This is a HeadGum podcast.
00:00:02
Adal
This is a HeadGum podcast.
JPC
Hey from the Riddle Riddle.
Adal
A weekly podcast from the magical land of puzzles and riddles. My name is Adal Rifai and here's a little bit about what's going on. About 10 months ago I fell into a portal behind the riddle and ended up in the magical land. Keep going. Huh? Keep going. It's good. Am I gonna get in trouble? I can't imagine so. Just make it different enough. Make it different enough.
JPC
My co-hosts JPC, a local fuckwad. A talking fuckwad. A talking fuckwad. JPC. Yes, yes, yes. Do a catchphrase. What comes up with that? And a magical old woman. Sleepy Witch. Sleepy Witch. I am Erin Keif. Sleepy old witch of the tongue tongue. I live in the... A bunch of names. Do a bunch of names. The improv people call me sleepy and overrated. The JPC people talk... tell me I don't talk into the microphone good enough. The Adal people call me awesome. He did a thumbs down and I ignored him. And we're here at this table to do puzzles and riddles. That's pretty fun, right? That's great. Yeah. Yeah. Now we will... Erin? I got a CNN update on my phone. Let's see what it is. Hold on. What was the CNN update? We'll see what it is. What was the CNN update? Oh, it's about the plane crash. So if you're listening on a plate, be careful. Oh my god. That went from worst to awful. I'm so sorry. If you're listening on a plate, be careful. Which also implies that you can stop playing. That's like Smokey the Bear times 10.
00:02:13
Adal
I panicked. Only you can prevent plane crashes by being very careful on a plane.
JPC
Where were you on that one?
???
Smokey, I can't.
???
Are you trying? I really am. No, plane crash and I panicked.
???
Um, plane crash is bad. Puzzles, even worse.
???
We have a very special episode today. What? Is it because of the intro? It's because of the intro. So I do this other podcast, I thought I could boost some of its numbers. Sibling Peculiar. It's called Siblings Peculiar, and it's me and my sissy. No, we have a special episode today because I'm going to present for you all some steaks.
???
I feel like a lot of times we complain about... I'm a vegetarian. I can't eat that. Okay, well, it's gonna be chicken then. You can eat chicken, right?
Adal
Mike Rambaugh gets that wrong all the time. You're a vegetarian. That means you can eat chicken? And it's like, no. No. So I feel like a lot of times we don't take the puzzle seriously. We're not trying to solve them as hard as we could.
JPC
That's mostly KJ though, right?
Adal
That's mostly KJ because they just like lay down and then they, you know, they put cucumber on their eye. Double middle finger. But I want to add some mistakes to the riddle. So what I've created here is a game show. This could be the first time, and last time this could be the first of many. But this is a game show where I Adal Rifai
00:03:34
Erin
We'll be giving out my own money to the winner betwixt the two of you. What? Are we talking about money-wise? Now hold on, I've, Erin, just so you know, I've received some of these Adal bucks and they're only good at the Adal store? And I will tell you... But there is a genius bar. The Adal store has some items that you want, but they're all very expensive. If you walk in, it's just Adal with a fake mustache and an apron.
Adal
Welcome! And it's only an apron. Can I get you an I-plan? An I-plan!
Erin
Okay, okay. What are we talking money with?
JPC
Yes. Okay, we're talking a handy dolly. What? !
Erin
That is money that will literally change my life. JBC has more money than me.
JPC
I want everyone to hope I win. Well, yes, I do have more money than you, but also I have a very sick son and I've told him what your hundred dollars comes in I'll get you the medicine.
Erin
Your son is long dead.
JPC
He was six years old. He's a very sick son and he died. He's a very sick son Joey Adblossom. Oh my god, so whoever wins, JPC or I, get 100 American Adal Bucks.
00:04:44
Adal
Let me say this. There's 100 American Adal Bucks up for grabs. Okay. You may not win all 100, but there's a $100 up for grabs. Let me do my intro for the game show. Okay. Ideally, somebody makes this into a great game show song, but we may never hear that. Here we go. This is called Money, Money, Money, Puzzies, Puzzies, Puzzies, It Pays to be Right, Adal Rifai's Honey Dolly Giveaway, based on the book Adaltude, My Life and Riddies and Puzzies, Uncle Adal writes a check. Money, Money, Money, Puzzies, Puzzies, Puzzies, It Pays to be Right, Adal Rifai's Honey Dolly Giveaway, Adal Rifai's Honey Dolly Giveaway, Based on the book Adaltude, My Life and Riddies and Puzzies, Uncle Adal writes a check. Okay, now are you accepting notes on the dialogue?
JPC
Yeah, do you have any feedback?
Adal
I love it. I don't want to do any funny businesses in this episode. I don't want to be funny. I don't want scenes. I don't want anything. I might call for scenes to help save me some money, but we'll see. You might fall for scenes to help save you some money. So you're just going to pull our strings like the little puppet master. So here's what we'll say. So I have these questions. Whoever gets them right is going to keep the card and at the end of the game whoever has the most cards will win a $100.
00:06:03
JPC
Now there can be some penalty points where you might lose some of the money and also I will say you can also earn money during the improv scenes because finally Finally, you can win it at improv. So at improv, when we do a scene, if I call a scene for the two of you, I will declare a winner and they might get extra points or extra money based on how well they do in the scene. So you can win at improv. I want to stress that for anybody who's out there studying improv, you can and should win at improv.
Erin
Your scene partner is someone to be beat.
Adal
I have a question.
Erin
Do we win if we do proper yes and or do we win if we play like you and we do a lot of puns?
JPC
Ooh, Erin just lost $10. No!
Erin
Wow, that's a really silly question, Erin. I can't believe you lost the $10.
JPC
Oh my gosh. Great roll. But do you know any, like, how do I win the improv scenes? It's gonna be, it's gonna differ case by case.
Adal
So if a certain line you say amuses me, you might win the scene. If you do good character work, you might win the scene.
Erin
It's all, I can't say, there's no hard and fast rule. What about your funny voice? How many points are done to me?
00:07:04
Adal
Holy shit, JBC, you are walking away with this game. Sounds like it's going to be pretty subjective. DJ's covering their eyes. This is fun and Adal, I love this spin. And just to be clear, every episode that I've hosted, you've all had the potential to win $100 and you haven't. What? I know I didn't explain the rules to you on the show, but the potential has been there the entire time. Let's get this show on the road.
???
Okay?
???
If you say the phrase, I listen to my co-hosts, I'm going to ask you a question about one of your co-hosts.
JPC
If you get it right, you get to answer that card without the other person being able to chime in.
Erin
Wow! If you get it wrong, they get the card and the money attached to it. Got it.
Adal
So you're only allowed to do that twice? You each have two of those. Okay.
???
Oh my gosh.
Erin
This is so fun.
00:08:04
JPC
I'm going to use them both. I'm going to use mine. I'm just interested. And where did this trivia come from? Real life or show?
Erin
What's up? The trivia about our co-hosts.
Adal
Real life or the show? Do you think we're playing characters? What is happening here? Wait, but like stuff we know about each other in real life or stuff that we learn that the listeners also know about us? Could be either. We'll see. You each also have one of these, so you each have two I listen to my co-hosts. Repeat that back to me. We each have two I listen to my co-hosts. Repeat that back to me. See? GPC is listening. The other thing you have is called full anal penetration. If you say full anal penetration, you immediately screw the other person. They have to answer two cards in a row and if they don't get it right, they lose money. Gotcha.
Erin
That's Jeff Goldblum. That's a Jeff Goldblum story. Holy crap. That sounds exhausting. Can't wait. There's a lot of rules.
Adal
I love it.
JPC
Before we get into the questions, the first thing I'll say is whoever can repeat back to me the title of this game show, as close as possible, will win $5.
00:09:09
Erin
Erin, you go first.
???
Two people more clearly than you understand me at JPC. That is so funny.
Adal
Welcome to Puzzle Town. You thought that was the whole title?
JPC
I don't know. He was a long title. Give a shit, try. Puzzles, Riddles, Money and Puzzles. Okay, JPC. Waka, waka, waka. My name's Adal. Waka, waka, waka. End scene.
Adal
Saying my name and repeating a phrase several times was both a part of it. So JPC, you win $5. Yeah. What was it? It was money, money, money, puzzies, puzzies, puzzies. It pays to be right. Adal Rifai's Hyundai Dolly giveaway based on the book, Adaltude, My Life in Riddies and Puzzies, Uncle Adal writes a check. And are you willing to accept some notes on that?
00:10:21
Erin
I'll give you an example of the type of question just so you get a feel for it before we get into the actual stakes of it. So I'm going to say at the top of the question I'm going to say what the word or answer is going to be.
Adal
In this case like for example I might say occupation so you know that the answer is a occupation. Sometimes I may not give it but if it's there I'll give it.
Erin
So occupation and then there's four clues for each word or phrase and they get increasingly easier.
Adal
So if you think you know it, you're going to say, you're going to Puzz in by saying Puzz. Great. Ring your Puzzer. I hate me. Do you want two more days? I've sat up all night thinking of this. You're gonna say, you're gonna say Puzz. Whoever says Puzz first, I will then go to them for the answer just so we're not shouting out answers. Gotcha. After each hint, you each get one attempt to answer. You can't just keep yelling over and over and over. Got it. Cool? So for example, we say Occupation. The first hint is Paul Bunyan. You would say... Puzz. And you would answer... Lumberjack. That is incorrect.
Erin
JPC, you want to give it a try? Puzz. Yep.
Adal
Forrester. Nope.
JPC
Second clue.
Adal
This is getting a little bit easier. A callous attitude. Paul Bunyan, a callous attitude. Puzz. Occupation. Yes. Rancher. Nope. I don't know. Okay. Third one, getting easier. Corny clues. Paul Bunyan, a callous attitude.
00:11:34
Erin
Corny clues.
???
Occupation.
???
Puzz? Yep.
???
Farmer? Nope. Okay.
Erin
I don't know. Okay. Last one. If you get this, it's a feet. Paul Bunyan, a callous attitude, corny clues. If you get this, it's a feet. Occupation. Puzz. Yes. Farmer? No. Shoe store operator? Very close. Okay.
Adal
Occupation. Yep.
JPC
Puz? Podiatrist. Okay. Cool. Oh, okay. Okay. Does that make sense?
Adal
Yeah. Yeah. So the clues are leading you funneling towards the right answer. Paul Bunyan could be obviously be lumberjack, got a onion, corn, calluses. It's leading you towards something. Yeah. Makes sense? Yes. Yes. Now it makes perfect sense. And I'm glad we did an example. Yeah. Because that was confusing. You're so smart and kind.
???
GPC gets an extra dollar, he is up to $6. Great.
???
If you play the game, you gotta play the win. Here we go. First one.
???
Famous literary work. Okay. Much murder and mayhem.
00:12:35
JPC
I have a question.
Adal
This better not be a Fokker thing or you lose all your money. Stop him dead in his tracks. Much murder and mayhem. I have a question. Yes. I have Puzzy's Fucker, can you Puzz me? I'll lose the money because I had to do it. I do have a question. If I say Puzz and give an answer, can I say that's my whole answer for that round? I can't say Puzz again or I can't say Puzz again until the next round. Every clue you can give a new answer. Okay. But I'm gonna keep things cooking so I'm not gonna wait for an answer each round. Got it. Cool. Much murder and mayhem. And this is what I'm sorry this is a famous literary work. Did you know that there's a section called I listen to my co-hosts? Did you just use it? No, I don't have any. I should have given myself some. Always a best seller. Much murder and mayhem. Always a best seller. Getting this one should be as easy. Getting this one should be an easy job. Getting this one should be an easy job. And job that's open to interpretation how I said that. The old and the new. Famous literary work, much murder and mayhem, always a best seller. Getting this one should be as easy as Job, an easy Job. Puzz. Yep. The Bible. The Bible, that is correct. Job. JPC is back up to five dollies. Erin, how are we feeling? Great. You're prying blood. Oh, that's completely unrelated to this. I want to see a quick scene. Remember that there is a way to win improv in this episode.
00:14:11
JPC
I'm making your partner look great. JBC, you wrote a book called The Bible. This is the original Bible. It's not a remake.
Adal
Yeah, it's not a remake. You wrote the original Bible, whatever year that was. And so this is a fiction scene. And Erin, you're the publisher and JBC, you're trying to sell her on the Bible. Okay. I don't have a lot of time, so this pitch meeting's gotta go quick. Okay. So, um, well, I, you know, I've been self-publishing actually now for a few years, but I think I'm ready for the, uh, mainstream.
JPC
So, uh, we open on Bethlehem.
Adal
Uh, there's an old man and he's working at a hotel and the hotel is all full. I feel like I, I'm sorry, I hate to give notes right out of the gate, but like, what if we start with like a story about a dude and then like a woman who comes from his hip?
???
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
JPC
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
???
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Adal
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
???
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Adal
Uh-huh. Uh-huh
00:15:17
JPC
Oh yeah. Just, you know, and he's just cut, chiseled. He's got the gutter. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Okay.
Adal
And then he pulls a bone. How many abs are we talking? Eight. He's got abs in the back. He's got kidney abs. He pulls a bone from his side, plants it on the ground and pisses on it. JPC won that scene. Yeah! Is it because I said a guy pulls a boat out and pisses on it? Probably. I make JPC look good, but laughing, laughing. Let me give you $2 for that scene. You're up to $7.
???
Yes!
Adal
Okay. Alright, here we go. Next one. Fictional character. This is a fictional character. Fictional character. After mom died, he was adopted by another. Birth name, John Clayton. Oh boy. Fictional character after mom died. He was adopted by another birth- Puz. Yep. Harry Potter. Incorrect. You never know. I didn't read all the books and that could have been his name. Okay. Grew up to be a swinger. After mom died, he was adopted by another, birth name John Clayton, grew up to be a swinger, fictional character. No idea. Fictional character, uh, Puzz. Yep. This is Vince Vaughn's character from the movie Swingers. That is correct.
00:16:24
Erin
Is it really? No.
Adal
What's the point, Cliff? Fourth and last clue, Dad, Lord Greystroke, was killed by an ape. Lord Greystroke was killed by an ape. Grew up to be a swinger. Puzz. Yes. Is this Charlton Heston? Nope. But you're circling the bullseye. Is this like a Planet of the Earth thing? No.
Erin
Erin, this is also a Disney movie.
JPC
Boy oh boy. We're up to be a Swinger. Ape. Swinger. Puss. Mom died, yes. Mowgli. Getting closer. Jungle Book. Getting warmer. Okay. Oh, they got the boy from Jungle Book. It's the boy from Jungle Book.
Erin
Tarzan. Is that not Mowgli?
JPC
Tarzan.
Erin
So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna take $5 out of the pot. Okay. So $95 is up for grabs.
JPC
Told you in Urbana. Nobody got that so we remove $5.
Erin
I think I'm nervous. I think that's what's happening. Okay, I want to see a scene.
JPC
Erin, this is you talking in the mirror just trying to psych yourself up. This scene is only Erin, but we'll see which Erin wins. Yeah, I'll see if I can try to win somebody. During the scene? It will see. Erin, look in the mirror. Confidence. Boost your confidence. Okay, look at you. Look at you. Okay, you're still on Hey Riddle Riddle. You haven't blown that yet. All right, you got this. You're not at Coase on Magic Tavern. You've never been on campaign podcast.
00:17:47
Erin
But that doesn't mean you're not enough, okay?
JPC
JPC and Adal, I mean, they're tall, but they're not that tall. They're not tall enough for you to be that afraid of them, okay? They're really nice. I think they would have your back in a bar fight. You got this. I love you.
Adal
Okay, you got it.
Erin
You look great. Fix your hair.
Adal
Excuse me, ma'am, the footlocker's closing. Yes! He got it! He got it, he won. No. Erin? I love that.
???
Am I on the board?
Adal
It was real sad. Very sad. Very funny. And also, I want to let you know, I would have your back in a bar fight.
JPC
Thank you. I'd be knocked down immediately, but I'd have your back.
Adal
I think I would probably call the cops as soon as the bar fight started, and then I would act as a character witness in a way that was very favorable to you. Oh, thank you! Would you take a punch for me, though?
???
Oh, no.
Adal
No, no, no. Would you take a punch from me?
JPC
Yeah, if you brought me a punch, I would- Would you serve punch? Yeah. I would drink it, yeah. And then I'd punch you in the face.
Adal
Do you guys know Hank Green, the author? Yeah. Yeah. So Hank Green told... Damn it Bobby! Damn it Bobby! Hank Hill. He lives in Montana and he was telling me that the way, he said he learned this in Montana, but the way to avoid a bar fight or win a bar fight is to put your hands up and scream, I don't want to fight you and then to punch the person.
00:19:05
Erin
That's how to win a bar fight? I think it was to punch them and then raise your hands and yell, I don't want to fight you.
Adal
Because then all the witnesses see you raise your hands and you're not doing anything. And you've yelled, I don't want to fight you. So when the cops come, they know they think that the other person's in here. That's some shit. Which they are. I mean, I think... Yeah. If I'm in a bar fight, I raise my hands and I say, my dad's a cop.
Erin
And then that's, you just exit the bar fight.
Adal
Erin, for that scene, which I thought was legit fantastic, I'm going to give you $10. Wow! Because it was you talking to yourself, and you both won. So you get $10. Didn't we both lose? For the Foot Locker reference, I will give you $1, so you're up to $8.
Erin
And Erin, I'd also like to say you're very tall.
Adal
I know. And Adal and I aren't especially tall. I had an interesting conversation today. Do you mind if we do a really quick sidebar? No. I was talking to... That's going to cost you a quarter per second. Then I don't want to do it. Then I don't want to do it.
Erin
Oh wow. You're already at the muddy earth. This will be, you know, in game shows when they get to know the contestants, this will be that moment. I had a conversation today where we asked each other, do you look how you feel on the inside? Do you feel like you match your looks on the inside? And it was just really interesting. The person I talked to was like, yeah, except I think I would imagine myself having crazier hair. Have you ever dyed your hair a crazy color? Not crazy crazy, but I feel like I picture myself as like a kind of shorter blonde woman.
00:20:29
JPC
Yeah, and you said if we hit 2,000 patrons on our Patreon that you said that you would diet a forest green?
???
Yeah, I'll diet whatever you want.
Adal
And I said if we hit 2,000 patrons, I would go in a forest greens diet where I could have eaten pine cones from the forest. Do you two look how you feel in the inside?
JPC
I feel like I don't because I'm always very happy and content and like genial, but I feel like my face is my eyebrows furrow.
Erin
So I think people think I'm always like sad or tired or pissed off.
JPC
Yeah.
Adal
So I feel like my face betrays my actual inner feeling, which is like everything's good. I'm happy to see you. Yeah. I feel like I should be more handsome than I am. That's not what I said. Do you feel like Waluigi and Captain Hook on the inside? The fact that everything is crooked on me is bad. How about that dick? Oh, straight as an arrow. And also barbed with feathers. It's like an arrow. Arrows are good.
JPC
I'm like Legolas down there.
Adal
What? What could that mean? Uh, this is a rock star.
00:21:40
JPC
Repeat that back. Okay, this is a rock star. Great. Keyboard player for the... How well do I know one of my co-hosts?
Adal
Great. So I'm gonna ask you a question about one of your co-hosts. Got it. If you get it right, you have full control of this card. I figured I had to go for it. Again, I also forget what the other one was. Name one of Erin's sisters. Molly. Erin, is that correct?
JPC
Yeah, this is sort of like a win-lose type situation where it feels like he listens to me.
Erin
Okay, hold on. You have another sister too though, right?
Adal
The one that's married to Mitch. Her name is... fuck.
Erin
Another Irish name.
Adal
Molly and... It's not Megan, is it? No. It's funny because I have another friend from Boston who's got a sister named Megan.
Erin
It's funny. What's her name? Kathleen. Kathleen! I think that when I hear Mitch, I just go fucking red with rage. Yeah, of course you do. I'm sorry, Kathleen. I'm sure you're wonderful. So JPC, you get all four of these.
Adal
You don't have to buzz in each time. You can wait till you know it. Here we go.
00:22:42
Erin
Rockstar, keyboard player for the bluesology band backing up Long John Baldry. Reggie Dwight is his real name from Middlesex, England.
Adal
Reggie Dwight owns probably the world's most outrageous eyeglasses collection.
JPC
Betty and the Jets finally said goodbye, Yellow Book Road. Elton John. The answer is Mick Jagger. Oh man.
Adal
Answer is Elton John. You get $5. Oh it is!
Erin
You are up to $13. I have a question.
Adal
I have to pee so bad but I'm afraid I'm going to lose points. If you go pee, what I'm going to say is that if you're back here in 20 seconds... That's way too short. You have to wash your hands. If you're back here in a minute without washing your hands, and then you shake JPC's hands, I will give you 10 bucks. I don't let this deal.
JPC
Let's make a deal. Will I lose points though if I go?
Erin
You go and then we're going to get to know our other contestant, JPC.
JPC
JPC, how are we doing? Where are you from? Thank you. I'm from Greensboro Baptist Church. Okay, you were born in a pew. I was born in a pew, and the priest said something stinks. P.U. Yeah, no, I am from space. Okay, what planet?
00:23:56
Adal
Well, it's actually I'm from Space Ghost Coast to Coast, the studio there. Are you the praying mantis? I'm Zorak. I'm from Indianapolis, Indiana. I'm the middle child of two brothers. That's what I've got. Yeah. Very nice. Yes, very nice. Borat. Anything you want to say about Erin while she's gone? You know, I'm excited to play with such an exciting player. I think that she's truly a treat, a delight, a challenge, a bit of a mystery.
Erin
And, you know, I'm excited to see if I can take some money from her. And how are you doing financially?
JPC
I'm doing very well.
Erin
Very well off.
JPC
You're about to get a new place, right? Yeah, about to get a new place. Conda, rent, own?
Erin
Rent, rent, rent, rent. So you're not doing that well.
JPC
Well, it's actually financially this market. Buying prices and housing market.
Erin
You heard it straight from Budget Spice. Rent don't own.
JPC
Erin, what did I say I would give you? Ten dollars. Okay, that sounds right. So you're up to $20. Okay, very nice.
00:24:57
Adal
I felt like that was under a minute. Yeah, under a minute. Okay, so there is $33 on the board. Here we go. Next one. This word is a grab bag, so it could be anything. Anything. What hearts do on a heavy date? Wait, what hearts do on a heavy date? Got it. This is what hearts do on a heavy date. A kind of cake. A place going to... Puzz. Puzz. Pound. The answer is pound. I gotta know. What was that fourth clue? Fourth clue. Most Americans have ten too many.
Erin
That's friends. That's shaming.
Adal
And this game was written in England. Here we go. This is another grab bag. A type of pastry. A type of pastry. Pause. Yep. Cake. Nope. Hey, you take every shot, you don't miss Gretzky, baby.
Erin
What personal managers hate to see?
Adal
What a restless sleeper does.
00:25:58
JPC
An unexpected change of possession in football.
???
A type of pastry.
Adal
What personnel managers hate to see. What restless sleepers do. An unexpected change of possession in football.
JPC
It's Fumble Cake. Here's what I'll say. You both answered the same answer, so you both lose $2. No. Tumble? Is it a crumble? Crumble, tumble. Oh boy, it is not a tumble or a crumble. It is a turnover.
Adal
Okay, so I was thinking it was a fumble.
JPC
Does that make sense? Well, a fumble leads to a turnover. Or a can lead to it. Not always, but it can. I want to see a scene where you're both in paint and all kinds of costume and jerseys and hats. You're at a Patriots game. You don't know what the fuck is going on. What is going on?
00:27:08
Adal
Hey Josh, you're facing the wrong way. That might be a stat.
Erin
You're turning, you're looking at the crowd.
Adal
Well this is even more confusing. It's kind of cold. It's very cold. Is this hockey? I... it could be. Is this ice hockey? I don't know. I just... I heard that we were going to an event. Naturally, I assumed it was cats. I dressed up like Mr. Mistoffelees. This is all body paint and feathers. You never looked better. Thank you so much. And this is... I'm very con... I'm concerned that I'm confused. Um, I, it looks to me like this is just all about head injuries. Yes. Like giving each other head injuries, like trying to function with a head injury. Oh, there's a man. Uh, excuse me, sir. Are you selling, are you selling soup? I'm not in the scene. God bless you. God bless you. The man sneezed. Oh my gosh. Oh, so he sneezed all over the soup. Alright, you know what? I think you should run down there. Okay. Yeah, just go down there. Yeah, just ask them what they're doing. Excuse me.
JPC
Hi, I'm from the audience up here. The audience?
00:28:11
Adal
You mean the crowd? Well sure. And I came down here to the field and I want to understand what everything is happening and this man here. Oh, everyone's so tall here. Everyone's so tall here. Yeah, everyone's a professional football player. That doesn't mean you should be afraid of I feel like Erin Keif on a Hey Riddle Riddle episode. Everyone's so tall. Okay, so what's the plan here, fellas? Well, my name is Bill Belichick. Can you show me your feet real quick? Yeah, here you are. Here's my icon. I call it my pause. Yeah, that sweat should. Did you buy it like this or was this a dryer accident? I'm gonna say you both won that. So, JPC you get $2 for that scene, Erin you also get $2 mostly for making it authentic.
JPC
You know what?
Adal
And that is the most money I've ever been doing in profit. JPC you're at $13, Erin you're at $25. Almost double with JPC. Lucky number 11. And what we're going to do is right now mentioning Lucky number 11. Of course that movie is back in theaters. So we're going to hear a quick ad right now from our sponsors. We'll be right back with more. Adal's give away based on the best-selling book, Adal's a big guy! We'll be right back.
00:29:43
JPC
Money, money, money. Puzzies, puzzies, puzzies. It pays to be right. Adal Rifai is hunting all the giveaways. Jase is playing Adal Rifai.
Erin
Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai.
JPC
Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai.
Erin
Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai. Jase is playing Adal Rifai.
JPC
Okay, Adal, since we're back from break, can we give a quick recap of what the board looks like? Right now, JPC has $13, Erin Keif has $25, and there's currently $95 up for grabbies.
Erin
Wait, $95 up for grabs.
JPC
What did I just say? Adal, I believe you are going to tell us a little story about one of your uncles.
00:30:44
Erin
Yes, my uncle Yasser is a cool dude.
JPC
Okay, and can you name one of his defining traits? Bones a restaurant.
Adal
Good answer, good answer. Let's see, owns a restaurant up on the board. It's both right and wrong. The restaurant one is correct. Just to recap, JPC has used one of his I Know My co-hosts. He has one remaining. Erin, you have two of those. I'm excited. And you both have remaining a full anal penetration. Here we go, next one. This is an apparel. The word is apparel. Ah, so a story from the Bible. That's incorrect. Invented in France, where else, in 1946. Named after the island site of an early U.S. atomic test.
Erin
Caused a scandal among those of more modest taste. Float on, modest mouse. Plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug, plug,
00:32:03
JPC
That is incorrect. Do you think there's an island called Miniskirt Island? No, but there's like the name for it. You don't want to be upwind of Miniskirt Island. JBC gets a dollar for that? No. Huzzbikini? Wait! Oh boy, Erin, I'm so sorry. You already gave an answer after the last clue. Oh, sorry. JBC? Yes, Puzzbotkini. It is Puzzbot Keeney.
Adal
Let me go grab Puzzbot. It is Bikini. I'm going to give you... JPC, I'm going to give you $4 for that. Nice. That brings you up to a healthy 17. Erin, I'm going to give you $1 for that. Thank you. Because you did it, but you played incorrectly. Watch yourself. Watch yourself, Counselor. Watch yourself, Jesus.
JPC
I'd be back in a fight, but this is Game Show and I'm hosting. Watch yourself. Got it. This is an... I want to see a quick scene. This is going to be... So, Erin, I don't know if you know this. I'm not trying to mansplain to you, but... But you're doing a great job. You're doing a great job. But one of the first atomic test sites was on the Bikini Atoll, which is like the Bikini Islands. Okay, what's the scene? So the scene I want to see is, JPC, you are a naval officer and you have washed ashore after your shipwreck onto the small island of Miniskirt.
00:33:24
Adal
Ah, so thirsty. Ah, so thirsty. I have to say. Oh, we got tequila. I'm sorry? We have tequila. Oh, I've, oh, I've never, I wasn't expecting to see it. I'm a goddess. Can you believe how hot I look?
JPC
Look at my legs. Look at my legs. Okay, yeah. My legs for days. If you have a rash on them though. What's your name pal? Hey handsome. My name is Lieutenant Colonel Fred Balzac. Okay Fred Balzac. Looks like we're the only two on this island for now.
Adal
Oh, for now? Mm-hmm.
JPC
What does that mean? I don't know if things go okay. You'd like to have it?
Adal
Like, have a child? I guess you said it, not me. Okay, yeah, I don't know what I'm saying. Uh, you said you had tequila? Yeah, that's all. And I learned how to make tequila. Don't have food, haven't found food yet. You haven't found food? You're stuck here? I feel like there's some trees over there that might have some food. I'm so sorry. There's definitely a lot of fish here. You said that you were a goddess?
JPC
Mm-hmm. Okay, and that's, you're just a goddess stuck on this island?
Adal
Yeah, I just wanted you to think, like, you washed up ashore, you end up with a goddess. I'm actually, my name's Eileen. And I got dropped out of a helicopter onto this island. Okay, if I'm being honest, I'm not a Lieutenant Colonel.
00:34:34
Erin
I'm actually a naval officer.
Adal
And A-bomb starts to drop on me. I'm the sergeant with my belly button. Uh, tummy's time. Uh, what is that?
JPC
Take a look up.
Erin
Whoa, that's Yvonne. Hey. Ooh, I think I'm gonna give myself $5. Yeah. Erin, I'm gonna give you $5 for that scene. You won that scene. Nice. I'm gonna have, I can do this where I can give you $3.
JPC
Okay, I'll take it. If you give me Fred Balzac's middle name and I like it.
Adal
Okay, $3 for Fred Balzac's middle name, Ivanka. I like it. I'll Venmo you $3 Adal. You're staying at $17. That's fine. That's fine. Erin, you're $31. I'll buy you a copy. Here we go.
Erin
Moving on. I have unka balsa. I have unka balsa. Fib. This is an object. Little changed from those used in China 2,000 years ago. Some are used for fighting, some for fishing. Puzz. Yes. Annette. Are you saying your favorite mouseketeer?
00:35:44
Adal
That is incorrect.
???
Puzz a spear. That is incorrect.
Adal
They're all high strung. Puzz. Yep. Fishing pole. No. Fuck. I don't know. Last clue. Ben Franklin used one during a storm. Puzz. Yep. Come on. A kite. It is a kite, Erin. You got five dollars.
Erin
Have you? Yes. I lived it, my man. Yes. Where it's like two people fly a kite and they try and cut the other kite loose. So it's like they use a wire that's fairly sharp. Oh, got it. Or durable, and they try and cut the other kite. Yeah. It's not, I mean, it's not a common thing. It's not ideal. It's not ideal. Here we go. Let's see a quick scene. This will be the fastest scene.
JPC
Okay. It's two kites fighting. Got it. I know you are, but what am I? A kite?
00:36:46
Adal
James, you got $5. I set him up! I set him up!
JPC
If we've learned anything from this podcast, you don't win by setting up. I don't know. I feel like I... See if he's up to $22. Erin, you have $36. Here we go. This is a famous literary work. A fairy tale written in 1697. I want to do a full anal stop.
Erin
I want to goldbloom Erin on this one. So this is two questions in a row. And Erin, if you don't get them, you lose the money. Okay, all of my money. No, I wager.
Adal
I would like to put up... How much money do I have? You have $22. I would like to put up $15 of my own dollars. I thought you were my friend. I'm your friend. I have your... I'm talking about JPC.
JPC
So what do you want to do with this $15? I don't know. So here's what we'll say. If you get this right, you win JPC's $15. You get nothing from the bank, but you win JPC's $15. If you lose, JPC gets $15 from you. Okay. If she loses, Erin, you can either give me $15 or you have to eat as much egg salad as I want or as I can fit on a spoon. I would love to eat as much egg salad as you want. That's hysterical. As I can fit on a spoon.
00:38:09
Adal
Then you have to watch someone eat egg salad quickly and that's on you.
???
So Erin, you do have to get this right.
JPC
I'm sorry, I'm a little bit confused. Do I have to get it right based on the first two clues?
Erin
No. Do you want to do that? No, no, no. I just was confused about how that was worded.
Adal
Should we do all four or should we say top three? No. Top three. She doesn't get the last one too easy. I just was clarifying and then you made it harder for me.
???
Top three is pretty good. Here we go. This is a famous literary work. Fairy tale written in 1697.
???
In the Grimm Brothers version, Granny survives. Oh. Never trust the wolf. Puz.
JPC
Little Red Riding Hood. Little Red Riding Hood. Shoot.
Adal
That was written that long ago? Yeah. You calling me a liar?
JPC
No, I've just, I've never known that.
Adal
By a German wolf.
JPC
It was a wolf in writer's clothing.
Adal
Let the grandpa live. Oh, I got it. Can I call a scene? And this one, it can live in a bubble and not be judged. This is highly unorthodox. Oh, we actually, you know what? We already did a little red riding scene on the show.
Erin
Who lives in a bubble and will not be judged? Erin, scene work. No, we already did a little. Do you remember the on the Brooke Bright episode? Yeah, never mind.
00:39:13
JPC
Yeah, we did.
Erin
Here we go.
JPC
You have to get both to get all $15. This is a place. You're gonna get three clues. A place shrouded in mystery. There are three sides to every story. Limbo of the lost. Shrouded in mystery, there are three sides to every story. Limbo of the lost. Puzz. Yes. Purgatory? Wait. Wait. Wait. Purgatory. Purgatory was my guess. Purgatory was my guess.
Adal
I fed that to Erin. Because I'm feeling a little unhinged. But I will let Erin guess one more time.
JPC
Erin, you get one more. That's very generous. You get one more guess. I can't stress enough. There are three sides to every story. Three sides to every story. Three sides to every story. Also, this answer has three words to it. Oh, and I'm wrong. I don't know. Blank, blank, blank. Oh! Shrouded in mystery, there are three sides to every story.
Adal
Limbo of the lost. I don't know. Okay. Do you want to get the steal? No, but just for fun. It's the Babinga Kangle. JPC wins $15 from Erin, bringing Erin down to $21. What was the last hint for the Bermuda trial? JPC rockets to $37. What was the last hint? Area of the Atlantic off the southeast USA. See that makes it sound like purgatory. Purgatory works for all of those. I want to see a scene. Honestly, seriously, can we at least give me like maybe a dollar for the fact that purgatory works for all three of those answers? It's mysterious.
00:40:47
Erin
Three sides to every story, heaven, hell, and then purgatory.
Adal
That's true. That one it works for. I'm sorry, this is...
Erin
I just want, I don't want money credit, I just want friendship credit.
Adal
That is not an unreasonable answer.
JPC
My favorite part in Jeopardy!
Adal
is when the contestant is like, look, be fair, be fair. The way I said it wasn't right, but it was smart. The DaVinci code fits every stipulation, Alex. I'm ready. I want to see a quick scene. Erin, you're going to be Amelia Earhart, and you just got lost. You're playing Floon to Purgatory. Oh boy, the sky looks a little different. Oh. Hello? Hello, I'm Amelia Earhart. I fly in an airplane. Who are you? Oh, my name's Dave. I was a computer programmer who was addicted to internet pornography. Dave? Quick sidebar, you get two extra dollars if you give me a funny middle and last name. Yeah, my name is Dave. I funk a ballsack. Don't give me the point. Anyway, you're dead. Have I been? Well, what year is it, boy? And why is one of your arms stronger than the other arm? 46 years old, I'm not a boy. Well, there is no year here. We're just waiting because what we did was neither good nor bad, and so now we have to wait to get into heaven. Well, how did I die?
00:42:10
???
What's the last thing you remember?
JPC
I was in an airplane, but I'd never die in an airplane. I'm Amelia fucking Earhart.
Erin
Well, most people die in airplanes.
JPC
Is that true?
Erin
For sure.
JPC
Oh, I'm remembering how we started this episode now and the guilt is rushing back.
Erin
Yeah, so you're dead now and this is kind of a place where you can kind of wait. So let me get this straight. Amelia Earhart is in the same place as a man whose middle name is Ivanka.
JPC
Last name is Balzac. My parents were big Trump fans.
Erin
I'm gonna say you split the difference.
JPC
So, JPC you get 250, you're up to 3950.
Erin
Nice. Erin, you're up to 2350.
JPC
I'm gonna try to get to 69 and then quit. Oh my god. There you go. This is gonna be a grab bag.
Erin
A North American bird, the crested Grosbeak. Grosbeak? Mm-hmm. A North American bird, the crested Grosbeak.
JPC
If I know a little thing about my co-host, then I want to prove it. And just a reminder, Erin, you have two I know my co-hosts and one falling ill penetration.
00:43:12
Erin
Go on. JPC, you have one I know my co-hosts. I know my co-hosts. Also a new twist, if KJ at any point can mime the answer, KJ gets $5.
JPC
Oh my god. KJ, don't do this. Oh, KJ. A North American bird, the Crested Grosbeak. I apologize, I don't know the correct pronunciation. Hey, JPC did it! I know my co-host.
Erin
Oh, I'm sorry.
JPC
So I know my co-host, JPC.
Adal
You can have full control of this card if you answer this correctly. Yes. Within 10 days, not counting the year, what is my birthday? Okay. Within 10 days, not counting June 6th. You are correct. It's June 1st? Yes! You were within five days? I knew the... I would have gotten that right on the money.
JPC
We just did that birthday episode of Patreon. I'm so bad with birthdays, but I remember Adal saying that his birthday he was still in school for.
Erin
No, you were still in school for, Erin, and we were enjoying our summer.
JPC
You were reading off your phone. Yes. So you have full control of this card. Here we go.
Adal
A North American bird. We mentioned that. Namesake of a sports team. A rich red color, a Catholic Church official. I want to say it's the redskins, but I shouldn't say that right? KJ is killing it. You know in church how they have the Redskins? It is the Cardinals. There's a priest, there's a pope, there's the Redskins. Where you make KJ, were you doing a Cardinal?
00:44:33
Erin
Yeah.
Adal
I couldn't tell. I could tell. But hold on, hold on. I'd answer the thing to have full control of the card. KJ can't steal if I have full control of the card. Okay, we'll allow it. The rules, KJ, decorum. So you're up to $44.50. We're almost hitting the ceiling of what's available, which is $95.
???
Here we go.
Adal
Famous person.
Erin
Yeah.
Adal
That's correct. You lose $4 because that is too soon. Here we go. Famous person. Hair doctor. As in the German hair doctor. As in a German wolf might say. So a hair doctor is not like a stylist. How a wolf. Sex was often on his mind. Pause. Sigmund Freud. It is Sigmund Freud. Freudian slop. I wasn't paying attention, KJ. Did you know it? He did Hitler and he did cocaine. What was it? What did you do? Cocaine. They did cocaine. I'm gonna give KJ $5.
Erin
Wait, does Sigmund Freud do a bunch of cocaine?
00:45:34
Adal
Probably. We don't know. I want to see a scene. Erin, you're Sigmund Freud. And JPC, you are Sigmund Freud's coke dealer.
Erin
Gotcha. Ziggy, Ziggy.
Adal
Buddy, I can't sell you anymore. Well, I need to have sex with my mom. I'm sorry. Cocaine. I'm sorry. Can I have some cocaine?
JPC
Alright, fine. If you don't have cocaine, what can I have? Okay.
Erin
Well, I can give you some sex with my dad.
JPC
I mean, marijuana.
Adal
Marijuana. Alright, fine. Actually, I don't love smoking. Do you have any sex with my brother?
Erin
I mean heroin.
Adal
Oh, yes!
JPC
I can give you heroin. Have you ever done heroin before? No, I've only had sex with my brother. See?
Adal
I like that you slipped that in there.
Erin
So here we go.
Adal
The tally is JPC $40.50. Erin has $23.50. KJ is on the board. They have $5. Here we go. A numbering system. That's the clue. A numbering system. Erin, just a reminder, you have full Adals.
00:46:41
JPC
I know who I am. Introduced in 1963, modified in 1983, ten major groups numbered from zero to nine.
Erin
Uh, the word two, T-O, zero to nine. Farthest east locations begin with zero.
Adal
Um, Puzz. Oh boy, we tied. I need you to rock paper scissors.
Erin
Okay, I always do paper. Just so you know, I always do paper. Wait, wait, wait. No.
Adal
What's that?
Erin
The new way to decide. Okay.
Adal
Uh, just the year, when was I born?
Erin
$82.
Adal
84. Oh wait, no.
Erin
JPC gets a dollar.
Adal
JPC gets a dollar. That sucks so hard. I can't. I can't live in a world. I cannot. Hey Erin. JPC gets a dollar.
Erin
Erin gets it right though.
Adal
So Erin, you can puzzle in.
Erin
What's your answer?
Adal
I don't know.
Erin
Latitude and longitude.
JPC
I don't know. JPC?
Erin
Do a decimal system. You're both wrong. Great. Last clue.
00:47:42
???
Got it.
Adal
Ketchikan Alaska is $9.9950.
Erin
I think JPC had that. I want to say Zip Clothes.
Adal
It's Zip Clothes! That's $5.
Erin
JPC is up to $46.50. I deserve my $15 back and you know it and I know it.
Adal
Hey, you can win it back. You're being a good person! You can win it back, you just gotta play the game. How are we feeling? I feel fantastic. I'm just gonna blow this and I'm gonna blow this whole thing up. Let's do it. Okay, here we go. Here we go, here we go, here we go.
Erin
This is a food.
Adal
Okay.
Erin
Food.
Adal
Pause.
JPC
Yeah. Spaghetti. Nope. Dammit. Not a dog, a food. Got it. My bad. Hold the anchovies. Okay, um, puss. Yep.
???
Pizza.
JPC
Nope. Beware the Ides of March. Beware the Ides of March.
Adal
Hold the anchovies. Beware the eyes of March. Okay, okay. Oh, puss. Boy, KJ's doing something. Unless Erin gets it right, KJ gets it. Caesar salad.
00:48:44
???
It's a Caesar salad.
Adal
KJ gets a dollar, because they were pantomiming. It's hard for me to know just from pantomime. By the way, KJ did stab in the back, and that's Caesar. Yeah. Ootoo Bertun. Ootoo Bertun. Zip clothes. Zip clothes. Okay. Erin, did you have a complaint? No, I just was going to say I know I haven't used my things yet, but I want to. I just, I don't know. Okay. You want to, but what's the problem? I don't know. I just feel like I, I don't know. Go ahead. Okay. Okay.
Erin
All right. You having fun?
Adal
It's Amy one's ball grain. I mean, I really need the money, but... Here's why I need to decide that I have not decided yet. So there's $95 up for grabs.
???
Yes.
Erin
I feel like just the winner should get the money. Yes. And also KJ should get what they're entitled to. Yeah, only the winner. KJ gets nothing. But what happens to the loser's money? What should we do? Should we do one final question where we're... I don't know.
JPC
Can't everyone just get the money that they earn so no one goes home crying?
Erin
Whatever amount of the loser's money, I should be able to spend that on egg salad and the loser will have to eat that much egg salad off of one spoon. I'm gonna be sick.
00:49:50
JPC
I'm going to lose because I'm so far behind. If anyone can get egg salad and bring it to the live show, I'll take a bite. That's a promise.
Adal
Let's do another question. Here we go. This is a grab bag. This works to beat anything. Common marine animal. I know my co-hosts, and I listen to them whenever they speak. Okay. Okay. Erin, I'm going to give you a... I hope it's impossible.
???
Erin, I'm going to give you a softball, okay?
Erin
Because you're down. No, this is going to be hard. You've been really upset. What is JPC's real name? Joking.
JPC
Even if you know, let's not say it. What I want you to do is I want you to tell me, who does JPC's dad resemble according to his classmates? The Hootie and the Fluffish guy? That is correct.
Erin
What's that guys? Darius Rucker.
JPC
So Erin, this is full control.
Erin
KJ cannot steal, unfortunately.
???
Here we go.
JPC
Grab bag.
Erin
Common marine animal. Okay.
JPC
Another term for a drunk, which I've never heard this phrase, so I don't even know if that's helpful. Something you use to wash the car. A person that is correct.
00:50:54
Erin
It's the sponge.
JPC
Wow. I've never heard that either.
Erin
But it makes sense. Sponge. Drunk sponge. Alcohol. That makes sense to me. Erin's up to $33.50.
JPC
JPC at $46. KJ has $6.
Erin
Here we go. How we doing? Great. Yeah, we are doing great.
JPC
Fictional character.
Erin
His real father was... That brings us to another point in our show where it is time to hear about one of our hosts' uncles, Adal.
Adal
Who do you have for us today? I'm gonna say, this is Danny. Okay, Uncle Danny. And can we get one defining characteristic about Uncle Danny? He once threw a Hell's Angel member through his windshield. Holy crap.
Erin
He's a huge dude and he's a badass.
Adal
This is a big feature of the show. This is a fictional character. His real father was a senator. Puz. Take Kennedy, kill that girl. Ooh. I'll give you one more chance to rephrase it. Puz, John Kennedy. I'll give you a chance to rephrase it. Ted Kennedy killed that. Squirrel. Squirrel. His real father was a senator. KJ was my main squirrel. Without his glasses, he makes low passes. I hate that clue.
00:52:09
Erin
Without his glasses, he makes low passes. His real father was a senator.
Adal
Produces prose for Perry's paper. Grew up on a farm with with step-parents John and Martha. John and Martha. I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character?
???
I'm sorry, is this a fictional character?
JPC
I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character?
Erin
I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character?
JPC
I'm sorry, is this a fictional character? I'm sorry, is this a fictional character?
Adal
Or his lord. Or his lord. There is no god but said. Isn't all the money somewhere now? Isn't all the money somewhere now?
JPC
So JPC has $46.50. Erin Keif has $33.50.
Erin
Well, great. Real quick, whoever does this math gets an extra dollar.
00:53:11
JPC
No.
Adal
And KJ has 11 dollars. It'd be impossible for me to do this math. So, uh, we have 7. 57 plus 33. We're up to 91 dollars. There's still 4 dollars on the table.
???
4 dollars on the table.
JPC
So this will be the last card, and it's for 4 dollars. Got it. 4 dollars. Table dollars.
Adal
This is an object. Okay. Early models use cotton thread. I listen to my co-hosts when they talk, and I appreciate them. Erin, I want you to say it again. I want you to be a little more energetic. I listen to my co-hosts. I never stop listening to them. I love them. Erin, my sister's name rhymes with the Mexican food. What Mexican food is that? What Mexican food? That's my sister's name rhyme with. Fajita. I'm joking. Honestly, I'm going to give it to you. I was thinking of Quesadilla, which is less of a rhyme and more of... Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita!
00:54:14
???
Fajita! Fajita!
Adal
Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita!
???
Fajita! Fajita! Fajita!
Adal
Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita!
JPC
Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! Fajita! F
Adal
I would love it if Sidiya introduced herself to people and she's like... Sorry, who? Sidiya? Who? Kay Sidiya. Who? Fajita. Fajita Rifai? No, I was going to say, I would love it if she introduced herself to people and be like, my name is Sidiya and they're like, Sidiya, like Fajita?
Erin
I'm ready. Oh, she's going to be real mad at me.
JPC
So this is Erin's and Erin's alone. This is the very last card. It's for $4.
Erin
Early models used cotton thread.
JPC
Sorry, this was an object. Early models used cotton thread.
Erin
A current affair. A current affair. Socket to me.
JPC
Catch some rays. A current affair.
Erin
It's like a wire.
Adal
So the early models used cotton thread. I will say the cotton thread was used as a filament. So it was a light bulb. It is a light bulb. Wow. Thomas Middleditch. So here's what we have. JPC has $46.50, Erin has $37.50, KJ has $11. We're going to lock off KJ's amount. They get that regardless of win or lose. All right, so all the money is out on the table. We can learn about somebody's aunt? No, that sound means that we are entering into our fighting round. Adal, will you tell them what happens in the fighting round?
00:55:50
JPC
I don't know.
Adal
The fighting round is what Erin came up with, which I think is a brilliant idea. What's going to happen is, JPC, you currently have $46.50. Erin has $37.50. Thank you. There's no more money to win from Uncle Adal, but I will write a check to the winner.
Erin
However, for this final round, its winner wins whatever money they have at the end of it. Loser gets none of their money if they have any left. And we're just going to do a speed round, and for every card you get right, you steal a dollar from the other person's pool.
Adal
Make sense? Here we go. This is a classic story.
Erin
Took place in an imaginary and illogical world.
Adal
She'll never come for tea again. Puz. Alice in Wonderland. Alice in Wonderland. So that is a dollar for Erin. A dollar for Erin. Okay, okay. Here we go. Some of these are like real bad.
Erin
Ben Casey. I don't know what that is. Hold on. Let me go. Sorry about this.
00:56:53
JPC
This is a grab bag. Greek god of pastures and flocks.
Erin
What a disappointed critic may do to a play. How 49ers... Puz.
???
Pan.
Adal
Pan is the correct answer.
JPC
Yeah, 49ers. They have pans.
Adal
That's what they eat their breakfast in. Grab bag. What some designers dress. A status symbol to have in your office.
Erin
It may have bars.
Adal
It can be a real pain. Here we go. Occupation. A skin tightener. It's a gut-wrenching job. Stuffs turkeys, but not for dinner. Brings them back.
JPC
It's a taxidermist. It's a taxidermist, and that's someone who does taxes for dead animals.
Adal
I want to see a scene.
Erin
Erin, you're a taxidermist. JPC, you have brought something in for Erin to stuff. This is very important to me. Would you like to meet my wife?
00:58:01
Adal
Yes, of course I would love to. She's right in here.
Erin
I'd love to meet you.
Adal
Say hello to the nice man. Oh. Okay, so this is a stuffed bear. Yeah. Okay. Well, she was my wife and then she passed and this is how she would she wanted to be kept. This is her legacy. She was my wife while she was an alive bear.
Erin
Sure. She's a it's a bear wearing a wedding dress.
JPC
Yep. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, I have a Would you like to dance with my bare wife? Okay. I can put on some music.
Erin
Would you like to watch us dance?
JPC
I'm getting that you want me to want that.
Adal
Alright, well what do you have to stuff?
Erin
Just a couple of dogs.
Adal
Same. Here we go. We're going to fly here. A food. The French consume the most per capita.
Erin
More than 2,000 varieties. Puzz. Yep. Ass.
Adal
It is ass. Puzz. Macaroons. That was a joke, but keep going. Wisconsin overtook New York as the top US producer. Soft, semi-soft, semi-charmed, hard, and very hard. Puzz. Third Eye Blind. Free. Jeez. Cheese. That is cheese. Erin gets that. Film title. The dog was a drag. Meet the Griswolds. Wally World or Bust.
00:59:19
Erin
Pause. Yep. Um, Chovet Chase.
???
That is incorrect.
Adal
Dammit. I don't know. Okay. This is National Lampoon's vacation. Here we go. This is something that's done. This is a real card. I'm not making this up. I apologize. I am so sorry. This is something that's done. It takes a plastic surgeon. Makes mountains out of molehills. Only boobs go in for it.
Erin
It is breast enlargement.
Adal
Erin gets that card. They just say breast augmentation now. I want to see a scene. You are playing an inventor who has invented a breast augmentation machine.
???
What?
JPC
What? I'm in here. You come in here. Look what I made. Look what I made. Look what I made. Look what I made. Look what I made. What's this?
Adal
Well, actually, all right, hold on. We have to use an example.
JPC
Go get the bear in the wedding dress.
01:00:21
Adal
This is a grab bag. A type of sailboat. Harry Chapin sang a song about one. Al's favorite snack. Don't let it out of the bag. Buzz. Yep. A cat. That is a cat. Chemical elements. This is a chemical element.
JPC
First isolated on Earth in 1895, used to treat asthmatics.
Adal
Puzz.
Erin
Yep. Unobtanium.
Adal
Nope. Second most abundant element. Up, up, and away. Puzz.
???
Yep.
Adal
Helium. It is helium. Entertainer. We have two more. Entertainer helps build bodies, doesn't mask her identity. Puzz, Jim Carrey. Nope. A sunny disposition. Has she got you, babe?
???
Puz. Yep.
Adal
Cher. It is Cher. Last one! Film character. A hundred years old, speaks in grunts. Puz, Groot. Nope. Father is itchy, son is lumpy. What? Father is itchy, son is lumpy. Puz. Yep. Groot. Nope. I don't know. Seven feet two inches tall, patterned after the cowardly lion in Wizard of Oz. I have no idea. Yes. Group.
01:01:34
JPC
It is group. What is it? But you have to say it the correct way. A cockpit star in Star Wars. Oh, Chewy.
Erin
Full name?
Adal
Chewbacca.
Erin
JPC, can we get a middle and last name for Chewbacca? Okay, okay.
Adal
Peter Mayhew. I think he just died. He's the best away. Erin got that last one. Erin had seven. JPC had three. So Erin wins four of JPC's dollars.
JPC
That puts her at $41.50.
Adal
That takes, oh boy, this is real close. That takes JPC down to $42.50. So JPC has 42.50. Erin has 41.50. KJ walks away with 11. It's because you took that $15 from me early. So JPC you won by a dollar, you get $42.50, I will write you a check, and you get nothing, but hopefully if people like this it will return.
Erin
What do we think the hashtag should be if people want more of this? Jesus Christ.
Adal
Adal, the title of this game was easy to digest and put into a hashtag. What was the title of this game one more time? I think this is, by the way, the perfect hashtag.
01:02:41
Erin
The title of this game is Money, Money, Money, Puzzies, Puzzies, Puzzies. It pays to be right. Adal Rifai's Hyundai Dolly Give Away based on the book, Adal Tude, My Life in Riddies and Puzzies, Uncle Adal writes a check.
Adal
Money, money, money. Puzzies, fuzzies, fuzzies. It pays to be right.
???
Adal Rifai's Honey Dolly giveaway.
Adal
Adal Rifai's Honey Dolly giveaway. Based on the book Attletude, My Life and Riddies and Puzzies.
Erin
Uncle Adal writes a check. So I hashtag Uncle Adal writes a check if you want to see this game again. And I can tell you that $42.50 is going straight up my nose.
JPC
I'm going to buy some flow days. Oh, she's like Sigmund Freud. I would have given it away to like people in need. You just said you need money. Yeah, to give to people who need. Oh boy.
???
Let's plug stuff.
Erin
Let's plug stuff.
Adal
Number one thing we want to plug? Patreon. Every Friday we have new episodes for $5 a month. You get all those new episodes. There's already, I don't know, 17 banks? There's a bunch of them. So there's a bunch already in there. You're gonna get new ones every week. You basically get double the amount of us. The trouble. So if that's something you want, great. If that's something you want to curse others with, give it as a gift.
01:03:49
Erin
But that's patreon.com slash Hey Riddle Riddle.
Adal
Myself, Adal Rifai, I want to plug some podcasts that I was recently on. I was on Star Wars Minutes, so check that out with Magic Tavern at the Star Wars Celebration. I was on Omencast, which is a wonderful sort of RPG supernatural podcast, so check that out. And also I want to apologize, I think last time I promoted them I said the title wrong. I was on Titanium Physicists' podcast, so check that out as well. I talked with Dr. Katie Bauman, who took the first picture of a black hole. I felt more stupid than I ever have in my life, but it was a wonderfully fascinating conversation. So check that out.
???
JPC?
Adal
Yep. You can follow me on Twitter, at jpsofly.
JPC
You can follow me on Instagram, at sharkbarkman. And that's pretty much it. Follow me on Instagram at Erin Keif 10 and I'll plug all my shows there.
Adal
And if you want free tickets to any of my shows, just message me on there. Hell yeah. I also want to say if we get 1,500 five-star reviews on iTunes, we're going to do another AMA. I think we're getting close there. So do a push for that. Everyone tell your friends. Run tell that. Do kids say that anymore? Yeah, sure. Why wouldn't they? Do kids still flip water bottles? Yeah, and you know what else kids do? They get high and they go all the way up to the planet. Jupiter! Bye forever. This has been Hey Riddle Riddle created by Adal Rifai. Starring Erin Keif and John Patrick Coan. AG Snyder did the editing. MRE parents in the music. Logo created by Emily Cardenas and Emo Enophores. That was a Headgum Podcast.