Which Riddle Riddle?

The doctor was the mother. He stood on a block of lights. Oh, then we're going to finish. It was the cabin of an airplane.

He stabbed him with an ice cream. And the orders seemed right.

Welcome to a very special AMA episode of Hey Riddle Riddle. This is due to the fact that we have 1,000 five-star reviews. Woo! Wow.

Happy birthday to us.

Give us a spin.

And we promised we would do this AMA that is an ass mouth ass for all of our fans.

Just like your favorite stream from Rook Win for a Dream, this is ass mouth ass. Now, if you're listening to this and you did not leave us a iTunes review, go ahead and hit that pause button. Come back to it later. When you leave a review. But yeah, if you haven't left a review, please do so. We would really appreciate that, but we've hit a thousand, so fuck you. Also, we need to let you know, up top immediately, we have a live show in LA coming up. We're going to be at the Hollywood Improv on May 12th, which is Mother's Day. Bring your wives, bring your kids, bring your mommies, bring your dads. Bring your pens. Erin will drink them.

And your riddles. We definitely bring riddles.

We definitely need riddles. We're coming with none. Otherwise, it's just going to be polite conversation and small talk. So that's going to be Mother's Day. Please check that out. You can go to headgum.com slash live to find tickets. We really hope to see you there and we'll be in town for a few days. So I'm sure we'll say hi to as many people as we can and hopefully go to Disneyland. Erin, you going to Disneyland?

That's the plan.

I plan on going. So we're going to get into our AMA. These are AMA questions that we received on Twitter, Instagram, through email, and on our Patreon Discord. You two ready for this?

I am. I'm absolutely ready to answer questions. I'm happy to do so, and you're not going to catch me in any of your legal tricks, Adal. I'm not going to get up here on the stand and get flummoxed and flummustered and floraxed. Flummoxed and flummustered.

Did you kill all those squirrels?

Okay, first of all, I'm so sorry. You're not gonna catch up and full mustard me. Literally, no one asked an AMA question, did I kill the squirrels, right?

Very first question.

Did Ted Kennedy kill those squirrels?

Kill that squirrel.

Ted Kennedy killed that squirrel. John, you always do this!

Alright, I'm ready. I think it's way funnier if Ted Kennedy killed that squirrel.

Extra cut of all of the times Erin on any one of our podcasts has said, I'm ready. It's, it's whatever. She's like, okay, we're done with this. I'm ready.

It's her, it's her wink, wink, nudge, nudge to move things along.

I'm an Australian shepherd. I just heard you towards the content that we promised.

All right. My goal here is to get at least 15 minutes in without answering a single question.

Well, you succeeded for three of them. Damn. So here's the number one most important question. And these are chosen at random. What is the best kind of pizza? Now we all three reside in Chicago. Yes, which is Pizza Town USA Midwest. I actually hate deep-dish pizza. I despise it. I think it's terrible

I have to ask you, Adal, because I don't have these questions in front of me, is the answer what's the best kind of pizza or what's the best kind of pizza? Like bagel bites are the best kind of pizza. Kind of pizza, yeah.

Or like English muffin pizzas.

Hot pockets, kind of pizza. Red Baron breakfast pizza.

Italian sandwich. I like like a thin crust caprese pizza.

I'm going to say, I like thin crust or New York style, and I'm going to say toppings, gotta go green olives, gotta go artichoke hearts. I will say if you get half green olives and half pineapple, I'm coming to that party.

Wow. My standard being a vegetarian is a black olive and green pepper. It's my favorite pizza topping. And my pizza tastes like swing over time, but right now what I'm really into is like the pan style Detroit pizza, like that rectangular pizza. You guys know what I'm talking about? Like Jets pizza. I love that. I love that. Like a little buttery crust.

And that's the pizza that Paul McCartney makes you?

Yeah, and then I have a set of wings.

Shoot me! Shoot me! You have to stop me.

No, that was a perfect joke. You're our king now. We did it.

You did it. The perfect joke. Upon based on his wings. On a bonus app. All right. This should be probably one we addressed pretty soon. How long do you estimate until you run out of usable riddles?

Busted. Probably really soon. It's a funny thing because people complain about us not doing enough riddles, but if we did a lot of riddles, we'd run out faster. So we're not sure what to do.

Here's what I'll say. In the known universe, there are 12 good riddles. We've done hundreds, but there's only 12 good ones. I think we can go 200 episodes based on the riddle books we have and what's out there. Stories with holes. God bless us. So I think we can do that. And if we mix things up every once in a while, but I'd say 200 episodes max. And then we have to do a hard pivot.

Hey Riddle.

The other thing is that, like Adal said, there are like a limited finite number of good riddles out there. The other thing is that there are an infinite number of riddles that people make themselves. So people send us like riddles all the time and it'll be like, also people will say, this is my favorite thing to get in an email. Hey, I don't think you've done this riddle. Like we just have. We absolutely have. And they'll like keep sending us repeat riddles.

And you call those fans names behind their back. What do you call them again?

Perfect. But I do think that when people send us riddles that they themselves write. I mean, there's an infinite number of those out in the world. So I think that that will give us longevity there.

We need you fans or not even fans. Most of you are probably just listeners.

We need you fans.

We need your creativity so make us some bespoke riddles. You can always email us riddles at hrrpodcast.gmail.com. So please do that.

And we're kind of threatening you because if you don't, we'll fucking stop. Yeah. There will be no podcast. And then what? Then you have to subscribe to our Patreon.

No, I'll have to hang out with JPC at a restaurant? I don't want to do that.

Wait, where am I at?

I don't know.

You're there too? If you're at a restaurant with me, I will make a scene.

Your JPC's chair? I don't know what you do. I don't know your life.

That's how committed I am to object work. Oh, obvious chair. Okay, here we go. Who is each of your dream guests for the show and what podcast would each of you like to guest on most? Oh, okay. So your dream guest for this show and then what podcast you'd like to guest on the most.

I will say, I'll go first. I think my dream guest for this show would be Paul F. Tompkins. I love Paul F. Tompkins. I mean, obviously he's like Dr. Podcast out there.

Did you know if you just use his initials, it's... Well, yeah, I did know that.

But I think he's awesome. Podcast that I would love to go on, I would say... Your big Hollywood handbook. I love the Hollywood handbook, but if I could choose to go on a podcast, it would be Teacher's Lounge, which is like a Stitcher premium show. I think actually some of the episodes are free, but I was telling Adal, Teacher's Lounge reminds me of how I used to improvise with my... Which is well? Yeah, well, no, it's not well. With my improv team Lawdog before, we kind of split up a couple of years ago, but it was like that hyper yes and, I just, I love that so much. Absolutely.

When we first started this podcast and you asked me about Dream Guests, I said Paul F. Tompkins right out of the gate because I've loved him a very good time. I would also, there's like so many great comedians I'd love to have on. I think I would love to have more people who are like, who write riddles professionally or do like escape rooms professionally.

Like Nathan Levi?

Yeah, like that that's my dream. Because I think that would add a little bit more, like something cool to the show. Add a little bit more. Add a little bit more. And then if I want to go on a podcast, it's probably why I won't. Pudkast. Pudkast.

Pudkast.

As we say in my native filibuster.

Probably.

Probably why won't you date me?

Erin, what podcast do you want to be on? Oh boy, oh brother.

My God, I walked right into that. Or, wait wait, don't tell me. Because I told this to Adal recently, I called in every weekend in high school to try to get on, wait wait, don't tell me, for like four years and I never let put my call through. And I want to get on the show and then complain to them that they never let me

I had dinner with Peter Segel a few months ago and he said he does not like you.

Alright, well can you tell him that a very earnest high school girl didn't have too many friends and really wanted to get through?

I said I have a friend who tried to call into the show and he described you specifically and said yeah she's the worst.

Oh that nerd. Every time I meet a celebrity I carry a list of all the people that I know on me and I ask them to really quick go down the list and just mark X's next to the people that they're not into.

Do any of you play- Did you enter it? Oh, no I did not. I mean, just for like, I think it would be really fun and I'd geek out hard. Lin-Man-Mel-Momamba. Oh, Lin-Man-Mel-Maramba. Maramba? I'm sure he'll come on now after we did that. But I feel like he would be great. I mean, I have a bunch. I feel like Lauren Lapkis would be wonderful. Paul Tompkins, Janet Varney. I mean, yeah, Andy Daley.

Darcy Cardin.

Darcy Cardin. So yeah, a lot of those podcast adjacent folks. Podcast adjacent is the wrong term. They're in podcasts.

Yeah, but they're also adjacent to them. That's the beauty of terms. Yeah, exactly.

And then one podcast I would like to be on, I think I gotta go with Moo Bim Bam. My brother, my brother, and me. That and Pop Culture Happy Hour are the two shows that I binge listen to. And Reply All I think is really good. But there's no reason for me to ever be on Reply All. Do any of you play any instruments? I used to play alto saxophone and I would play, what is that, chim chimery or whatever? Chimichurri. I used to play chimichurri, which is like a green sauce.

A little bit garlic in there. But that was just for two years and then I stopped. Cool, and the question was, did you used to play an instrument for two years and then stop, right? It says, do any of you play any instruments?

First it's just saying no, I thought you'd just have some fucking fun with it.

Well, I'll say no. Did you ever play instruments? Yeah, I did. Man, I wish someone would have asked that question. I played clarinet when I was in the city.

Me too.

Fourth grade, and then I played bass guitar when I was in seventh and eighth grade. And I guess I have junior or freshman year of high school.

You played Claire Danes at Annette Benning. I played Claire Danes at Annette Benning on a one minute show. A one minute show.

A one minute format show.

Hey Annette, it's me, Claire. I don't know you. Scene. Scene.

Erin? I played a good amount of piano growing up. I have a ukulele, but that doesn't count. Yeah, that's something I really wish I could do. My boyfriend is like an incredible drummer, like really, really excellent. And sometimes I get really sad that I'm not like awesome at something so we could play music together.

Does he just play like Wipeout with his shirt off?

Just the middle of the day in his apartment. Look at this! Look at me! Look at me! Wipeout!

Who are your favorite Muppets? Beaker. Never watch the Muppets.

Rizzo. Rizzo and Gonzo as a combo. Who's your favorite character from Grease?

Can someone remake Grease with Rizzo? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets?

Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for Muppets? Grease but for M You said you never watched the Muppets? No. What did you watch in lieu of?

I don't know what that means.

That Louis Anderson show?

Life of Louis? I don't know what I watched in lieu of the Muppets.

I just, I don't ever, I never like was into the Muppets or Sesame Street or... But Muppets, the Muppets umbrella encapsulates Sesame Street?

Star Wars? Labyrinth.

Star Wars? Labyrinth? Fraggle Rock? You don't watch any of these? I think I must have watched Fraggle Rock. NYPD Blue?

Yes, I'm sorry. Westworld?

I've said this on the show a bunch of times. Muppets was maybe my biggest comedic influence growing up.

And your favorite movie is Muppet Stick Manhattan? Great Muppet Caper. Great Muppet Caper. I've never seen that.

It's so good. Can we watch it together?

Anna Caper's like an olive?

Yep.

Oh, I love a nice little caper.

I think that might be a fun thing for us to do the Patreon is watch that movie altogether.

Is that, so are we making a verbal contract that we'll watch great Muppet capers?

I'm writing it in blood right now. I wish you had said verbal contract faster.

Yeah, but that's my blood.

Don't complain. Can you imagine? Yes, mistress.

Can you imagine? Erin, what if I just started to say yes, mistress to you?

I would throw up to 30% more than I would, but I'd love it.

Not in front of you, just in general. Because you'd be pregnant. Yes, mistress. When did all three of you meet for the first time? This is going to be a hard one to win.

When did the three of us train?

How do we train? Have we met? Have we met?

So I think we've talked about this on the show before, but let's recap.

Okay. I met JPC and then I met Erin and then we all three met. That's true.

How did you meet JPC?

I met JPC. I feel like just around IO. Yeah. I think we just started hanging out. Then we would play board games together. And then I brought them into world news.

And then we got into that D&D game together that we've been playing for like three years.

Yeah. So, but I think, were you sitting in with World News by the time we played D&D or not? It must have been.

Yeah.

Cause that's like three years ago. Yeah. And then I don't know. The first time we met was in passing.

Yeah. So the first time I met Adal, I think I met JPC first, but the first time I met Adal, I had seen him perform a bunch. And then just knew him from around. You wrote me a vicious note. Yeah. Just be like, boo. Less cats.

Learn how to park.

I don't have a car.

That's a handwritten note that Erin's given me before. Learn how to park. And I'm like, what?

She put it on my face and I'm like, that's not a windshield.

Written in your blood.

Yes, mistress. You can tell everybody, this is your blood.

I was taking classes at the den, which is great, by the way.

And the den is what Adal calls his living room. Hey, I've got to watch TV, can you leave? I'm taking classes at the rumpus room.

Do you know Jamie Bliss? You know Jamie Bliss. Jamie Bliss and I were in the same class and you were a sub teacher in the class and I did a scene and you laughed really really hard and I thought I was the coolest person. I was like oh my god I'm in Adal laughing.

Oh I read something really funny on my phone.

It was a text I said to myself. All of my confidence is oh my god. Do you remember the scene? Yeah, it was an exercise focusing on the first like three lines. Okay.

Do you remember the three lines?

Clearly this is a huge moment in your life and I don't remember at all. Jamie came in and I forget what rapper she was. She was like, hey baby, I'm blank and she said the rapper's name. And I was like, why are you in my bushes? And you were like, you laughed because you were like, that's sort of bad improv, Erin. Did I say that? No, you were like, you're sort of making her seem like a crazy person and that's a fun hole she has to dig herself out of, but I think it surprised you.

You just jagged my memory, I now remember that class.

Really?

Yeah, and that line still holds up as being very funny.

I do remember a scene that I did when Adal was coaching my playground team and Adal had brought in an exercise which was taking... This is his Little League team that practiced on a playground.

Yes.

Adal had brought in an improv exercise which was taking like two famous or known historical figures that had interactions together and then you improvising as those characters but not with any like specific situation.

Can I swoop in? Because I'm trying to remember. Did I make you Judas?

Yes. And I'm trying to think, I think it was John Nakowitz, but I don't remember who the other person was, but it was Judas and Jesus and the whole scene was us meeting and then walking away from each other and turning back and being like, I'm going to miss you, man. The context was that we were always about to talk about the betrayal, but then we just kept moving past it. And I remember that Adal was doing that thing where he is like, this sucks, I fucking hate it, giggling into his hand because he was laughing very hard. And I was like, oh, I remember that scene being like, yeah, we crushed that scene.

Two other quick things about meeting both of you. I auditioned for a playground team and you didn't even give me a callback.

I don't remember that.

Let it be a known.

Hey Erin, you probably had a shitty audition.

I definitely did. That's not the point of what I'm saying. And then GPC, I said this before in the show, but the first, we met at CIC and I saw you perform a bunch, but the first conversation we ever had was on a porch on Easter, I think, one year. And we talked about Veep for like 20 minutes.

Oh yeah, I was wearing a big bunny suit.

You're wearing a big bunny suit. You're a real perv.

The first conversation we had was on a porch on Easter. Sounds like a Tracy Letts play.

But this is another very nice thing. Adal also is the reason why I got a lot of opportunities I have in Chicago. Like after like seeing me around he thought of me for some like, what was it? Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle.

Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle.

Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle.

Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle.

Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle.

Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle.

Hey Riddle.

Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle. Hey Riddle.

First of all, you're not in my phone. You're just not in my phone.

You're not in my phone, dude. I changed your name to unknown number.

I see the text but it says unknown number. Mine says dominoes.

So I could have real disdain for you when you're not making the... First of all, Adal, I'll answer your text but I don't know what help means. I need a little context. I thought we were talking about favorite Beatles albums.

I don't know what I miss you means.

I'm ready for another question. You can save one book in your book collection, what book, and why.

Oh, my book collection, the one that I have. I'll say this, my favorite book, a book that I've reread maybe three or four times is Catch-22 by Joseph Heller. I think that book is absolutely hilarious. The Assyrian? The Assyrian? The Assyrian, yeah. I'm a big fan of that book, Milo Minderbinder. Very fun.

I would say, so maybe my three favorite books are The World According to Garp by John Irving, The Humans by Matt Haig, and then 10th of December which is a collection of stories by George Saunders. I'd say The Humans because The Humans is like one of those books that's so so funny and so so beautiful and so makes you so emotional. And then the book ends with a list of sexual collisions. Wait, what did I say? The Kamasutra. The Kamasutra is such a funny book.

That's the way the book ends.

It is pretty funny. You can put your dick in that way? That doesn't make sense, but it's fun. But the book, The Humans by Matt Haig, ends with a list of like a hundred reasons Thanks for watching! Erin, and you said your favorite book is Johnny Depp.

Johnny Depp. I can't read.

Erin, you said your favorite book is The Notebook?

The movie. Not the book. I'm trying to think of a book I would save as probably a signed book that I have. Like a signed copy of something.

And in your head the book's like drowning or there's a fire and then you save it?

Yeah. It's like I'm on the, we just did Titanic saying the book's in the water and I'm Kate Winslet. But I have a book that's signed by Stephen Sondheim that my aunt sent him being like, Oh, I don't mean to mansplain.

You said it wrong. Stephen King.

Oh, no, no.

JPC and I made the same joke.

That he was like, hi Erin, thanks so much for your enthusiasm, Steven Sondheim. So I'd maybe say that. That's fantastic. Or my mom is a librarian and cares so much about reading and books. It's kind of, it's great. But when we were growing up, we had to wait in a lot of lines to get like authors to sign books.

Did you say that she was a librarian or a librarian?

She's a linebacker for the Rams? Yes mistress. And I have a copy of the Giver signed by Lois Lowry that I think that I would save. Like there's a couple other ones like that.

I'd give her that book right to the fucking trash.

A one called Enthusiasm by Polly Shulman that is a young shore. Oh my god. We sold. She'd be an adult author, but I wore that book out when I was like 14.

I guess my favorite book is Biodome.

I'm ready for the next question.

I wore that book out. Can I ask is your mom still a librarian?

She is.

Where can people find her?

Leave her alone. But if you want book recommendations, it's so funny because my mom is a librarian, but her favorite genre of book is nonfiction stories about people surviving on the ocean. Which sounds specific, but there are hundreds of books.

Yeah, I've seen Open Water.

Yeah, it's basically just like, Erin, they were on the ship. And Erin, I'll tell you, they didn't think they were going to make it.

And they had the poop off board.

It was nuts.

I'm gonna use that answer you just gave to launch and to pick it back onto this question which I just saw. Is that legal? Which is what's the... what's up? Is that legal? Didn't you say that you're not gonna get bogged down in any of my legalese? Yes, but I'll bug everyone else down.

You killed those squirrels!

Technically, you killed that squirrel. So this question is, what's the one thing we'd be most surprised to learn about you? And I'm going to immediately latch onto what you just talked about, which is a big thing about me that people probably don't know or would guess is that I'm terrified of water. Like, not like pools or something. But I've been to the ocean many times and people are like, let's go into the ocean. I'm like, I can't. Or we'll be on like a boat and they're like, let's go snorkeling and scuba diving. And I'm like, I really can't. So I've been snorkeling once in Hawaii, but it was in like, I mean, I never left my feet. So I just like dipped down my head. I never left my feet, but I am terrified of the ocean.

Whoa. I wouldn't have known that.

Yeah.

JPC?

This is one thing that you two don't know about me or one thing that people would know about me?

It's one thing we'd be surprised to know about you. So I think you use the audience.

Oh, the audience would be surprised to know. I am a pretty hardcore into budgeting. So I have apps and spreadsheets and like retirement accounts and I like I scrimp and I save and I pinch pennies. Shrimp. I shrimp and I clam. And I guess I can be pretty, like, if there is the difference between like going and getting something delivered and me walking like six blocks like in the snow, I'll just like, I'm like, come on, I'll walk six bucks. I'm not gonna spend $4 on the delivery fee. Plus you got a tip. So I'm pretty, I'm pretty miserly.

Sometimes I've thought about asking you to help me. Paying you a couple hundred dollars and being like, fix my life financially.

I'd also help everybody for free because I love doing it and I have helped many people that have been like, hey, can you just help me with this? And I'm like, yes, we'll sit down and we'll give you some homework. But it's something I love doing because I love talking about it and going through that process.

Well your shirt says I love lamp and that's a reference to the big comedy guy.

The thing about budgeting is once you do it once it's like you kind of set it and it's like that's your budget now and it's set so I really do like helping other people do it because then you get to like go back and do it again and get your hands dirty which I can't like I can't just like blow up my financial life and start that over again.

Cool.

I guess I could.

I'm trying to think of what mine is. In the context of the show, and I think it's something I've talked about before, is that people thinking that I laugh easily at things. Like I feel like because I am on Hey Riddle Riddle and you hear me laugh so hard at Adal and JPC, I feel like I'm not an easy laugh.

Do you find that people who appreciate our show come up and try and get you to laugh or something?

Not necessarily.

People take all the shit out of me.

My boyfriend was just saying, he was like, he recently was like, you're an easy laugh. Like between me and him. Wall drumming, shirtless. Yeah, like... He, but I was like, no, no, I'm in love with you. And then also I'm in love with JPC. Of course I'm laughing at all their jokes. But I think there are 10 people in the world who make me belly laugh hard, and two of those people are in this room. So I think it's a little misleading. I think I'm a little bit more. It's not that I don't think people are funny. I feel pretty intensely anxious around a lot of people, so it's hard for me to relax enough to laugh really hard.

I'll also say that Adal and I probably have this same problem because it's a podcast and you can't see our faces but we a lot of the times have like this like resting fuck you face which I know I don't really see a lot of improv shows anymore but I know when I was seeing a lot of improv shows people would like not want me in the audience because of how much my face was just like I fucking hate this because I probably did but not all the time and it just like that's the natural resting Thanks for watching!

If we get 2,000 reviews. 2,000 reviews, I will shave my wife. So this is a good one to go to. Could you give us a little insight into what your recording process is like? So we talked about in studio we have resting asshole face. So for each episode I think we assign, we record three episodes every Sunday, right?

And let me just say, we record three hour long episodes in about four hours. We get in pretty quick.

Pretty efficient, and we don't cut much. There's not much fat we trim, as you can hear in our episode. But we usually do, we record every Sunday, three episodes. We record in the Cards Against Humanity studio. We have KJ Snyder do the editing. And we usually discuss who's going to be doing what. So we'll say, Erin's going to do a Patreon episode. Adal and JPC will do a regular feed. And then we'll swap that out depending on what we need.

Due to the nature of what we do as well, we kind of leave each other in the dark a little bit because, you know, so much is like surprise and it's riddles and it's like, we don't, unless it's something like really weird, we don't really run it by each other first.

I didn't run the Sherlock episode by you guys. No. And that was really weird.

Yeah.

Were you guys upset? No. It's more fun that way. I think people are also surprised to know that we recorded the first seven episodes months and months and months before we recorded the eighth episode. That's true. So all of those sort of live in a bubble and I also think in those seven episodes maybe you can hear it but I honestly thought I was like it's there's a chance that there's never no no one ever hears this and I'm just doing this for fun and also it was this weird out-of-body experience when those episodes came out because I had no memories of what was in it. And people were like, JBZ killed a raccoon. And I was like, what?

What are you talking about?

Oh, I should, I should read in a scene. So yeah, I think like maybe people can tell a shift between episode seven and eight, but it's just interesting.

I feel like with Magic Tavern or with this, because everything's done in such advance, that people will come up to me and be like, uh-oh, two slaps on the wrist for being a dum-dum. And I'm like, what's up? And they're like, two slaps on the wrist for being a dum-dum. Episode 47 and I'm like, I don't know. And they're like, it came out like two weeks ago and I'm like, that was recorded last year. But people want to reference, you know, I think it's the same. You lose track of what you've said and what you've done.

We recorded the first episode in April of last year.

And we didn't release it until July. So it's like Stane said, It's been a long time without you, my friend. That's Dean. Yeah. So we'll go immediately into this. What are the unique challenges of doing improv for audio? I think keeping energy up because you're seated. So it's like you're trying to be physically expressive. And when you're doing characters, sometimes it can be low energy. So I think keeping energy up is hard. Yeah. What else?

I've noticed that because sometimes we record our.

Sometimes we talk over each other is a big one.

That's perfect timing and that is a perfect joke. You two are killing it tonight. We record the regular feed episodes first usually tonight. So sometimes I feel like those sometimes you have to like summon energy and they come slow and then we usually record Patreon last and that's why I think those feel like dizzy and like fever dreamy because we've been here so long. Yeah, I think it's definitely I mean I actually like doing the audio like improv because I think I really like doing like clear initiations and knowing things right out of the gate. Which is also what World News is.

World News is all like pointed initiations where it's not like it's not a lot of organic play which is what a lot of our training is which is like sit and see what happens what's in front of you how's the other person looking at you what emotion are you feeling what's the character right with World News it's the exact opposite where it's like What's like an intelligent poll that you can pointedly clue somebody into so they can play within that world?

I will also say that KJ's sound editing and sound design helps immensely for the final finished product because for us it's like we're doing riddles and then we're jumping right into the scene. KJ's crying. Not about this. KJ's watching Dear John on their computer. They just ate four hot peppers. Dear John. But when KJ puts the editing in it like adds this tonal difference to the improv parts and I feel like that it makes it like this like more refined finish product which is easier to listen to I think.

Absolutely.

But also I think sometimes we sabotage scenes way more because we're like trying to be silly with each other.

Because we beastie boys. Well also they don't have to last. Like anything that we get to just needs to like get to something ridiculous so we can go away and come back to real life which is riddles. Riddles is life.

Have we said that on the podcast?

Get that tattoo and I will pay for your brother to go on a date.

No joking, JPC. The one I have pulled up is do you all have any tattoos? What's the worst tattoo idea you've ever had? I don't think any of us have tattoos, right?

I have no tattoos. My improv team Wetbuss has almost gotten a tattoo a few times, and you might appreciate this. If we got a Wetbuss tattoo, I'd want to get the outline of Harrison Lott's hair, and that's it.

Hey, what year, you know? 2016. 2016, okay, that makes sense. I have no tattoos, no plans to get a tattoo. Can I pause at this? Yes please.

If we get 3,000 5 star reviews, the three of us will go get Hey Riddle tattoos.

Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole.

Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole.

Oh wait for Ty my butthole.

Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole. Oh wait for Ty my butthole.

On his face.

So my girlfriend and I were talking about tattoos and she was like, she said that her theory was she doesn't have any tattoos but she was like if I was gonna get a tattoo she'd want to get something very like basic just to get her first one done with so she didn't have to think about it. She'd want like an outline of a heart and I was like that is very basic and I was like if you get an outline of your heart as a tattoo I will get Bruce Springsteen lyrics. I don't care what song.

You go in and they'll go, what lyrics? And you go dealer choice.

I'll say, get an album and just whatever moves you, my man.

Nebraska.

And I want Bruce Springsteen lyrics somewhere on my phone. Hey little girl, is your daddy home? Not that one. Anyone but that one. You said dealer choice.

Your girlfriend's about to get an email from me. A very convincing email.

You know, do you guys know Michael O'Brien? He used to go by Pat O'Brien. He's now Michael O'Brien. He created the show AP Bio, which is phenomenal. He used to be on SNL for a long time. He famously, in the improv community, wanted to get a tattoo just to get it over with because he's like, no matter what I get for my first tattoo, I'm going to regret it. So let me immediately regret it. So he went into a tattoo studio and got a big NSYNC logo on his shoulder. That was just his first tattoo.

That's so awful.

And then when Justin Timberlake was hosting SNL, or was a guest or something, he showed it to him to be like, look at this tattoo. And they were like, what's good? I thought he was just like, I guess, like a weirdo fan.

That's so funny.

I don't have any tattoos, but we did, Arnie and I talked about getting a magic tavern tattoo. Tattoon. Tattoon.

That's where Yoda's from, right?

Tattoon. Tattoon. Saltwater Tafoon. But we talked about getting a magic tavern tattoo, but then I believe Matt was not into it. So I think it was something the three of them called like, we should bond over this, but then Matt didn't want to do it. So we respected that. But I might get at some point, I might actually get like a badger or something. That's been such a big part of my life that I'm like, I should maybe do something. I also talked about getting there's a tattoo artist in L.A. that I like that does like campfire scenes. And I feel like I would want to do some sort of like outdoorsy campfire scene perhaps.

I see people with like sleeves or quarter sleeves and I'm like, I think that would be cool.

I'm not talking about shirts, dude.

Anyway.

Yeah, I like sleeves.

I don't think I'll ever get a tattoo because then I couldn't get into Jewish cemeteries and that's why I'm spending like 95% of my time.

My brother-in-law is covered in head to toe in tattoos and he has a giant Salvador Dali picture on his back. Cool. Let's see. Not a tattoo picture. What's the one superpower you would not want?

Oh, that's so easy. Reading minds.

Getting fucked by bees. Not being able to climb a ladder.

That's a superpower?

A superpower that you don't want? Reading minds?

Yeah, of course reading minds. What? That's awful.

I would not, I would feel like super strength would be bad because you'd like open a door and rip it off the hinges or you'd high five someone and kill them. Like, super strength.

Time travels too much responsibility too.

I'm in the middle of talking.

Yeah, she got your ass.

I'm not climbing up butters. Got your ass. I got your ass with revenge from earlier, remember? Grandpa, give it back. Got your ass.

What's Mr. Fantastic? He gets all bendy? I don't want that. He's stretchy. I don't want stretchy. Fuck that.

Why not? That's super useful.

I don't want it.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm thinking of the fantastic.

Did you say fantastic or incredible? Fantastic.

So Mr. Fantastic can stretch. He's like rubber, basically. Stretch Armstrong. And that's the same as Mrs. Incredible.

But Adal and JBC, would you want one that because of the power you have like a ton more responsibility to use it to help people?

Well, with great power comes great responsibility, Uncle Ben's rice. Was that from? Huh? The back of Uncle Ben's rice?

Yeah, I think so. I mean, yes, if I had a superpower. I mean, if I could pick any superpower that I want, I've always said this, I've said this for years, my superpower would be infinite blood.

That's my favorite Avengers movie.

Infinite Blood would be great because you can't die from blood loss. So I would like go into a restaurant and I would eat a nice meal. Maybe like it's time to pay the bill. I was like, I'm not going to pay the bill. They're like, well, so you're going to have to pay the bill. I'd just cut my throat and spray blood all over the restaurant. And then I'd calmly get up and be like, well, I guess our business here is done. Walk out of the restaurant covering getting blood.

And then doctors are like, John, you slit your throat open. You are going to die just because you're Losing infinite blood.

It's infinite blood. No, it's infinite blood. It's always... That doesn't mean you can't die. Do you know how death works? Of course you can.

Well, I can't die from blood loss. You can't die from blood loss, but... Hey, don't... I love how you rip out your intestines and you're like, look at me now.

No, no, no. I never said that.

Infinite blood. That's mine. Next question. You are a member of the Spice Girls. What is your spice name? Plaid Spice. A JPC would be Horny Spice. Scottish. Scottish Spice. I would be Backward Hat Spice. Horny Spice.

I would be Baby Spice. No.

Can I be Budget Spice?

I'd be Sleepy Spice.

Budget Spice.

Of course I'd be Sleepy Spice.

You would be Sleepy Spice. Sleepy Spooky Spice.

I'm giving you love. Hey, can you all keep it down? I'm crunching the numbers. Budget Spice. I'm giving you 4% and you're matching me up to your Gave you up to six. That's fantastic. Here's a very specific one. Can we get Rob White as a guest? Who asked that? I don't know.

Somebody on Instagram. He's too classy for this show. Rob doesn't listen to podcasts, he doesn't understand them, and he would never guest on this show.

Rob Wai is my best friend, but I've tried to bring him on Magic Tavern and he hates fantasy. He also famously will not watch cartoons. So even like Bob's Burgers and stuff like that.

Remember when he went on that rant about Disney World? Oh he hates theme parks, yeah.

But I love him. He's a good guy opinion.

He's also so funny. I wish he would come on the show, but I doubt it.

He's incredibly funny. So if you come see World News Tonight and Rob is in the show, he's the guy who looks like Calvin's dad and Calvin the Hobbs.

He does! He does!

Please go up to him and just say, what do we want people to say to him? You look like Calvin's.

You're a coward.

Go on a podcast, you coward. Yeah, say go on a podcast, you coward, to a stranger. Who are your favorite stand-up comedians? I really like Todd Barry, who is somebody I've always liked. I just like his cadence, and he just has a very weird delivery. Obviously, Mitch Hedberg is incredible. Let's see, Bill Cosby, Louis C.K.

Wait, wait, wait. What year is it?

What year is it? In high school, my sister and I were obsessed with Paula Tompkins stand up. I also loved Tim Minchin so much. Tim Meadows. Yeah, Tim Meadows.

Tim Minchin is the... Australian. He's so weird, right?

Yeah, he wrote Matilda.

Oh yeah. I don't think I've seen any of...

He does a special where he has an entire London orchestra behind him because he's a musical comedian. And it is so good. And when I lived in Australia, that was like on everyone's TV all the time. People live there.

Fantastic.

What about you?

John Mulaney, probably.

Oh yeah, good one. I was like Eddie Murphy. I saw Eddie Murphy raw and delirious when I was like 12. Oh boy. And that really rocked my world. I feel like that's where I learned a lot of my naughty words.

I don't know that I watch a lot of stand-up anymore. If it comes on Netflix, I never turn on to it. I will say that I watched the Adam Sandler one on Netflix and it was very good.

Wow, really?

It's surprisingly good, yeah. Where I was like, this will be weird, but he's still got it. He's still got it in a big way, yeah. What is the worst prompt for an improv scene you've ever been given? I don't know, JPC gave me a prompt.

What do you mean?

Was it on this show? No, I think in general, in life. So I remember being, I think this was Second City general aud... No, Second City Retainment auditions, I think. It's like you go into the training center, and after level two you have to audition to keep your spot in the training center, I believe. But there's an audition where I go out, so it's like you're, there's a back line, you go out two at a time or one at a time and then somebody joins you. And I went out and started doing something, like just started doing object work. And somebody ran into the scene and like pounded on like a fake door. And I opened the door and started to talk and this person screamed over me. And they go, I'm a NASCAR driver. I'm a NASCAR driver. And I'm also a werewolf. And it's a full moon. And obviously they were panicking, like they were just drowning on stage. And so I took a moment and was like, beat, beat, beat. And I just went, well, better come inside. And then somebody edited, but I was like, that is the worst. I also joked when I was in classes, me and my friends joked that the best improv initiation would be to come into a scene, wait for somebody to join you, and then say, fuck you, where are we?

Which I think would be a... Oh my God.

Which would just be a really funny initiation to be like, fuck you, where are we? Start with conflict and the unknown.

I love that. You're pointing to Erin. And so I started making a bunch of Jeremy Renner references. I think I did like Hawkeye. I did the Bourne movies. I was just like dropping Jeremy Renner things and I was getting nothing from them. And then after the show, I went up to them and I was like, hey, why in that scene did you name me Jeremy Renner? I was like doing all these Jeremy Renner things. Like, what did you want there? And they were like, is Jeremy Renner a person? I was like, yeah, it's like a famous actor. And they were like, yeah, I think I did a Hurt Locker thing. They were like, I had no idea. And I was like, you just said the name Jeremy Renner?

And they were like, I can't wait to find out who this was.

I'll tell you off mic. But that was truly insane. Off mic? He's usually so good. He was off that night. Oh he's great. But I will say that Becca Barish, who's done our Hi Riddle Riddle episode on Patreon, she's also been on our D&D Riddle episode. Becca Barish performed on an improv team with Jeff Dow. And Jeff Dow, if you've ever seen him perform if you're from Chicago, he's an absolute genius but he's also one of the worst improvisers I've ever seen in my life. I would hate to play on a team with him, but I have enjoyed doing shows with him. But Becca came on and she said something to Jeff at an initiation line that was like, Mr. Mayor, something, something, something. I can't remember what the line was. And Jeff looked at her and said, I'm not the mayor. We work at a pizza place and we're out of dough. And the audience went bananas for that line. And I was like, that motherfucker. And he didn't do it because he was panicking. He didn't do it because he's a bad improviser. He did it because he could. Because he could get away with it. And because he knew there was no repercussions. And I saw Becca just give him this fucking look. I hate you so much look. But two seconds later she was laughing.

I feel like someone like Brett Lyons, who we all play with, gets away with stuff like that, where there's certain personalities that they can say and do the worst thing and just get the huge reaction. Where I've done scenes with Brett where I'm like, hey dad, can I borrow the car or something? And he'll be like, I'm not your fucking dad. And I'm like, sorry Greg, I know you're my stepdad. And he goes, what are you talking about? I'm not even your stepdad. I'm younger than you. And I'm like, what? And he's like, I'm a kid that you came up to at school and just started talking to. And I'm like, yep. But the audience is like, this guy rules.

No one loves me as much as audiences love Bret lions. No one loves me like that.

Yeah, get you a man who looks at you like... No, obviously no, and that's fine. Erin, do you have an example? Oh yeah, do you have an example, Erin?

No, I was just thinking of like, not necessarily like someone's initiation line, but in the World News show when the second half of the show we asked for questions from the audience and one time a guy went, What kind of pasta am I? Rigatoni, spaghetti, and he listed a bunch of pastas and we had no idea what to do.

I remember that that was truly insane. I will tell you that I did a really really ham-fisted initiation once in a scene with Erin and we were both laughing so hard we couldn't get out of it which was we were all like on stage and I was like hey are y'all waiting in line for the bathroom because I did a new way where three people could use the same toilet at the same time.

I thought I was gonna throw up.

I could have thrown up.

It was the funniest shit ever.

That was a really really bad initiation don't recommend seeing that as a line in a show. What are the most important animals in your lives? Spaghetti. And then my dog as well, whose name is Spaghetti.

I had a cat growing up named Gus that I loved a lot.

Gus Gus. Badger is a big animal in my life for Magic Tavern, but then also there's a cat named Fries who's a cat I love. I used to think I hated cats and then I met this cat named Fries.

And now you two go on road trips together.

Now we go on road trips. Um, butt fries. What's my girlfriend's cat? Um. Your girlfriend's cat's name is Butt Fries.

Okay. High five me from the other side. Smack! Butt Fries.

What should I do when visiting Chicago this summer? Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight. Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight. Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight. Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight. Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight.

Come see we're a game, we're a new tonight If you can afford it, go to Alinea, which is the best meal you'll ever have. Jesus Christ. You can't afford it. JBC and I have been booked in there.

But it's a $500 meal. But it's worth it. I've never been there.

And I will never be able to afford to go there. Until JBC fix my budget.

I don't recommend it. Fix my budget. And nothing's worth $500.

There's the Museum of Surgical Sciences, which is really cool. I feel like the Museum of Science and History is worth it.

It's pretty great. It's also a beautiful building.

I'd also like to say something on brand for me, which is fucking Google it. Fucking Google it.

I'd say try to get out of downtown is my biggest advice. Don't stay in the downtown area.

Try to get north of Fullerton and you'll feel more like Chicago. Chicago is one of the most segregated cities in the entire country, but we have little pockets of very cool neighborhoods. We have great UVO. We call them hot pockets. We have Hot Pockets. We have great Ethiopian food. We have great Vietnamese food. We have a really cool Chinatown. You shouldn't say we live. I live in a place right next to a baseball field. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. But yeah, go and go and check out some of our cool little neighborhoods.

Yeah, and if you're coming, email us at hropodcast at gmail.com and we'll give you up-to-date recommendations.

We'll send you a big list of things to do in New Orleans if you're coming to Chicago. Nautilus.

Favorite video games? I think my favorite of all time is Bioshock. I also like Mega Man, like Bubble Bubble, Silent Hill.

I mentioned this in the show before, but I watched and played so much Banjo Tooie growing up that that's gotta be my favorite.

Best video game I've ever played. Hands down. No contest. The Witcher 3. So good.

What was the last one you said? Silent Hill? Silent Hill. I don't know what that is.

Silent Hill is fucked.

It was a PlayStation game that came out when I was in high school and it's just like I used to play it with the lights off and it's like you start off in this town where it's like kind of snowing but you can't tell if it's like snow or if it's like ash. And then there's like this weird radio frequencies. So like the closer a monster gets to you, like these weird ghouls, the closer they get, the higher pitch the frequency gets. So the whole time you're playing, you're on edge and like your heckles are up and you're just like, you have goosebumps. And then there's like these, all these jump scares, where it's like a really good horror movie where there's this banging sound in this locker room and you open it and like a cat jumps out and like all these, it's a beautifully made game. But I feel like Bioshock's the best game ever made.

Games like Dead Space, the first Dead Space were very much like that, which was just fucking spooky as hell, which I really loved. The Last of Us, also very spooky but with a really cool story. I like spooky games like that.

Spooky. Spooky. If the three of you were stranded together on a desert, uh, dessert island, if the three of you were standing together on a deserted island and could only take one movie each, who would you kill and eat first?

Is that literally the question?

Yeah, that took a turn. Uh, God.

I think I, okay. And this is meant to be a compliment. We gotta eat Adal first. No, because I think that your diet is the most delicious. Like you eat good food.

I have gout.

I know, but you can have gluten and you can have meat. And we don't have meat or gluten. So I feel like we both won't taste very good. And you, you would love the compliment. Please eat me. That's you. You'd be like, please eat me. I'm going to be delicious.

That's my new catchphrase. Please eat me.

It's like a polite Bart Simpson.

I'm a vegetarian. I'm an ovalacto-vegetarian, though, so I can eat eggs and cheese. So I can't kill either one of you.

You can eat my hair.

I did you both alive, but I'd eat the things that grow off of you like toenails, pubes, hair, teeth.

Pubes? Well, you're lucky. Delicious. Bon Apptit.

I feel like I'd eat JPC first just because then I wouldn't have to hear all his budget talk.

Guys, we have to set aside 20 coconuts. You should save the legs. You should save the legs. Legs are the biggest muscle.

We have 22 crabs. Okay. If we each have, shut up. If there's a musical made about you, who would star in it and what's it about? Well, I feel like it's about your life. It's a musical man about you. Yeah, but like what part of your life?

Send to greatness. No, it's not. It's about me sleeping.

So it'd be Jupiter ascending. Yep. And then send to greatness.

I'm going to pick a musical theater actress.

I think that's, that's the goal, right?

Hmm.

Who is it? The wicked foster, although I love Sutton Foster.

I would pick Stephanie J Bloch to play me, but in like a little bit later in my life. That's who I pick.

Were you trying to say Mary J Bloch? Thank you, thank God you're here, JPC. Yeah, I get that a lot from women.

I would have Brian Darcy James play me. Cool. He's great. And it would just be a musical about Warren Plaid being a dad.

I've heard better, I am just saying.

I'd have Lin-Manuel Miranda play me and it would all be all about my kind of rise to power coming from an immigrant in the 1700s. It's really become kind of the foremost backer of our financial system.

And you're a bastard in a Scotsman. Yeah, well the son of one. If you had access to resources to make any game you wanted, board game, video game, etc., what would you make? Foursquare.

I would create like a questionee, like a personal questionee game that people can play at bars with their friends.

Absolutely.

Cause I get a lot of flack from my friends where, especially Harrison Lott, who goes, stop having structured conversations. Let's just have a conversation. Cause I'm like, let's talk superlatives. If we were all a list.

If I had infinite, infinite resources and money, right? Yeah. Okay. Go ahead. Do you have it? I have mine. Go ahead. I would make a really fucking awesome, like really good, really fun to play. Great graphics. Very, very good. Video game that was based on a terrible movie like I'd do like Master of Disguise and have like the Dana Carvey movie I'd have Master of Disguise the video game and people would be like why would anyone play this but then like IGN would be like 10 out of 10 like polygon everybody's giving it rave reviews with people like I guess I'm gonna fucking pay $60 and buy the Master of Disguise video game so I basically just troll.

So funny. I love that.

I have two card games I actually want to make. One is like acronyms or acrostics. So it's like cards with letters on them and you deal them out or you can put them in the middle. And as you collect them or see them in the middle, you can make acronyms or acrostics.

I also want to do one... I feel like that's a bunch of sophomores at Yale would be like, this is my favorite thing.

This is my favorite thing. Pithy. Pressy Digitation. And then the other game I want to do, which is one of my favorite ever road trip games, and Erin, you were on a road trip with me when we played this. It's one of my favorite games ever. I'm sure, I did not make this up for sure, but I want to gamify it, which is a card game where one pile of cards says like, Beatles songs or... I created this game! Well, calm down.

I did! And I taught it to you two in the car and you flipped it and it was really fun.

Like I said, I made it.

So it's like... Oh no, I made up this game.

Beatles songs or country songs or whatever it is. And you replace one word with a specific word. So one pile would be... Oh nevermind. One pile would be what it is. So it's like a fantasy movie or a book or whatever. Known books. So it's like known entities. And then the other pile would be like it would say like beef on it. And you have to replace one word in that title song whatever with the word beef. So if it's like Beatles songs and the word beef, everyone has to go around and say a Beatles song and replace one word with beef. So it'd be like, I want to hold your beef, beef me do, please, please beef, whatever that is, right? So that's a game I want to make. We played that on the road to Kalamazoo.

We did, and that's not the game I thought you were about to say. What game did you think I was thinking of? The game that I was thinking of is the one we played back from the escape room that Sean and I play all the time, which is either you give a song and then you talk about what scene in the movie that song would come, or you give a type of scene in the movie like this is the part of the movie where a car is spinning in slow motion and the like the hero of the movie walks out of the car really cool with like a gun and it's like looking really cool and then you pick the song for that.

That was a very fun video. I remember a cry laughing at that.

You two were freaky good at it and it was blowing my mind.

I think one scene I described was like a dad driving a car and he puts down the top. It's like a convertible and he puts down the top and it's snowing. But then he turns up the radio and it's, uh, what is it? Long September by Counting Crows or what's that?

Long December.

Long November. It's been a long July. We're just going to do a couple more here. Um, this might be our penultimate question. Would you do another escape room episode given the reception of the first one?

Yeah.

Yeah, I think it's hard because I don't think people want us to come to do their escape rooms because... It spoils it.

It spoils it. If you're about to retire an escape room, we will come and do a recording there because then we're not going to spoil anything.

Yeah, so we were lucky enough our friends Ann and Chris do adventures in time and space in Champaign and Urbana and they were retiring it. They're making new rooms. So we were lucky enough to have them invite us down.

I've said this to Adal before, but I have a dream that a big old timey movie producer, Hollywood guy, hears our show and goes, what kind of TV show do you want to make? And they make a different escape room for the three of us and a guest every week.

Wait, I've had that same dream, but he has no face and it's like an infinite void and then you can't move and you're screaming.

I had that same dream, but you were naked, JPC, and covered in infinite blood.

Saying, I'm not going to pay my bill.

But yeah, I think we would definitely do another escape room at Superfire.

Netflix, if you're listening, the three of us do an escape room every week with a new guest. I think, honestly?

Netflix doesn't have any escape room-based shows right now, so that's big.

Seriously. I want to do that. I think it's off the air, but Jimmy Parto did a show, right, that was escape rooms? But it was just whoever, and then he would comment on how dumb they were.

I think someone should produce that and then do a campaign. Tweet at any network and say, let's make a show happen.

Any network? I'm not doing this for fucking MTV. I'm not gonna do it for CW. Shit, we just burned it too.

I will only do it for CW.

Some fucking handsome teen plays JPC, no thanks.

Some handsome teen. Did you say handsome?

Everything else stays the same.

All right, I'm ready. Let's see here. There's a few redundancies. Oh, let's get into. Yeah. So here's a, this will be rapid fire. And this is a pointed one for each of us. JPC, why did you name her spaghetti?

I used to post a picture of spaghetti every day on Facebook around the same time for two years. And it would always say treating myself to a good, fuck, what did it say? It said treating myself to a good something. Happy Monday, happy Tuesday, happy Wednesday. I posted that nonstop for two years and then deleted my Facebook and then I named my dog Spaghetti.

Says Adal, who would win in a fight? Chunt or Adam Peculare? Chunt would win because badgers are ferocious animals. I think the most ferocious animals second only to Wolverines.

I think he would also verbally just tear it out.

Verbally Chunt would just destroy an unpeculare because he's too paranoid. And then Erin, how often does Mitch ask you to stop talking about him on the podcast?

Sweet Mitch is so patient. Do you call him Sweet Mitch? Yeah, he's so sweet. Is that like a Neil Diamond song? He's such a good sport and so nice that he often doesn't say anything, but every other person I'm related to is so defensive of him and so I'll have cousins being like, I love the show, but like leave Mitch alone. Like just cousins upon cousins.

Lay off of Mitch.

I love that guy.

We're going to do two more and then we're done. If Kidz Bop covered your favorite song, what would the new kid appropriate title or lyrics be? So I would want Kidz Bop to cover my neck, my back, my kitty, and my cat. My neck, my back, my kitty, and my cat.

That's pretty nice. God, I wish I had longer to think about this.

So Kidz Bop covered your favorite song. What were the new kid appropriate title or lyrics?

So that implies that your favorite song is like, filthy. It's very filthy. Um, which I don't know that I know a lot of.

What's your favorite song?

I don't have a favorite. It's Freefallen by Tom Petty.

Mine might be Obvious Child by Paul Simon, which that could say the same. How does that one go?

I will say that right now I've been listening to Lizzo's new album a lot and Juice, which is the song that's been out forever off that album is so great and I guess I would just love to hear a Kidz Bop version of Juice. We call it Juice Box. Yeah, Juice Box. Just call it Juice Box. There's probably some curse words in there that you can't say, but everything else, maybe I just wanted to hear the kids curse, actually.

What if Frankie goes to Hollywood, relax when you want to fun?

That's pretty good. Yeah. You can do an entire Patreon. That's just the... Sure.

Just Kids Puff. And then we record it. We should do a Patreon album where we go into a professional recording studio.

Get a bunch of kids. Find a bunch of kids.

And kill them. Yeah. You had me at Find a Bunch of Kids. Here we go, last question, which I think this is a good- I stumbled upon this, but it's a good one to end on.

Also, because we didn't get to everyone's question, and there's so many, should we promise at 1500 we do another?

Let's say if we get to 1001. No. Dominations. Let's say... Hey, why don't you just keep writing the fucking reviews? Yeah, keep doing the reviews. 1500? I'd be okay with that.

And we'll do another AMA.

1500 five-star reviews on iTunes. We'll do another AMA. So we'll see how popular this one is. It could be that people... No one cares.

It's Monday, no blank.

And if we get six reviews on Google Play, we'll do another one of these.

Ooh. Turn on your Zunes and give us a review. Here's the last question. What's been your favorite thing about doing the podcast so far?

Oh, that's a good one to end on. Hands.

I feel like with this podcast and with Magic Tavern, my absolute favorite thing is fan art. I feel like anytime a character, a moment, anything that we discuss on an episode is made by fans. It absolutely warms my heart. I immediately send it to everyone I know. And yeah, it makes me feel like I've actually done something with it.

Yeah, and if you send us fanart on a platform that we can reshare and repost, I think which is Twitter pretty much, right? And Instagram. You can redo it on Instagram.

And Facebook.

And email.

Either way. I forgot to show you, Erin, somebody made it up more.

Oh my god, will you send me that?

A lot of people, I showed her, a lot of people make her character Momo the Mouse. Do fan art for it.

I think send us fan art and we will obviously absolutely repost it and retweet it because the fan art stuff is very cool.

So that's my favorite thing about doing the podcast is the fan art. Erin, JPC, think for yourselves.

I have four things. Oh, please. But I'll go through them really, really quickly. We did the episode where I talked about my childhood pretend friend and a bunch of people drew that. Wizzy. All the fan art that people sent made me cry and it was just like this beautiful thing that people connected to and then took the time to do. My phone background is still a picture of me and Wizzy. Seriously. So I love that. I love how often I get to laugh. I just know that three hours a week is meant for joy and that's amazing.

We said earlier we record for four hours.

I know what I said. I know what I said. I like meeting fans after world news.

Oh yeah.

And one of the bigger things is like when college age females will message me on like Instagram and like talk about like maybe they're going through a hard time or they're in college and they're feeling a little lost and they like really love the show and they appreciate like me on the show. It is the best because like that was a really hard time for me. Yeah. So like in the podcast I listened to that and were huge for me. So.

I know what I'm about to say is a joke, but I get a lot of those messages from college females. Shut up!

Shut up!

I said it was a joke! One of my favorite things about this and about the podcast medium in general is that, you know, I spent a long time doing improv shows. Improv shows are very of the moment. But the really, really cool thing about podcasts has actually happened today. This gives you a hint as to when we're recording this. Hi Riddle.

The permanence of it. That's why I love, I don't mean to cut it off, but I just want to add to it. That's such a huge part of why I love doing podcasts and that's all I want to do now is podcast. I've quit improv teams to do more podcasts because the permanence of it where it's like people will continue to stumble upon this for the rest of your life versus like improv is such a, oh yeah.

Get ready.

Buy new locks.

Potential employers.

But it's a thing of like an improv. If you weren't in the room, it's so hard to capture that or retell it. But with this, you can tell people about it and they'll always find it.

Yeah. And that's so cool. I think that it's cool that like, you know, a person in Japan or a person in Kenosha, Wisconsin can be like having a very similar experience.

You know Kenosha's in Japan, right?

Oh, motherfucker. I got a bunch of mail that's fucking fucked.

You think you have Kyoto, Wisconsin.

And then people just can find it from different places and cultures and languages. I just think that's very, very cool.

Absolutely.

I agree.

Well, thank you all so much for listening to this. If you can, please buy tickets to our show in LA. That's at the Hollywood Improv again on Mother's Day, May 12th. You can buy tickets at headgum.com slash live. Come see the three of us at World News tonight. We perform every Saturday at 8 p.m. and 10 p.m. at I.O. Theatre in Chicago. Please stick around afterwards and say hi. Fans have been so incredible with doing that, so please do that. Also, right now, as you're listening to this, maybe pull up your app, the iTunes app on your phone, or on your computer, or whatever you use, and leave us a five-star review right now. Or, if not five-star, two.

No! No! Three! Three!

And recommend us to a friend or a co-worker that you think could use it right now. Absolutely. And we would love to do another one of these if we get to $1,500.

To $1,500. And we also have, if you want more Hey Riddle in your life, we have what we call the Clue Crew, which is our Patreon. For $5 a month, you can join our Patreon. We give new episodes, brand new episodes, with non-riddle content every Friday. And we also have some special things that works with that. Live shows, things like that.

They all end up there. Yeah. And you know, if you've really enjoyed this, just hang around for another 48 hours and then our actual show on Wednesdays will download on your phone and then just hang around for another 48 hours in our Friday show. And so don't do anything else in an empty room and just wait for our shows to come out.

Try to look at a gray wall.

You can't. You can't. And I think to take us out, Erin, would you mind singing just another 30 seconds to a minute and we'll kind of, KJ might slowly fade it out. Can you just sing like another minute of obvious child?

Obvious tiled.

What did I say? Obvious child.

I'll change it to tiled. Is it tiled or tiled? I wanted to sing one of your favorite songs and now I forget. My neck, my back. Oh yeah, I don't want to sing that. Now I'm going to panic. Okay, that's the show. Thanks so much everybody.

KJ, will you come in the room? KJ? KJ? KJ? Can they hear me? KJ? Come in the room?

Can you think of it?

And we'll end on, since Erin forgot the lyrics, we're gonna end on KJ saying their favorite thing about doing the podcast so far. KJ, I'm gonna stall by repeating that question. KJ, what's your favorite thing about doing the podcast so far?

I also love the listeners. I've gotten some very kind messages. I've gotten followed by a bunch of queer listeners and some have even sent me messages that are like, oh my gosh, I love that all of the hosts use your pronouns and are nice. That's really cool. And KJ, Adal wrote Jupiter on a card in front of you. That's what you were supposed to say. Oh yeah.

It's Jupiter! Bye forever. That was the best part of the episode. Created by Adal Rifai. Starring Erin Keif and John Patrick Coan. KJ Steiner did the editing and already parented the music. Go created by M.O.E. Artemis and M.O.E. the BONUS.