA.

And I'm sorry, this is Diamond Phillips or your dog? Okay, so you grew Lou Diamond Phillips. Who was the most famous Diamond Phillips?

Oh, we didn't bring our dog. Yeah, Lou Diamond Phillips was just shitting in the desert because they were super sick.

I believe it. Just like you did in Young Guns.

Yeah, so I was like, had this stroke of genius. I was like, why? I've never been to Vegas before. I would love to see a casino. I want to go through the Bellagio. And so I found a PetSmart. That would groom Lou. So after the worst week of her life driving away from her home, we would call it a spa day. She thought I was abandoning her in the middle of nowhere, Nevada. And the eye contact she made with me when I was leaving her to get groomed was one of the most tragic moments of my life. She really thought I was leaving her there. Would you call it haunting? Oh yeah, for sure. I can't stop thinking about it. But she really did need to be groomed. She was very dusty. So she got groomed and I walked into the Bellagio. The air in there is amazing. I want to go back just for that. What day was this?

Because I was back in Vegas for 18 hours the other day.

It was right after you.

But I went back. So I was there for my birthday and then I was back, I was there for my birthday for two days and then I went back.

I would have been there Friday.

I was there, I was there Friday.

Why didn't we talk?

I don't know, but I was at the, I was at the Cosmopolitan the whole time.

You could have watched Tulu.

Yeah, I ate a wicked spoon buffet, which was very good.

Well I want to go back maybe for my 30th birthday party, so if you're interested.

Well 30th famously we're going to Hawaii.

Ah, ah, Hawaii and Vegas. Hawaii and Vegas. Yeah, they have a Hawaii and Vegas stuff.

They have a Paris there. Erin, will you, I'm going to, in July sometime, I can't remember when, I'm going to Colorado for the first time to go to Red Rocks to see Guster.

Oh, that's a blast.

So if you want to come.

I mean, yeah, I'm, I love Guster, you know I love Guster.

So did you bet, did you place any bets? Did you get them?

I did.

What'd you do? Would you win?

Well, it was awesome! And I felt something change. I could like hear my pupils getting bigger when I... So we were like, all right, we are only gonna like $50 each. We're gonna put $100 on the roulette. Like we're gonna play. And we got the little chips and we ended up like $250 extra up. We sat down with 100 and we left with like 300 and something. And I'm different now. And now I want to gamble all the time. It was thrilling and the air in there was good. And I was like, oh, I get it.

Did they bring you free drinks?

Yeah, I was like, yeah. Yeah, I might turn into a Vegas person, which means I will have no money. Yeah, Lou's still there. We walked her around PetSmart because dogs are allowed in there and we let her pick whatever toy she wanted because we felt so guilty.

Dogs are allowed in PetSmart? Yeah. Dogs are allowed in here. Look at the name on the store. Oh, PetSmart. My bad, my bad.

It was really fun and then I made it to LA and I love my place and I got a haircut today. I got eight inches off. It did become clear to me when I was walking around here. I was like, oh, I look like I'm from Chicago. I have a very different vibe.

As soon as I came on screen for our sound check, I was screaming with joy. Erin, your hair looks the best it's ever looked. That color's amazing. Thank you so much.

It's a super dark red and it's very short. And I love it, but I got here and I was like, I look like Snow White's much sicker cousin. And I need to start to look more awake and alive because everyone here looks so healthy.

You look like hipster Jean Grey, is what it looks like.

Well, you know, Erin, I get that you just arrived in L.A. and you know that it was summertime in Chicago when you left, right? You had an opportunity to go outside.

It was summer.

Gets a bite of the tea. Illinois?

Chicago, Illinois.

Yeah, for sure.

Oh, okay.

Also, before you left, I could have hooked you up with so much dog anxiety medicine.

I'm still in that with dog anxiety.

Oh yeah, it works. You just gotta take more of it. Are you like a 50-pound dog, 60-pound dog?

Yeah, I'm like a 50-pound dog. Um, Lou and let's do some like dog medicine talk really quick. Sure, sure. She has anxiety meds and she has meds for driving in the car but we've done a lot of road trips with her and we have found that makes her more anxious because she fights to sleep and it makes her back legs numb so it makes her scared to get in and out of the car. So we went with no meds and so in the car she was fine but every time we'd get to like a new hotel or location she was like What is happening? Are you guys about to leave me somewhere? This sucks. I'm scared.

Has she? Do you think she's adjusted to the fact that this is where you're going to be now? Is she comfortable in this space?

We couldn't believe it. I got pretty emotional. She seems like the happiest here than she's ever been anywhere. That's great. We lived in River North on the 10th floor before. And so we had a balcony that she was obsessed with going out on, but now we have tons of windows and we're on the second floor. So she's just been in like dog heaven, looking at squirrels, birds.

Well all dogs go to heaven. I do want to say it was said a moment ago, but I do have to take an opportunity just to plug, to push my own wares. Um, actually the first horror book I wrote since you've left Erin is called She Fights the Sleep.

Um, it doesn't come out.

It comes out October 1st, so please look for She Fights the Sleep.

Is it two sentences?

On shelves inside my house.

Yeah, of course. I think, yeah, maybe go for a walk, I'd say. I am happy that I got to see you guys one more time before I left. We got to see each other for a couple hours, like a week and a half ago, two weeks ago now.

Oh, we did a fancy little photo shoot. It was amazing. We got hair and makeup done.

I had the best time, and I don't look natural on camera, so JPC for a while had to just keep making me laugh, which is a lot of pressure, and he did it! It was incredible! You just say, JPC, make me laugh, and then it works!

They were like, say something to make them laugh, and then we'll take a picture. And so I did that, and they were like, no, no, no, no, no. Just start when we say go, just laugh. And I'm like, well, why didn't you just wait until I finished the thing, the joke?

Well, I couldn't believe it. You're great under pressure. I was very impressed.

What was also funny is at one point we did get a note to stop talking about people who had died because it was rubbing everyone out.

You can see it on our faces!

This is a happy photo shoot. Can you stop talking about funerals you've been doing? Please just continue talking.

We're so dysfunctional. We were talking about open caskets and they were like, can you... Maybe lighten it up.

We were granted a very cool opportunity with very professional people. I think it was, we found out it was like Chance the Rapper's photographer or something.

And then we... He was so professional.

And we were absolute morons, but they were very nice, and hopefully it turns out okay.

You guys are professional, but I saw a lot of fucking tattoos on that set, so I'm not really sure how professional it was.

I'm only bringing this up because I kind of want to apologize for it. My Uber came, and Adal, you were in the back bathroom, and I simply didn't wait because I thought I would get too sad saying goodbye to you. So I peaced out. I was like, buy GPC. And then I ran.

We were down in the lobby and I go, Erin, I can give you a ride home if you want. And you go, I just called an Uber. And then you go, unless you want me to cancel it. And I was like, well, whatever you want. And you're like, do you want me to cancel it?

And then I ran away from you.

I'm trying to save you money girl. Nobody wants to give anyone a ride. Let's just be clear about that. I've never wanted to give someone a ride.

I do it because I have to. Speaking of giving someone a ride, JPC also has some very big news, which is this past week, JPC, myself, and one Casey Tony went and saw the premiere of Fast and the Furious 9, F9, In 4DX, which if you've never seen a movie in 4DX, I can only describe it as watching a movie while sitting atop the most startled horse. They spray you in the face with rain, you're moving constantly. JPC, what is your review of F9?

I don't know. I couldn't tell you what happened in that movie, but here's what I will say. I will never not see another movie in 4DX. 4DX is my future. It is my past. It is my everything. It is all-consuming. It is the only way to experience a movie. It is the worst possible way to experience a movie, and therefore it is the greatest.

I want to watch like a documentary like in 4DX or just like a rom-com or something.

A live birth.

It is so the way it's like we have to constantly be doing something otherwise people get bored and it's like we won't get bored there's a movie playing but they start the movie and immediately these giant floodlights flash and our seats rock and immediately JBC as loud as he can just goes Nope. We can lose that one.

No, I said we could lose that one when they shined lights directly at our eyes. I was like, I don't know who that's for. That's for no one. The blinking flashing lights at our eyes is for no one. Here's what I'll say about 4DX. My review of 4DX is this. They have this interesting technology where they spray like scent at you. So it's like, you know, you're experiencing on this old factory level as well. But the scents didn't really correspond with what I was like experiencing in the theater. I thought that there would be more like, in my mind, when I was like, oh, 40X, there's gonna be like burning tires and like engine, like that kind of scent, but they didn't use it very well. It just kind of like was scent. It wasn't like specific to the movie. I think that's a missed opportunity. I would love to see 40X get a little better at that.

GBC, you know why you smell burning tires? Because that old factory burned down years ago. That's why they call it an old factory since.

You guys saw a movie without me?

Wait, Erin, you were gone. You were on the road. Also, you have a no Vin Diesel Claus. There's a show, I think it's a Disney word.

Hey, did somebody say Vin Diesel Claus? Oh, oh, oh. Who wouldn't?

Ho, ho, ho. Who wouldn't drive for fam? Family. Vin Diesel, we've discovered. JPC and I and Casey talked it over. Vin Diesel is a sentient Olive Garden. He really is.

He really is.

Wait, you guys made jokes about me? I hate this.

No, no, no. We made jokes about you.

No, I don't like it. I'm moving back.

There's a show in Disney World called Mickey's Philharmonic. Hey Riddle.

But just the shit that he does, you just have to remember, that's a 50-year-old man doing that. Like, that guy who's like falling out of a helicopter through helicopter blades, like landing on concrete, 50-year-old man. I'm 32 and it hurts to wake up.

Yeah! What are you going to be at 50? I've been thinking that. I have the pain of a 60-year-old. So I go like, what am I going to be? I'm going to be in a lot of pain at 50 or 60. Oh man.

Every time I see Vin Diesel doing a stunt, I just imagine Wilford Brimley doing it. Because I'm like, Wilford Brimley was 50 when he did cocoon and worked ancient. We, Erin, I know you've been traveling. I know you've been gone. We haven't seen you in a week or more.

I'm ready to do riddles.

Is that what you're about to say? Yeah, we're still a riddle podcast, unfortunately. So I do have some warm-up riddles. We'll maybe get into our main course riddles in the second half, unless we get through these pretty quickly. So here are some. These are called Odd Man Out. So I'm going to give you a few words or a few items in a list. And you have to tell me which one doesn't fit with the others and why it does not fit.

Is this an honor of Erin being the odd woman out now that she's out in LA?

Uh-huh, exactly. Wait, you guys saw a movie without me?

Okay, so the first ones are Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, Buchanan, and Carter. Which is the odd one out and why? Carter. Okay, Carter why? Pussy. Carter is seriously a pussy.

Would anybody like to have a peanut? Wham! Get Carter!

Let's fucking get him. Kill him, JPC.

One term ass motherfucker. Get bit.

Because he's from the 20th century.

I want to see a scene. I'll be playing a new president-elect, and this will be a fictitious president in the 1800s. Erin and JPC, you are just hardcore hecklers at the inaugural inauguration. Gotcha.

Thank you, citizens of the United States. I stand upon this podium.

Why aren't you wearing a coat?

Because it's... January! Okay, okay. And that's what I want. I want people to tell me their opinions and I will listen to each and every one of the citizens. Hey man, are you standing at that podium or kneeling?

You're super tall. Thank you. I don't like tall people.

I should have led with that. Well, let me take off my shoes and be like the Pope and be humble and connected to the earth with my bare feet.

There, I'm like... Put your shoes on! You're gonna get sick!

Okay, mixed messages. Let me put my shoe on. I'll put one shoe on, one shoe off. This is a fun parlor game. Now, the year is 1814 and of course we have many troubles in America. But I am here to tell you, I will trap all the... Not me! Huh? I'm good, dude!

Oh, you have no qualms, no issues, nothing you'd like me to fight for you for? I own four horses and a seal.

Uh, okay.

My biggest issue right now is you're not wearing a coat and you're only wearing one shoe. You're gonna get a coat, you're gonna get sick, and penicillin doesn't exist yet.

What's penicillin?

Exactly!

Well, we need advances in medicine because we all know that there are plagues sweeping across the world and we need to protect ourselves.

Now, I... Achoo!

Bless you.

And travel to you, so careful.

What's your position on Bofa?

Bofa. Let me check my notes here. Bofa. British organization for animals. Bofa is good! Now all animals must be protected, especially horses and seals. This guy knows what I'm talking about. We need to conserve animals and put them in zoos in fake habitats to where they feel like they're in nature, but we control what they eat and do at all times.

Bofa, these nuts! Excuse me? You were supposed to say, what's Bofa?

What's Bofa?

Both of these nuts. Well, my notes said that it's the British organization for animals. Yeah, that's also very important. I actually liked your answers on that, especially owning four horses and a seal. What's the seal's name?

I saw a photograph and I screamed for six days. Can you make sure nothing like that ever happens again?

Well, it's new technology, and of course we have cinemas where trains look like they're coming right at us.

No!

But they're not.

They've not hit my horses.

Or is Seal.

No, Seal doesn't come to the movie.

Oh.

And what's the Seal's name?

Bofa.

Bofa. Bofa what?

What's Bofa?

My Seal. Least not seen.

Yeah, he got a cold and that president was only president for 12 hours.

Yeah. Was that William Henry Harrison or someone? Benjamin. Benjamin Harrison. That's from pneumonia?

Yeah.

Because he talked too long in the cold. You old sack of shit.

He was only in the office for 34 days. Then he died in the cold and went off to his grave. He's the only president from Indiana. We're a bunch of hick moron losers. And that's the Indiana national anthem? That's our state song.

Is Mariah going to walk down the aisle to that?

Yeah. She'll actually run the other way down the aisle to that. Open the door and I'll be there, married.

Isn't the Indiana State bird a dead bird? Why a dead bird? So Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, Buchanan, and Carter. There's five names here, which is the odd one out, and why?

Did we have the right answer?

What was the guess again?

Carter.

Carter. And why?

No, but tell me if it's right and then I'll tell you what.

You are wrong.

Okay, then it's wrong.

Okay.

Buchanan.

Yeah, so you have Jefferson?

Yes. Madison. Madison. Oh, I'm sorry. These are the most popular babies.

Madison.

Madison. 2021. Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, Buchanan, and Carter.

Oh, Jefferson.

That is correct. Can you tell me why?

Everybody else has a J name and he's got a T first name.

That is correct. Jefferson is an odd man out. Jefferson's first name was Thomas. All the other presidents were named James.

I would like to see a scene.

Oh yeah, I guess they're all named James. Jimmy Carter is James Carter.

Yeah. I'd like to see a scene. You too, Adal, you are a dad who was president. This is like a George Bush senior, junior situation. You're trying to convince your son, JPC, to become president and follow in your footsteps.

Okay son, I know that you have your own ideas of what you want to do, but the reason I got you into Harvard and the reason I got you into the Skull and Bones Club Secret Society was so that you could one day fulfill your legacy, which is to ascend to the highest position in the United States.

I don't want to disappoint you, and frankly, I love jerking off into that coffin with those other guys. Pretty fun, huh? It was super fun. But that's what was, I was in it for that. Dad, I mean, that's my life. Like, when I was jerking off into that coffin surrounded by other, like, naked men or whatever the school of bone stuff does. You probably felt like a sperm count. What I felt like was a star. Oh. Dad, I have something to tell you. Yes? I have been doing porn. Oh, at this Golden Bones exclusively? No, I've been branching off. I've been making my own porn. It's actually super empowering. I really, really love it. Now, I would, I know that you keep the family's legacy and you're very high regard. So I have not been using my name. I've been using an assumed name.

Smart, smart. What is your, what is your stage name for porn?

Tony Jackhammer.

Okay.

Which I get it. I get it. That is, you're still last name, President Jack Hammer. I get it. But, Tony is not my name. My name's Anthony, so I don't think anyone would ever put two and two together.

Son, I'm mostly disappointed that Jack Hammer was right there, and you decided to shoehorn in one extra name.

Oh man, Jack Hammer.

Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. Hot mics. Your mics are hot. You're a hot mic. Oh! Huge fan of your work, by the way. Huge fan of your work.

Oh, which one of us? The president or the porn star?

Tony. I wasn't a huge fan of your policies. You're kind of a bummer. Mission accomplished! No, no, no.

But you are a fan of my policies, right? Yeah.

Everybody comes. I get it. I get it. Very cool. I love it. Very good.

My banner said mission accomplished, and I know you were in a film called Missionary Accomplished.

Hey, so your mic is still hot.

Oh, is it going to burn me? No. I'm old. I don't know.

I love that Well, we're members of Skull and Bones, but he calls us Skull and Bones Club. So there's three things. There's the Skull and Bones Society, there's the Skull and Bones Club, and then there's the Skull and Crossbones Club.

I'm sure there's more than three things.

At Princeton has the cross skulls and bones.

All I know is my uncle, and this is true, my uncle, when he was at Yale, said no. Is that a Yale? I think it might be a Yale Secret Society. The Skull and Bones one? My uncle went there and he said no to them and then they like harassed him. He was captain of the football team there and then they were really mean to him when he said no.

And your uncle was Paul Walker? Erin's in a well. Speaking of wells, well we should probably go to commercial and hear about all the dog medication that you should be buying and we'll be right back with more riddles.

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That's right, Erin! Thank you! Wait a second, Stampy. You said that all we needed was a computer, a standard printer, and you. But I just went on stamp.com. I signed up Hey Riddle Riddle. We always have to send in a lot of mail for Hey Riddle Riddle. I used my printer. I don't need you.

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Bye, Stampy! Bye! Goodbye, Stampy!

I'm disappearing. You're ceasing to believe! Stamps.com, never go to the post office again!

And we're back. We're here with JPC, Erin, Lou the Dog, Spaghetti the Dog, and Adal Rifai. This is part two. It's This American Life, Hey Riddle Riddle.

You know what? I got it now. It sounds like a mouse doing an impression of Ira Glass. And for the mouse, it's like 10 out of 10. The mouse has it. But for Adal?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You see what I'm saying? I love my supportive friends.

Let's do a few more... Hey, I didn't even acknowledge that you spoke. Oh, thank you.

You're right. That's the best supporter... You're welcome. That's the best supporter a friend can give. Let's do a few more Oddman out and then we'll get into some full course riddles. Love it. The next one we have is Hey, H-A-Y. Hey. Okay. Jackpot, Star, and Brakes. Hey, Jackpot, Star, and Brakes. Who do we think is the odd man out? And Erin, you're just in Vegas, so jackpot should be a very familiar term to you right now. Because that's when they say when you hit a number in roulette, they say jackpot. So these are all famous Ringos.

Ringo jackpot, Ringo hey. Hey Ringo. No, hey jackpot star and brakes. And famously, hey Jude is for horses. This is tough. Most of these are things that you'd find inside a box of Lucky Charms. Oh, my lucky hay, my lucky breaks.

Is it a word that you add to them?

Erin, you are correct. Well, it's a...ish. There's a word that goes along with all of them, and it's like an action. It's an action that's one word that happens to all of them, except for one. And you, one of them is... shooting... shooting jackpot. One of them is jackpot, right? Hey... jackpot... star and brakes. So these are all things you... blank. And it's one word except for hit. Hit the hay. Hit the jackpot. You don't hit the star and you hit the brakes.

Well you do. The first thing I did when I moved to Los Angeles is I got a bat and I went to Bruce Willis' star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and I beat the shit out of it.

So he just hangs out at his Hollywood star.

Yeah, and I went, hey Bruce, look at this! And then I went, my star's gonna replace that Bruce Willis. I'm gonna remake the kid in whatever the fuck else you were in. Die hard or whatever.

I want to see a scene, but JPC had something he wanted to say.

Oh no, I was just going to say if you had to destroy one star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and it can't be freaking Donald Trump that's been done, I think they removed it because it kept being defaced. Anyway, you have to destroy one star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Which star are you fucking taking out?

Adam West because he had his time.

Move over, Adam West. It's some other Batman's turn. Give Robert Pattinson a start.

Give Kanye West a chance. Erin, what do you think?

I mean, anyone who's kind of a shitty person, I would remove it.

Yeah, but you only get one and there's so many of them in Hollywood.

I know. I really do think it would be funny to do it to Bruce Willis's start.

So I want to see a scene. Okay, nobody cares. Oh, JPC, who would you want to? Hey, JPC.

No, wait. No, you'll never know.

I was waiting. I was waiting.

JPC, I was waiting.

It was Casey Affleck.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, hell yeah. It was Casey.

Get out of here, Casey.

You're lame. So I want to see a scene. The two of you are at a bar. I'll let you decide who's who. But one of you is a star celebrity, and the other one is hitting on this star or celebrity.

Got it.

Hey, I'm actually just here with my friends, so I was wondering if you wanted to.

I'm so sorry I don't want to sign any autographs I'm out to dinner and I'm not a celebrity so no one asked me but you are okay we're gonna do one more of these odd man outs I actually think that that would be a really strong power move if you saw a huge celebrity like Brad Pitt out and you would just just walk up to him and be like

Hey, I'm so sorry. I'm not doing autographs tonight, so... You're so nice. I love you.

I just... It's just not... I love my fans, but I'm just not interested.

I'm here with my friends. I'm just trying to have a good chill night. Thank you.

I think it's funny to try and act like they're someone who's like two levels of stardom below them. So you see Brad Pitt and you're like, oh, skeet all rich. Scream! You're great.

And you see how they react.

That would be amazing.

Thanks for watching! Aren't you that fuckable guy from Thelma and Louise? There's a movie where he has, like, only one line in it. It's that Christian Slater movie that Quentin Tarantino wrote. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.

That is called... It's got Gary Oldman in it. It's called Rosemary's Baby.

It's called True Romance. True Romance, True Romance. I would love to walk up to Brad Pitt and be like, oh my God, you're in True Romance. Yeah, I had one fucking line in that movie when I was 24.

Okay, so here's the last Oddman out. Now, the list consists of... Oklahoma with an exclamation point. South Pacific. The Sound of Music and West Side Story. Erin, this is a softball over the plate.

Erin, this has got to be like a Rodgers and Hammerstein thing. Ding, ding. But three of them are written by the same people, right? You're correct. But I couldn't tell you any more information than that.

I know the type of riddle this is.

Can you name the four again?

Yep, the four are Oklahoma exclamation point, South Pacific, period. The sound of music, question mark. West Side Story. West Side Story, no.

West Side Story.

Yes! West Side Story is the odd man out. It was created by Leonard Burstein. Stephen Sondheim. Arthur Lawrence and Stephen Sondheim. All the rest are musicals by Rogers and Jack Hammerstein.

Those are pretty good. I was just talking about South Pacific the other day. I'm gonna tell you a quick little story. Please. So I was in that musical the summer between my 5th and 6th grade or no 6th and 7th grade in this summer kids theater program called Kids Cabaret. in Massachusetts. And you have to be between 8 and 16 to be in the show. And one of my best friends, Connor, was 11 or 12 at the time, 12, and he got the lead, which was unheard of. Wow, a 12-year-old? He got the male lead in South Pacific, which is a 50-year-old man who sings basically opera. He does the... So he's a 12-year-old boy singing that. With a 16-year-old girl playing the romantic lead, he had to have his first kiss on stage. It was one of the hardest I've ever... I saw him right before I left and I was like, that was one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life. Is a 12-year-old boy being like, I'm very old. He's supposed to be like 15 years older than her in the show and he's a child. Playing opposite a teenage girl. And it's a three hour long musical. And I gotta tell you guys, so in it, I played a sailor. A male sailor. There was a while I was playing like, I was in the male ensemble for many of my summers there. I was a pirate in pirate spin sands. I was the male sailor and I got to be in the song, There's Nothing Like a Dame. Classic musical theater song. A bunch of sailors talking about how horny they are. I, a 12 year old girl, had the horniest line as my solo. It was my first solo on stage in a musical, in a full musical, in my lyric that I sang as a 12 year old girl.

Can I guess?

Yes, go ahead.

It's so horny. And I'd like to suck a booby.

You're close. I don't want to guess. Was that from Aladdin? Aladdin, yeah. I think yours would be, so this is, you said this was kind of gross or kind of dirty?

Yeah, just like a 1940s sailor.

So I'm gonna pick it back off JPC and I'm gonna say, I need six boobs. That's too expensive.

Pretty good, yes. My line was, we've got every kind of feeling but the feeling of relief. And I said that in front of my town.

That sounds like an Excedrin commercial.

And then after I said it got knocked to the ground for comedic defect, and it was my fucking nightmare. Because I was like, I got to commit hard because I am an actress, but also I am trying to get kissed. I want people to have a crush on me. I'm dressed like a male sailor and everyone else looks cute and I'm saying we've got every kind of feeling but the feeling of relief. I was 12!

I was 12! Erin, and famously I don't know if this is news to our listeners but famously you've never been kissed and you actually went back to that high school, your high school, and you pretend to be a teenager and you made out with the baseball coach?

That was a movie starring Drew Barrymore and John C. Riley.

I will also say Indiana and Indiana, especially when I went to school, we did not have a summer musical camp for kids, but what we did have was a really, really, really good bully relocation program. So you would just put your name into a big hat in between the ages of 12 and 16. They would find a local bully for you, and then that bully would just make your life hell for the foreseeable future. So we kind of skipped ahead. We were a little bit more advanced, and it sounds like the Massachusetts. So we went directly to the source.

I love that. That makes sense. And I want to see a scene. The two of you are in a, we'll say, like grade school production of a show. OK. You're both very young, but the content of the show is very much adult themed, and you're two young actors struggling to make it through this show that you have no business doing.

OK.

I guess I just feel like when you're the phantom of the opera that you're a lot like it just doesn't feel motivated by anything when you sing to me and I'm not trying to give you a note or anything but like you get it right?

I think it would be helpful could we just we just won the scene from the top okay okay okay I got a letter in the mail today, Diane. The doctor said you had an abortion.

You opened my mail?

Oh shit, I was just walking by, but these kids are doing Phantom of the Opera.

You opened my mail?

It was out on the count of Diane. Okay, it's not like I went through it looking to find this fucking information.

I made a choice for a family.

We don't have a family thanks to you.

This is a joke.

Now, I'm gonna go to the opera, I'm gonna get good at twerk, and I'm gonna start a fire. Don't follow me.

I wonder if they're gonna sing any of the songs.

Wishing you were somehow here again. I'm thinking I will somehow heal. I don't know the words. I don't think they can tell that I don't know the words.

Here I am, at the opera. It is late, and I'm drunk. My wife Diane, she between me, and so I will end it all.

I don't think our teacher knows what Phantom of the Opera is.

Let's get into some full riddles. Here we go. Kevin was sitting alone at a table in his favorite diner. All of a sudden he yelled, Frankfurter! He was served a hamburger. Kevin was pleased.

Oh man, this is sad. He's alone in his favorite diner, which means he probably eats here alone a lot.

Can you read it again?

Yep, Kevin was sitting alone at a table in his favorite diner. All of a sudden he yelled, Frankfurter! He was served a hamburger. Kevin was pleased.

You shouldn't be yelling at a waitstaff in a diner. I mean, I don't care if it is your favorite, if you're a local. Like, you can say please, you can wait for them to ask you if you'd like something. You don't need to be yelling at them. They're making like, what, like $2 a fucking hour plus tips. And Kevin, by the way, doesn't sound like the type of guy who tips.

Yeah, you can also just say, can I get the check? You don't have to skyride it with a pan in the air. Just say I want the check.

You don't need to do that little thing with your finger where you dip down and then flick back up. We get what a check is, but just ask me like a human being. You don't need to point to your necklace.

Wow, you guys, a bunch of waiters just came running to your house. You summoned them.

Oh, fuck. You just brought me a bunch of checks. I can't pay this. I'm ruined.

Frankfurter is the name of the waiter. Frankfurter is the name of his friend. He just walked in.

I don't know what the heir and Ellie is doing to you, but you nailed it.

Making me sweat.

Frankfurter was the waiter's last name. Kevin ordered a hamburger and that was what he was served. He always called Tom Frankfurter the waiter by his last name when he ate at that diner.

Can you imagine? I got something to say. Who the fuck knows a waiter's last name?

Maybe the waiter itself? The waiter's family? The waiter itself?

Does the waiter know the waiter's last name?

Sounds like a Samuel Beckett play. I feel like the waiter had like Tom on his name tag and Kevin was probably like, hey Tom, fucking Tom Frankfurter come over here. Like he probably assigned it and the waiter was too polite to correct him.

I will say I was a pre-pandemic. No, this is kind of sad.

I was a regular.

Thank you so much. I was a regular at a restaurant for six years. I would go every Sunday. And I'd miss some, but for six years, I knew everybody's name who worked at that restaurant. This was Big Chicks? I didn't know it. Walt, this was Tweet.

I knew it was Tweet. You told me that. I used to live right by Tweet. I love Tweet.

Love it. Fucking fantastic place. Still open. I just stopped eating indoors, obviously. But I didn't know a single person's last name. I knew everyone's name. I didn't know a single person's last name.

Where everybody knows your first name, sometimes you want to go. That's the song, right? What do you do?

From what? I mean, do you just ask people for their last name? Like, if you're at a restaurant the waiter's like, hey, I'm Devin. You're like, Devin, what's your last name?

You'd be like, get away from me.

I'm not giving you that information.

I'd like to see a scene. Adal, you are at a small town diner, and you think you are an absolute delightful, charming regular who has a great rapport with the staff. And JBC, you're just trying to get through your shift, and you think that this is kind of bullshit.

Sure. Wow. So great to be back at Tootie Poots. Saddle up to my favorite stool here at the counter. Ding ding. Service please. Hey. Hey, so good to see you again. Oh my gosh. It is you. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin.

Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin. Gremlin.

Well, one, unless you count the marshmallows and chocolate I'm going to put on your head, you cracker. What? Gram, like Gram with the cracker.

We're running on a little bit of a wait, but yeah, I guess if you want to sit at the bar, you want to sit at the bar?

Shit, I guess I sat on this guy's lap. Sorry, I'm just, this is just my stool. No, it's fine by me. So a sperm count.

Why don't you grab this stool over here? We're free here.

Okay. Graham and Ma'am, I'll take the yuge. I'll take the yuge with a side of the more yuge.

Okay, yeah. I'm like a month and a half in, so I don't know what the yuge is. Do you want a menu or can you just tell me what you'd like?

The usual. I want pancakes stuffed inside of waffles. Uh, okay, I mean... You call them pawfuls, remember? Or someone calls them pawfuls. What's the name of this place? Is this Tootie Poots?

Is this Tootie Poots? This is Tootie Poots. Uh, normally when someone wants the usual out of place, it's not like an off-menu order. That's confusing for the waitstaff.

I guess I'm driving through this town and I've never been here before. Um... Yeah. Oh, I know what's going on. I once ate a Tootsie Pop.

Okay, I'm glad you know what's going on. I can check with the chef to see if we can do a pancake stuff.

Hey buddy. Hey, I was here yesterday and I forgot my sunglasses, but it's so good to see you again.

Oh, okay. Do you want me to look for your sunglasses?

Honestly, I came back in because I thought you and I had the best time talking. I was here for like three hours. I thought maybe... Yeah, yeah. Oh, give me your last name.

Nope. I do remember you. We do have your sunglasses. We just put them in the lost and found them. I can get those for you.

Can I also get a bunch of mashed up waffles to go?

Excuse me everyone in the restaurant. Excuse me everyone in the restaurant. This is Graham. I have an announcement to make.

This is one of the vampires.

Hey everybody. Look, I know that I am an above average looking person in a town that is a very, it's a very pass-through town, right? You're a Bismarck 9. Thank you, ma'am. I get that I'm gathering a lot of attention from people in the restaurant, but I just want to make a general announcement that I'm at work, okay? We are not friends. We're just in a work relationship, and it's never gonna be more, because I have my collies, and that's enough for me. I'm not really looking for anything romantic right now. Did he say his colleagues or his collies? My collies. I have my two collies. I still couldn't catch it.

He loves us! We did it everybody!

This got away from you, Graham.

Sometimes you wanna go to Tootie Poots, Tootie Poots, Tootie Poots.

You dumb cracker motherfucker.

Oh, delightful.

Well, let's do another riddle here. If my last name was cracker, I would name my child Graham. How do you not? There's only one first name for that.

I think Graham is a really great name too.

I'm really losing. I knew a guy in high school whose last name was Graham and I can't think of like Graham is one of those names that is a last name to me.

Okay well then I can't change your mind and I'm not going to. That's an uphill battle I cannot win.

Here's another riddle. Kevin the college student was relieved when he received a letter telling him that his college loan was forgiven by the bank. Two months later, Kevin was in big trouble for not paying the money owed. What's going on? Marvin Gaye, what's going on?

They emotionally forgave him.

They should do that. Hey, this is Visa. Just calling to let you know that we emotionally forgive you for your balance.

You still owe it, but... But we actually decided to let it go over here. It was kind of weighing on us. We were super stressed out about your debt. But you know what? We are just trying to, like, go with some of the stuff we can't control.

Because your negativity is not Visa's negativity. Just so we just need you to understand that.

Hi, this is Tom with Visa. Are you mad at us? Did we do something? Because you're not paying your balance. Are you upset?

Hey, just checking in. I'm trying to not be such a people pleaser, but gosh, it really... It's starting to feel personal!

Hey, this is Jeff from Visa Calling. Okay, so it's a minimum payment, but you can pay more than that. I don't know if you're doing this to hurt me or to get at me and get back at me.

Yeah, me again, sorry. Have I called too much? I feel like I've called too much. Let me know if I called too much. Okay, call me back. Bye.

Hey, this is Tom of Visa. I swung by and rang the doorbell. Nobody answered, but I felt like I heard someone. I heard a creak at the door, so if you're there, open the door. Okay, bye-bye.

Hey, me again. Your credit score is always changing so you can keep checking it if you want to. It's like it's a free resource for you and you're not getting it.

Me again. I decided to get drunk and go out with my friends. I actually don't even need whatever this is. So have fun, pay off like medical debt or fucking whatever. I don't even care.

Hey, it's Tom again. We've got to notice that you're trying to consolidate your debt that you also have with Chase. I don't know if, I don't know who Chase is, I don't want to know, but just let me know if this is real, because if so it hurts and call me back. Hey me again, who the fuck is MasterCard? Seen. Let me read it one more time. Kevin, the college student, was relieved when he received a letter telling him that his college loan was forgiven by the bank. Two months later, Kevin was in big trouble for not paying the money owed.

Is this different money owed? Did the letter say like, your debt is forgiven by the bank because we, this other company, have bought your debt from the bank? Which is something that happens. And then they send them a letter being like, you still owe us the money motherfucker. It just changed things.

He transferred schools. He didn't pay the interest. He didn't pay... I'm running away.

I'm running away.

I'm sorry all you have is that Kindle there can't be more than 10 books on there you'll get bored yeah I put my Kindle on a stick I threw it over my shoulder and I'm gonna hop from train to train from train concert to train concert exactly okay

So what do we think? Those are all great guesses. They're not correct. Okay. So Kevin went to college, we assume Temple, always. Always. Was relieved when he received a letter telling him his college loan was forgiven by the bank. Two months later, Kevin was in big trouble for not paying the money owed. So this is the same college, the same debt, so good guesses, but everything he said was not the correct answer in this instance.

So is it that he got his loan forgiven and then took out another loan to go like do more college and that loan was what he didn't pay back?

No but JBC you've just given me a really good idea which is if you have college debt Go to the nearest church, go to confessional, hold up your college debt, and the priest has to forgive them, right? Your college debt may have to do some... Yeah, if you're Catholic, yeah. Some rosemary's, sometimes some sage.

Now we are all born with original debt, so if you weren't baptized, you still have the debt that Jesus died for on the cross.

That's what I did. My debt did three Hail Mary's, and nothing happened, and I'm in crushing medical and school loan debt.

I think that, and I don't want to be too crass here because it's been a while since Catholic school, so if I'm getting this wrong, please correct me gently, correct me if I'm overstepping for Catholicism, but I believe that Jesus's dying words on the cross was, I'm forgiving $40,000 a student debt if you make over $250,000 a year. And have a Pell Grant from the federal government and plan to open a business in the minority community in the next three months.

Wow, I want to see a scene. You two are Adam and Eve, you're in the Garden of Eden, and you're going over your monthly bills.

Okay. Okay. And so that is heating because it's pretty much just the air, so that's free. So we've got that covered.

Okay. It seems like there's a lot of money on apples this last month.

Oh my God. Yeah. I'm looking at the grocery bill. It's like all apples. Who's eating all these apples?

I don't know. What?

Wait, you're not eating these apples?

No, I'm not eating these apples.

I'm not eating these apples.

Fuck. Is it our tenant? It's snake. Hey Snake. Snake, can you get in here? Snake, can you come out of your room?

Yes, what's going on?

We're going over our bills, and it seems like we've been over our budget on apples. Also, we don't wear clothes. We nakey, so I don't know who is spending this much money at Nordstrom Rack on our card.

What is a banana hammock? There's so many of these on the list. What is that?

Well, sometimes my whole body is a penis, so I need to sleep comfortably, so I buy the hammock for my body. And also, I'm not spending money on apples. I'm spending money on 8 gigabytes of Apple storage.

Oh my god, that's why these are so fucking expensive.

Yeah. Snake, we love that you're staying with us. It's really fun and not weird at all.

Until you get back on your one piece. Hey honey, don't. I'm sorry, but yeah. Excuse me? It's been four months, Eve. Okay.

Excuse me?

Um, Snake, we've been meaning to talk to you about this. We think that maybe it's time for you to move out. We need to start populating the earth, so we'd like some privacy. Also, we nakey, so it's embarrassing.

Ooh, about that. Why don't you take a bite of an apple?

Hey Snake, why don't you go back to lizard and just apologize, okay?

She threw me out.

Well, did she throw you out because you were buying a bunch of Apple computers and not apologizing? And maybe if you would try to fix the situation, maybe that would work.

Well, it's not that I bought the computers, it's that I hid them in my she shed.

Okay, we tried to be a friend, but now that you're with us, we were like trying, we like are starting to understand why she kicked you out in the first place. You're pretty inconsiderate.

You're cold-blooded. You don't care about other people.

Oh, this is a lot to swallow and I'm a snake, so that's a lot.

Well, unhinge your jaw and listen to what we have to say because we don't think you're a bad person, Snake. We just think you're on a bad path and we think it's time that you mess up and learn.

Can I just say I'm feeling so much shame right now? So much shame.

So much shame that I want you two to put these on here. Put these on. I bought these for you. These are from J. Crew.

I'm with Stupid.

Yes, now that's linen. That was $84. Um... You... $84 for a banana hammock? Yes, and the arrow points upwards to God.

So God is stupid. I'm with stupid, right? Because he created you. Now Eve, I don't mean to burst your bubble, but you technically are the first barbecue, right? What? Does that make sense? Well, I don't know if God told you.

You're from his... Oh, you believe the rib joke? God got drunk once and he, I was like, God, please, like, please tell me how you like made me. And he was like, you're from his rib. And we all laughed so hard because that would be insane.

Oh, is that where the term ribbing someone comes from? Exactly!

It was like a ribbed for her pleasure thing.

I hope nobody takes that out of context later and decides that women are less.

I have a whole line of clothing that just says women is barbecue.

Okay. Snake, get out.

Get out, Snake.

We're already out the horse. And by the way, you're heating the whole neighborhood. That's why you're heating so expensive. Mother of God! Scene. Let's solve this Riddle and then we'll be done. Snake, am I heating all of the outdoors? So Kevin, a college student, was relieved when he received a letter telling him his college loan was forgiven by the bank. Two months later, Kevin was in big trouble for not paying the money owed. So what's going on is Kevin is basically a dum-dum. He received something in the mail. He misunderstood it. And that's what's going on. So what do we think the misunderstanding was?

So this is just a, this is just, he received a letter in the mail that says loans were forgiven, but that wasn't actually the case. That's what we're dealing with now. There's a lie in the riddle.

Well it wasn't a lie, it was just a misunderstanding. And my hint for you is- Have you read it wrong? He maybe didn't read it wrong, but he intuited it wrong. What's he interpreting? Well, the exact wording is the answer. Oh, but his loans had been forgiven? I was just asking for you to repeat. It's a play on words. Yes. He received a letter telling him that his college loan was forgiven by the bank. So that's not exactly what it said, but it said something where he interpreted it to mean that. My hint for you in terms of that phrase is Europe.

Europe. The band Europe. The band Europe is the hint. Yep. So was this just something that he read in the heat of the moment? I thought I'd get a little more for a Europe reference. No, that's Asia shit. What's another continent? Yeah, it's bound to happen.

Have you guys listened to South America? What did it say?

The letter sent from the bank had said, this is your last notice. Kevin thought he no longer had to pay because no notices would be coming. So it turns out, Kevin dumb.

Got it. Okay, I understand. That riddle sucks, but I do give it. Well, speaking of getting it, JPC, do you have anything that you would like to plug? JPC's got it, and if you want to get it, you can go over to twitch.tv slash sharkbark. I'm going to watch me play video games I'm streaming most every day of the week. Also, go and listen to the Billbuds pop cast. You can find that anywhere pop casts are found. Just Google the words Billbuds, and we review pop music. Erin, anything that you would like to plug?

Yes, I would like to plug my Instagram, Erin Keif10, and here's the deal. So in the last week I started going back and responding to some of the Instagram messages that I've been getting. And I do this thing where I write a draft of each one of my notes because I have anxiety and that's what you have to do. And my Instagram deleted like over 50 messages that I've received and I had written the responses to them. So if you have sent me a message in the last like two or three months and I didn't respond to you, please resend it. I probably have a response already typed out. I would like to get it to you. So please resend your message if I haven't responded. Thank you.

And if you are still online, For the 2020 elections, stay in line. Your vote will still count. Adal, anything to plug?

Yes, I want to plug one of our good friends and maybe the tallest comedian I know, Ross Kimball, has a new podcast called Good at Parties. I was recently on an episode talking about Sleep No More One of my favorite things, one of my favorite theatrical experiences. So please listen to my episode of Good at Parties. You can find it wherever you find podcasts where Ross and I talk about sleep no more and it's a delight. Also you can join me if you want to be closer to Adal, if you want to be some like share something in common and become closer friends. You can join me in being a patron of Billbuds and you get a ton of good bonus content.

Well, I wouldn't say a ton. You get maybe one episode every two weeks, but it's only a dollar. Wait, what?

Hold on. What? I've been listening to the same episodes over and over. Erin, now that you are in LA and you're talking about destroying stars with bats, you also were talking about maybe blowing up a planet. Now, Planet Hollywood is bankrupt, so you can't blow up them. Is there another planet you'd ever want to hit up or blow up?

I've been looking into it and I think it's gotta be a Jupiter.

Bye forever. I'm sorry, let me take that again. Okay. Bye. Forever.

This is Ira Glass.

Are you an alien? Saying bye forever. Ira Glass.

This is a little mouse pretending to be Ira Glass. Saying bye forever.

This is a little alien pretending to be a little mouse. Pretending to be Ira Glass.

Alright hold on guys, I have to take Ira Glass to my leader.

Starting Erin Keif and John Patrick Coan. Casey Toney could be editing.

Hey there taxes and breaks. If you like that, you are going to love this week's Patreon. It's our latest entry to our Better Know Estate series with Delaware. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle by joining the Clue Crew for $5 a month or the Review Crew for $8 a month. See you then.